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I'm 19 months of rapid taper from 1mg clonazepam (short term user)

 

In month 8 I was put on 15mg of Remeron.  6 months on Remeron I started tapering and am down to 8.45mg.

 

Out of nowhere, my brain has decided to latch onto food and I think about eating constantly 24/7.  It is a looping stuck thought that doesn't leave.

 

This is a 100 percent chemical.  Sometimes it fades away and the other racing, looping, sticking, and other thoughts come back. So please don't tell me to seek help or a therapist because it won't help this.

 

I have no idea if this is from the benzos or remeron or a combination.

 

I don't know if remeron is toxic to me and I need to get off with a rapid taper or continue how I am tapering.  (10 percent every 3-4 weeks) or slow down.

 

I am going absolutely insane more than ever and I don't know what to do.

 

 

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[b9...]
You’re articulate and seem to be coherent so that’s good.  I know I could not tolerate the Zoloft when I was not on benzos and got off it super fast.  I could not even tolerate 12.5mg.  I am not sure how difficult Remeron is to taper...Zoloft was a walk in the park compared to the benzos.  I am still not well at 12 months but have only been off Zoloft now for 9 months.  Anyway I’m sorry enough about me.  I wanted to share what I went through, I know what the intrusive looping thoughts are like and it’s torture.  I have been sleeping like it’s my job today and I really think the rest is helpful now that I can sleep.  Are you able to rest at all? 
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My Paxil mind rape withdrawals are really bad, like worse than the benzos bad.  Fortunately I can stop and balance out a bit after 3-5 weeks.  If you have noticeable mental symptoms induced by your reductions, that is probably a good thing.

  Since I am have not been remotely gentle in my taper, it has been extremely obvious what the Paxil withdrawals are doing and I am able to clearly feel the mental suffering disparity between really bad and a later stabilized place of not as bad with continuous improvement. I am going to slow it down now and assume it will be back to a state of constant difficulty like the benzos until some time after I finish.

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My Paxil mind rape withdrawals are really bad, like worse than the benzos bad.  Fortunately I can stop and balance out a bit after 3-5 weeks.  If you have noticeable mental symptoms induced by your reductions, that is probably a good thing.

  Since I am have not been remotely gentle in my taper, it has been extremely obvious what the Paxil withdrawals are doing and I am able to clearly feel the mental suffering disparity between really bad and a later stabilized place of not as bad with continuous improvement. I am going to slow it down now and assume it will be back to a state of constant difficulty like the benzos until some time after I finish.

 

Myke you are recently off benzos. How on earth are you tapering paxil so quickly?  I am 18 months off my benzo and I’m currently tapering an SSRI. If you can believe it, I have only reduced by 8% over a YEAR. Because I’m trying to minimize symptoms. I’ve heard others say that you should wait until you’re completely recovered from benzo withdrawal before starting another taper ... But I’m impatient so I started. I just have to go at a snails pace.

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I am incredibly sick of the drugs and firmly believe that they work hand in hand.  Getting off the benzos is brutal but I am not so sure that these other psych drugs are any easier or less damaging when tolerance is reached. I forced my way through most of this process because I am scared of maintaining the drugs and the terrible symptoms any longer.

  I decided not to get so far away from acute withdrawal hell that I would seriously injure myself when I fell back down in the hole with Paxil withdrawals on top of my preexisting benzo withdrawals.

  I wouldn't recommend it and I assure you that acute is still very bad, but boy howdy am I scared to get all better and fall that far!

  I guess maybe I persevere due to stupidity, resolve or fear.  Doesn't seem to matter how I do it, just that l get it done and get back to real life.

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Myke, I understand your impatience. Agree with you that these medications are poison! I cannot wait to become free of the Sertraline ... but I’m going very slowly in order to stay functional for my job. Yes it’s going a lot slower than I would like!

 

Happy healing to you!

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[99...]
I saw a program on TV the other day. it was about thoughts. the doctor there told us that our thoughts are created in the space of two nerve cells where neurotransmittors are connecting its called synapses. he said that serotonin is an important neurotransmitter in the formation of thoughts. in BWS , our neurotransmitters are disturbed. we know that. I think that I, as you who suffer from these crazy intrusive thoughts for days on end, may have an even greater disturbance right here. in the exchange between nerve cells. he also mentioned that we speak about 120-150 words per minute but about 1500 thoughts pass in the gap between our nerve cells in a normal brain. it's like you say Perth. this is chemical. it does not matter how much therapy we get. this will go over when our brain is in balance again i think
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I'm 19 months of rapid taper from 1mg clonazepam (short term user)

 

In month 8 I was put on 15mg of Remeron.  6 months on Remeron I started tapering and am down to 8.45mg.

 

Out of nowhere, my brain has decided to latch onto food and I think about eating constantly 24/7.  It is a looping stuck thought that doesn't leave.

 

This is a 100 percent chemical.  Sometimes it fades away and the other racing, looping, sticking, and other thoughts come back. So please don't tell me to seek help or a therapist because it won't help this.

 

I have no idea if this is from the benzos or remeron or a combination.

 

I don't know if remeron is toxic to me and I need to get off with a rapid taper or continue how I am tapering.  (10 percent every 3-4 weeks) or slow down.

 

I am going absolutely insane more than ever and I don't know what to do.

 

 

Just to let you know the NAC seems to be making OCD  worse so stopping it for a while. The general advice seems to be gradually come off anti depressants must say withdrawal from citalopram been hard. Given up hope of recovering. Desperately want to believe it when people advise you will recover but find it hard to accept at the moment. When you never see a slight chink of improvement. Like you I'm convinced this all chemical, as I was a functioning person before this, who could go out without being terrified of my thoughts.

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