Found someone with benzo experience but appt is 2 wks out. Should I do it?

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Hello again, 

Found a practitioner who supposedly (no disrespect intended) knows about benzos and will allow discussion of options. Appt is 2 wks out unless something opens up - should I stick to not reinstating until then? Current Dr will be calling Monday to check if followed plan of reinstating w/ no taper and I don’t know what to say. Mom is extremely upset I’m not reinstantiating - don’t blame her I stupidly went cold turkey around 20 days ago. 
 

What if the new practitioner also gives a concerning suggestion? Driving myself crazy about what to do. 
 

thanks again 

[[Fa...]]

@[sc...]  May I ask you what you would like to do?  I know someone will come on who has CT experience and can advise you better than I.  But, first…do you know what you would like to do in terms of moving forward/medication?

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Hi @[Fa...]. Honestly I’m not sure. I just want to do the safest thing with the least risk. It seems 50/50 regarding people’s suggestions - some say get back on & taper. Some say don’t get back on at all. So far nobody’s said get back on & don't taper which is what my Dr is suggesting. 
 

If my Dr would allow a taper at a safe pace I’d maybe do it. I’ve just heard this  can be brutal and I don’t know the difference between that and straight up never using them again. I’ve also heard cross tapering w Valium is an option but I don’t know how that works and I’m terrified to use another med. 
 

A large part of me wants to never touch them again but I don’t know how that would affect the severe anxiety/panic they were suppressing. 
 

Thanks - Sarah 

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I backed myself into a corner and I’m not sure how (or if I can) get out. 

[[or...]]

I think @[Fa...], if I'm understanding her correctly, is making a very good point.  This is about your life, and it has to be your decision.  You're going to get conflicting views, especially the more people you listen to.  You have to weed it out and choose for yourself.  I'm speaking from experience, if I have learned anything in my life, the most important is that it's my decision which road I choose, or chose. You admit you made a bad choice in your opinion, but maybe it is just a step to learning.  What if it hadn't got you here with people that understand, and have some good suggestions?  I got here from making some poor choices in life, but I am grateful because I feel I now have maybe the best life, the most hope, and something to really look forward to Even when I am hurting I know I know the way out, mostly because of good people at BB and the info I'm linked to so I can again, look through it and make a sound decision.

 

 

[[or...]]

You accomplished something today that is one of the hardest things for me to do, find a doctor appointment, even finding a doctor at all, so don't try to tell me you are not strong and can do what you need to do.  Just those awful phone-calls where you can hardly get someone to do anything but put you on hold stuck there to listen to crappy music.  You're on the internet, talking to people. You have a lot of skills, start giving yourself some credit for doing the right things now, your so-called mistake is in the past.  We take what we've learned and move forward and try to make new and better decisions, with much love and been there done that, Denise

 

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32 minutes ago, [[s...] said:

Hi @[Fa...]. Honestly I’m not sure. I just want to do the safest thing with the least risk. It seems 50/50 regarding people’s suggestions - some say get back on & taper. Some say don’t get back on at all. So far nobody’s said get back on & don't taper which is what my Dr is suggesting. 
 

If my Dr would allow a taper at a safe pace I’d maybe do it. I’ve just heard this  can be brutal and I don’t know the difference between that and straight up never using them again. I’ve also heard cross tapering w Valium is an option but I don’t know how that works and I’m terrified to use another med. 
 

A large part of me wants to never touch them again but I don’t know how that would affect the severe anxiety/panic they were suppressing. 

Mostly, and I read a lot here, I see folks not reinstating, or have not reinstated.  The fact you are able to still type coherently makes me think you could make it through the CT without reinstating.  If you are young and strong, I can't remember now how long you've been off.  Have you seen even a twinkle of a Light at the end of the tunnel, relief from some of your wd sxs?  I have them, but there is such hope and it far out-weighs my fears and wd sxs (bad days).  It takes a lot of energy to think so much so you are not without power, you know, out of gas   I just think sometimes we have to realize, because of something that happens to us in life, how strong we really are