Biting the hand that feeds you information and support

[Guest [Ob...]]

Myself and other buddies try to help others by answering their posts as best as possible. The title bar of these threads cite,  "please help...what do I do?"- generally speaking, that sort of thing. So you answer the post as per the info in the post. On several occasions what comes back is a really peeved off OP stating, "Well I've already tried that and it didn't work!. And furthermore....!!"  So, the OP kind of tells the person answering them off. My point? Maybe the OP should include the full information in the first post so people know that the OP tried something already, and maybe not get so totally ticked off when others are just trying to help. And finally, the OPs shouldn't be overly surprised in future when others quit answering their posts. Generally speaking, the majority of people do not enjoy getting their heads bitten off just for taking the time and effort to attempt to help. 

[[eg...]]

I suspect these people have benzo brain and are just doing the best they can.  All any one can ever do is give their best advice and then let the situation go.  Nobody is obliged to use our information.  I find when the people here (or anywhere else for that matter) are getting on my nerves, then it is time to take a break.

[Guest [Ob...]]

Hey ogling: So you feel that everyone here is kind of like a picnic short of a sandwich? Benzo induced of course. The benzo-addled picnic short of a sandwich brain syndrome. Too cute. We're all nuts for sure. Egg shell time for sure. If Lady Gaga can wear a dress made of raw meat, then I guess a little prickliness here and there is perfectly acceptable benzos or no benzos. Hey, how about a benzo w/d reality show? I wonder how that would look? Oh wait...didn't somebody already do that? The name of the show eludes me...oh dear...more benzo brain. Tick-tock...everyone getting better...well maybe. Just read a post about permanent brain damage. But what about pre-existing brain damage? Leave that to the scientists...the ones whose last priority is benzos...unfortunately no funding. The main thing that we keep TRYING to help. If that means helping people word their posts so that they get the maximum amount of support, then so be it. Hiding, retreating, doesn't generate much needed support. Rock on those who keep trying to help no matter what.

[[Be...]]

I think a lot of "us", myself included are still looking for that magic answer, and dont want to hear yet another word of advice about something that takes effort to do, because we're so tired.

I know myself, I am very blunt and to the point, it agitates me to pad my responses with all the sugar that I see most use on here, thats just me, but people misunderstand it, or take it wrong, because I dont drip sugar, and its got me into trouble with some people.

As for you, Obsid, its just my general observation about this thread, and your 2nd post, it seems to me that you will be seen as someone that started a thread, baited it, and then said what you wanted to say, covered up in a lot of sugar so you could get away with it.  Most here will probably simply see that you wanted to say you think everyone here is "one sandwich short of a picnic", in short you think they/we're crazy......I can see that many will take what you said this way.

Personally it doesn't bother me why you said what you said, but others will be offended, I can gaurantee you that.

 

[[Di...]]

I'm trying to understand the point to this thread Obsid. A lot of people who come to BB are at a point in their lives where they are feeling pretty desperate. They are searching for answers and are probably feeling pretty anxious, overwrought and generally just not thinking straight. Probably the last thing on their mind is the niceties of life.

 

You are criticising people who don't respond to posts as pleasantly as you think they should, yet your reply to eglong was pretty sarcastic, and bordering on the unpleasant. Perhaps it might be a good idea to give people a lot of leeway in how they post and respond to posts.

 

Going by the way you replied to eglong, perhaps the way you respond to the people who are asking for help might be why some people are getting a bit "ticked off" at you. Have you thought about that? Perhaps if you’re getting to the point of being aggravated by people it might be a good time to take a break from BB for a little while.

 

There have been many times where I have spent a great deal of time wording a very lengthy reply of advice and support to someone, only to have them not even say "thanks", but I tell myself that just because they don't reply doesn't mean that they haven't read my response and taken it on board. Maybe they are just having problems trying to process so much new information.

 

To be honest, I got so fed up with constantly going to great lengths of explaining the tapering method that I use, after being specifically asked for it and then not to get any acknowledgement of the effort, that I decided to just make one post to explain it and then just post a link to it in my signature. That saves me a lot of time and aggravation, but I am still helping people in the process, often without me even having to post anything. I've had a lot of people PM me saying how much my method has helped them, and I've never even spoken to them previously. That's a very nice feeling, and makes up for all the negative and none responses.

 

Maybe there are times when we all ask ourselves why we bother, especially if we get a terse response to something that we hoped would be helpful, but that doesn’t mean that any of us should stop trying to help. That's my only reason for being here these days.

 

[[ja...]]

Hey ogling: So you feel that everyone here is kind of like a picnic short of a sandwich? Benzo induced of course. The benzo-addled picnic short of a sandwich brain syndrome. Too cute. We're all nuts for sure. Egg shell time for sure. If Lady Gaga can wear a dress made of raw meat, then I guess a little prickliness here and there is perfectly acceptable benzos or no benzos. Hey, how about a benzo w/d reality show? I wonder how that would look? Oh wait...didn't somebody already do that? The name of the show eludes me...oh dear...more benzo brain. Tick-tock...everyone getting better...well maybe. Just read a post about permanent brain damage. But what about pre-existing brain damage? Leave that to the scientists...the ones whose last priority is benzos...unfortunately no funding. The main thing that we keep TRYING to help. If that means helping people word their posts so that they get the maximum amount of support, then so be it. Hiding, retreating, doesn't generate much needed support. Rock on those who keep trying to help no matter what.

This made me laugh ... Bite the hand that feeds you much !

 

~Jenny

[[Bi...]]

I find that 75% of people do not listen to my advice anyhow or if they listen it's 6 months later after they crashed real hard and then they are all ears!    Most of the time I do not click on the NOTIFY button any longer. I figure that if someone wants to talk to me they will send me a PM and they do

 

Obsid -  Maybe you should end each post with this message  "if your interested in more help send me a PM"    Those people who are interested will write you and follow you back out onto the forum.  Forum relationships take work too just like any relationship.  Also we all kind of 'ON DRUGS' here so we should forgive each other.  Everyone here is struggling with w/d issues.

 

LEARN TO FORGIVE :smitten: :smitten:

[[De...]]

Obsid I find your posts very interesting Haven't quite

figured you out yet Keep up with the offerings of

Help ?