Help please

[[Pa...]]

It sounds like it might be time to begin your taper, the fear and ruminations will be with you throughout this process so you can't let them stop you. 

Remember what we say about being stable, it doesn't mean feeling good, it means being able to take care of your basic needs and your symptoms have quit changing drastically, they're still there but they've settled into predictable misery. 

[[Li...]]

4 minutes ago, [[P...] said:

It sounds like it might be time to begin your taper, the fear and ruminations will be with you throughout this process so you can't let them stop you. 

Remember what we say about being stable, it doesn't mean feeling good, it means being able to take care of your basic needs and your symptoms have quit changing drastically, they're still there but they've settled into predictable misery. 

But I don't feel stable meaning I have no energy to go about my day. I have a hard time doing things or focusing, sometimes I can't talk. IDK what to do or if I'm ready. Should I give it until Saturday? 

[[Li...]]

Just a little confused because on this thread I was told to wait possibly longer then 2 weeks. Just confused. Thank you again for being here 

[[Pa...]]

By all means, wait until you feel ready, I was just going by the description of your overall adaptation to the 3 doses, it sounds like you've achieved relief from interdose withdrawal.  And since you were questioning tolerance, I thought you were getting nervous about being on your dose for this long.

Your symptoms sound very unpleasant but it doesn't sound like they prevent you from functioning at the most basic level.  Are you miserable, absolutely, but can you function?

And as far as the timeframe goes, we're all so different, we give general guidelines but we can't know what is right for you.  If waiting feels better to you, then of course, follow your body's cues. 

[[Em...]]

Hi Lily,

I just read your whole thread. I am so sorry to see how miserable you have been ❤ keep your head up and don't lose hope. You will get through this.

I have to mention something. I have tried multible SSRI's over the years. Not Paxil though, and not familiar with it. But some of your symptoms might very well be related to your brain getting used to the SSRI. Most of them don't fully work until after 8 weeks, sometimes more. Maybe this will calm some of your worries, it might not all be related to the benzo.

That being said I whole heartedly support your decision to try and come off of the atvian as soon as possible.

All the best to you 💫

[[Li...]]

17 minutes ago, [[P...] said:

By all means, wait until you feel ready, I was just going by the description of your overall adaptation to the 3 doses, it sounds like you've achieved relief from interdose withdrawal.  And since you were questioning tolerance, I thought you were getting nervous about being on your dose for this long.

Your symptoms sound very unpleasant but it doesn't sound like they prevent you from functioning at the most basic level.  Are you miserable, absolutely, but can you function?

And as far as the timeframe goes, we're all so different, we give general guidelines but we can't know what is right for you.  If waiting feels better to you, then of course, follow your body's cues. 

Will someone be able to help me with a taper plan hopefully by this weekend? Do I need a scale just yet? 

[[Li...]]

12 minutes ago, [[E...] said:

Hi Lily,

I just read your whole thread. I am so sorry to see how miserable you have been ❤ keep your head up and don't lose hope. You will get through this.

I have to mention something. I have tried multible SSRI's over the years. Not Paxil though, and not familiar with it. But some of your symptoms might very well be related to your brain getting used to the SSRI. Most of them don't fully work until after 8 weeks, sometimes more. Maybe this will calm some of your worries, it might not all be related to the benzo.

That being said I whole heartedly support your decision to try and come off of the atvian as soon as possible.

All the best to you 💫

Thank you so much for reaching out.I have thought of this. I just think the side effects are too severe for it to only be Paxil. I'm hoping I have no major issues with this taper. 

[[Li...]]

2 minutes ago, [[L...] said:

Will someone be able to help me with a taper plan hopefully by this weekend? Do I need a scale just yet? 

I can function mostly after 2pm until bedtime. Then it's nutty again throughout the night into mornings and afternoon 

[[Em...]]

1 minute ago, [[L...] said:

Thank you so much for reaching out.I have thought of this. I just think the side effects are too severe for it to only be Paxil. I'm hoping I have no major issues with this taper. 

You are so welcome,

Believe me, they can be very extreme. Even from a small dose. But in my experience SSRI's tend to level out after about two months. But the nausea, interupted sleep and the constant fear sound so typical SSRI side effects to me. I just had to mention it to you.

Of course I am not a doctor, just sharing my thoughts.

 

You will be fine. Try to think "this is only a thought.. I dont have to believe it" when the scary thoughts come.

I have full faith that the tapering from atvian will be relatively short and not that painful for you. I feel like its also the SSRI messing with your head and system right now. Stay strong and set up a goal for yourself. If you feel like you are stabilized and functional begin your taper. You will feel better when you are empowered and feel you are in control.

All the best 💖

[[Li...]]

5 minutes ago, [[E...] said:

You are so welcome,

Believe me, they can be very extreme. Even from a small dose. But in my experience SSRI's tend to level out after about two months. But the nausea, interupted sleep and the constant fear sound so typical SSRI side effects to me. I just had to mention it to you.

Of course I am not a doctor, just sharing my thoughts.

You will be fine. Try to think "this is only a thought.. I dont have to believe it" when the scary thoughts come.

I have full faith that the tapering from atvian will be relatively short and not that painful for you. I feel like its also the SSRI messing with your head and system right now. Stay strong and set up a goal for yourself. If you feel like you are stabilized and functional begin your taper. You will feel better when you are empowered and feel you are in control.

All the best 💖

Thank you.  This has been going on before the SSRI Though. And sometimes I can't function 

[[Em...]]

I am so sorry 💔

This life is not easy at all is it?

I don't know your background or medical history but I can relate to a lot of what you've shared here.

I feel like our society is built up on diagnoses and pills. That's really all that doctors are trained in and do, and we go to the doctors and trust them when something is wrong. They give us pills. But most of the time we really need something else/more like therapy, relationships, hugs, friendships... better habits.

I am not trying to undermine your doctor or your condition at all. Sometimes we need the pills. Preferably for a short time, sometimes for longer... but we also need to try and find the root of the problem and deal with it. It takes time and energy and the doctors don't have any training in that. They more often think the pills are the one and only magic cure.

I hope the paxil will work for you. I would give it as long time as it says in the instructions to have "full effect" and then revaluate if you feel better than before it or not. Try not to over worry about the benzo, just deal with it as soon as you feel like you can. You will be able to do that.

Take good care of yourself and believe that you will be okay. For me it has worked best to be around friends, not spend too much time on the internet, more time in nature and generally on the move. Having the cats around is probably very healing for you ❤

Good luck with everything, 

Emily

[[Pa...]]

1 hour ago, [[L...] said:

I can function mostly after 2pm until bedtime. Then it's nutty again throughout the night into mornings and afternoon 

This sounds like the morning cortisol surge is making life difficult.  But yes, if you decide to start your taper, we can help and as for the scale, it all depends on your skill at cutting your pills, do you have a razor blade or pill cutter?  It probably wouldn't be a bad idea to order a scale if that's the route you think you'll be taking. 

[[Li...]]

1 hour ago, [[P...] said:

This sounds like the morning cortisol surge is making life difficult.  But yes, if you decide to start your taper, we can help and as for the scale, it all depends on your skill at cutting your pills, do you have a razor blade or pill cutter?  It probably wouldn't be a bad idea to order a scale if that's the route you think you'll be taking.    I don't know what route to take or anything about taper . This is so scary

[[Li...]]

3 hours ago, [[L...] said:

4 hours ago, [[P...] said:

This sounds like the morning cortisol surge is making life difficult.  But yes, if you decide to start your taper, we can help and as for the scale, it all depends on your skill at cutting your pills, do you have a razor blade or pill cutter?  It probably wouldn't be a bad idea to order a scale if that's the route you think you'll be taking.    I don't know what route to take or anything about taper . This is so scary 

[[Li...]]

2 hours ago, [[L...] said:

 

Yes, I have a pill cuter and a razor blade. Not sure what scale to use or method that would be best for me. It's so overwhelming and scary. Thank you once again 

[[Pa...]]

@[Li...], even though you've only used Ativan for a short time, we've come to the conclusion you won't be able to do a fast taper so now its time to decide how you want to proceed.

Some people are comfortable with cutting their pills, without using anything other than a pill cutter, razor blade or file for eyeballing little piles, other needs a bit more precision.  Whether that precision is needed for physical reasons, as in, they can actually tell if their dose isn't exactly the amount they intended or if its mental, meaning they feel more comfortable being precise.  Either is fine, but confidence in your chosen method is important.  Now, once you begin your taper, you may decide its not working and want to go in a different direction, this is normal.  This is an experiment with you as the subject so adjustments and changes are part of the process.

Some people feel liquid titration is the easier way to go, rather than crushing and weighing their tablets, have you checked out any YouTube video's of liquid titration?  

Just so you know, Ativan is available in the US in liquid form, if you can get your doctor to write you a script. 

 

 

Titration - BenzoBuddies - Benzodiazepine Withdrawal Support

[[Li...]]

1 hour ago, [[P...] said:

@[Li...], even though you've only used Ativan for a short time, we've come to the conclusion you won't be able to do a fast taper so now its time to decide how you want to proceed.

Some people are comfortable with cutting their pills, without using anything other than a pill cutter, razor blade or file for eyeballing little piles, other needs a bit more precision.  Whether that precision is needed for physical reasons, as in, they can actually tell if their dose isn't exactly the amount they intended or if its mental, meaning they feel more comfortable being precise.  Either is fine, but confidence in your chosen method is important.  Now, once you begin your taper, you may decide its not working and want to go in a different direction, this is normal.  This is an experiment with you as the subject so adjustments and changes are part of the process.

Some people feel liquid titration is the easier way to go, rather than crushing and weighing their tablets, have you checked out any YouTube video's of liquid titration?  

Just so you know, Ativan is available in the US in liquid form, if you can get your doctor to write you a script. 

Titration - BenzoBuddies - Benzodiazepine Withdrawal Support

Thank you Pam. Is it possible to feel worse or maybe better while tapering ? I'm getting scarred. I will be buying a scale this weekend 

[[El...]]

@[Li...] I just thought I would comment briefly.  I have tapered successfully using a scale from 3 mg to 0.45 mg.  I am now probably going to switch to the liquid formulation.  Handing such small pill fragments  is getting "tricky" and I am finding it is becoming increasingly more difficult to make the small reductions I would like.  I sort of wish I had started with the liquid formation earlier, but my insurance does not cover it (for some odd reason).  Also, I tried a "home-brewed" water titration, but was largely unsuccessful.  I never could determine an exact cause for its failure...probably just my odd body chemistry?!

But if you should decide to use either a "home-brew" or the liquid formulation, you should plan to hold while transitioning to either.  Some have reported difficulties changing from the pill to a liquid and you would probably be wise to hold while you give your body time to adjust.

[[Li...]]

How much am I shaving off each pull to start? I'm assuming I'm cutting the .5 in half?

[[Li...]]

Just now, [[L...] said:

How much am I shaving off each pull to start? I'm assuming I'm cutting the .5 in half?

Pill typo

[[Li...]]

I'm coming back to write again because I've never done this before and I'm just so confused. I actually don't know what the right method is for me to taper. The water taper looks confusing as well.  I'm hoping for some feedback as I would just rather weigh them because it makes more sense to me since i'm taking the pill that way to start. However  if others have had a smoother transaction with water please let me know.  Thanks everyone 

[[El...]]

@[Li...] Try not to stress about your tapering method. I think the best taper method is the one you feel most comfortable using.  If you feel uneasy about using a liquid and feel best continuing with the pills, you will probably be most successful with the pills.  As you grow more comfortable tapering and you eventually think another method might work better at a later point, you can always change.  So, please don't worry!

[[Li...]]

13 minutes ago, [[E...] said:

@[Li...] Try not to stress about your tapering method. I think the best taper method is the one you feel most comfortable using.  If you feel uneasy about using a liquid and feel best continuing with the pills, you will probably be most successful with the pills.  As you grow more comfortable tapering and you eventually think another method might work better at a later point, you can always change.  So, please don't worry!

Thanks Ellie. I'm trying my best.  Things are not as bad the past few days. Sleep is still horrible and mornings.  How much should i start cutting on each pill? All 3 doses I cut correct ?  Scale should be here Sunday and I'm thinking about starting Tuesday or Wed.  I just wanted to start preparing. Hope you have a beautiful day

[[Pa...]]

@[Li...], you can cut whatever dose you want or all three, its entirely up to you.  If your mornings are rough, you can leave that one a little larger for now, or if sleep is a problem, you can leave that one and whittle away at the other two.  Its all about your needs.  Of course, they eventually all have to go but you might as well use them while you can.

[[Li...]]

4 minutes ago, [[P...] said:

@[Li...], you can cut whatever dose you want or all three, its entirely up to you.  If your mornings are rough, you can leave that one a little larger for now, or if sleep is a problem, you can leave that one and whittle away at the other two.  Its all about your needs.  Of course, they eventually all have to go but you might as well use them while you can.

Thank you.  Am I cutting a  percentage of each pill? I'm not sure how much i'm supposed to take off and then weigh them. My apologies I really need help with this