Frizz

[[Fr...]]

Hi BB, and congratulations for 20 years of service, help and hope to those wanting to be free from Benzos!

I was known as "Frizz". My journey out of benzos begin in 2009, having started on another forum that I became a moderator. That forum ended three years later and I was given advice to join Benzo Buddies. I joined up and am happy to say that I have continued to stay free since May of 2011, over 13 yrs ago.  I still have three friends I met here, and they too are still living free from Benzos. WE all made it out through the valuable help we received here, determination, support of each other, family and the grace of God.

Since my Freedom day, I have enjoyed new grandchildren being born, traveling, love of life again and hope renewed. I have gone through cancer, recovery, three surgeries, loss of loved ones and endured battles of my body, yet I am still here. Benzos was one of the worst things I have ever endured, as it took away my freedom. I am still smiling for the joy on that day is forever here. 

My mind thinks often of the many friends I met here, and glad I still have contact with the three..if you remember me, let me know. I haven't forgotten you....

To you that are in the battle for freedom from Benzos, I salute you as an old warrior, press on, you will get through this, one day at a time, keeping on, keeping on. Never say never, I am proof that you can have a life back.  Love, from Frizz

[[Pa...]]

Hey @[Fr...], thank you for coming back to let us know life goes on and it can be full of joy.  Are there still challenges, absolutely but having a clear mind not clouded by the fear this process heaps on us makes it all manageable.  

Congratulations on your recovery. 

[[Co...]]

Hi @[Fr...]

It is good to see so many old faces return and post an update.

It seems that you have been through a lot since you quit 13 years ago. I hope you are fully recovered now.

It might not be immediately apparent to everyone going through this now, but there are positives to experiencing heartache and grief too. If we are still taking benzodiazepines, we likely would be largely numb to these things. On the surface, this might seem attractive, but it means that we miss out on the joys of life too, and only defers things like grief until we do quit. Or, at least, that's my experience.

Although grief is difficult, when benzo-free, we have clearer memories of the good times and better access to our positive emotions too. I would never go back to that twilight existence.

[[Fr...]]

Thank you Colin. It is so true! Although I have endured many things since my recovery from benzos, I feel things again, joys and sorrows. So much better than no emotions, constant torment, lack of sleep, energy and being numb. I smile with joy to how beautiful life is, and so grateful to have chosen the path of freedom. I appreciate that you continue to help others, and I thank you for founding this forum. 

With the best to you... a friend from the past,

Frizz

[[Co...]]

30 minutes ago, [[F...] said:

With the best to you... a friend from the past,

Frizz

And to you, Frizz.

Colin.

[[Rh...]]

It is simply amazing to hear from people that have since been long “recovered” and the peace it brings to me, to know that one day I too will share in this feeling, is overwhelming!  I am so happy you’re loving life and feeling life to the fullest!  All the ups and downs, happiness and sadness, joys and sorrows are what life is meant to be.  There will be many tough times, but experiencing those and learning to cope with them without meds is a gift!

again, congrats and THANK YOU for sharing your story!  

[[pi...]]

Hello from one old(er) warrior to another @[Fr...]! 

I completely agree with you about feeling all of life’s emotions. Good and not so good. We as humans are capable of these highs and lows, drugs can simply numb us and prevent us from dealing with life’s complexities. 

You’ve been through a lot but still have a lot of life to look forward to. I wish you all the best, thanks for this message of hope!

[[Fr...]]

Thank you for all your responses. While I am years beyond those days I suffered, I have not forgotten the many that supported me through that time. My gratitude remains, as many that supported me were in there own suffering too. 

To you that still are here, be encouraged at any progress you make. I have dozens of paintings that I painted during that time. I wrote and wrote, making journals, and diving deep into living life as best as I was able. Going to the grocery store was a giant step at that time, but I kept going, fighting that urge to recluse in my home. I longed to feel normal. I kept going forward. There were setbacks, as even now, I have other physical issues that come to all as we age, but my faith sustains me, as it did during my benzo recovery days.

As I look at the beauty that I was able to create during that madness, it proves that even in our lowest of times, beaten down physically, mentally, and feeling our spirits being drained dry, beauty can come from the ashes of defeat. In some way as I painted, the pain was pushed back, hope was renewed as I found a way to have some peace in the storm of benzo recovery. You will look back at your life someday and see the strength that came when the battle was won. 

I hope that anyone on this forum that reads this can have hope in my story. I am a living testimony that there is light coming to anyone willing to push back the darkness of this soul consuming suffering.

God bless you as you keep on, keeping on!

Frizz

[[Rh...]]

3 hours ago, [[F...] said:

Thank you for all your responses. While I am years beyond those days I suffered, I have not forgotten the many that supported me through that time. My gratitude remains, as many that supported me were in there own suffering too. 

To you that still are here, be encouraged at any progress you make. I have dozens of paintings that I painted during that time. I wrote and wrote, making journals, and diving deep into living life as best as I was able. Going to the grocery store was a giant step at that time, but I kept going, fighting that urge to recluse in my home. I longed to feel normal. I kept going forward. There were setbacks, as even now, I have other physical issues that come to all as we age, but my faith sustains me, as it did during my benzo recovery days.

As I look at the beauty that I was able to create during that madness, it proves that even in our lowest of times, beaten down physically, mentally, and feeling our spirits being drained dry, beauty can come from the ashes of defeat. In some way as I painted, the pain was pushed back, hope was renewed as I found a way to have some peace in the storm of benzo recovery. You will look back at your life someday and see the strength that came when the battle was won. 

I hope that anyone on this forum that reads this can have hope in my story. I am a living testimony that there is light coming to anyone willing to push back the darkness of this soul consuming suffering.

God bless you as you keep on, keeping on!

Frizz

Again, so well written and full of much needed encouragement!  Thank you!