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Permanency


[02...]

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[02...]

This is permanent for some people. I used to think people were crazy or something to  stil be suffering years and years later. As time goes on your awareness grows.  I guess they tell people it's not so mass cult like activites don't happen.

 

I was so stupid for believing.

 

This will probably get deleted to hide the truth. Oh well.

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Admins. Please delete. Don't want to trigger anymone. I wasn't thinking when i wrote this.

Hey Perth,

 

I don't remember if I said it or just thought so maybe I am repeating myself... but I have noticed that your writing is clearer than it was a couple of months ago which I take as a sign of improvement. I think this post indicates improvement too. I'm sorry that you're still struggling with such desperate feelings and difficult emotions. Nobody deserves that. I'm glad that you seem to be handling them a bit better than before though. I think that you vented your frustration here and that served the useful purpose of getting it out of your system. If that's the case, I'm glad you posted. I'm sure that you would have dwelled on this for longer a month or two ago. It's a clear improvement. I hope it carries on for you.

 

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Admins. Please delete. Don't want to trigger anymone. I wasn't thinking when i wrote this.

 

I agree with BAM, I see improvement, the Perth of a few weeks ago would not have been able to acknowledge the pain of others, this clearly shows that you can see past your own misery enough to care about others.  This isn't possible when we're in the depths of despair, we can only see our own pain so even though you can't feel or see improvement, it's happening.  The problem for you and everyone who goes through this is, its not fast enough, it never is. 

 

I plan on being here until I see your success story Perth.

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I do understand how you feel Perth I have unrelenting OCD and intrusive thoughts not as severe as you also  mine only became unrelenting since taking AD so not as long as you have suffered. But I do think the feeling this is permanent is all down to the drugs. We just have to believe people who say it will pass. I think because recovery is definitely non linear when we have a really black day we are unaware that we are still making progress . Just wanted to let you know you aren't alone in this.
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[14...]
I'm sure it is permanent to a certain degree for some of us (myself included) But this is our life. There's techniques we can adopt to mitigate our suffering. Choosing to continuously feed into the thoughts associated with our fears will only lead to greater suffering. Give your mind a rest. That's my advice
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[14...]
For most of us (myself included) there's something underlying this condition. It's the equivalent of throwing fuel on the fire created by benzos. If we can bring awareness to this and refrain from this, we'll be better able to heal in my opinion
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I'm sure it is permanent to a certain degree for some of us (myself included) But this is our life. There's techniques we can adopt to mitigate our suffering. Choosing to continuously feed into the thoughts associated with our fears will only lead to greater suffering. Give your mind a rest. That's my advice

What do you have that’s permanent?

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I hope Conrad is wrong and this hell isn't permanent. I think we probably do these sorts of posts, because when symptoms go on for a long time with no improvement there is an underlying fear that this could be the new normal for us.

 

I know it is unhelpful to compare with others experiences, but it's basic human nature to do so. Thus when you see other people improving you fear you are the only one still in this limbo. So it provides some sort it reassurance that it is withdrawal causing this and not a permanent disorder when  you read of others still feeling very distressed after a long time.

 

I haven't consciously noticed any improved and sadly developed many more symptoms after taking anti depressants. But I do find some days like today feel greater sense of hopelessness than others so maybe that is sign there is a slight shift.

 

It is also the sense of abandonment by the medical profession, with a cocktail of more drugs seeming to be their only solution, certainly in my case.

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