18 - 30 Month Plus Group

[[dr...]]

Good Morning ... pretty icky night ... broken sleep, tense dreams ... and I had to get up for a while and do my slow walk pacing thing to loosen things up ...

 

It is curious for me that I had misplaced my equilibrium so quickly after the effortless days ... something I worked at diligently to establish during my taper ... I suppose I may have chucked it out with some "baggage" during the recent effortless days ...

 

Paced my self around until I felt it coming back during the night ... perhaps it is like a cat ... "if you don't pet me every day I will find someone who will" ...

 

I don't feel I overdid things during those days ... rather a number of things showed up that I felt I needed to connect with so I did ...

 

Rather, I feel I needed a substantial respite ... and I got it ... and there was the constant question "is this it?" ...

 

I suppose that question has been answered ... more healing to be done ...

 

So ... I am settling in again ... and somewhat sad/depressed that I need to go further down this road ...

 

Oh well, it is what it is until it isn't ... and besides, I have some marvelous companions to accompany me ...

 

Got out my axe and bucket again ... more wood to chop, more water to carry ... and you know, there will always be wood to chop and water to carry ... and it is not a chore ... it is part of my daily rhythm ... well or ill ... 

 

It will take you a few days to readapt to feeling off.  It is nothing you did or didn't do.  It's the F'n drugs~

 

  I'm sorry sir.  Just catching up but off to gym before my meditation spot gets taken.

[[be...]]

Yep ... moping around feeling sorry for myself ... as we all know this stuff gets discouraging from time to time ...

 

Sofa ... yes ... I sense to that this is winding up for me ... and there is still work to be done I guess ... so just not winding up yet ...

 

How are you doing Drew ... hope you had a quiet day with all that good food ...

 

Me to Nova...and we know the moping gets us nowhere but feeling sorry for ourselves.

I have caught myself talking to the symptoms a lot lately.."will you please stop..enough is enough".

Good days bad days..is it to much to ask for a few good weeks?

 

I feel very rantish today..I don't think that's a proper word...but it fits my day.

 

Just another day in paradise.

[[be...]]

10 Fun Facts

 

1. You can't wash your eyes with soap

 

2. You can't count the hair on your head

 

3. You can't breathe through your nose with your tongue out

 

4. You just tried no. 3

 

6. When you did no. 3 you realized it's possible , only you looked like a dog 

 

7. You're smiling right now

 

8. You skipped no. 5

 

9.You just checked to see if there is a 5

 

10. Have the best day you can and I hope this brought a smile to your face.

 

[[...]]

10 Fun Facts

 

1. You can't wash your eyes with soap

 

2. You can't count the hair on your head

 

3. You can't breathe through your nose with your tongue out

 

4. You just tried no. 3

 

6. When you did no. 3 you realized it's possible , only you looked like a dog 

 

7. You're smiling right now

 

8. You skipped no. 5

 

9.You just checked to see if there is a 5

 

10. Have the best day you can and I hope this brought a smile to your face.

 

 

 

Wicked!!!!  love it 

[[Mi...]]

Beulah, thanks for the smile! 

[[dr...]]

lol...totally got me on 3!

 

I am having a decent day post migraine.  Still some stuff and a few momentary panic/anxiety things but nothing bad at all.  No sitting chemical anxiety or adreanline rushes.  As a matter of fact I commented to my fiance yesterday that my morning yucks of anxiety was gone and I got my visual aura within ten minutes    I used to get really whacked with anxiety and chemical stuff post migraines.  Tomorrow will be the true test but my last whole migraine experience was much mellower so I am hopeful.  It is 20% of what it was 3 months ago.  All in all, very functional and getting things done.  Stimulation brain problems here as always but a bit more manageable. 

[[No...]]

But Beulah ... I can count the hair on my head ... all six of them ... 

[[No...]]

Drew ... I know it is the drug ... and ... well, I suppose there isn't any "and" after that ...

 

Spent part of the day trying to catch that health fear chicken and wring its neck ... never did catch it, but the exercise may have helped ... 

[[Te...]]

I really have to stop looking at every symptom as a death sentence...I do this!

 

Beulah .....thanks!......you made me laugh.......

 

Drew.....you sound good....love to hear improvements...........yes.....

 

Take care Nova.........and hello to Marj....and Miss. Jen....sounds lke had a good weekend!

 

Too everyone else....have a restful sleep..

 

TM

[[dr...]]

Tm-Thats natural and very annoying. I do the same until I get to the "I don't care just kill me already" and then. Miraculously live

 

Okay...the post migraine usually resets my chemicals or something.its something to do w the serotonin storm caused by the auras.  Not exhausted, productive, and n anxiety. I'm sitting here mostly calm n my deck.  I can't wait til this artificial brain messed up crap from benzos  leaves and allows me inner peace most days.

[[Te...]]

Drew.......do you days......where it just never stops......symptoms just spin out of control all day?

Or maybe I should say did you have days like what I'm saying.....and now it's past to just migraine...issues but not all day?

 

Hope I'm making sense...

 

TM

[[dr...]]

Days of completely getting killed frm dawn til dusk?  Very rarely.  I mean I'll cycle in and out f hell every few hours.  From real crappy to just crappy.  Unless it's a headache or DR which can be with me all the time. I've had days where health anxiety and palps are nonstop. Again...less now

[[Mi...]]

Good morning from Minnesota everyone!  Wow is it chilly here today! 

So made it through the ENT apt yesterday! Little nervous but it went amazing!  One specialist down 2 to go!    Well the throat doc told me exactly what everyone else did!  And thank you for helping me through the Feeling of the throat closing ordeal!  And it sure was a ordeal!  :'(.  Well, I could not have had a nicer doctor! And he was very very old which always makes me feel better! Idk why?  But anyways he assured me there was no growths no cancer no anything that was constricting my throat! And everything looked absolutely perfect!  He even took the time to really explain to me what he thought was going on!  He said it's not in my head per say! That what happens is the muscles in the throat contract thus giving the feeling of the throat closing but in all his days (which he even chuckled and admitted were many). He has never had a patients throat actually close from the muscle contraction!  And worse case if it actually did I would pass out and my body would relax and my air ways would open right back up!  He wanted to give me a muscle relaxer! I explained that I was still healing from benzos!  Then he said well now it all makes since!  He no longer pushed the relaxer and said when it happens meditate do yoga whatever it takes!  Progressive muscle relaxation! Thought of you Drew! I have to get on this! Do you recommend a certain one?   

Anyways what a HUGE RELIEF!    I know this sx has come up a bit on this site but getting it checked was so so so comforting!      I was actually able to leave my town and drive to the in laws 3+ hours away with no extreme panic!  I didn't have to be with in a 5 mile radius of a hospital and when my throat started to feel that way I was able to say No,No,No poison you are not going to trick me today!  Although it's always easier to do when your not in a big wave!

Last week I never imagined being ok enough to go to a specialist and leave the house for the wknd!  So all of you hold on a sun break can come at anytime!    Much Love, 

 

I have had the throat closing, lump in throat, pain in throat, behind the adam's apple choking bullsh*t for like two months now!!!  It's with me every day, but not all day, and it definitely gets worse with stress or revving!!!  I spoke to Green privately and she made me feel better about it.  What a horrible side effect I'm so sick of it!!  The worst part is how bad it gets when I talk to loud or laugh too much.  Funny thing is I had an endoscopy just a couple days ago and my doc said the same thing.  All clear no cancer from your throat to your stomach.  I just happened to be there checking for Barrett's throat from many years of heartburn but figured I'd mention the strangling sensation.  He echoed your doc!

 

I rarely check posts anymore, just trying to live life and not think about much.  Been a bad bad day today with revving and spacey dizziness, so i guess I came for comfort.

 

Take care, I know the throat feeling all too well!

[[be...]]

But Beulah ... I can count the hair on my head ... all six of them ... 

 

 

[[Te...]]

Mike....I suffer with throat issues .....hate it...........it's weird how my throat pain...changes....from pill in throat....tightness........squeezing......or it can feel like someone is pushing in below Adams apple....throat has a super dry feeling when at its worse.....

The throat thing comes and goes......but at it bad times it last all day....

I too.....have had many test done......all fine.....

Hugs! TM

[[No...]]

Hi Folks ... just did an end of day / after dinner symptom storm ... a real blast from the past ... and it settled down again some ... this has now officially gotten old ... I am bored with this damn stuff ...

 

Okay ... the rant didn't make me feel better ... but at least my wrists loosened up some keypunching in the rant ... 

 

The throat stuff ... really a miserable symptom as some of us know ... I keep telling myself, rightly or wrongly, it has to do with the muscles and tendons in my neck ... as long as they remain unsettled this will keep going on for a while ... who knows ...

 

I have been cycling round the clock the last three days ... I am functional, but very miserable and starting to get grumpy again ... 

[[dr...]]

Ok nova...this is my last invite for dinner...I'm starting to think you don't like me.  Pan seared filets with garlic mashed cauliflower.  You in?  That'll hopefully end your uptick

[[Te...]]

Nova.......sending you some big....healing hugs!

 

TM

[[so...]]

Hi Buds,

 

Sorry so many of us are in the symptom stew today.  Certainly not as tasty as a stew Nova and Drew could whip up.  I've had crushing anxiety today, with all the crap that goes along with it.  A real poop goulash.

 

I'm wondering if it is backlash from the half a Unisom I took last night.  Here I find something that actually helps me with a symptom and I'm afraid it may cause some sort of anxiety rebound.  Anyone have experience with doxy Unisom?

 

Tomorrow has GOT to be better. 

 

I get some relief in the evenings.  Does anyone else cycle this way?

 

Wishing you all a sweet evening.

 

Love, Sofa

[[so...]]

Nova, I'm sending you strong healing energy.  Do you feel it?

[[No...]]

Drew ... what's not to like ... you just live in the wrong time zone ... once you make it over to the twilight zone where I spend most of my time we can do dinner ...

 

Enjoy ...

[[No...]]

TM and Sofa ... thanks for the hugs ... this healing sure is weird stuff sometimes ... anyway ... time to put the lights out here on the East Coast ... have a good evening ...

 

Sorry Sofa, don't know anything about the unisom ... I think Beulah and Green have used it ...

[[dr...]]

Hi Buds,

 

Sorry so many of us are in the symptom stew today.  Certainly not as tasty as a stew Nova and Drew could whip up.  I've had crushing anxiety today, with all the crap that goes along with it.  A real poop goulash.

 

I'm wondering if it is backlash from the half a Unisom I took last night.  Here I find something that actually helps me with a symptom and I'm afraid it may cause some sort of anxiety rebound.  Anyone have experience with doxy Unisom?

 

Tomorrow has GOT to be better. 

 

I get some relief in the evenings.  Does anyone else cycle this way?

 

Wishing you all a sweet evening.

 

Love, Sofa

 

I almost always feel better at night. It's common.

 

I've taken doxy and I had some cog fog the next morning but nothing more.

[[Si...]]

Sorry nova that you are feeling bad again. Last three days have been a bit better after my week in the ninth circle of hell. Been really busy so hasn't had much time to be on. Have to charge my phone now. I usually get off my phone or iPad around this time. Will check in with everyone tomorrow. Hate that some of you are having tough days and night.

[[Mi...]]

Nova,  I am in the EXACT SAME boat as you are!  The past three days I have been cycling through my sx also!  And yes other than my huge panic episode Saturday morning it has all been manageable BUT no fun at all!   

 

Sure hoping for calmer waters tomorrow! 

 

I had to laugh at myself tonight as I remembered the first time I experienced this air hunger sensation along with this throat stuff!  I for sure thought I was dying! Now tonight as it's happening at this very moment I am saying forget it! I am way to exhausted to deal with this sx and I am going to bed! 

 

Yep, I have come to the point now that I am actually talking to the muscles in my body lol!  I told them to have a ball!  They can do what ever they need to do but I am sleeping through it tonight!

I told my throat muscles fool me once shame on you! fool me twice shame on me! (  It's more like fool me a million times shame on me but you guys get it!  )    Right? 

 

Good night ya all!