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how do you know if you heal


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nit sure where this belongs. when this has stripped you of all your value. all of your identity. how do you know if you are healing when your mental symptoms cause such bad ptsd you cant tell if you have having it or reliving it. all day every day. all the ptsd from being forced to take things and do things in hospitals. the stark difference between what used to be and what is now....things i cant mention. how do you even  know you heal?

 

Edit: Removed profanity.

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Hi boymom,

 

It's difficult to know we're healing because we hurt emotionally and physically but we are, I couldn't feel it when I was, I didn't know until all of my symptoms left me and I was free.  So you may not be able to recognize you're healing because our mind won't let us believe it because of the fear but when you recover, I promise, you'll know.

 

Could you add your medication history to your signature so our members will be able to see where you're at in your journey to better help you.  Here are the instructions.  Add your history/signature 

 

Pamster

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I hope you understand that I am in no way downplaying what you've been through. I really am not. I can tell you've been through some horrible stuff.

 

But...

 

When you're healing, you're probably not going to be troubled in the same way. The systems which regulate your emotions are completely out of kilter and that is the main reason that you feel so terrible all the time. To a large extent, you will naturally be able to regulate your emotions better with time, as you heal. You can help this along by being kind to yourself as much as possible and doing all the other generally healthy stuff that gets recommended.

 

I think it's far more likely that you'll develop a renewed vigour for life than chronic PTSD, when you're at the end of your benzo journey. That may sound fanciful but it's what I have read more often and it feels like the direction I am headed. I thought the same thing "how will I even know if I have healed, it's been so long I have forgotten, etc etc". You'll know the real you when you see her. It'll be like sliding into a pair of old pants.

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The healing is so gradual that you often don’t notice it. I’ve found it helpful to keep a daily journal of how I’m feeling and look back a month earlier to remind myself of my progress. Or you could quantify it. For example, in July I had 2 good days, August 5 good days, September 8 good days, etc
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