Can I take Valium again?

[[do...]]

I stopped diazepam after years of daily use.  I never want to touch it again.  I also stopped pain meds at the same time.  Withdrawal was terrible, now it’s fine.  I knew the day would come when I’d be prescribed these things again.  I’m supposed to have a procedure that involves a deep incision and I can’t be under anesthesia for medical reasons.  So the doc gave me a script for pain meds and Valium to sedate me without anesthesia.  I told him I didn’t want to take them.  He said that’s fine.  I’m getting a little nervous about having surgery awake with nothing but lidocaine.  I don’t know what will happen if I take it but I don’t really want to find out.  I’ll have other procedures in the future so it will come up again and I wont always be able to decline it.  I am pretty sure I can do it without meds.  Has anyone had to take a benzo or pain med after withdrawal?

Edited July 29 by [do...]

[[do...]]

And fyi I didn’t ask my doctor bc these were prescribed for a medical need but I was physically dependent.  I stopped without supervision and didn’t tell anyone other than to delete them once I stopped.  I don’t want anyone documenting drug dependence bc I don’t want to be treated like I’m drug seeking if I need medical attention for pain.  It’s been 4 months since my last dose of either medication.  

[[Ma...]]

No, you really shouldn’t. Ask for propofol. 

[[do...]]

Thank you! Yeah I can’t get cardiac clearance to get something like propofol or other higher risk anesthesia.  Even nitris oxide isn’t a great idea.  So benzos are preferred.  I think I can decline being sedated this time, but not forever.  Has anyone had this come up?   

[[PE...]]

I think once is ok but a whole script? Why not just take it when you are on the operation table? 

I did take a zopiclone once when in hospital. 

Edited July 29 by [PE...]

[[do...]]

Thank you!  I guess I don’t know if withdrawal symptoms will start again.  That’s the only reason I don’t want to.  You did fine in the hospital?  I think if I got pain meds or benzos inpatient it would be ok, but maybe not sent home with them after a dose.  I do still have 2 big bottles of oxy and diazepam and I’ve never touched them.  I think I needed to remember I don’t take them bc I choose not to.  I also needed some sense of safety knowing if pain / muscle contractions got too bad I could treat it.  I know that’s not how everyone would go through this process but it worked for me.  I’m just worried I can’t trust myself if  that addiction got triggered 

[[PE...]]

45 minutes ago, [[d...] said:

Thank you!  I guess I don’t know if withdrawal symptoms will start again.  That’s the only reason I don’t want to.  You did fine in the hospital?  I think if I got pain meds or benzos inpatient it would be ok, but maybe not sent home with them after a dose.  I do still have 2 big bottles of oxy and diazepam and I’ve never touched them.  I think I needed to remember I don’t take them bc I choose not to.  I also needed some sense of safety knowing if pain / muscle contractions got too bad I could treat it.  I know that’s not how everyone would go through this process but it worked for me.  I’m just worried I can’t trust myself if  that addiction got triggered 

I was fine. 

I never could have stopped taking it while having the stuff at home..

Ok so you had a opiate addiction?