A Moment of Clarity and then Rebound

[[Th...]]

Hey gang,

It’s been a minute, but I have to pick your brain.

for a minute there, I thought I was in the clear. I had almost 8 weeks symptom free of the withdrawals, and then suddenly last week,…BAM!

Mid-conversation with a coworker, I got zapped in the brain. At first I thought it had something to do with the heat, but the otherworldly sensation I felt reminded me that it was the withdrawal coming back to play.

The next day I took a walk, and got hit by palpitations, an almost black-out spell, and a series of brain-zaps lasting throughout the day.

I tried the gym afterwards, which has been a great source of relief, but I again got hit by a series of palpitations that scared me into leaving. The first walk-away I’ve ever done at the gym.

All this week has been much of the same, with symptoms coming and going all day long while at work, and today (my day off), it’s damn near impossible to get out of bed. My shoulders ache, my legs won’t stop, fists with my toes into the carpet, and awaiting the worst.

Is this level of rebound common, or is it just a crude reminder that recovery is ongoing?

Your thoughts are appreciated.

Side note; I went to my PCP for a follow up the other day (the same one who started me on Lorazepam) and he attempted to give me another prescription for it, which I turned down. He now wants to book me for a CT scan for my description of the brain zaps to see if all is well.

What a sh*t-show this drug causes!

[[jo...]]

It sounds like you had I great window and were slamed by a wave. I know how that feels. It's deflating beyond words. Like all the other waves this one will pass too, And then hopefully you'll be done with this shit. 

[[Pa...]]

Hi @[Th...], it looks like you quit cold turkey in January of this year?  If that's the case, I'm not surprised you're still dealing with symptoms but I know its discouraging to get hit after such a long window.  

Sometimes we can figure out why, other times, we have to chalk it up to the mysteries of the drug.  Good for you for turning down more medication, if what you're feeling is benzodiazepine related, then that would unnecessarily complicate things. 

Just for my own curiosity, have you taken any new medication lately, oral or topical steroids?  Any new supplements or antibiotics?  Have you faced any added stress lately? I enjoy trying to find the culprit but like I mentioned, its not always possible. 

[[Th...]]

1 hour ago, [[j...] said:

It sounds like you had I great window and were slamed by a wave. I know how that feels. It's deflating beyond words. Like all the other waves this one will pass too, And then hopefully you'll be done with this shit. 

Very much so, my friend. Feels like a thousand steps backwards, but I won’t quit. I appreciate your encouraging words. I hope you have relief in your journey as well.

[[Th...]]

55 minutes ago, [[P...] said:

Hi @[Th...], it looks like you quit cold turkey in January of this year?  If that's the case, I'm not surprised you're still dealing with symptoms but I know its discouraging to get hit after such a long window.  

Sometimes we can figure out why, other times, we have to chalk it up to the mysteries of the drug.  Good for you for turning down more medication, if what you're feeling is benzodiazepine related, then that would unnecessarily complicate things. 

Just for my own curiosity, have you taken any new medication lately, oral or topical steroids?  Any new supplements or antibiotics?  Have you faced any added stress lately? I enjoy trying to find the culprit but like I mentioned, its not always possible. 

Very discouraging, indeed. I’ve read a lot about “waves” in the last hour, and that seems to be the case based on my current understanding.

I did quit cold turkey in January, which upon discovering this forum, is definitely not recommended. As I think about it now, I wish I hadn’t done it that way, but I am where I am and no matter what I’m feeling, I will not return to that god awful medication. 

As for supplements, I take 5mg of Creatine for my workouts, Omega 3-6-9’s, B1, Vitamin D and an occasional 50mg CBD capsule with zero THC content. I honestly thought this combo had everything to do with my “clarity window,” shall we say. Only to get hit with this wave and feel like I’m back at the beginning once again.

Frustrating, is definitely an understatement. Though I must admit, it was a bit foolish of me to think I’d be an exception after only such a short period of recovery time.

[[Th...]]

I forgot to mention, I haven’t introduced anything new in terms of supplements. What I’ve mentioned is all I’ve taken since starting my recovery.

[[Pa...]]

Your supplements look fairly benign so I'm afraid we're not going to be able to figure out why you've been hit so hard, but the good news is, you've had an amazing window that has allowed you to feel good, and to know your body is capable of recovery.  You got a peek at your future and that's more than others have been able to experience so early in recovery. 

Best advice I can give you is to keep living a healthy life and try not to worry these symptoms mean anything, they're just the random stuff we deal with as we recover. 

[[Th...]]

18 minutes ago, [[P...] said:

Your supplements look fairly benign so I'm afraid we're not going to be able to figure out why you've been hit so hard, but the good news is, you've had an amazing window that has allowed you to feel good, and to know your body is capable of recovery.  You got a peek at your future and that's more than others have been able to experience so early in recovery. 

Best advice I can give you is to keep living a healthy life and try not to worry these symptoms mean anything, they're just the random stuff we deal with as we recover. 

Thank you, Pamster. To know that I can get better is a good sign. And even though there are setbacks, we must keep pushing forward.

Today might be terrifying, but I’m keeping in mind that won’t always be the case.

I appreciate your kind words.

[[vo...]]

@[Th...] I hope you can get back to the gym soon. I know for me, it is the one place I feel my symptoms seem to give me a break.

[[Th...]]

49 minutes ago, [[v...] said:

@[Th...] I hope you can get back to the gym soon. I know for me, it is the one place I feel my symptoms seem to give me a break.

As do I. Agreed, it’s also my place of respite through all this. The fact that I had a panic attack in the middle of pull-ups (my favourite exercise) the other day, is a terrible feeling. It’s the first time I had to leave the gym like that. 
 

I suppose it would be best to give myself a couple of days before I attempt going back. That is, of course, if the anxiety rush has subsided by then.

[[Si...]]

Perhaps it might be best to focus on more gentle exercise for a while, like swimming and walking, that doesn't rev you up...

[[fa...]]

On 14/05/2024 at 10:11, [[R...] said:

I’ve also been given low dose birth control to use continually (without a break for my periods) in hopes of avoiding these horrible symptoms that ramp up during my cycle.

Like you, I’m too afraid to start but I’m also becoming desperate!  I’m 10 months off, so no longer tapering, but I feel your pain (literally). 

 

16 hours ago, [[T...] said:

Very discouraging, indeed. I’ve read a lot about “waves” in the last hour, and that seems to be the case based on my current understanding.

I did quit cold turkey in January, which upon discovering this forum, is definitely not recommended. As I think about it now, I wish I hadn’t done it that way, but I am where I am and no matter what I’m feeling, I will not return to that god awful medication. 

As for supplements, I take 5mg of Creatine for my workouts, Omega 3-6-9’s, B1, Vitamin D and an occasional 50mg CBD capsule with zero THC content. I honestly thought this combo had everything to do with my “clarity window,” shall we say. Only to get hit with this wave and feel like I’m back at the beginning once again.

Frustrating, is definitely an understatement. Though I must admit, it was a bit foolish of me to think I’d be an exception after only such a short period of recovery time.

If I take anything like vitamin c or fish oil or vitamin B I have an increase in symptoms. Could it be a supplement 

[[Th...]]

21 minutes ago, [[S...] said:

Perhaps it might be best to focus on more gentle exercise for a while, like swimming and walking, that doesn't rev you up...

Agreed. I was thinking the same. I took an extremely slow paced walk in the sun yesterday, and it did feel great.

[[Th...]]

20 minutes ago, [[f...] said:

If I take anything like vitamin c or fish oil or vitamin B I have an increase in symptoms. Could it be a supplement 

Perhaps I’ll take a break from a few of the supplements I take and see what happens. I’m willing to give anything a shot at this point. Anything except more benzos, of course.