12-18 month support

[[dr...]]

Coop-doggy :smitten:

 

Siggy-I got a mouth guard and it's very beneficial.  Just an FYI

[[Si...]]

Coop-doggy :smitten:

 

Siggy-I got a mouth guard and it's very beneficial.  Just an FYI

 

Thanks for the tip!

[[je...]]

Sky-sorry your having a rough day, and yes I agree we have to stop comparing ourselves to non sick people-- I do that all the time too. Its hard when you've been as sick as long as we all have been. Im going on 5 years now of being sick, from taking the drug, to tolerance, taper, and post w/d-- 5 freaking years of my life! I'm sure we are all in the same boat, but without a doubt we are getting close to the end.

Peace--I'm positive that any new med would just make you worse in the long run. You've been doing really well, your probably just in a wave and it will pass soon. Sorry you ate still dealing with this, I still have bad bouts of it too-especially around my cycle. Hugs

Coop-- when I was in my 20's I traveled with a friend of mine back to her town in Washington-- it was called Pasco. Is that anywhere near you? Anyhow, it was beautiful there I really loved it.

[[pe...]]

Hi Jenny,

Thanks for weighing in. I took a stinkin multivitamin today and anxiety through the roof. I can only imagine what a med would do!

Five years is a long time, too long. I hope you're having improvements and feeling better along the way. Sounds like the soccer wrap up went pretty well. Hope it just keeps in that direction.

 

Hug,

Peace2

[[Si...]]

Wide awake again. I took magnesium and Theanine. Now my head hurts. Think I'm just going to give up on both. Thought the mag would help me sleep. No such luck.

[[Gr...]]

Jenny, I know maNY people who have babies in thier 40s. A very good friend of mine had her second son at age 44...I think they had a little infertility assist, but not the complicated hoopty-do stuff....As for me, I was unable to conceive a second child at 42...My daughter is adopted...I often forget that she is adopted. We had a lovely birth mother choose us as adoptive parents. We have had a very successful open adoption. My daughter has had a loving free flowing relationship with both of her  birth parents....and both sets of birth grandparents. It wouldn't work for everyone, but it just happened that everyone involved wanted what was best for our daughter and was mature enough to stay focused on that. We adopted her at birth...although we were not at the birth, I have always felt that the birth of a child is sacred and belongs singularly to that mother and child. We waited 3 days ( with bated breath) to give our daughter and her birth mother time to settle. We took a 6 week moritrium in which we requested private time to get our feet on the ground and bond with a newborn ( my son was 13 at the time)....It took some initial work and a little counseling ( her birth mother was only 16 as well as the birth father)...and one set of birth grandparents were grieving because they wanted to adopt her, but her very mature and brave birthmother did not want it to go that way. We have never been sorry, our daughter grew up with so many people who love her ( although we were always very clear in our boundaries about parenting and setting the ground rules). ....It truly made some of the psychological challenges of being an adopted child easier for our girl.  She is all grown up now and still has close relationships with her birth families....especially the birth mother and birth mother's parents. It is uncanny how alike she is to the birth mother's mother...I can easily see striking personality similarities...truly much of our personalities are genetic...

....Well, that was long...and totally off topic...really fun to write about something besides sx and w/d

....I hope you conceive another child...babies rock...and make our lives sweet and hopeful and sacred....

.....How are you doing ? ...I am low and slow today ...just barely holding my own...but hanging on...coop

 

Coop, I join Jenny in saying, what a beautiful story!  My boys were also both adopted at birth

[[Gr...]]

Drew, yes I have her book and sleep with it some nights...I am just in that awful place of thinking there is something seriously wrong with me....even though all the tests I had in the last 10 days say I am fine. Being quiet today has helped...I am anxious to start therapy for obssessive compulsive health fear, but couldn't get an appointment for 3 weeks out.  I didn't even have it like this in the first year.  I feel a little crazy ...really, if that would let up I think I would be at a decent baseline and strong enough to keep moving forward. .Time Time Time....keep reminding myself that so much healing could happen in the next 6 months...

....hold on Drew, you are go all the way...coop

 

Coop, I find the therapy very helpful for the intrusive thoughts.  Like certain ones that keep coming back, we discussed and they had a lot less punch in a wave.  Hope you get someone good.

[[Gr...]]

Hi Jenny,

Thanks for weighing in. I took a stinkin multivitamin today and anxiety through the roof. I can only imagine what a med would do!

Five years is a long time, too long. I hope you're having improvements and feeling better along the way. Sounds like the soccer wrap up went pretty well. Hope it just keeps in that direction.

 

Hug,

Peace2

 

Peace, I took  a whey protein drink in month 7 and didn't sleep for two months.  I wouldn't go near a vitamin.  It will pass.

[[Gr...]]

Hi Everyone,

 

Sounds like we're all still limping along. Me, too.  I have lots of physical symptoms, but I'm making a real effort to function as best I can, walk, show up for some social stuff, even if I don't stay long.  Insomnia, still bad.  Body aches and pains, stiffness.  Nova, I've got that neck and shoulder pain and stiffness, going into the scalp.  Also, benzo flu on and off.  And pretty solid DR, cog fog, which is protective and for which I'm very grateful, considering the alternative these days.

 

What's good.  Not much anxiety, not many mental sx, so it's easier to cope and I'm not flipping out. 

 

Everyone, hoping you all feel better soon.

 

 

[[No...]]

Good Morning ... miserable day yesterday ... and a miserable night ... the physical stuff cycling back and forth ... all the usual culprits ...

 

Just tagging along and trying to stay slow and not get too mentally tangled up ... this is tough for all of us ... and it is perhaps not as "crazy" as months past ...

 

Hanging onto the thought that this is my healing life right now ... it is what it is until it isn't ... 

[[No...]]

Hi Siggy ... sorry to hear you are having another restless night ... and that is one of the biggest strains on us mentally, the coming and going of stuff, with nothing being predictable ...

 

Hope you get some rest before morning ... 

[[No...]]

Hi Coop ... I see your light on ... hope you are having a quiet evening and getting some rest ... 

[[Si...]]

Hi Siggy ... sorry to hear you are having another restless night ... and that is one of the biggest strains on us mentally, the coming and going of stuff, with nothing being predictable ...

 

Hope you get some rest before morning ... 

 

Thanks. Usually if I don't fall asleep within the first hour or so it never happens. I try and do something and then try to sleep again and I just never can drift off like I use to prebenzo. I wish I would have never taken this crap. I can't even decide now if the insomnia is from w/d or not. It's absolute torture.

[[No...]]

Siggy ... I find trying to "decide" anything connected to this process is almost always fruitless ... usually the best I can do is "wait and see" ... and then wait some more ...

 

I try not to get too tangled up in trying to figure this stuff out ... I suspect the "logic" of this process is way beyond any thinking I can do about it ...

[[Sk...]]

Jenny, I know maNY people who have babies in thier 40s. A very good friend of mine had her second son at age 44...I think they had a little infertility assist, but not the complicated hoopty-do stuff....As for me, I was unable to conceive a second child at 42...My daughter is adopted...I often forget that she is adopted. We had a lovely birth mother choose us as adoptive parents. We have had a very successful open adoption. My daughter has had a loving free flowing relationship with both of her  birth parents....and both sets of birth grandparents. It wouldn't work for everyone, but it just happened that everyone involved wanted what was best for our daughter and was mature enough to stay focused on that. We adopted her at birth...although we were not at the birth, I have always felt that the birth of a child is sacred and belongs singularly to that mother and child. We waited 3 days ( with bated breath) to give our daughter and her birth mother time to settle. We took a 6 week moritrium in which we requested private time to get our feet on the ground and bond with a newborn ( my son was 13 at the time)....It took some initial work and a little counseling ( her birth mother was only 16 as well as the birth father)...and one set of birth grandparents were grieving because they wanted to adopt her, but her very mature and brave birthmother did not want it to go that way. We have never been sorry, our daughter grew up with so many people who love her ( although we were always very clear in our boundaries about parenting and setting the ground rules). ....It truly made some of the psychological challenges of being an adopted child easier for our girl.  She is all grown up now and still has close relationships with her birth families....especially the birth mother and birth mother's parents. It is uncanny how alike she is to the birth mother's mother...I can easily see striking personality similarities...truly much of our personalities are genetic...

....Well, that was long...and totally off topic...really fun to write about something besides sx and w/d

....I hope you conceive another child...babies rock...and make our lives sweet and hopeful and sacred....

.....How are you doing ? ...I am low and slow today ...just barely holding my own...but hanging on...coop

 

Coop, I join Jenny in saying, what a beautiful story!  My boys were also both adopted at birth

 

Sue, thanks for reposting this, I had overlooked it, it's a beautiful post, full of hope. 

 

Coop, thanks for sharing with us this truly beautiful experience. 

[[Co...]]

Hi Nova, ...how are you doing?...Really wishing you a better day...how is the rain?....

....things seem to be easing up somewhat for me. The anxiety is not at level 11..  just under the surface.  I am waking up still with some of the morning dread and intrusive thoughts, but they fade once I am up..  I seem to be getting a few hours of sunbreaks at the oddest time.. late evening...health fear is better, but nipping at my heels...so it feels as though this wave wants to roll out...just lingering

.....Nova, hope you get a chance to get out for a little bit in between down pours....Wishing you sunbreaks...coop

[[Co...]]

Buddies, thank you for your kind words about my adoption post... for my family adoption has been a beautiful blessing...

[[Co...]]

Green,.. yet another 'me too'...adoptive moms..  what a joy isn't it....how are you doing sx sister? Did you get out to a show?... hope your month 18 wave is rolling out.  We are due some better days....and they are coming.....can't be too soon ......have a goid day Green...love to you...coop

[[Co...]]

Sig.  Yep, the sleep thing seems to forecast what the day will be like....I am really glad to hear that it is working it's way back to some predictibility. It sounds like that is your one lingering bad sx....you've got this....Wishing you a good day with sunbreaks.....coop

[[Si...]]

Sig.  Yep, the sleep thing seems to forecast what the day will be like....I am really glad to hear that it is working it's way back to some predictibility. It sounds like that is your one lingering bad sx....you've got this....Wishing you a good day with sunbreaks.....coop

 

Thanks Coop! I'm taking a rare day of working from home. Tried more magnesium and theanine this week-end and it was no bueno for me I think. I still didn't sleep and it makes me feel worse than I normally do when I don't sleep. Even though I strangely average 8-10 hours the nights I do sleep, I only get light sleep if any (alpha sleep or micro sleeps) on my off nights. It's just as bizarre as it can be. I would rather do a steady 5 each night than what I am doing.

 

It's great that you adopted. The wife and I have been trying to have a baby for about 3 years now with no luck. We were planning on trying some fertilization treatments, but then I'm stuck in the middle of this garbage.

[[Fi...]]

Siggy--let me put in a good word for the miracle of modern assisted reproduction.  We ended up with three blessings, including a set of twins. Of course, a new baby wouldn't do much for your sleep , but the healing powers of a small child are amazing!  When I'm raging against Big Pharma I need to remember I wouldn't have my kids if it weren't for fertility drugs.

[[Si...]]

Siggy--let me put in a good word for the miracle of modern assisted reproduction.  We ended up with three blessings, including a set of twins. Of course, a new baby wouldn't do much for your sleep , but the healing powers of a small child are amazing!  When I'm raging against Big Pharma I need to remember I wouldn't have my kids if it weren't for fertility drugs.

 

Yeah, I guess I could be the one to tend to them at night as I'd already be up! 

 

Twins run in both our families too. My wife is 35 and I'm 41, so she's getting anxious of course.

[[No...]]

Hi Coop ... windy, rainy, and cool around here for a couple of days ... staying inside ...

 

Got the head pressure stuff and anxiety ... medium grade ... and the bloaty benzo belly ...

 

Made some meatballs and going to do a loaf a bread shortly ...

 

Distracting with designing a rug pattern and cutting yarn ... listening to an audiobook ...

 

Sounds like you are having a quiet morning ...

[[Co...]]

Nova...you're cooking!..  now I know things are lifting up for you...and designing a rug.  Nova, I am so glad to hear this.. carry on dear friend....and love to you.  coop...

[[...]]

Hi everyone,

 

I'm still in the same wavy boat as everyone else. Back at work after week off and just had to work through a near panic attack. My first in ages and all because of a comment a colleague made that sent my thoughts spiralling out of control.

 

Coop, I must say that I can hear strength in your posts. You are getting there, you just can't see it. you are going to be ok - better

 

Nova, do you take your frustration out on the bread dough? I'm going to make a Key Lime Pie when I get home for work colleagues - not me, I can't take the sugar.

 

Can I ask if anyone elses muscles feel semi stiff sometimes and just really sore? It's misery making