18 - 30 Month Plus Group

[[pe...]]

Thank you all for listing symptoms. I hope it didn't stir up too much grief for anyone. I seem to be the only one with persistent dr. That stinks. But it's helpful to get the lay of the land. I hope all your symptoms drop off one by one and very soon!

 

My symptoms:

Dr

Intermittent depression

Fatigue

Revving/buzzing in body

Tinnitus

Fight or flight feeling

Memory issues

 

 

Peace2

[[...]]

Wow, I've just had to had a telephone cons with my GP (not benzo related). Ramped my anxiety up, now sweating and tingling. She is a lovely GP but they scare the hell out of me. Does anyone else get this?

[[so...]]

Marj,

 

I don't go to doctors anymore since they don't acknowledge this withdrawal stuff.  But I do get revved at the slightest things.

[[so...]]

Today I had to go to 3 Target stores after being told on the phone I'd have all my grandson's birthday gifts at the first one.  Lost my keys in the third Target.  Found them on the floor of the boys clothes section.  Tell me that wasn't God giving me a friggin break!

[[so...]]

I know that the anxiety calmed down for a few of you.  Do I have any hope since it's my primary symptom that fuels all the others?  Or am I stuck like this?  When it resolved for those of you who had it, was it spontaneous?  When did it go away?

[[dr...]]

Mine recently(a few weeks ago)  died down pretty dramatically.  It was pretty spontaneous.  It still flares but nothing like it was.  For example, I just had two meetings and while I was anxious I had no panics and hat is my most stressful thing I have to do.  It has been much more manageable.  I also can feel the morning cortisol trying to push through but it can't really now which is great.  My HR will beat fast but it leaves pretty quick.  No feeling of death or foreboding.

I was thinking how much better I am but it still sucks moose balls.   

[[...]]

Thanks Sofa, yes it's crazy. I was anticipating a conversation about wd as I've told her about a year ago. She did ask and i said i still have symptoms, however she didn't disregard it. i think even if she's have said oh my you poor thing, it's horrible, but you will get through it i would still have been on the ceiling as I'd already worked myself up. It will be the same for you anything that is the slightest bit stressful ie losing your keys will be massive, when normally it would create a bit of a kerfuffle. Our nervous systems are out of whack so we over react. it will calm down and you will balance out again   

[[ci...]]

sofakingdone, My anxiety gradually and slowly lessened during the first year, by a year off, it had diminished so much that I was able to return to work. I occasionally get "whispers" of anxiety but they leave very quickly.

[[pe...]]

Does anyone else have a low level of constant dr? Anyone?

 

Peace2

[[...]]

Peace,

 

I have it right now and I think its stress related. After my Dr's telephone con yesterday, I was really worked up and it took me at least a couple of hours to calm. When I had, my son came to me to show me some lumps on his neck!! Needless to say i had the night from hell, with a screaming nightmare and I had to take him to the Drs (same one). He has swollen lymph glands. My mind is racing, I'm in agony, can hardly breathe and all this while being back at work pretending everything is normal. I know this is all about me, however we are under a lot of stress trying to carry on being mum, taking care of everything and working whilst putting on a brave face. Our brains are frying.

 

Stay strong, this is really hard 

[[Si...]]

Peace,

 

I have it right now and I think its stress related. After my Dr's telephone con yesterday, I was really worked up and it took me at least a couple of hours to calm. When I had, my son came to me to show me some lumps on his neck!! Needless to say i had the night from hell, with a screaming nightmare and I had to take him to the Drs (same one). He has swollen lymph glands. My mind is racing, I'm in agony, can hardly breathe and all this while being back at work pretending everything is normal. I know this is all about me, however we are under a lot of stress trying to carry on being mum, taking care of everything and working whilst putting on a brave face. Our brains are frying.

 

Stay strong, this is really hard 

 

So sorry that you got so stressed out marj. And having to go to work while worked up is not easy either. Hope your day gets better.

 

I was passing out on the sofa last night, so got in bed. Then I was wide awake. I got really worked up about it. Eventually I did fall asleep, but then popped up wide awake around 6am. Maybe got 4 hours.

[[Mi...]]

Hello Everyone,  It took me a day to read through posts to catch up! 

 

Congrats Nova on 2 years, that's amazing! Hope your infection gets better! I had a major kidney infection a while back and the antibiotic or the stress of it who knows brought me into a huge wave! 

 

Drew, the headache center sounds great! Keep going you are doing great!

 

Siggy, I know it's not great sleep but it's wonderful you are finally getting some!  Hopefully the acupuncture is helping with that! I know it sure helps with my physical sx!

 

Marj, keep staying strong! This absolutely sucks and yes health fear and doctor visits just reading your post made me anxious as my daughter told me last night she needs to get to the dentist! Oh boy!

 

Hello to everyone else! I can't remember who was asking about the DR? I get it and have been able to put it in a bit of perspective for myself now that I am more clear!  It seems to get me when I am nervous. Not normal nervous really really nervous! And after a episode I feel pretty stoned for a day or so! 

 

Coop, the health fears are eating me alive!  I can always relate to what you are saying! That is the number one thing I am working on right now!  All of the stuff that happens to us and the wired pains and this belly reflux stuff OMG! I think or I actually know the me before all of this would have had a hard time staying calm.  The me in w/d or I like to say healing= DISASTER!   

 

I am sorry if I am missing someone!  I have been completely out of it! 

 

Wishing you all the best and feeling great full for you all!  I would definitely be in a stray jacket with out you all! 

 

 

 

These past 10 days have been brutal beyond imaginable! 

Not this past Friday but the Friday before I got hit with major major stuff! Nothing was real everything looked different that's about all I remember! I have a few haunting memory's don't know if they are real or not but they sure feel real?  My hubby and Sister had to take turns freaking babysitting me I guess! They said it was like I was tripping on acid for 5/6 days! I was never left alone I guess!  I was told I begged and begged to be dropped off at a syc ward! Thank God no one did that!  I woke up Wednesday and I really truly woke up!  I don't know how to explain it!  I guess I am more present you could say!  More me than I have been in two plus years!  For the very first time I feel like I am actually here!  Idk I guess I had more dissociation than I ever thought because let me tell you! I have sooooooooo not been here in a long long time!  Which scares the shit out of me! Because I don't want to go back!  We bought a house this year in March I am told, I couldn't remember the month we moved! And we have these stained glass windows in one of the staircases leading to upstairs! Oh my they are kinda hideous! And I asked my hubby if we could get them out! He said I loved them and wouldn't let him replace them, lol!  That's what I mean I was so not present!  I sure thought I was!  The past few days I have been looking around this house just noticing a lot of things I haven't and I have been here since March!      And, I feel as if I haven't had a conversation with my kiddos, hubby, or sister in years!  I don't know how to explain it! I know physically I have but it's just so weird!

 

Anyways, I am not saying I have healed I certainly have not but being fully present has to be a good sign, right?   

 

It's also super scary because in a way it feels like a lot of the things I am experiencing I am experiencing for the first time! I have the memory's of them but boy some of these sx are extreme!  Since my waking up I like to call it/ being present I have been in to see my therapist with my hubby a few times! I am seeing here 2/3 times a week!  She is truly amazing!  And even she said it seems like it's the first time she is actually talking to me! My hubby and sister feel the same way!  My therapist totally agrees it's the meds and never to take one again! My hubby asked her about muscle relaxers as I guess every doc I see tries to give them to me! She said no way no pills at all!  So I feel I can trust her!  She also said my cold turkey and the night in the ER that I truly almost died was traumatic for me and that she thinks I have developed PTSD from this process which was totally managed completely wrong by every medical professional I saw for help! And the six week taper was ridiculous! If not down right cruel!  Her words exactly! So I am starting EMD with her tomorrow! And I think she is right! I have these memory's flash backs you could say that send me into instant panic!  I know the nerve pain and extremely low stress tolerance is benzo related and she agrees! But even when I am good I get so extremely nervous about everything!  I mean since that night of my CT I have to be with in 5 miles of a hospital at all times or I come unglued so I think she has a valid point! Hope this Eye movement therapy helps?..   

She also told my hubby and I staying present is my only job right now! I am not to leave my house unless it's with my hubby and I am in no way nervous about it!  And absolutely no plans are to be made! Live moment to moment!  I feel as if this is me surrendering to this and not fighting it! Which makes me mad but I think my only option is to trust her! My naturopath loves what she is doing so I guess that helps ease my mind as well!   

Now that I am present I do feel like they are on to something and it makes since because the more I push the more I feel un connected! The worse my anxiety hits and the more sx come out!  Throat closing, air hunger like I can't breathe, stoned feeling! 

 

I am a hot mess guys!

 

Oh boy sorry for the whole rant!

 

Love you all! 

 

Any thoughts on the PTSD?  Because in all honesty I never had bad panic or anything before the meds and as I am at home I think oh that would be fun or I want to go do that and then all of a sudden I see all the times I did go do this or that and freaked out and then I can't do it!  And the whole being close to a hospital it just doesn't make sense?  I always go back to that night! Will it get that bad again, I think?  And as much as I tell myself I am safe my brain and body won't except it?  I am by no means trying to minimize the withdrawl or it's effects I just think maybe I have a little more than just that going on?  I mean I love the outdoors!  Would rather be out than in any day! But for some reason I just can't get myself there!  Even while being present again! Which is furiating me!  And anytime I feel trapped, like the thought of going to work or to a relatives or friends and being stuck there, well I simply can't breathe in the moment of even contemplating that! But going to the local store and knowing I can walk out the door at anytime and having my hubby there so if I do freak or pass out or seizure like I did that night then he will get me to the hospital which is always 5 miles or less away! 

 

Like I said a hot mess and completely present and understanding just how big of a hot mess I am! 

 

 

[[so...]]

Thank you so much everyone for the reassurance about my anxiety and cortisol eventually going away.  You sweet friends are my life preservers.

 

So happy for your improvements, Jen.  You've really turned a corner!

 

Love, Sofa

[[...]]

good to read your update Jen.

 

Do you feel improvements after this wave? you mention feeling stoned, that's how I feel right now and I've been pretty stressed out too. I have major concrete head and neck, hate this so much.

 

Does your therapist believe WD? I've just started seeing one at work and I'm stressed about that too!! Don't want anyone to doubt me as it will make me doubt myself.

 

[[dr...]]

Hi all...

 

I have been sleeping much better lately.  No nightmares for almost tow weeks and I slept the whole night through with only one wake up.  slept from 10:45 until 5:50!  What a difference it makes.  It has been so long since I was able to sleep.

 

Also, after four days of front head pressure, clogged sinuses, and painful eyes it has left again.  I have been two days with clear head and no headaches.  Still have other stuff but I am managing.  I just came back from the Dr. office where I was getting some blood work done since we are trying to have a baby...they took twelve vials!!!  I had rapid hr and anxiety but my anxiety flares are all almost situational or anticipatory now and my rational mind is there a bit more.  Not good but betterer (yes that is a word cause I say so) 

 

This makes em optimistic that the periods of feeling better are getting longer and the bad periods are showing up less.  Yay me  

[[Si...]]

Hi all...

 

I have been sleeping much better lately.  No nightmares for almost tow weeks and I slept the whole night through with only one wake up.  slept from 10:45 until 5:50!  What a difference it makes.  It has been so long since I was able to sleep.

 

Also, after four days of front head pressure, clogged sinuses, and painful eyes it has left again.  I have been two days with clear head and no headaches.  Still have other stuff but I am managing.  I just came back from the Dr. office where I was getting some blood work done since we are trying to have a baby...they took twelve vials!!!  I had rapid hr and anxiety but my anxiety flares are all almost situational or anticipatory now and my rational mind is there a bit more.  Not good but betterer (yes that is a word cause I say so) 

 

This makes em optimistic that the periods of feeling better are getting longer and the bad periods are showing up less.  Yay me

 

That's great drew! Glad you are feeling better.

 

I'm not doing much better than I was. Sleep is still very elusive. I'm hoping I see a big improvement soon. Good luck on the baby. We've been trying for about 4 years with no luck.

[[dr...]]

We are at the fertility stage ourselves and the nurse said I will have to take Cipro...I freaked and me and the fiance got into an argument.  Can anything be easy on benzo withdrawal.

[[Te...]]

Drew ....gosh 12 vials....is a lot of blood....that would give anyone anxiety ....

 

Why Cipro ...is everything ok?

 

Wish you both good luck....babies are such a joy!

 

Hugs! TM

[[so...]]

Congrats to you, Drew, on feeling so much better!

 

Can anybody relate to feeling drunk and exhausted?  God this is awful and my grandson's birthday party is tomorrow.  Guess I'll show up as a tired old drunk.  Arrgh!

 

 

[[dr...]]

Drew ....gosh 12 vials....is a lot of blood....that would give anyone anxiety ....

 

Why Cipro ...is everything ok?

 

Wish you both good luck....babies are such a joy!

 

Hugs! TM

 

Something about not infecting your partner w anything while trying ivf?  Whatever...I'm not taking it.

[[Mi...]]

Drew if it helps I had to take cipro for a infection I remember being extremely nervous about it!  I just checked to make sure that was what it was for sure! I still have a few in the bottle! Anyways I had anxiety over it for sure and was about 13 months off benzos! It didn't affect me any other than just finding the courage to take them and then waiting for the reaction lol! 

 

I know we are all different just thought I would share my experience!   

[[Mi...]]

Marj,  Yes my psychologist totally believes in benzo withdrawl!  I wouldn't be seeing her if she didn't! As the original one I saw did not!  I have been seeing this one now for about a year or so! 

 

And yes now that I am more present,  although it's only been about a week I am finding a huge pattern to my high feeling/ stoned.  It goes up dramatically when I am anxious or after a panic is done!

 

[[dr...]]

Good news on feeling better Jen.  Thanks for the heads up on Cipro but if it comes to it I'd take some other type.  I can't risk something like that putting me back to a bad state.  Never again if I have any possibility.  Never. 

[[Mi...]]

Drew isn't cipro a antibiotic?  Maybe I am wrong?

[[Mi...]]

Ciproflaxin?