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wondering what is the use


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i used to be such a positive person. so loving and funny and caring. now im just a monster. Ive ran off anyone who has healed bc there has only been one or two as bad as me. i ask the hard questions. get real honest. I pursued too hard. now im just alone. i was successful and happy and in love. now my world is totally broken. im on disability. lost my career my easy dream job. intrusive thoughts. was poly drugged into insantit and abused by drs and hospitals. did and said things i cant take back. therapists totally dismantled me. my motherhood is gone. im def one of the worst cases but have turned into one of the worst people. my husband has had to ask me things that no one should have to be asked. i have no one to talk to
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