Can anyone advise

[[Lo...]]

Im

scared I’m going to to be stuck on this one theme in my head for the rest of my life it doesn’t stop all day , it’s something that happened but I’m scared  , my family have said it’s not but I loop morning till night and it’s made me fear everting that may be associated with it . What if this never goes away . It fills me with regret , shame and guilt . What do I do , I really need help 

[[Cr...]]

54 minutes ago, [[L...] said:

Im

scared I’m going to to be stuck on this one theme in my head for the rest of my life it doesn’t stop all day , it’s something that happened but I’m scared  , my family have said it’s not but I loop morning till night and it’s made me fear everting that may be associated with it . What if this never goes away . It fills me with regret , shame and guilt . What do I do , I really need help 

Even if the symptoms are primarily due to withdrawal, you may still find cbt or other coping mechanisms useful in helping you not react to your own thoughts so strongly.

There is not one word, sentence, or paragraph that any member here can type that will get rid of this thought for you. You will need to put the effort in at retraining your brain.

If you learn best with face to face instruction then a well-trained therapist or psychologist may be able to help. You don't even need to bring up benzo withdrawal. You may not even need to bring up the content of your looping thoughts. 

If this thought is a past regret, no amount of worrying will change the past. If it is about something that might happen in the future, worrying nonstop is not going to prevent it.

If the thought is something that actually needs to be addressed headon to overcome your obsession with it, then once again you really should consider giving a therapy a shot.

Otherwise, if disclosing the thought is not something you are comfortable with then please give cbt and guided meditations a try. Things take time, so do not think those things aren't helping until you have at least given them several weeks or even months.

[[Lo...]]

@[Cr...] it is a past regret and a future worry . And it’s something that everyone if telling me didn’t even happen so I have no certainty , it’s so frightening and it’s there 24/7 morning till night and triggered so many things associated with it , I can’t live with this the rest of my life . I don’t know what to do . I have booked a therapist , I just wondered if a withdrawal symptom as I never had this before then therapy doesn’t work , what the hell do I do 

[[Cr...]]

13 minutes ago, [[L...] said:

I just wondered if a withdrawal symptom as I never had this before then therapy doesn’t work , what the hell do I do 

It can be both a wd symptom and a natural anxiety symptom. Say that someone secretly poisoned their little sister's pet hamster growing up. It may be something they 'kinda' regret, but otherwise don't think about. Then benzo withdrawal comes where they are hypersensitive to their emotions. Now that dead hamster is probably tormenting the person in WD with constant images of the sister crying, the burial in the backyard, the person repeatedly denying involvement.

If the person could only just finally recover from benzo wd then fear of that thought would probably subside without even coming clean to the sister. Of course if they did address the thought and talked it out with the sister (aka therapy), that might help ease the fear and regret, even if withdrawal is still very intense.

It may feel like you are losing your mind since you can't control your thoughts. And that is normal when WD causes severe anxiety which in turn causes rumination, which finally makes one feel like they are going insane.

The more you fear the thought, the more your brain will keep bringing it up in an attempt to get you to find a solution to the perceived threat. If there is no solution, then all you can do is convince the brain over time that the thought is not solvable and thus unimportant. Allow the thought to exist in your head, maybe even say Hi to it when it comes. If it's going to be stubborn and stick around, you may only be able to get it to leave by making your brain bored of its presence (which is not giving fearful responses anymore).

Worrying about therapy not working is kind of moot since worrying about the thought hasn't been working this whole time so far, right?

[[Lo...]]

@[Cr...]Yes your right as I had past events I had never thought about all resurface in withdrawal, even things I was happy with suddenly I question the motive and so on , this recent trigger has been here 7 weeks and it’s the worst , the trigger before it I thought was the worst but it wasn’t . The strangest thing is the trigger before it I was triggered by everything associated with it too and my best friend I thought I would never feel the same around her ever again and when this new awful trigger came along suddenly the previous one was gone just like that and I feel fine around my best friend again , I can’t understand it , this new one is the pitts of hell and it left me being triggered taking my kids to school and everything associated with it and my family keep saying nothing has happened but to me it’s so so bad. The thing is if I try to act as if I’m not bothered by the thought or carry on with it there it can get stronger and says to me your just ignoring seriousness of this etc etc , I have like a agitation and electrical feeling all through my body and bones too as well as constant flashbacks of my life 

Edited Tuesday at 21:12 by [Lo...]

[[Lo...]]

@[Cr...] How do we not give fearful responses ? 

Edited Tuesday at 21:13 by [Lo...]

[[Lo...]]

1 hour ago, [[C...] said:

Even if the symptoms are primarily due to withdrawal, you may still find cbt or other coping mechanisms useful in helping you not react to your own thoughts so strongly.

There is not one word, sentence, or paragraph that any member here can type that will get rid of this thought for you. You will need to put the effort in at retraining your brain.

If you learn best with face to face instruction then a well-trained therapist or psychologist may be able to help. You don't even need to bring up benzo withdrawal. You may not even need to bring up the content of your looping thoughts. 

If this thought is a past regret, no amount of worrying will change the past. If it is about something that might happen in the future, worrying nonstop is not going to prevent it.

If the thought is something that actually needs to be addressed headon to overcome your obsession with it, then once again you really should consider giving a therapy a shot.

Otherwise, if disclosing the thought is not something you are comfortable with then please give cbt and guided meditations a try. Things take time, so do not think those things aren't helping until you have at least given them several weeks or even months.

 

[[Cr...]]

2 hours ago, [[L...] said:

@[Cr...] How do we not give fearful responses ? 

Right now fear is going to be your default response to this thought for awhile. Fear has been so prevalent that it probably feels innate. It will take some time to mentally train your brain to stop caring about this thought. I bet you even feel those scary adrenaline rushes/surges from your gut whenever the thought comes. That is the brains trained response.

Again, don't focus on preventing the thought. That is unimportant if not impossible. As a little thought experiment.. for the next 15 seconds, do not think of rainbow cats meowing.

....

....

It was probably impossible. That is why you don't want to to force yourself to stop thinking about your scary thought. Allow it to occur, acknowledge it is there, and slowly grow used to its presence. Over time you will feel less and less threatened whenever the thought comes up.

It can take practice, so don't be disappointed if you still feel fear for awhile when thinking about these thoughts. When you go to your therapist, don't judge the results based on 1, or even a couple, appointments.

[[Br...]]

2 hours ago, [[L...] said:

I just wondered if a withdrawal symptom as I never had this before then therapy doesn’t work , what the hell do I do 

When I was in the thick of recovering from benzos I was plagued with intrusive memories and intense rumination that blew regrets completely out of proportion.  This is very much a withdrawal symptom.  As your brain readjusts after benzo these looping thoughts, memories and self recrimination will very likely ease up and you will gradually begin to experience equilibrium again.  

One of the lies our brains tell us in withdrawal is that our current reality will be our reality forever.  This piece helps to reassure you that this is not the case: Benzo Lies That Have Been Busted.

In my own experience, meditation helped me to some extent to shift my focus away from intrusive thoughts and other symptoms.  Daily moderate exercise supported a greater sense of well-being, helped discharge anxious, uneasy energy and provided much needed distraction.  I almost always returned from walking in nature with a more hopeful sense about the future.  These things can help make you a bit less miserable but it is the passage of time that truly brings healing.  

 

[[Lo...]]

@[Cr...] how do you stop fearing the thoughts of the out come to my situation I’m ruminating on  is so frightening ? 

[[S_...]]

@[Lo...] me too I have the same constantly looping everyday 

[[S_...]]

It also feels like I cannot use the logic part of my brain anymore. Like no matter what logic I tell my brain it won't stop looping on a specific thought and keeps repeating over over filling me with guilt and regret 

[[Lo...]]

@[S_...] I can’t use the logic part either no matter how many times I tell my brain this isn’t the truth it doesn’t stop and it makes me feel awful inside like these inner feelings in my body and I have extreme regret and guilt 

im worried its keeping me stuck in withdrawal 

[[be...]]

I feel like my life is over. This thing in my head is torturing me. I wonder if it is electricity or glutamate surge or what... I AM DYING.. PLEASE!!!!!

[[S_...]]

@[be...] I'm sorry your going through this I know how painful it is please stay strong it will pass I promise. I know its hard to believe right now because your in the thick of it . You can message me if you like to talk anytime 

[[Lo...]]

I eel like I’m dying too with the thoughts , I feel totally disabled over them 😞