Daily fatigue intermixed with depression

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The fatigue I'm having with this wave is just brutal. Several hours a day I feel like I can't keep my eyes open and often have to push back against negative thinking again and again and again. I can sleep at night (waking up several times) but my dreams are long and vivid. I wonder if I'm simply not getting rest even though I'm sleeping.

What do folks do about withdrawal fatigue? I don't want to introduce caffein or other stimulants which could trigger other SX.

[[Ma...]]

Me too. All of a sudden an intense sense of fatigue will hit me. Other times I am just restless.

When you awake at night does it feel like a cortisone rush or adrenaline?

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20 hours ago, [[M...] said:

Me too. All of a sudden an intense sense of fatigue will hit me. Other times I am just restless.

When you awake at night does it feel like a cortisone rush or adrenaline?

No, not for me. I just wake up, maybe use the bathroom, go back to sleep. Knowing what others are going through, this doesn't sound that bad, but when it happens frequently the next day I'm just dragging.

I was reading about low dopamine; the symptoms sound more or less like me. Fatigue, down mood, restless sleep. Yesterday I felt awful, then around 5pm my brain just sort of righted itself and the rest of the day was ok. Now this morning, muscle spasms, anxiety, fatigue...... sigh.

[[Ho...]]

I know what you mean—sometimes I just can't move! I'm just beat. I have to use the railing to drag my body up the stairs. Other days I'm beat and also restless. Not my favorite. But I have noticed that this brand of tiredness usually results in a little boost in healing. Something good comes of it. It's a tiny boost but I don't care. So I'm getting better at letting myself rest and go with it. Radical acceptance. So many things to radically accept! Still, I like the phrase and try to reach it.

RN I'm so tired and just can't get myself moving, not at all, all day long. I hate afternoons anyway because that's when I feel the worst and also the most restless and down. I bought Baylissa Frederick's book 'Recovery & Renewal' months ago and couldn't read it. Now I'm able to read again, more and more, so I'm picking the book up every once in a while. Trying to add another practice about positive self talk. The operative word is trying but I think it does help! 

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Thanks @[Ho...], I hear you. It seems incredible the "simple" things I can't bring myself to do when I'm so tired or down (read a book, watch TV, etc...). Interesting how afternoons are bad for you, because for me its unquestionably the mornings. Days are generally tough until after noon then move into various levels of "easier".

[[PE...]]

[[Ho...]]

Yeah, I don't know why that is! Mornings used to be beyond horrible, and then as the day went on it would slowly lift and at night, I felt such relief!

A few months ago it switched. Mornings were more and more sweet. I even felt that nice warm glow sometimes. Then as the day went on I'd feel worse and worse and evenings weren't so great after a while. All of this happened so slowly I didn't register the change until I was on the other side.

For the past week mornings have gotten rougher again. I don't have much appetite but I can eat some fruit and green tea and I'm not nauseous. Then it builds and gets worse all day and doesn't let up until 8:30 pm. I have a grandson staying with my husband and I for two weeks before he leaves for college. I think/thought my stress level was high and that's why I'm not feeling great. He's an easy, super-nice kid. Buys and makes most of his food, cleans up after himself, comes home quietly, I couldn't ask for a sweeter grandson. But I don't want him to notice how I've changed and am trying to 'keep up appearances'. I think it's taking a toll. 

Only six more days. I'll be sad when he goes. Just want these next 5-6 days to be nice for him. 

On the other hand my whole feel good/feel bad schedule might be flip flopping again. Who knows? I'm 11 months out and was hoping to be healed by now. Not yet.  Some day!

[[dj...]]

[[dj...]]

There was another point I forgot to make in my reply yesterday.  I would be very weary of any doctor trying to tell you that you’re depressed and need therapy, medication, etc.  My doctors tried to tell me all this fatigue was depression and it wasn’t.  It was simply fatigue from the benzo injury.  Of course you are less energetic and enthusiastic about life when you’re run down.  Who isn’t?