When will it end? Anyone tempted to reinstate?

[[Gr...]]

4 hours ago, [[P...] said:

This is one possible method for reducing your dose, crushing and weighing your dose using jewelers scales are another.  If you’re considering reinstating you’ll want to research possible methods for tapering. 

@[Pa...] I am unsure what to do. I want to get this system stable. Wish I had crystal ball. I think I can get through the intermittent things (doesn't mean they don't hurt, though I had rough day today). This constant pain shooting through forehead, is what I need to go away. I can't sleep. I think it's connected to this maybe-infection which I'm waiting for some relief. What if turns out it's not infection, that's when I wonder if settling my system will be key if it can even be done. ugh. I am so blind in all of this. 

[[Gr...]]

Oh, @[An...] Wish I could sleep. Pain intense. No sign yet of clearing up. Concerned it's WD. I don't want that.

[[Gr...]]

@[An...] Concerned this episode I'm having is nerve damage from WD and senses are messed up. I hope it realky is infection and I need more time and maybe a new medication. ENT seemed to know right away from my symptoms. Swelling & headache were consistent with diagnosis. What is the deal with this frigging swelling?  Losing patience. Heve to sleep, sharp pain keeping me up. 

Edited October 18, 2023 by [Gr...]
correction

[[Gr...]]

This is a cruel joke. There is no improvement. I did not sleep again, 3 nights. Now I'm light-headed and shaky. I am disfigured. This is not how I look. I can't even look in the mirror. I cry. How did this happen?  It has to be WD. I honestly don't see it going back to normal. Constant pain with throbbing and numbness on outside. I can't deal with this. I've turned into a recluse like many others. This getting best of me. I don't like my husband looking at me. Why? I don't understand. I am drained emotionally. Something maybe only if you experience this would know. I am beside myself. please help me God. 

I'm only here bc of my dogs. 

Edited October 18, 2023 by [Gr...]
addition

[[An...]]

Grace, when do you followup with the ENT? You probably don't look as bad as you think you do when you look in the mirror. What does your husband say? If you could get the swelling and the other things going on with your nose cleared up, could you endure all the other SXs for a while until things start to abate?

[[me...]]

Hi grace2023 

Doesn't sound that you are much better..I've got a sinus and eye infection I don't feel well...

 

I'm trying not to look backto how I was because I get more anxious I've lost so many years I'm looking forward to some sort of normality however small.

I hope you manage some sleep tonight look after yourself🙏❣️

[[Gr...]]

@[An...] My husband says I'm swollen. He normally would not say anything like that. If I didn't have this  crap WD thing going on, it would be an ordinary day. Hard to tell if 2 things going on at same time bc I am burning, numb & tingling all over and I know what that is from. pain still shooting through up forehead with bad headache as I mentioned. If it would just let up to let me sleep. Waiting for ENT what he says. This WD is clouds things

[[Gr...]]

@[An...] I'm so close to getting through this acute, aren't I? Trying sooo hard to trudge through WD. Gets best of me. I want to get real close to being over the worst. From what I understand, acute can be real bad and gets better?  Waiting for that. Hope not much longer. I have to be functional. Too much time is passing.

[[An...]]

30 minutes ago, [[G...] said:

@[An...] I'm so close to getting through this acute, aren't I? Trying sooo hard to trudge through WD. Gets best of me. I want to get real close to being over the worst. From what I understand, acute can be real bad and gets better?  Waiting for that. Hope not much longer. I have to be functional. Too much time is passing.

I think so Grace. How close are you to 3 months off now?

[[Gr...]]

@[An...] Aug 14 last X. Sept 13 last Amb.   

Pressure is bad, headache back. Clockwork at nighttime. I push on bridge and I can feel it. I feel it swelling. Has to be ENT. 

There has to be a way to get better faster. Too hard for me. I am trying hard to resist urge for a Xanax. Every day I feel like I'm not me. Like I can't enjoy me. I don't know how to do this. I hope I make it. Nights are really bad. I am stuck. I want it like before. Before I stopped? I liked me then. Before I started? I liked me better. That leaves me with someone I don't recognize. How can I move forward?  . Distraction works only a few hours. I miss my life and me. 

Help. I am scared

Edited October 19, 2023 by [Gr...]
typo

[[Gr...]]

Chills. Burning ears, face. This is cruel. Do I have my age against me?

[[Gr...]]

@[Pa...] I know you sent me the info abou Valium. @[Pa...] I am very scared how I am physically feeling. I go back & forth with the Valium idea. I am so against having any of those in my system, but I am wondering if it would at all, settle my system -- physically and mentally. I am unsure how much longer I can withstand these symptoms, yet I don't want new ones either with or without Valium. I think my age is against me. I want the nerve system to feel calm. I would taper off the Valium at another time, cross that bridge later. For now, I don't know anymore what to do. I have come this far, 9 wks Xanax and 5 Amb, but I feel horrible. I didn't find posts about Valium experiences after withdrawal. I don't know much about the med. I am so scared Pamster. I still would need someone to give me Valium. This is so frightening for me. I am afraid of what's goung on internally. I really thought in the beginning that it would be easier. I know there is no concrete answer, but any ideas what Valium would make me feel like at this stage? Do you remember anyone in the past takingvit after a few month withdrawal and finding some relief? I feel so alone on this. Everything has been on hold. This has taken me to an empty place I never expected. Thanks

[[Pa...]]

I don’t recall recommending Valium to you @[Gr...], I don’t have experience with it, my hope is you’ll stay benzo free.  But this is your life and your decision and we’ll support whatever you decide to do. 

I do recommend making a decision because indecision is very stressful and can make our symptoms worse so I hope you can figure out what you need to do.

[[Gr...]]

@[Pa...] No, you did not recommend. Sorry, I should have been more clear or sent the link. You only sent me dosing info which was just info only. Oh, thought you may have seen posts if people had done that. My goal was to be benzo free, but I feel like this process is doing strange things to me and I may have been able to do better had I gone to Valium. Thank you

[[Gr...]]

@[An...] I am back on the maybe try Valium train. If you can hold steady all these years with 5mg, maybe I can get away with 2.5mg. I can't take this WD. Again, shooting pain from nose to forehead. I smile and pain is worse  unbelievable. What is causing this? This infection that I hope it is and is getting better. Nothing on site mentions anything like this except my crazy posts. Would Valium cure my ails? Most likely not this or all, but maybe some. It would most likely help me sleep. Hard enough with latest burning again, but come on, 24/7 pain shoved in my face. This headache that goes with it. Sorry to vent. I'm petrified I have to live with this. I have to get through.

 

[[Gr...]]

@[An...] This is ridiculous. WD has crushed me. I can't believe the things it does to us. Add my oddity to the list.

I am running out of choices by the way I am feeling. I dread this, but aI have to try something. I am in agony and I really think the WD is causing this.

i am getting 4mg day Valium. My ENT says I have inflammation not necessarily cellulitis. I am numb there yet I have excruciating pain. My left side is numb and I feel the pressure-pain coming from that side. It comes on at anytime. I am hoping I can get some kind of relief with the CNS. It's probably a long shot, but I am very uncomfortable and in distress. It's such an odd place that I can't do anything aboutcit.  I am so tired of this. I hope I can keep pain off today. It's already shooting in my head.

I read something about stress and this sinonasal thing

It speaks of stressors, something about connection with sinonasal problems. It's a long article. Nevertheless, I cannot be functional the way I am. I not happy I have to make these choices.  

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6028164/

 

[[Gr...]]

I am in unbearable pain and I am certain WD is cause or set something off, causing this. I've decided to try Valium 4mg a day. I don't know anymore what to do. Learning all about the CNS affected by WD, I want to try and see if this will calm my system for a few months. I have no plan to stay on it. I will taper after the new year and do it very slow. Will this stop my current pain? I don't know, but I hope it helps somewhat and doesn't cause new problems. I am very desperate. 

[[Pa...]]

It’s good to see you’ve made a decision, I hope it provides some relief. 

[[Gr...]]

@[Pa...] I am hesitant. May wait. Not too excied about. It's back-up plan. 

[[An...]]

10 hours ago, [[G...] said:

I am in unbearable pain and I am certain WD is cause or set something off, causing this. I've decided to try Valium 4mg a day. I don't know anymore what to do. Learning all about the CNS affected by WD, I want to try and see if this will calm my system for a few months. I have no plan to stay on it. I will taper after the new year and do it very slow. Will this stop my current pain? I don't know, but I hope it helps somewhat and doesn't cause new problems. I am very desperate. 

Fingers crossed Grace........🤞 I know you have endured intolerable pain and discomfort over 2 months. Sometimes, we have to retreat and return to fight another day.

[[Gr...]]

@[An...] Thank you. I know there are people with worse and incworse situations. Maybe they were on for decades. I don't want to minimize their pain and experience. I can only express how rotten it gets for me. I need to get back to reality and my physocal being. For now, not for long, V seemed like something to try.

[[Gr...]]

This med and WD has messed me up bad. So much pressure in my face and a headache today. I don't get it. Strange things I have going on are putting me in a bad place. I am in disbelief of what is happening all because I stopped taking a medication. This is not real. Please make it stop. 

[[Gr...]]

@[An...] I took 2mg V earlier and I am knocked out. I don't know how you did 25mg? I can barely get through 2. I have headache & trouble breathing. I may stay at 2 for now. My day has been shot.  I have to get things done but I am exhausted.

I am still swollen & numb, not that V was going to fix that, I was hoping it would stop numbing. Discouraged the numbness could be nerve damage from WD. Please, this can't be so. Why is this going on? So bizarre.  

[[Ch...]]

Are your symptoms better 

[[An...]]

7 hours ago, [[G...] said:

@[An...] I took 2mg V earlier and I am knocked out. I don't know how you did 25mg? I can barely get through 2. I have headache & trouble breathing. I may stay at 2 for now. My day has been shot.  I have to get things done but I am exhausted.

I am still swollen & numb, not that V was going to fix that, I was hoping it would stop numbing. Discouraged the numbness could be nerve damage from WD. Please, this can't be so. Why is this going on? So bizarre.  

I think I did 20 mgs Grace after I was discharged from detox but just for a little while to get some into my system as fast as possible bc I was in really bad shape. I quickly came down to 5 mgs and that is where I stayed.