12-18 month support

[[Si...]]

Coop,

 

I was on Cipro for a long time for a protate infection when I was 18. When I first started taking it, I was hallucinating so I quit. I went back in it after a few weeks, but by that time the infection was bad. I still have to deal with that pain It didn't dawn in me that the Cipro could cause problems like that until I read about it here. I think taking it is what started my affliction with IBS. I would avoid it if you can. Hope you start feeling better soon!

[[Gr...]]

http://www.benzo.org.uk/amisc/reconnexion10.pdf

 

Have you all seen this? It's a lot of info but easy to read and very validating. Should print this and send it to every doc who was clueless in this journey.

 

I started reading it, Peace.  It's very good.

 

It's really amazing there haven't been any studies on the effects of these drugs, the fact they're almost impossible to get off.  They study everything.  Someone has to eventually blow the lid off, do an expose on benzos and other psych drugs.  Like Big Tobacco.  We need a whistleblower.

[[Gr...]]

Good Morning ... how fast I forget ... had a good sleep ... and woke up to a full course of stuff ... and the anxiety revving at max ...

 

Crazy stuff ... thought I was going to collapse ... and of course I am not ... but the beast gave me a good shaking this morning ... went out for a walk to the grocery store with the lyrics from "Joyful, Joyful" flowing through my head ... thought I was going nuts ... so just smiled and kept toddling along ... what else is there to do? ...

 

So ... hanging out with my benzo belly and the anxiety and the zaps and zots of nerve stuff and muscle spasms ... and remembering Tuesday's good long walk  ...

 

Another day in paradise ... 

 

Nova, I think this might be the pattern until healing,  bad days, better days?  Hopefully you get enough better days so you can get out there.

 

The 19th is month 21 for you?

[[Gr...]]

Hey everybody! Can it really be this bad at 16.5 off? I'm in acute, I feel like I'm dying everyday. I was functional last year. Am I alone? Does it get better?

 

Yes, it can be that bad.  No, you're not alone.  And, yes, it does get better.  Believe it or not, worse in the second year is normal, around here, anyway.  I had a very bad first year, and still the second year is giving me a run for the money.

 

The good news?  This is home stretch.  You're almost there.  Hang on.

[[pe...]]

I agree, Green. People try though, like Robert Whitaker.  But people don't want to believe. I don't know how we get heard in this. I was surprised to see that Exxon mobile is behind that link.

 

Oneday,

I'm 2 days away from 17 months and have had symptoms this whole time. They have lessened and intensified. Seem to be both better and worse at this point - like some are leaving but others are increasing or coming out of nowhere.

 

I am feeling really agitated. I think they call it akathasia or something. Lots of vibrating, head pressure, jumping at every sound. My symptoms are doing a rapid cycling from one to the next. Oh my. Hoping it lets up. As always.

 

Peace2

 

 

[[Gr...]]

Hi Beulah,...are you moving into that evening  better time?...Thank you so much for that mashed potato/turkey ( or chicken) reccommendation. My appetite is so poor and the antibiotics made it worse. The potatoes/turkey was perfect. Speaking of antibiotics....I am going on a full out rant here....I hAve been asking since Monday for my culture results. No call back. This morning I got a little assertive and crabby. Someone went and got the culture results for me....completely normal ....so I could have saved myself some stomach issues and headache ...if they had returned my calls....I am just glad I didn't get talked into the Cipro..which I found out ...is not considered safe in people over 60....uugghhhh.....

....Beulah, did you still get random bouts of d/r?.. I got hit this afternoon with wicked d/r...I am so dissociated that I can barely think....complete fog. ...I can feel my anxiety through it . I know it will let up, but mercy!...I haven't had it this thick in months.. .

.....How are you doing?....Did you get to enjoy some more lavender tea and sit out in the evening?. ...Wishing you sunbreaks for tomorrow....coop

 

Coop,

The DR and the fog are very intense sx for me.  And the anxiety is the lining underneath.  On and off.  Mostly on.  Still falling asleep at daybreak.  Fortunately I'm able to sleep until 10-11 on a good day, so I'm getting some sleep.  How I'm doing depends on the volume for the day, but it really doesn't shut off completely, except for that time I told you I had some nice clarity for a few hours.  This Monday I start month 20.  I still expect things to get a lot better in the next 4-5 months.  Like you, I can feel some things are so much better.  But make no mistake, this remains a challenge.

 

Hoping the health fears simmer down a little.

[[Gr...]]

Morning,

 

Well Im 14 months off today!!!  Have the day off today and its a lovely warm sunny one. Im hopefully just going to potter in the garden if this fatigue and muscle stiffness will let me. I had such a better day yesterday, last night I felt 'normal' and made the mistake of thinkkng of everything I could do today,  big mistake.  Of course I had crammed a whole summers worth of stuff (in my flawed thinking and pretend healed brain).  Now of course it is a matter of OMG,  I can barely climb the stairs. I think the best way to approach this is the Nova way; go low and slow for now. 

 

Has anyone else lost that ability to do things one at a time and have this crazy sense of urgency that you have to do everything at once? Its hard to explain as I never act on it,  it would be physically impossible.  Its weird

 

My beautiful daughter asked me last night if I would like to go for a walk today,  so I am definately doing that.

Note to self: Accept the things you cant do today and ignore your benzo brain.

 

Blessings and healing to all 

 

......Marj....CONGRATULATIONS....14 months is a huge trek through this journey....strong and courageous and determined you are. ....

....Yes, I think all of us have done the same thing...doing a ton of things on good days. and feeling it the next. ..You seem so steady in your ability to call out the Benzo lies as unreality...that is so crucial in getting through this. I am constantly working on developing better access to my rational mind....You are really doing so good Marj.....Wishing you sunbreaks.  coop

 

Congrats, Marj!

 

[[Gr...]]

Coop,

 

I was on Cipro for a long time for a protate infection when I was 18. When I first started taking it, I was hallucinating so I quit. I went back in it after a few weeks, but by that time the infection was bad. I still have to deal with that pain It didn't dawn in me that the Cipro could cause problems like that until I read about it here. I think taking it is what started my affliction with IBS. I would avoid it if you can. Hope you start feeling better soon!

 

Siggy, I also have problems with IBS.  That's why I was first prescribed benzos so many years ago.

 

Hopefully when withdrawal is over we will both see some improvement with the IBS.  Ppl see improvement with pre existing panic and anxiety, so maybe there's hope for our IBS

[[Gr...]]

I agree, Green. People try though, like Robert Whitaker.  But people don't want to believe. I don't know how we get heard in this. I was surprised to see that Exxon mobile is behind that link.

 

Oneday,

I'm 2 days away from 17 months and have had symptoms this whole time. They have lessened and intensified. Seem to be both better and worse at this point - like some are leaving but others are increasing or coming out of nowhere.

 

I am feeling really agitated. I think they call it akathasia or something. Lots of vibrating, head pressure, jumping at every sound. My symptoms are doing a rapid cycling from one to the next. Oh my. Hoping it lets up. As always.

 

Peace2

 

Peace, no one is blowing the lid off of this.  every psychotropic drug has the same mechanism of action as benzos.  there's just too much money, from the drug companies on down.  They can get you on them easily enough, it's getting you off they haven't quite figured out.

[[Co...]]

Peace, thanks for the link.. it's all so sad and unbelievable.  It is a literal crime.  ..I do believe it is all about money. The FDA is hand in hand with the big pharma companies. Now pharma companies are actually putting patents on thier drugs so other companies can not manufacture them and then charging people tons of money for thier prescriptions. They are trying to phase out generics. Drugs are approved without authentic trials and research. The whole thing is more than scary... We all need to take really good care of ourselves and stay healthy

....Was today your last day with students?.  You are almost done with the school year..  Still can't believe you worked in a classroom all the way through this.. you and HH.  ..

...Here's to summer for you MightyGirl.  ...coop

[[pe...]]

Hi Coop,

I was done with students yesterday. I have 29 reports to write and meetings to attend through next Friday the 19th. Not sure how the reports are going to get done, one at a time i guess. Will start them tomorrow.

I am so leery of drugs that I kept my child off drops for pink eye, just for a day to see if we could clear it naturally. My husband is equally suspicious. I don't trust the FDA at all. We've got to get healthy and then stay that way!

 

Love you both, Green and Coop.

[[Co...]]

Green..  man, ..sorry that your sleep is not good yet.  Yes, that is a perfect  description ...the anxiety being the lining of the d/r.  that's just what it has been today. ...Green, do you have this every day?.....I am with you...I think there is a lot of healing to happen in the next 4, 5, 6 months...

.....This is so hard.  How would we ever do this without each

other.  ,....thinking of you Green....coop

[[Co...]]

MightyGirl.....we love you too.....yep the reports...teachers put in so much more work than the 8 hour day....I so wish none of this had never happened to any of us....coop

[[Co...]]

Coop,

 

I was on Cipro for a long time for a protate infection when I was 18. When I first started taking it, I was hallucinating so I quit. I went back in it after a few weeks, but by that time the infection was bad. I still have to deal with that pain It didn't dawn in me that the Cipro could cause problems like that until I read about it here. I think taking it is what started my affliction with IBS. I would avoid it if you can. Hope you start feeling better soon!

 

......Sig....sorry that happened to you...it is a wicked superbug antibiotic. Supposedly it is reserved for only very serious infections. ...I refused it and ended up in an argument with the ARNP...but I wasn't about to take it. I took another antibiotic, but stopped it today when my culture results came back normal....I hope your IBS clears up as you heal....coop

[[be...]]

Hi Beulah,...are you moving into that evening  better time?...Thank you so much for that mashed potato/turkey ( or chicken) reccommendation. My appetite is so poor and the antibiotics made it worse. The potatoes/turkey was perfect. Speaking of antibiotics....I am going on a full out rant here....I hAve been asking since Monday for my culture results. No call back. This morning I got a little assertive and crabby. Someone went and got the culture results for me....completely normal ....so I could have saved myself some stomach issues and headache ...if they had returned my calls....I am just glad I didn't get talked into the Cipro..which I found out ...is not considered safe in people over 60....uugghhhh.....

....Beulah, did you still get random bouts of d/r?.. I got hit this afternoon with wicked d/r...I am so dissociated that I can barely think....complete fog. ...I can feel my anxiety through it . I know it will let up, but mercy!...I haven't had it this thick in months.. .

.....How are you doing?....Did you get to enjoy some more lavender tea and sit out in the evening?. ...Wishing you sunbreaks for tomorrow....coop

 

Hey coop, glad your culture is normal. You're right, if they had called you back sooner 

Ciprofloxacin is a nasty drug that they need to pull..should never be prescribed IMO..lots of other wide spectrum antibiotics out there without doing the harm that  cipro does. I've taken cipro many times in my life and I will never take it again. So many Cipro lawsuits out there!

Yes, I still get random d/r, especially in waves. I had d/r yesterday but it was short lived.

 

Yes, I sat outside for almost three hours this evening sipping my lavender tea and gazing at the moon..I love summer nights.

I'm sleepy but I hate to go to bed because my symptoms are low and I'm trying to enjoy every moment I get like these low symptom evenings..sometimes I dread mornings..they were getting better..but that stopped.

Maybe you'll feel a bit better after stopping the antibiotic. Try to eat some yogurt if you can..it will help with the GI stuff..probiotics are our friends.

Hope you get some sleep. Hugs. Healing happens

 

 

[[Co...]]

Thanks Beulah.  I am so glad that you had a nice evening with no sx. ...My mornings were becoming very nice a few months ago...now, like you...they are unpredictable.

....The Cipro thing makes me so angry. I read a fairly reliable article about that clearly recommended that it not be given to patients over 60 because it is so hard on the body and was developed to treat unusual and highly resistant illnesses.  Apparently some physicians just prescribe it casually ...Scares me to death of ever needing real medical care...I am seriously considering taking the genotype testing for meds that I shouldn't have...I think it would be worth it.

....So let's eat mashed potatoes and turkey....put raw honey in our lavender tea ...heal from benzos and stay well

  ...Beulah, I am wishing you a better morning....coop

[[No...]]

Good Morning ... almost 4 AM here ... slept for about 7 hours ... woke up feeling loopy again ... yesterday almost made it to miserable ... will see how today goes ...

 

My attention span or focus seems to be out of whack again ... has been for a couple of days ... seem to be running on auto-pilot ... at least I think there is a pilot there somewhere ... not very conversational, this pilot ...

 

Another day in the books ...

 

Hope we all have a quiet day ... 

[[Ko...]]

Onedayatatime,

I'm so sorry you're at the horrible acute place again.  I hit that at about 15 months and it lasted through month 16. I'm now starting my 19th month and symptoms are somewhat better compared to those I was feeling in 15 & 16.  I can remember that they just wouldn't let up at all.  I wanted to reinstate and I was taking about 10 or 12 Advil a day to try to stop the pain.  What finally helped was I got a prescription for Lyrica and took 25 mg 3x a day and it helped to ease the symptoms enough to give me hope again.  The Lyrica stopped working so I stopped taking it.  I use it now when my lower legs & feet really sting and I think it helps a little. I refuse to take the high doses that some doctors recommend because I don't want to have to get off another drug.

 

I'm now suffering from Benzo Belly pain and pressure, stinging legs & numb feet, insomnia in the night (can sleep in the day) & Boatiness 24/7. I've adapted to the Boatiness, so it doesn't really bother me so much, but the severely stinging legs hurts and keeps me awake. Anyway, I'm a lot better than I was at month 15 & 16.  So you'll get better too.

[[Si...]]

Coop,

 

I was on Cipro for a long time for a protate infection when I was 18. When I first started taking it, I was hallucinating so I quit. I went back in it after a few weeks, but by that time the infection was bad. I still have to deal with that pain It didn't dawn in me that the Cipro could cause problems like that until I read about it here. I think taking it is what started my affliction with IBS. I would avoid it if you can. Hope you start feeling better soon!

 

......Sig....sorry that happened to you...it is a wicked superbug antibiotic. Supposedly it is reserved for only very serious infections. ...I refused it and ended up in an argument with the ARNP...but I wasn't about to take it. I took another antibiotic, but stopped it today when my culture results came back normal....I hope your IBS clears up as you heal....coop

 

Thanks the IBS is the least of my worries right now. I'm still only sleeping every other night. The IBS has calmed down since I've cut almost all refined sugar out. I keep worrying something is permanently screwed up in my brain and I'll never sleep normally again.

[[Ko...]]

12-18 buddies,

 

This is a Very disturbing news article... Read it if you get a chance.  Not sure if this well open for you.

You can find the original link in Benzo in The News section. 40 million prescriptions paid by Medicare alone. How many are there if you count everyone?

 

http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/one-nation-under-sedation-medicare-paid-for-nearly-40-million-tranquilizer-prescriptions-in-2013/ar-BBkVitu?ocid=ansnewsNYDailyNews11#page=1

 

[[Co...]]

Korbe,.. thanks for this article.. an eye opener. I was surprised by the huge number of older people like myself who are prescribed these drugs.  The association of benzos and alzhiemers is scary.  I would give anything to have never been prescribed ativan.. It has harmed me more than any temporary good it provided

....Korbe, I am glad you are pulling out of the 16-19 month 'second acute'.  ....better days are are so close for us.  Wishing you a good good day....coop

[[Co...]]

Nova.  Thinking of you dear friend.  Hope your day opens up to better.  We are all slogging through these last month's with you. . coop

[[Co...]]

Well...I am somewhere between acute and better. Cycling in and out of those 2 states all day. From panic to ok at least 4 times a day....Sleep is poor again ( about 5 hours and wake up with the yuk)  If I had a shred of faith in any medication I would trule consider an adjunct medication, but after this misery I am scared to even think about it. It seems that they all come with w/d consequences....so no way out but through...I am just so tired of not having much 'normal' in my life yet ....Health fear remains my most prominent sx...The antibiotic left me with upper gastric pain and I am constantly thinking I am having a heart attack.  I know that I am not but that doesn't help me out much. .Onward....Wishing everyone some sunbreaks and a better day today.  coop

[[No...]]

Hi Coop ... this day is now officially miserable for me ... feel like I am being strangled and zaps and zots in arms and legs ... and I am pregnant again ... fourth time this week ... 

 

Went to the meat market anyway ... felt like hell but made it home ... taking the rest of the day off ...

 

Pianogirl mentioned that everything gets screwed up from "peeing to seeing" ... thought that was pretty apt ...

 

Hope you have a quiet day ... 

[[Co...]]

Nova.. it stinks...I am right there with you today.  I have had 3 heart attacks since yesterday and a stroke is in process.. Like you. I am clinging to whatever parts of my routine I can manage and trying to 'lean into' the fear...and grasp for the flimsy rag tag bits of my elusive rational mind. Trying to find that space where I can detach and just let it flow over me. In acute I was able to do that better...I just took it for granted that every awful thing was w/d abd I would get over it and feel back to normal in 6 months ( ha!)...lamb to the slaughter...

  ..For this day I am trying to pretend that I don't have these sx.. denial ? coping? ...who knows my brain is broken from thinking about w/d 24/7.... so trying to think of other things...or not think at all....that seems to be the best..

....You are not alone today Nova...I am in the row boat with you...I truly hope this day gets better for both of us.  Love to you...coop