3+ weeks off of Clonazepam

[[Cr...]]

7 hours ago, [[i...] said:

Could it be the coffee?! Right now I'm drinking two cups/day. One in the morning (obviously) and on at 5PM-ish. The second one makes me feel ok though.

The fact that the second cup doesn't bother you as much may indicate that you are dealing with too much cortisol in the morning. Try cutting out your morning cup for a few days and see if anything improves.

[[in...]]

Just now, [[C...] said:

The fact that the second cup doesn't bother you as much may indicate that you are dealing with too much cortisol in the morning. Try cutting out your morning cup for a few days and see if anything improves.

Sir. Yes sir! I'll give it a go tomorrow morning! Thanks 💯🙏 

[[Cr...]]

5 minutes ago, [[i...] said:

Sir. Yes sir! I'll give it a go tomorrow morning! Thanks 💯🙏 

Lol that wasn't a command, it was more of a suggestion. I am not your drill sergeant. If you wanna go that route then give me 20 pushups tomorrow morning in place of the coffee.

[[in...]]

1 minute ago, [[C...] said:

Lol that wasn't a command, it was more of a suggestion. I am not your drill sergeant. If you wanna go that route then give me 20 pushups tomorrow morning in place of the coffee.

The "Sir. Yes sir" was just something I wrote, kind of saying "I'll basically do anything at this point" lol. I'm just fed up with the whole situation haha

[[in...]]

7 hours ago, [[i...] said:

It's insane how this little pill affects us. I would've never thought in my wildest dreams that the road back to normal could be this rough. I was expecting a couple of days (maybe a week) of fatigue, but not this. I'm never going down that path again. It's the same as with alcohol: It's just not worth it.

Day 9 is over. This day has been loaded with cortisol. Still I want to take the time to thank you guys for the support today! Everything from what to eat to exercising. All your tips are much appreciated! Take care y'all! Peace✌️ 

Edited June 16 by [in...]

[[Pa...]]

You've got a great attitude @[in...]!  

You mentioned you could only go outside for 10 minutes, is this because of fear?  

[[in...]]

9 hours ago, [[P...] said:

You've got a great attitude @[in...]!  

You mentioned you could only go outside for 10 minutes, is this because of fear?  

Yes. It's because of fear. I can't relax when I'm outside.

[[in...]]

16 hours ago, [[C...] said:

The fact that the second cup doesn't bother you as much may indicate that you are dealing with too much cortisol in the morning. Try cutting out your morning cup for a few days and see if anything improves.

Day 10:

I tried waiting 15-20 minutes after waking up before I drank my coffee, and the adrenaline rush decreased by at least 50%. The way I did it earlier was I woke up and went straight for the coffee machine. Thanks so much! This tip worked really well! 💯🙏

Edited June 17 by [in...]

[[De...]]

Will you skip morning coffee from now? You see how everybody are diferent, What works for me doesnt have to work for you! Its always good to listen to your body And find out What is working best for you!
I am waiting more answers for fear, because I had same problem in begining And was wondering why I have that strange fear without any logical reason. I had that feeling of  fear even when i was in my room, in bed. 

[[in...]]

1 hour ago, [[D...] said:

Will you skip morning coffee from now? You see how everybody are diferent, What works for me doesnt have to work for you! Its always good to listen to your body And find out What is working best for you!
I am waiting more answers for fear, because I had same problem in begining And was wondering why I have that strange fear without any logical reason. I had that feeling of  fear even when i was in my room, in bed. 

Have your fears disappeard? If so. What did you do? When did they go away?

[[or...]]

2 minutes ago, [[i...] said:

Have your fears disappeard? If so. What did you do? When did they go away?

I heard something yesterday that had such an affect on me, maybe it will hit you in a positive way as well.  They said that having courage is not a lack of fear, we all fear.  Courage is about standing up to our fears, facing them head on.

For me, the flight part of "fight or flight" isn't an option when it comes to these drugs.  I just don't see any other option than to just face it all, to overcome my fears, whatever they are, oregonlady PS I should have a treasure-chest full of frequent-flier-miles since I spent at least 35 years in "flight"

[[De...]]

I had diferent kinds of fear during past few months And they are now gone! I can go out, drive car, be around people, i can be alone in my house, I can sleep alone. Now i don’t have problem but still don’t understand why I had that fears in First place. Like my body is in state of fear And my mind cant understand reason for fear. Like i didnt feel safe at all. No matter What i do. I see everyone have that. 🫤 i find it very itacional🫤

I hated that diference between my mind And body. My mind say one thing And my body react oposite. I expirienced this only during wd. 

[[in...]]

3 minutes ago, [[D...] said:

I had diferent kinds of fear during past few months And they are now gone! I can go out, drive car, be around people, i can be alone in my house, I can sleep alone. Now i don’t have problem but still don’t understand why I had that fears in First place. Like my body is in state of fear And my mind cant understand reason for fear. Like i didnt feel safe at all. No matter What i do. I see everyone have that. 🫤 i find it very itacional🫤

I hated that diference between my mind And body. My mind say one thing And my body react oposite. I expirienced this only during wd. 

Me personally well I react exactly like that even though I'm 10 days out. I wonder if it will ever disappear.

[[in...]]

24 minutes ago, [[o...] said:

I heard something yesterday that had such an affect on me, maybe it will hit you in a positive way as well.  They said that having courage is not a lack of fear, we all fear.  Courage is about standing up to our fears, facing them head on.

For me, the flight part of "fight or flight" isn't an option when it comes to these drugs.  I just don't see any other option than to just face it all, to overcome my fears, whatever they are, oregonlady PS I should have a treasure-chest full of frequent-flier-miles since I spent at least 35 years in "flight"

So I just need to tell myself that there's no point in being afraid?

[[or...]]

You're just getting "out of the gate"   I remember feeling the same about just wanting it to be over, but I've found that gradually I've adapted to my wd sxs.  Don't panic hearing that though, because I found that things were so much better, coping better with all sxs I may have.

I hope, and even believe, I'm headed for more quality of life with every step I take.  It's always the worst just before a window for me.  Strange to think feeling really bad is a sign of a window on the way oregonlady

[[or...]]

5 minutes ago, [[i...] said:

So I just need to tell myself that there's no point in being afraid?

I don't think that ever did me any good.  I think "don't be afraid" is a stupid thing to say.  Hope no one gets offended if they say that. I just think "fear" is normal, especially in our predicament, OL

Edited June 17 by [or...]

[[in...]]

5 minutes ago, [[o...] said:

You're just getting "out of the gate"   I remember feeling the same about just wanting it to be over, but I've found that gradually I've adapted to my wd sxs.  Don't panic hearing that though, because I found that things were so much better, coping better with all sxs I may have.

I hope, and even believe, I'm headed for more quality of life with every step I take.  It's always the worst just before a window for me.  Strange to think feeling really bad is a sign of a window on the way oregonlady

I can't wait for those windows! I know they'll come. It just feels like forever until it actually happens lol

[[or...]]

1 minute ago, [[i...] said:

I can't wait for those windows! I know they'll come. It just feels like forever until it actually happens lol

Have you thought about distractions to take your mind off your sxs, as best you can I mean.  That is what I've had to learn, as focusing on my sxs every day just made things worse for me, OL

[[in...]]

30 minutes ago, [[D...] said:

I had diferent kinds of fear during past few months And they are now gone! I can go out, drive car, be around people, i can be alone in my house, I can sleep alone. Now i don’t have problem but still don’t understand why I had that fears in First place. Like my body is in state of fear And my mind cant understand reason for fear. Like i didnt feel safe at all. No matter What i do. I see everyone have that. 🫤 i find it very itacional🫤

I hated that diference between my mind And body. My mind say one thing And my body react oposite. I expirienced this only during wd. 

That's exactly what I feel is happening as well! My mind tells me "let's do this" and "let's do that" but my body's telling me "let's.... not!!". I really want to go outside to experience summer. Oh well. It is what it is!

Edited June 17 by [in...]

[[in...]]

1 minute ago, [[o...] said:

Have you thought about distractions to take your mind off your sxs, as best you can I mean.  That is what I've had to learn, as focusing on my sxs every day just made things worse for me, OL

Distractions for me are basically food, sex, snacks or a really good movie/interview. In a way it feels like I'm running away from my problems doing these things, but maybe that's ok for now. Since my mind/body's repairing itself. I'll deal with these things later on.

[[or...]]

Just now, [[i...] said:

That's exactly what I feel is happening as well! My mind tells me "let's do this" and let's do that" but my body's telling "let's.... not!!". I really want to go outside to experience summer. Oh well. It is what it is!

I have to reply to this one too because I have to do certain things, and going out into the fresh air, just outside my apt. building, is enough. One foot in front of the other works for me, kind of like "auto pilot".  I really can't believe the things I can manage to do.

Other times, I just do nothing and those are the worst days of all for me. I think I go into a survival mode because.  I've seen enough "survivors" to believe it can work for me as well I also rely a lot on my faith, I should never leave that out. 

[[or...]]

3 minutes ago, [[i...] said:

Distractions for me are basically food, sex, snacks or a really good movie/interview. In a way it feels like I'm running away from my problems doing these things, but maybe that's ok for now. Since my mind/body's repairing itself. I'll deal with these things later on.

Whatever gets your mind off your sxs (within the law of course ) sounds ok to me.  I don't call it "running away" or being in denial either, just plain "survival" OL

[[in...]]

3 minutes ago, [[o...] said:

I have to reply to this one too because I have to do certain things, and going out into the fresh air, just outside my apt. building, is enough. One foot in front of the other works for me, kind of like "auto pilot".  I really can't believe the things I can manage to do.

Other times, I just do nothing and those are the worst days of all for me. I think I go into a survival mode because.  I've seen enough "survivors" to believe it can work for me as well I also rely a lot on my faith, I should never leave that out. 

That sounds awesome! Yeah.. I often compare my situation to those who have it worse! In the end it's about setting your mind to it! Just convincing oneself that "I'll be fine! No rush!" It usually goes better than expected.

[[or...]]

Just now, [[i...] said:

That sounds awesome! Yeah.. I often compare my situation to those who have it worse! In the end it's about setting your mind to it! Just convincing oneself that "I'll be fine! No rush!" It usually goes better than expected.

Something that happens for me, sort of like an "auto pilot mode" I mentioned, is if the thought of doing something happens, I don't think any further than that, I just do it. Thinking can be a deterent to me doing anything at all, just staying in my chair or bed can be the worst thing.  When you think about going outside, throw something on and do it, don't think about it until you just end up sitting there.

At least that's how it works for me.  Even cleaning up the dishes, or taking a shower gets me in the mood to do more

[[in...]]

I'm an expert when it comes to overthinking. I have too much spare time on my hands 😅.

You're so right: It should be more like "just do it" instead of "I wonder if..., maybe..., what if..." and so forth.

Edited June 17 by [in...]