10 Best Things About Benzo Withdrawal

[[gu...]]

Enough negativity....here are the 10 best things about withdrawal.

 

1. Early Retirement- you can't work, so you might as well enjoy the time off

 

2. There's always music in the air- (well, some people call it tinnitus). It's more like one note being played endlessly. But hey, some people think rap is just noise.

 

3. Your computer skills vastly improve. You'll spend so much time on forums and researching benzo sites on the internet, your speed and efficiency will double in a month.

 

4. You won't waste valuable hours of your life sleeping. You'll now know the exact time your morning paper is delivered. If you watch out the window at night, you'll learn the interesting habits of nocturnal animals, and see what time your neighbors go to bed and get up.

 

5. Out of body experiences- why go through the annoying chore of dying on the operating table when you can just go through benzo withdrawal.

 

6. Save big money on vacations- A trip to the mailbox or to the grocery store is an adventure on its own. Will you panic, will you freeze up, will you sit down and cry...who knows what's around that corner.

 

7. Exercise? Who needs no stinkin' exercise! Your muscles will feel like you just ran a marathon, yet all you did was get out of bed and go to the bathroom.

 

8. Learn how much your spouse and/or family really loves you. Enough said.

 

9. Relive your ill-spent youth- Withdrawal can feel like an LSD trip. Might as well live it up. Crank up that old Woodstock album on the turntable, put on your best pair of bell bottoms, stick some flowers in your hair, and peace out, dudes.

 

10. Save money on vitamins, supplements, herbs, coffee, and alcohol- basically everything you USED to enjoy. All of them rev up your symptoms so you can't take em anymore.

 

Well, that's my top 10 list. Feel free to add your own....and enjoy this happy time

[[al...]]

Hey GuitarBob,

 

Well done. Very funny!

 

Thanks for the laugh.

 

Kelley

[[qb...]]

LMAO!  I so needed that.  Really struggling this morning, crying all morning, and this made me laugh hilariously while im crying.

 

Thank you!

 

Brian

[[wo...]]

I was just thinking the other day how maybe being stupid isn't so bad...because I'm sort of the "Happy Idiot" at present. 

..does that count as one???

[[Be...]]

Enough negativity....here are the 10 best things about withdrawal.

 

1. Early Retirement- you can't work, so you might as well enjoy the time off

 

2. There's always music in the air- (well, some people call it tinnitus). It's more like one note being played endlessly. But hey, some people think rap is just noise.

 

3. Your computer skills vastly improve. You'll spend so much time on forums and researching benzo sites on the internet, your speed and efficiency will double in a month.

 

4. You won't waste valuable hours of your life sleeping. You'll now know the exact time your morning paper is delivered. If you watch out the window at night, you'll learn the interesting habits of nocturnal animals, and see what time your neighbors go to bed and get up.

 

5. Out of body experiences- why go through the annoying chore of dying on the operating table when you can just go through benzo withdrawal.

 

6. Save big money on vacations- A trip to the mailbox or to the grocery store is an adventure on its own. Will you panic, will you freeze up, will you sit down and cry...who knows what's around that corner.

 

7. Exercise? Who needs no stinkin' exercise! Your muscles will feel like you just ran a marathon, yet all you did was get out of bed and go to the bathroom.

 

8. Learn how much your spouse and/or family really loves you. Enough said.

 

9. Relive your ill-spent youth- Withdrawal can feel like an LSD trip. Might as well live it up. Crank up that old Woodstock album on the turntable, put on your best pair of bell bottoms, stick some flowers in your hair, and peace out, dudes.

 

10. Save money on vitamins, supplements, herbs, coffee, and alcohol- basically everything you USED to enjoy. All of them rev up your symptoms so you can't take em anymore.

 

Well, that's my top 10 list. Feel free to add your own....and enjoy this happy time

 

That is the best "re-framing" of the benzo withdrawal experience I've ever seen.    I'd add to it but not thinking too clearly today.  (If I were, I'd think of a way to turn it into a postive; I'm sure there's a way.  )

[[wo...]]

I have another ...my hair grew extra long because I was too sick to wash and dry it! It also formed ringlets   I'm a regular benzo beauty!

[[gu...]]

How about this....

 

11. Feel like a celebrity- Be proud to be in rehab or detox. Join the growing ranks of the rich and famous who fell off the edge, the likes of which include Robert Downey Jr., Britney Spears, and Lindsey Lohan. Change the message on your answering machine to say, "Sorry, I can't come to the phone right now. I'm in detox."  Wear it proudly like a badge!

[[wo...]]

..my DR is so bad that people who hug me get a contact high. .....Hey Bob we need a comedic drum and top hat/symbal sound here..

[[ha...]]

Good job!  I love this. Brilliant!

[[tr...]]

Enough negativity....here are the 10 best things about withdrawal.

 

1. Early Retirement- you can't work, so you might as well enjoy the time off

 

2. There's always music in the air- (well, some people call it tinnitus). It's more like one note being played endlessly. But hey, some people think rap is just noise.

 

3. Your computer skills vastly improve. You'll spend so much time on forums and researching benzo sites on the internet, your speed and efficiency will double in a month.

 

4. You won't waste valuable hours of your life sleeping. You'll now know the exact time your morning paper is delivered. If you watch out the window at night, you'll learn the interesting habits of nocturnal animals, and see what time your neighbors go to bed and get up.

 

5. Out of body experiences- why go through the annoying chore of dying on the operating table when you can just go through benzo withdrawal.

 

6. Save big money on vacations- A trip to the mailbox or to the grocery store is an adventure on its own. Will you panic, will you freeze up, will you sit down and cry...who knows what's around that corner.

 

7. Exercise? Who needs no stinkin' exercise! Your muscles will feel like you just ran a marathon, yet all you did was get out of bed and go to the bathroom.

 

8. Learn how much your spouse and/or family really loves you. Enough said.

 

9. Relive your ill-spent youth- Withdrawal can feel like an LSD trip. Might as well live it up. Crank up that old Woodstock album on the turntable, put on your best pair of bell bottoms, stick some flowers in your hair, and peace out, dudes.

 

10. Save money on vitamins, supplements, herbs, coffee, and alcohol- basically everything you USED to enjoy. All of them rev up your symptoms so you can't take em anymore.

 

Well, that's my top 10 list. Feel free to add your own....and enjoy this happy time

 

:2funny:  The best I've read!    I'm looking forward to reading more!  I'm not very creative right now but I'll work on it.  Keep up the good work!

[[...]]

BOB I love YA this is the best OMG I love it.

 

Thank you  :2funny: This day was so horrible until right now. 

 

Jan THE KID

 

[[la...]]

Ditto on what everyone else has said!  This made me laugh out loud!    :2funny:

 

 

[[gu...]]

I have another ...my hair grew extra long because I was too sick to wash and dry it! It also formed ringlets   I'm a regular benzo beauty!

 

Okay, this doesn't count cos everyone else's hair has fallen OUT and we do Not feel beautiful (or handsome) We curse your "extra long ringlets", Oh Woman of Wonder.

[[...]]

I have another ...my hair grew extra long because I was too sick to wash and dry it! It also formed ringlets   I'm a regular benzo beauty!

 

Okay, this doesn't count cos everyone else's hair has fallen OUT and we do Not feel beautiful (or handsome) We curse your "extra long ringlets", Oh Woman of Wonder.

BOB? :oMy hair didn't fall out YET but BOB? I got a unicorn growing :'( :laugh:NO JOKE I got a major lump on my head and instead of an angel halo I got a unicorn. I even went to the doctor and he said NO worries but heck I got a UNICORN what do ya make of it?

[[gu...]]

BOB? :oMy hair didn't fall out YET but BOB? I got a unicorn growing :'( :laugh:NO JOKE I got a major lump on my head and instead of an angel halo I got a unicorn. I even went to the doctor and he said NO worries but heck I got a UNICORN what do ya make of it?

 

Hmmmm, Unicorn, huh?  Mythical Greek creature....well, it beats turning into a Satyr. You can always wear a hat, but it's hard to hide having a goat butt.

[[...]]

BOB? :oMy hair didn't fall out YET but BOB? I got a unicorn growing :'( :laugh:NO JOKE I got a major lump on my head and instead of an angel halo I got a unicorn. I even went to the doctor and he said NO worries but heck I got a UNICORN what do ya make of it?

 

Hmmmm, Unicorn, huh?  Mythical Greek creature....well, it beats turning into a Satyr. You can always wear a hat, but it's hard to hide having a goat butt.

Good morning Bob :2funny:thanks for the input

 

[[Lo...]]

ROFLMAO.. this is hands down the best post ever. this should be made a sticky post!

[[wo...]]

I have another ...my hair grew extra long because I was too sick to wash and dry it! It also formed ringlets   I'm a regular benzo beauty!

 

Okay, this doesn't count cos everyone else's hair has fallen OUT and we do Not feel beautiful (or handsome) We curse your "extra long ringlets", Oh Woman of Wonder.

 

Hey Bob, did I mention that my body hair turned white and then fell out and now I don't need to shave my legs anymore.. :laugh:

[[gu...]]

Well, at least you don't have ringlets of white body hair. (you're not a sasquatch, are you? )

[[wo...]]

Well, at least you don't have ringlets of white body hair. (you're not a sasquatch, are you? )

 

Oh the temptation is so great to say, "why yes Bob, I am a sasquatch"    ....oooops did I just say that outloud???

[[st...]]

My goodness, Bob.  Nothing more that I can add but to say thank you for the gut laugh. 

 

Patty  xo

[[gu...]]

My goodness, Bob.  Nothing more that I can add but to say thank you for the gut laugh.   

 

Patty  xo

 

I'm happy that many people enjoyed it. No one pm'd me to tell me to lay off the funny stuff, so I guess I'm okay to continue my (so called) witty repartee....."the lighter side of misery"

[[tr...]]

My goodness, Bob.  Nothing more that I can add but to say thank you for the gut laugh.   

 

Patty  xo

 

I'm happy that many people enjoyed it. No one pm'd me to tell me to lay off the funny stuff, so I guess I'm okay to continue my (so called) witty repartee....."the lighter side of misery"

 

Funny stuff is always welcomed!  Keep up the good work! 

[[Lo...]]

My goodness, Bob.  Nothing more that I can add but to say thank you for the gut laugh.   

 

Patty  xo

 

I'm happy that many people enjoyed it. No one pm'd me to tell me to lay off the funny stuff, so I guess I'm okay to continue my (so called) witty repartee....."the lighter side of misery"

 

its nice to see you can maintain a witt sharp as a knife thru your rollercoaster ride

[[sk...]]

LOL Bob,

 

thanks for the laugh, is always needed in my benzo world.

 

 

You can save money on batteries for that vibrator, when you're whole body never stops trembling. The energizer bunny that keeps on going.

 

 

Better than Viagra, you can't relax enough to ever let your body go limp.

 

(oh boy I think my minds really in the gutter now yikes, I'm sure this will be deleted as I go hide now)