Knackered Sleuths It Out with Benzos

   Hey there, Knackered here.  Knackered is on the job right now.  He’s seen a number of suspicious things going on and it’s up to him to figure it out.  Today, he’s all about private investigations. He’s all over this stuff and plans on sleuthing it out.  

   Although his work may be self serving, others need to know.  He plans on getting the secrets out.  It’s up to him.  Don’t get scared now, but he’s going in. 

   On a nearby front porch stands an unusual Halloween display.  It features a full size, standing, human skeleton accompanied by an American flag.  The problem at hand, of course, is to discover its true meaning.  Is it simply a Halloween decoration? Or is something more sinister being implied? Perhaps it’s a comment on the impending election.  Or does it convey opinions on the state of the country in general?  Knackered will need to keep a close eye on what goes on over time…which will be taken down first? Flag or skeleton.  These things matter, you know.  

    Quite recently, while pushing his cart  through the eggs and milk section, he came upon a couple overcome with exuberance.  She was running through the bakery section exclaiming to her partner, “Look what I just found!  The eggnog is already out.  And it’s the peppermint kind we like!” “Wow! he exclaims. See if you can get some JD to go home with it.”  Again, Knackered went into a querious headspace.   He has had eggnog (never peppermint), and Jack Daniel’s, but never combined.  Sounds like minted, alcoholic Pepto Bismol.  Is it an early Christmas fetish?  They were on their way to check out before he could ask.  Are they actually selling eggnog right after school starts?  

   On his way back from the airport today, yet another sign of the season rose to the keen attention of our inquisitive friend. The sky-high Casino sign along the freeway advertised their Christmas music and dining experience.  Lighted neon in the sky announced that it would be ‘Hoska Skank’.  

   Knackered knows some stuff.  Loose translation tells us that hoska is a favorite Czech Christmas bread. Skank nowadays refers to a type of Reggae dance that is a kissing cousin to punk. Put it all together and you have a riotous music group just for the holidays.   All Knackered knows is that he was sent to his bedroom when his father heard him yelling that word (skank) in the front yard.  His parents never bought the story that ‘he heard the big boys saying it behind the school bus garage’.  

   As he exited the freeway today, and moved to a slower avenue, his attention was drawn to an orange flash that sped by him in an instant.  Although he scarcely had time to capture a clear view, it was recognized as a tall figure, dressed in orange athleisure wear. He/she was atop a scooter speeding by in the left lane, at least ten miles over the speed limit. Lacking license plates and lights, Knackered wondered if it would be classified as as auto or speeding toy?  Perhaps it could have been a bird or a plane, or ????

   For now, remember that Knackered is on guard so you don’t have to be.  Feel safe, so that you can taper on friends.