12-18 month support

[[dr...]]

Spent the morning training one snow flake to melt ... took three hours ... gonna work on another one this afternoon ... it's a start ... 

 

 

Good morning my fellow sufferers and warriors...I am okay.  I woke up with a stiff neck and it has led to a tension headache.  this doesn't bother me as much as a migraine.  It bothers me but the mental side is way better.  I stopped taking the propronolol as I just have a really hard time taking meds unless absolutely needed.  I figure I will try the Preventa Migraine concoction which has had great results from the Amazon reviews and I all of the ingredients were shown effective in double blind studies(not done by them they just combined all the minerals and vitamins in one pill).  It can take a while to work but I started last night.

 

On a funny note I was getting ready to perform last night and we have one lead character each night which is picked randomly by a high card out of a deck.  I wasn't feeling 100% so I asked if we could "fix" a low card for me(we do this occasionally).  Well...there was a screw up and I got the high card.  I was the lead and on stage straight for about 30 minutes.  I didn't die or even have a panic. 

 

on another note...I did have one bourbon after the show and any and all of my symptoms diminished greatly which shows us everything we have is realted to our lack of gaba.  I felt "normal" like when I used to have anxiety and took an extra benzo to calm me down.  I noticed my "filter" was off in what I said to people.  I realized that's how I went through the last 10 years of my life or so.  In a deep haze with the benzos lowering my inhibitions.  The big difference was that I knew this was happening with my one drink buzz but was unaware of it with banzais.  I didn't like the feeling of knowing I spent a decade like that.  Please don't tell me not to drink...I have maybe one or two drinks a week now down from lots more during benzoland. 

 

onward we go... 

 

 

[[Wo...]]

Hey Drew. What were you taking the Propronolol for? I'm curious cause I probably have to go on something for hypertension. I don't know what yet though.

 

Just curious, what kind of performing do you do? I can't imagine being on stage dealing with this crap. 

[[dr...]]

wonder-I was going to start to take it for my migraines as a preventative treatment.  I have taken it before "as needed" to help when my heart palps get bad but the idea of being on it every day didn't sit well with me.  To my dr.s credit he wasn't too enthusiastic about it.  he was much more in favor of Preventa Migraine which I am too but it can take up to three months to work.  I have been getting desperate and needed some relief but took a step back and rethought things. That attitude got me in this mess the first time.  I just started the Preventa so I will let everyone know how it works out.     

 

I do improvised theater performances.  No lines to remember

[[Gr...]]

Really considering cancelling lessons, this is really a lot. It almost feels like I am moving when I stay still, the vibrations are so strong.

 

I am not saying more, too many details don't do any good and surely do nothing to diminish it,which is what I would really like !

 

Take care, everybody. I read so many posts, remember none and now my head is mush and I don't really know what I am writing.

 

HH, thanks for sharing, it is so encouraging.

 

Sky, I don't know if you're where I am, but it is "lousy land," as Nova calls it.  not a good place at all.

[[No...]]

Drew ... sounds good ... glad you had a good evening ... good luck with the migraine supplement ... I will be curious to see how it goes for you ...

 

Got the second snow flake to melt ... going to Canadian Tire tomorrow to by a welder's torch ... this one at time thing could take all summer ... 

[[No...]]

Green ... just riding this wave today ... not dreadful ... more a damn nuisance ... looking for a better night ... sorry you are still visiting "lousy land" ...

[[Gr...]]

Green ... just riding this wave today ... not dreadful ... more a damn nuisance ... looking for a better night ... sorry you are still visiting "lousy land" ...

 

Lousy land it is.  on the couch.  pots.  diarrhea.  nausea.  flu.  freezing cold.  brain wants to go. keep trying to get up.  only to find myself plopping right back down.  and my therapist has the nerve to ask me why I need validation.  My God, what would have happened to us without this site?

 

Hope you're through the worst of it.

P.S.  It's snowing madly outside.  did you send it down from N.S.?

[[No...]]

Green ... this snow is coming from your south ... on its way to us tomorrow ...

 

This 16 - 17 -18 month stuff sure is giving us a rollicking time ... 

 

I get to start 18 months out on Monday ... hope it has a different flavour from month 17 ...

 

Have a good weekend ... hope this settles out for you ...

[[Co...]]

Hi Nova...Glad to hear that your day today is at least somewhat better than yesterday...I am hearing on the news that the snow you and Green are getting dumped on with is the last snow of your forever snow.  they said they promise.

....We are getting ready for a thunder storm...Now I have to sedate my dog....

.....I am about where you are today. My wave is lessening, but my baseline is still not back to where it was...it's about 70% as opposed to 85-90%....but I will take it because it beats the last 2 days. I am out from under the thick as night d/r and the dizzines is much better...Hoping thats the beginning of crawling back to 'better enough'...

....Are you feeling better enough to cook?...I always love to hear what's going on in your kitchen...it always sounds so good.....We're you able to get a little more rest?......I am so impressed that you are at 18 months...that's a lifetime in w/d months. ....We are following behind you Nova...you have been here for all of us for all these months . What a help you have been to us....thank you dear friend..  ..coop

[[Sk...]]

Hi everybody, I am off to bed, shortly. I don't have anything new to say, the same broken record, feel bad, I am going to bed, thankfully I am able to sleep, it's the one things that is so much better  than before my ct.

 

Heart is pounding, vibrations, la-di-da. YOu never get used to any of this, you adapt but you don't get used to it.

 

Mr Sky, prepared some lovely sweets, they smell so good and of course they are off limits. He made some bread with chocolate cream, a pie and some marmelade. Wd, has made him in such a good cook ! At least someone is getting something good out of wd !

 

Green, I read your log, sorry to hear you are in such misery.

 

GOod night everybody,

 

Sky

[[Co...]]

Sleep well Sky...Wishing you a good day tomorrow...coop

[[Co...]]

Drew, ...things sound better for you today. Happy to hear that. I really hope the Preventa kicks in. Congrats on your performance....I have also had an occasional glass of red wine and have not noticed bad effects from it. I also have a cup of half decaf/half leaded coffee every morning.  Some mornings that is the only thing that coaxes me out of bed...that and the dog.  .coffee first.. walk the dog second.

.....My wave is lifting too.  dizziness is better and d/r has lifted. Crossing my fingers. Keep feeling better Drew...Wishing you a good weekend....coop

[[Co...]]

Hey 12-18 month buddies,...if you need some encouragement this weekend read Megan's ( administrator) success story. She is a bit older like me and Nova and she writes in her story of still having many sx well into the second year and starting to get better between months 18/20.....aaaannnd ...healed...really healed at 24 months. She got ALL of her life back.  I am hanging on that story this weekend.  ..Wishing everyone a better weekend. ...coop

[[No...]]

Hi Coop ... well ... end of day Friday around here ... I suppose I am running around a 5 or 6 and the "lousy scale" ... and I posted elsewhere today, on my blog maybe, that I feel good about where I am in this process ... even though physically not so good sometimes ...

 

I know I am going to recover completely ... and all that is required of me is to "stay with the program" ... and I believe that is true for all of us ... we all take our little detours here and there ... find things useful to us ... and we all have our disappointments and discouragements ... and when all is said and done, we will all get to a full recovery ...

 

No matter how much snow is outside today, it is guaranteed to melt ... we are not scheduled for another ice age any time soon ...

 

And yes, I suffer, we all suffer ... and we all get through this ... sooner rather than later ...

 

Hoping we all have a good weekend ... 

[[Co...]]

Nova ...yep...me too ...until my next wave in which I will be about 90% convinced that not only will I never heal....but I am dying...I just have so little ability to carry my window self into my wave self. I can think it, but I can't feel it. ..Thank goodness yesterday is over and today was better. Not trusting it completely but hoping it lasts for awhile...

.....hope you can get out this weekend....coop

[[No...]]

I got out 5 times today ... 15 to 20 minutes at a time ... our big rap around parking lot is clear and I meander around ... we had full blue skies and big sunshine ... kinda cool though ... hope they get our sidewalks plowed tonight ... and will get out for a bit tomorrow morning ... then another storm hits ... not a big one and hopefully the last one for this winter ...

 

Gotta get these old bones moving ... just not  the same pacing around this building or around in a mall ... I have to be outside to thrive ... and this is the first winter in a long time that has "confined" me ...

[[Wo...]]

Hey 12-18 month buddies,...if you need some encouragement this weekend read Megan's ( administrator) success story. She is a bit older like me and Nova and she writes in her story of still having many sx well into the second year and starting to get better between months 18/20.....aaaannnd ...healed...really healed at 24 months. She got ALL of her life back.  I am hanging on that story this weekend.  ..Wishing everyone a better weekend. ...coop

 

Coop, where can I find Megan's success story? I need something right now, and my usual "go-to" stories aren't cutting it! 

[[No...]]

Wondernova ... here it is ...

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=104004.0

 

 

[[Co...]]

Thanks Nova...techno girl that I am , I still don't know how to share a link. I went to success stories and ran across hers...the link is much easier and quicker...thanks...coop

[[No...]]

Coop ... no charge 

 

Well, 9 pm around here ... gonna shut down for tonight ... have a good evening, Folks ...

[[Co...]]

Good night Nova...Sleep well.  See you tomorrow...

[[Wo...]]

Thank you both so much.

[[Ko...]]

 

Hello from Boston!

A quick check-in before I crash. I just finished up Day 2 and things are going great! I did not panic on the flights, even when landing in Boston was very bumpy because of the high winds. I had an absolutely packed day today, on the go from 8:00 this morning until 9:30 tonight, and I have had no symptoms bothering me.

 

I'm literally falling asleep as I type so I'm going to post this and get some zzzzzz. So far, so good, and I'm beyond thrilled that I decided to come!! 

 

Love to you all,

HH

 

:yippee: :clap: :clap:

 

GreenIce,

I'm so happy for you. Keep posting because you give me hope. You're at 20 & I'm at 16 so not far to go. Have fun, you earned it.

 

 

 

[[Ko...]]

Hey 12-18 month buddies,...if you need some encouragement this weekend read Megan's ( administrator) success story. She is a bit older like me and Nova and she writes in her story of still having many sx well into the second year and starting to get better between months 18/20.....aaaannnd ...healed...really healed at 24 months. She got ALL of her life back.  I am hanging on that story this weekend.  ..Wishing everyone a better weekend. ...coop

 

Thanks Coop for the tip. Also, thank you for always being supportive to one an all. Hope you get well soon.

[[mr...]]

Korbe, been thinking of you How are you feeling? I hope the pain is abating a bit for you.

 

Mrs.