The Easier Taper Support Group

[[ga...]]

I've been holding for a few weeks now. I find that if I put in these short holds sooner rather than later, I get my feet back under me faster. When I did my long hold, I had been pushing through terrible symptoms for months. It took months to feel any improvement. Now, I put in holds if I have a few bad weeks, and it only takes a week or two to feel the improvement.

 

Just my 2 cents for today. Hope everyone is doing well and enjoying some special moments this holiday season.

 

Gardie

[[Ro...]]

I've been holding for a few weeks now. I find that if I put in these short holds sooner rather than later, I get my feet back under me faster. When I did my long hold, I had been pushing through terrible symptoms for months. It took months to feel any improvement. Now, I put in holds if I have a few bad weeks, and it only takes a week or two to feel the improvement.

 

Just my 2 cents for today. Hope everyone is doing well and enjoying some special moments this holiday season.

 

Gardie

 

Holding makes sense.  Once during this taper I alternated hold and cut days a few times. 

 

For me, 4 days at .40 and I'm cutting to .375 tonight.  I had held for a bit longer than 10 days at .44 , but it's wasn't for symptoms but that I was in my last week of working on an offsite location and didn't want to complicate things

[[be...]]

I've been holding for a few weeks now. I find that if I put in these short holds sooner rather than later, I get my feet back under me faster. When I did my long hold, I had been pushing through terrible symptoms for months. It took months to feel any improvement. Now, I put in holds if I have a few bad weeks, and it only takes a week or two to feel the improvement.

 

Just my 2 cents for today. Hope everyone is doing well and enjoying some special moments this holiday season.

 

Gardie

Gardie,you have come a long way, time for some improvement, nice feeling that we have a bit more control. Stay Strong.💖 Peace and Healing

[[ga...]]

I've been holding for a few weeks now. I find that if I put in these short holds sooner rather than later, I get my feet back under me faster. When I did my long hold, I had been pushing through terrible symptoms for months. It took months to feel any improvement. Now, I put in holds if I have a few bad weeks, and it only takes a week or two to feel the improvement.

 

Just my 2 cents for today. Hope everyone is doing well and enjoying some special moments this holiday season.

 

Gardie

 

Holding makes sense.  Once during this taper I alternated hold and cut days a few times. 

 

For me, 4 days at .40 and I'm cutting to .375 tonight.  I had held for a bit longer than 10 days at .44 , but it's wasn't for symptoms but that I was in my last week of working on an offsite location and didn't want to complicate things

 

Good plan.

[[ga...]]

I've been holding for a few weeks now. I find that if I put in these short holds sooner rather than later, I get my feet back under me faster. When I did my long hold, I had been pushing through terrible symptoms for months. It took months to feel any improvement. Now, I put in holds if I have a few bad weeks, and it only takes a week or two to feel the improvement.

 

Just my 2 cents for today. Hope everyone is doing well and enjoying some special moments this holiday season.

 

Gardie

Gardie,you have come a long way, time for some improvement, nice feeling that we have a bit more control. Stay Strong.💖 Peace and Healing

 

Thanks, BG. I'd say we've both come a long way. :smitten:

[[Ro...]]

Bad night last night.  Only got 6.5 hours of sleep and had plenty of energy today =)

[Guest [NM...]]

Bad night last night.  Only got 6.5 hours of sleep and had plenty of energy today =)

 

Crap night here too. Such a stressful time of year. It’s also an anniversary of great loss as well. Trudging through depression and coming to terms with it being nearly two years since my husband and I saw our son, his wife and children. 😪 I’ve been rather testy and quite frankly, b*tchy. None of these feeling are new or exclusive to tapering.

[[Ro...]]

I'm sorry you have a split family.  But, the positive is that you have a husband to lean on and he can lean on you.  Just try to note 3 positive little things every day.

[[ga...]]

... Just try to note 3 positive little things every day.

 

I like this Roland!

 

1. Enjoyed shoveling the driveway a bit. Really!

2. I mail-ordered something from a small, family business on Black Friday. It came today. When I opened the envelope, an individually-wrapped jelly bean fell in my lap. How cute it that?

3. I got my grocery shopping done today. Not as fun as a surprise jelly bean, but very important!

 

Gardie

[[Ro...]]

I got it from this vid

 

[[ga...]]

I got it from this vid

 

 

Nice video. I bookmarked it!

[[be...]]

I got it from this vid

 

[[Gw...]]

Three positive things from the past 24 hours:

 

1. A friend at work showed me how to crochet.

2. I'm back on the elliptical.

3. I got 8 hours of sleep last night.

[[ga...]]

Three positive things from the past 24 hours:

 

1. A friend at work showed me how to crochet.

2. I'm back on the elliptical.

3. I got 8 hours of sleep last night.

 

What a wonderful thing to read first thing this morning!

 

[[ga...]]

1. I stuck to my no-eating-before-bed rule last night.

2. I found chicken on super-sale at the grocery store.

3. I finished getting the path to the mailbox cleared of ice.

 

And my current hold is working well. I think I'm going to have a good Christmas this year with minimal symptoms. Haven't been able to say that in years! It's really wonderful to see bits of my pre-benzo life returning.

[[Ro...]]

1. I stuck to my no-eating-before-bed rule last night.

2. I found chicken on super-sale at the grocery store.

3. I finished getting the path to the mailbox cleared of ice.

 

And my current hold is working well. I think I'm going to have a good Christmas this year with minimal symptoms. Haven't been able to say that in years! It's really wonderful to see bits of my pre-benzo life returning.

 

That's great.  Positive thinking absolutely helps.

 

[[be...]]

1. I stuck to my no-eating-before-bed rule last night.

2. I found chicken on super-sale at the grocery store.

3. I finished getting the path to the mailbox cleared of ice.

 

And my current hold is working well. I think I'm going to have a good Christmas this year with minimal symptoms. Haven't been able to say that in years! It's really wonderful to see bits of my pre-benzo life returning.

[[Ro...]]

Down to .34 Klonopin on the way to .31 by end of this week 

[[ga...]]

Down to .34 Klonopin on the way to .31 by end of this week 

 

[[be...]]

Down to .34 Klonopin on the way to .31 by end of this week 

[[ga...]]

Christmas approaches! And all the other holidays, but for me it's Christmas. I'm still holding. Had a bit of a rough patch this past week but am back to feeling better.

 

I look back at how different I am now (during taper 2.0) than I was when I was tapering too fast.

 

My holidays were always so stressful, unbearable back then. My anxiety was so high. Yet I felt like I had to go through the motions of being "merry and bright." It didn't work at all! I was always glad when January came and the tree came down (if it was even up, usually not). I was actually ill with an autoimmune disorder before I started my benzo nightmare. Adding the benzo and then the taper made me 10 times worse. I felt like my life had been stolen from me, and I would never have a happy holiday again.

 

Then I did my year-long hold. It was hard! It took months for me to start to feel better. The Long Hold Support group was a great help. With their support, I held the whole year and saw tons of improvement.

 

Now I am tapering again. It's been long and slow, but it is a whole new experience. I may still be on my benzo, but I have definitely healed. No, not back to pre-benzo me because I'm still tapering, but my brain works so much better now than it did before. I think if I had to live with this level of disability forever, I could do it. Before my hold I didn't think life was worth living. Now I do. So my brain has definitely healed.

 

My tree is up and fully decorated. First time in years. I put my outside lights up, too! (Nothing up over my head. I'm not crazy! ) There are three presents under the tree so far and more to wrap. I am happy when I think about wrapping presents, rather than stressed. I actually sent out Christmas cards to everybody on my list! Some were even homemade. Yes, I have a new hobby, card-making. It's a good hobby for when I am stuck indoors and can't get to my garden. I did try to bring some potted herbs indoors for the winter. I tended them without being stressed about how sad they looked. (Should have used smaller plants or bigger pots.) And when they died, I pitched them out without being upset. (There are tons more outside that will be back in spring.) Yes, this is just normal life stuff. Decorating, hobbies, plants. But this is stuff I couldn't do during my fast taper. I was so jittery all the time. I can do it all now.

 

I am writing this so people can know that a taper does not have to be a trip through hell. And even if it becomes one, it's possible to improve things and it's possible to even heal as you taper. I have a lot of hope that I will be even better when I am finally off. That will probably be over a year from now because I will never ever try to force my brain to heal faster than it can again. It can have all the time it wants. I know I am healing.

 

Gardie

 

[[Gw...]]

What a wonderful post, Gardie! 

 

I'm getting into the holiday spirit more this year, too. I always dreaded this season - too much sadness and stress - but this year I decided to give it an honest try. My porch decorations are pretty awful, but an effort was made! We have lights inside that look nice, and my living room is super cozy when the fireplace is lit along with a pine scented candle. I haven't even thought about gifts or a tree...my finances are not in great shape since my car was stolen two weeks ago. But the point is that I'm trying! And it does cheer me up a bit too.

 

I'm so glad to read that you are having an easier time during this taper, enough to keep living life. And that's wonderful you are noticing improvement too! Stay strong.

 

Gwinna

[[ga...]]

What a wonderful post, Gardie! 

 

I'm getting into the holiday spirit more this year, too. I always dreaded this season - too much sadness and stress - but this year I decided to give it an honest try. My porch decorations are pretty awful, but an effort was made! We have lights inside that look nice, and my living room is super cozy when the fireplace is lit along with a pine scented candle. I haven't even thought about gifts or a tree...my finances are not in great shape since my car was stolen two weeks ago. But the point is that I'm trying! And it does cheer me up a bit too.

 

I'm so glad to read that you are having an easier time during this taper, enough to keep living life. And that's wonderful you are noticing improvement too! Stay strong.

 

Gwinna

 

Oh, I'm so sorry about your car, Gwinna! If only Santa could fit a new one on his sleigh.

 

It's so nice to read about your lights and fireplace and scented candle. Sounds wonderful. Given that my tree is artificial, perhaps I should get a pine scented candle, too!

 

Gardie

[[be...]]

Christmas approaches! And all the other holidays, but for me it's Christmas. I'm still holding. Had a bit of a rough patch this past week but am back to feeling better.

 

I look back at how different I am now (during taper 2.0) than I was when I was tapering too fast.

 

My holidays were always so stressful, unbearable back then. My anxiety was so high. Yet I felt like I had to go through the motions of being "merry and bright." It didn't work at all! I was always glad when January came and the tree came down (if it was even up, usually not). I was actually ill with an autoimmune disorder before I started my benzo nightmare. Adding the benzo and then the taper made me 10 times worse. I felt like my life had been stolen from me, and I would never have a happy holiday again.

 

Then I did my year-long hold. It was hard! It took months for me to start to feel better. The Long Hold Support group was a great help. With their support, I held the whole year and saw tons of improvement.

 

Now I am tapering again. It's been long and slow, but it is a whole new experience. I may still be on my benzo, but I have definitely healed. No, not back to pre-benzo me because I'm still tapering, but my brain works so much better now than it did before. I think if I had to live with this level of disability forever, I could do it. Before my hold I didn't think life was worth living. Now I do. So my brain has definitely healed.

 

My tree is up and fully decorated. First time in years. I put my outside lights up, too! (Nothing up over my head. I'm not crazy! ) There are three presents under the tree so far and more to wrap. I am happy when I think about wrapping presents, rather than stressed. I actually sent out Christmas cards to everybody on my list! Some were even homemade. Yes, I have a new hobby, card-making. It's a good hobby for when I am stuck indoors and can't get to my garden. I did try to bring some potted herbs indoors for the winter. I tended them without being stressed about how sad they looked. (Should have used smaller plants or bigger pots.) And when they died, I pitched them out without being upset. (There are tons more outside that will be back in spring.) Yes, this is just normal life stuff. Decorating, hobbies, plants. But this is stuff I couldn't do during my fast taper. I was so jittery all the time. I can do it all now.

 

I am writing this so people can know that a taper does not have to be a trip through hell. And even if it becomes one, it's possible to improve things and it's possible to even heal as you taper. I have a lot of hope that I will be even better when I am finally off. That will probably be over a year from now because I will never ever try to force my brain to heal faster than it can again. It can have all the time it wants. I know I am healing.

 

Gardie

 

Oh this is so wonderful to read Gardie...I am so happy for you, I know how you suffered, but I will always remember that even when you felt so badly you helped others here at BB, I applaud you and all that you do for others. Enjoy each moment and there will be so much ahead for you. Onward and Upward My  Friend. 💖 Peace and Healing.

[[ga...]]

Thanks, BG. The same back at you! You have been my inspiration. Turtles together forever! 

:smitten: