Falling out of Recovery and Diving Back In, my 10yr Xanax and Klonopin story

[[th...]]

Hi all,

 

I'll summarize. I'm F/26 and had my first panic attack at 16. It was debilitating and I was driving (pulled off safely) and called an ambulance. Rushed to the hospital and the doctor found nothing wrong and explained I had a panic attack (I had been in psychiatric care since 10 with various diagnoses but struggled a lot with OCD and anxiety but was no stranger to psychotropic meds). I like to say I abused a benzo the first night I got it because immediately after I got my first dose I asked for more for the ride home. This started 7 years of Xanax use (in. dose, 1/mg 2x a day, quickly going up to 4mg a day) among other psychotropics that would come and go. I knew I was addicted by the time I turned 18 but managed to do college/masters but coming real close to failing out with both. I was not taking as prescribed.

 

3 years ago, my psychiatrist decided to switch me from 2mg of Xanax to 2.5mg Klonopin. No plan to taper just switching. I knew then that I needed to get help but I wasn't ready. My life spiraled out of control in the next 3 years with my benzo abuse among other substances, but I knew more than anything that benzos were the number 1 culprit. I checked myself into a 75 day detox/rehab earlier this year. They attempted to detox me in 7 days and I seized 3x. Hospitalized with DTs. Never again. Soon after, I relapsed.

 

However, during these last few months stabilizing meds, going to therapy, and having honest dialogues with my psychiatrist and therapist, we've decided a slow taper off Kpins with Kpins. I feel stronger now, especially with a head full of recovery, that as uncomfortable as this will be I can do it. Can't wait to learn from this community!

[[ma...]]

Hi thorsbestfriend and Welcome to Benzobuddies

 

We are glad you’re here welcome to the community  Its great that you feel ready for this, I know you will get through it, keep positive.  Well done to you on your college/masters.    It’s sad that you’ve had to deal with psychiatric issues from such a young age, that can’t have been easy for you.    Benzodiazepines are like a magic pill initially, I thought I found a friend for life. I had no idea how quickly they can turn on us and make things a whole lot worse.  Seizures can be dangerous, you say you’ve had several.  I would consult with a doctor/neurologist, prior to making any changes in your benzo medication.

 

In general it’s advised to cut your daily dose by somewhere between 5% and 10% every 10 - 14 days.  A gradual taper of 5-10% every 10-14 days is generally recommended.  Many need to taper much slower, whatever feels comfortable, the aim is to try to keep symptoms manageable.

 

The Ashton Manual. This is a great resource for understanding the effect benzo’s have on our body,  I would suggest you check it out.  The manual provides taper and withdrawal information

 

I will leave a few links:

 

Planning Your Withdrawal(TaperPlans)

Withdrawal Support

Klonopin Klub 

 

If you would like to add a signature  (history of medication/doses etc). It will help members give you relevant advice. Go to the top of the page and select PROFILE then choose forum profile then insert drug history into the text box and remember to click change profile

 

Welcome aboard

Magrita