HELP! Need support after setback

[[Su...]]

Dear fellow buddies

 

I have not been posting much about myself. I jumped about 7 months ago and after a difficult 2 first months, I was making some sort of progress. Then, over the past 2 days, I have been in a terrible wave, with all my symptoms up, as if I was back in acute... all this hard work has been wasted... I am trying to understand what caused it and can only think of 1 or 2 factors:

 

* Factor 1: over the past 2 days, I ate twice a fish dish with a sauce containing white wine. The timing matches the wave so I think this is the culprit... even if the quantity I had was small...

 

* Factor 2: i had a difficult meeting at work 1 week ago. But the wave did not start until 5-6 days after that meeting so I am not sure...

 

Not sure what to believe...

 

Can any of you relate?

 

Did you have any setbacks? If so  how long did it last?

 

Did people eventually recover after a setback?

 

Thank you for your support.

 

SG

 

 

[[Go...]]

Well your only 7 months off. I was sick daily until 10 months off with no windows. And yes many people recover from setbacks. I’m 30 months off and I’m in the worst setback I’ve ever been in.

[[di...]]

Third option is probably the more likely option. I suspect it's just the order of things in your recovery journey. I guess it's disappointing to bs hit with symptoms like that after doing well for a while. All you can do is adjust. At least you know how to live with bad symptoms. Soon enough you'll be feeling alright again, just gotta ride it out. You got this, playa!

[[le...]]

Are you trying to withdrawal or cutting down the anti depressant? If so could well be that, withdrawal from anti depressant been horrible much worse than zopiclone. Every time I dropped the dose been really bad. Also you can get a thing called the 6 month wave. Everywhere states recovery is non linear seems just par the course. But certainly any change in dose from anti depressant can hit really hard.

[[...]]

I'm not sure as you are still on another meds, otherwise I can be the wine.

 

I had countless setbacks from food contains any trace of wine after jumping from valium.

[[Su...]]

Are you trying to withdrawal or cutting down the anti depressant? If so could well be that, withdrawal from anti depressant been horrible much worse than zopiclone. Every time I dropped the dose been really bad. Also you can get a thing called the 6 month wave. Everywhere states recovery is non linear seems just par the course. But certainly any change in dose from anti depressant can hit really hard.

 

@Godsmyhope, thanks for your message. Sorry to hear about your setback at 30months. That must be really tough indeed.

 

@Diaz-e-BAM, indeed, you may well be right. The setback could just be a wave nastier than usual and part of the non-linear recovery...

 

@ leann, I am suspecting the amitriptyline taper could be the source of my problem. It wasn't much of a problem going from 20mg to 18mg, but going from 18mg to 16.2mg seems more problematic. I find tapering difficult in practice: I use a jeweller balance and I file the pill until I reach the desired weight but that's not always very accurate and it could be I have been reducing the dose inadvertently, thus causing WD symptoms to flare.

 

@4mom, thanks for sharing your experience. I am definitely going to stay clear from any alcohol in the future.

 

[[le...]]

I found cutting down citalopram hard as tiny tablets, seemed be lot worse the lower I got and difficult to measure accurately. Think could well be the cause. I've been off them about 5 weeks now was awful towards the end. No where near better OCD still ever present, only thing I would say is I get the odd day when it definitely lessens. Is roller coaster literally varies from 1 day to the next. Was on zopiclone 12 years and AD 6 months but withdrawal hit straight away with them and much worse but you do come out the other side honestly 

[[Su...]]

Leann,

How fast was your tapper? what mg or % did you use as a reduction. I'm curious...

SG

[[le...]]

I was on 10mg, cut down to 7.5, then 5 then 2.5, then stopped as ended up being dust. Did it over 6 weeks probably quicker than recommended, but felt so dreadful on them couldn't take long withdrawal. As you've been them on them long time probably best do it more gradually. I went on UK site patient forum was quite helpful. Everyone different if you'll feeling really bad don't decrease until you level out a bit and obviously don't go cold turkey!

[[le...]]

Surviving anti depressants got lot info recommend 10% cut. I was on very low dose and only been on them 6 months with dreadful side effects. My taper too quick for someone like you who been on them quite a long time so would recommend you do it longer. Diaz seem have lot experience of tapering.

[[Su...]]

@[le...]

I agree, for me it's going to be slow. Trying to speed things up will just make things worse. I fear I will have to be patient...

[[Pa...]]

Hi SurreyGuy,

 

I'm so sorry to hear about your setback, I hope it passes soon, please keep us posted how it goes for you, okay?  I'm glad you brought this up, I think you've been given some good feedback, it helps to get input from others when we're feeling beaten down.

 

Pamster

[[le...]]

Hi Surrey, yes in your case wise to go slow. As I said only went quickly because the side effects were unbearable on meds and I'd only been on them 6 months with the lowest dose. Just gauge how you feel I think if  you feel  bad wait bit until dropping dose. You will get there but do think what you are feeling could be AD withdrawal. Doctors don't appreciate what we go through coming off these meds stick with it

[[Su...]]

@[le...]

 

@Pamster, Pamster! so good to hear from you! I will certainly let the forum know how things are developing in a day or two.

 

SG

[[le...]]

That sounds a good idea, when the pills are small really difficult to accurately cut them up. People do advise to gradually reduce. I didn't find dropping by 2.5 mg too bad. First couple weeks were rough but eased a bit. As you say we are very sensitive and think can take while for symptoms to ease. I felt quite good yesterday but today very jittery again so just be prepared for it to be non linear. But I do feel better than when on them you will get there I'm sure good luck.

[[Su...]]

Well, today is much better. The anxiety and benzo flu have come down. so has the depression. And the tinnitus is faint. Last night was relatively good (7h of uninterrupted sleep with 1.5h of deep sleep). On the not so good side, extreme fatigue today and muscle weakness.

 

Still it's improvement compared to how I was 2 days ago...

 

The recovery goes on... with its roller coasters, its waves and windows, and its absurd non-linearity...

 

SG

[[di...]]

Brilliant Surrey! I knew you would pull around.

[[le...]]

Well, today is much better. The anxiety and benzo flu have come down. so has the depression. And the tinnitus is faint. Last night was relatively good (7h of uninterrupted sleep with 1.5h of deep sleep). On the not so good side, extreme fatigue today and muscle weakness.

 

Still it's improvement compared to how I was 2 days ago...

 

The recovery goes on... with its roller coasters, its waves and windows, and its absurd non-linearity...

 

SG

[[le...]]

Glad you are feeling better think I'll come off this site, after having very aggressive response from Diaz because I didn't agree with his view that mindfulness  will cure anything. Got enough to contend with at the moment especially from someone who doesn't even seem to come off meds yet and has no idea of what 18 months of withdrawal is like. Not feeling supported here when you can't express your own experience without being criticised.

[[di...]]

Ironically, my problem is that you keep spreading misinformation that is unhelpful to viewers.

[[le...]]

I'm done you obviously enjoy getting a response and upsetting people so well done you succeeded just let it go

[[Pa...]]

Glad you are feeling better think I'll come off this site, after having very aggressive response from Diaz because I didn't agree with his view that mindfulness  will cure anything. Got enough to contend with at the moment especially from someone who doesn't even seem to come off meds yet and has no idea of what 18 months of withdrawal is like. Not feeling supported here when you can't express your own experience without being criticised.

 

leann,

 

As you may recall, the team reviewed the comment in question and found nothing wrong with diaz-e-BAM's response.  Differing viewpoints are allowed and encouraged as long as they're presented in accordance with the rules and guidelines of the forum.  Your public attack is unacceptable, please disengage.

 

Pamster

[[le...]]

Don't quite understand how it's OK for someone to heavily criticise me and send me an aggressive private message that you find perfectly acceptable , but I'm not allowed to answer back, he had upset me but that seems to be in important. Seems rules apply differently depending on who you are on benzo buddies. I really thought this was a forum to support people but seems not. The same rules should apply to everyone. I apologise if I sound angry but your response does seem unjustified.

[[Pa...]]

Don't quite understand how it's OK for someone to heavily criticise me and send me an aggressive private message that you find perfectly acceptable , but I'm not allowed to answer back, he had upset me but that seems to be in important. Seems rules apply differently depending on who you are on benzo buddies. I really thought this was a forum to support people but seems not. The same rules should apply to everyone. I apologise if I sound angry but your response does seem unjustified.

 

leann,

 

I don't find an aggressive private message acceptable, I ask you to use the Report this Personal Message so the team can take action if justified.  As for being heavily criticized by another member, we all share our opinions, this is the nature of the forum, we share our opinions.  In doing so, we should expect to have them challenged.  If the challenge is done in a respectful manner then the team will take no action as we prefer not to censure our members comments.  What the team does not wish to see is the person being challenged darting around the forum complaining to others about this, it's disruptive and unproductive.

 

Pamster

[[Su...]]

Feeling much better today in terms of depression and anxiety. I seem to be in some kind of yoyo mode. I did change something yesterday evening: I stopped taking melatonine. My sleep was no worse (or better for that matter) but I was much better when I woke up in the morning.

Apparently melatonine can cause short term depression, anxiety and nausea...  I will probably lay off melatonine for the foreseeable future. The recovery continue!...

SG