My Diazepam Taper Continues...

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Back with another update...as of last night, I am down to 3mgs.  Closer and closer to the end! 

 

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Another update...down to 2.5 mgs! 

 

Schatje

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How are things going Schatje?  Was wondering if you are down to just one dose a day.  I dropped to 7mg's today and once I get to 5mg's I am going to only be taking my nite dose.  No more morning dose and it scares the heck out of me.  I am going off of Ashton and feel I need to get some sleep, so need to cut the morning dose.  Hope all is well.

Renee

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Hi Guys,

 

Renee:  Since crossing over, I switched my dose to ALL in the evening.  I always did that w/ the Clonazepam, so once I completed the crossover the way Aston suggests, I took my full dose of Diazepam each evening...it agreed w/ me more that way.

 

I am now down to 2mgs as of last night!  I managed to go out to a "Outdoor Movie Night" at a neighbour's house to celebrate our kids finishing another school year.  I was able to bake homemade cupcakes for it and I even slept well last night.  I know it may not last, but I'll take the good days as they come. 

 

All the best to everyone!!!

 

Love and hugs,

Schatje

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Me again...down to 1.5 mg tonight!  15 days away from being done!

 

Schatje

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Hey Schatje:

 

You are getting there!!  Kudos to you -- the reward will be worth it all.

 

I'm rooting for you -- a day to remember when you take your last bit of V.  :smitten:

 

God bless,

Rocko

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Hello Everyone!

 

Tonight I will cut to .5mg of Diazepam (Valium).  I am pleasantly surprised that this past week has not been as rough!  I thought the final few cuts would prove to be horrendous after getting hit so hard at 4mg...but things have settled and some days I feel the best I've felt throughout the entire taper!  I am hoping this isn't the "calm before the storm". 

 

The biggest problems as of lately are:  1)  my eyes - my eyesight is HORRIBLE now and my eyeballs feel like they get pulled around...a strange sensation but I seem to be getting use to it.  2)  Panic attacks...although not daily, when I get hit w/ one it's pretty terrifying and I can't get over how much worse a w/d panic attack is compared to the ones I went ON benzos for!  3)  Some GI discomfort (queasy, gas...that won't come out, gurgling, stomach tightening sensations).  4)  Restlessness...I can't sit still...if I do the anxiety worsens, so I try to keep busy...at least I'm getting a lot done around my home!  But I do miss the days when I could curl up on the bed w/ a great book.  That will come though.  5)  This is the one that bothers me the most...it's hard to describe, but I guess it's this overwhelming wave of emotion where I HAVE to cry...sob actually...and it's almost like I lose complete control of my emotions.  I feel like if I don't cry I'll explode and yet when I DO cry, I feel almost queasy w/ it...it's a very "out of control" feeling and whatever it is, I don't like it! 

 

Well, that's it so far.  Again, those s/x aren't constant, but they are the ones that are the most prevalent for me towards the end of my taper.  My sleep has been amazing lately - 7 solid hours per night.  I feel very fortunate for that. 

 

So tonight I go to .5mg...and Monday night will be my last dose!  I'll be completely, 100% med free and plan to stay that way for the rest of my life!!!  For the first time ever, at the age of 33, I will learn how to cope w/ anxiety/depression of any kind w/out ANY meds...I'm scared but excited. 

 

Hugs to all,

Schatje

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Nice work.

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Schatje,

I am so happy for you!!!!!!  Its nice to hear that after you hit that wall at 4mg that you are doing better now.  I keep hearing the lower we get on our tapers the harder it seems to get.  I have been doing pretty bad since I hit 6mgs.  I am hoping it gets better.......So proud of you!!!!!

Renee

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Hi Renee,

 

I truly mean it...things actually DID get better as I got much lower...strange, eh?  I have had some rough moments...mainly evening/nights are bad.  Not during the night (I sleep well...although having some crazy dreams these past 2 nights)...usually around dinner time till about bed time I can feel rough...and by rough I mean heightened anxiety and sometimes some stomach upset.  Lots of gurgling/popping noises in my stomach that always scare me when I'm in that heightened anxiety state.  But the wall I hit at 4mgs was by far the worse thing so far.  10 days straight of unrelenting anxiety and panic....nausea through the roof and just this feeling of being "crazy".  I thought it would never end...but it did!  And I kept waiting for it to get worse - but it never did!  I'm really shocked and pleasantly surprised.  I am hoping this isn't a break before things get really bad...but I'm trying to think positive.

 

You too are getting so close and I'm so excited for you.  I am hoping to come back time and time again w/ only MORE good news for you.

 

Take care,

Schatje

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I'm so so happy for you! I'm glad that you're getting sleep too. Med free. Wow! I can't wait to say that. You've done a remarkable job. 

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Thank you Juusthere,

 

I keep trucking along!  This new anxiety that has come over has been pretty hard as it is extremely intense.  Also, I woke up this morning after 4hrs sleep w/ major morning anxiety and am now on here trying to calm down.  I just hope so badly that once I'm off it doesn't get much worse....if worse at all.  The same I can handle as I've done it this long....and better would be amazing but I highly doubt right away. 

 

All the best to you...you'll do this.

 

Hugs,

Schatje

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You'll do this too Schatje. I was looking at your taper progress in your sig, very impressive. One of the things you might try when going through these periods of anxiety is find an old photo album or high school yearbook where you can reminisce. Taking a mental trip to the "good old days" helped me when anxiety would attack as I relived how I felt back then. It's not a cure-all, time will do that, but it might distract you enough where you forget your discomfort - which won't last - for a little while.

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Thanks Steve for the great feedback! 

 

What a great idea...seeing as how I have TONS of photo albums and lots of great memories.  I will try that for sure!

 

All the best,

Schatje