I'm pretty sure my brain is damaged.

[[be...]]

sorry for posting again.

 

I mean if it is just GABA related, I should be anxious too. But I'm not. I'm just sooooooooo angry and mad at my physical symptoms.

 

The swelling brain like sensation, electricity in the head, shaking vision, and overstimulation when looking at the phone/computer screen... they never get better. And I have read lots of stuff about the swelling brain sensation and vibrating vision on reddit. Many people get serverely  protracted for years for the symptoms and I cant believe that I have rhis one for being on xanax for just a month.

 

Im pretty sure that my CNS is damaged and it is seperate from the GABA receptors. It should heal by itself no matter how my GABA receptors heal. Otherwise it doesnt make sense that I'm not really anxious at all.

Edited July 16 by [be...]

[[Ma...]]

Have you read the Ashton Manual about what to expect, what symptoms are associated with withdrawal?

Someone here can hopefully provide that part for you to put your mind at ease that 1.) What you are experiencing is normal and, 2.) It’s temporary-all temporary.

GABA down regulation is a key component but your entire nervous system-central, autonomic, sympathetic, parasympathetic, somatic are all affected.

jenswanphd has terrific posts on YouTube explaining everything. She says it’s like men in yellow hats are at work working on healing your entire system. So, let’s say today you are experiencing dizziness-that symptom represents what is being worked on. So your symptoms are going to wax and wane, come and go. It’s all non-linear. Unpredictable.

You are not damaged. Instead you have an injury, an injury that is healing except you can’t see it.

Doom and gloom are a symptom but it’s extremely important you don’t add fear to fear.

It’s also extremely important to practice mindfulness. To observe, bear witness with a sense of curiosity to what is happening. Baylissa talks in depth about this on her site.

Look, no amount of anxiety is going to change tomorrow or your future. None.

Is this terrifying? Yes. Does it end? YES.

You will heal. This is not the end of your story but you have to be a co-creator of your healing.

Don’t just list your fears here. Research on Baylissa and Jennifer Leigh’s sites. Watch jenswanphd on YouTube. Read Success Stories. Create a tool box to manage your symptoms and take that with you in life so you’ll be able to cope with any and everything that life throws at you in the future.

Take it one step at a time, 1 moment at a time and above all not only believe in your own healing, be kind to yourself.

Let time pass with courage and grace. You will get there.

P.S.

I would suggest staying off Reddit. It’s not helpful.

Edited July 16 by [Ma...]

[[S_...]]

@[Ma...] will we get our old selfs back ?

[[vo...]]

5 hours ago, [[M...] said:

Have you read the Ashton Manual about what to expect, what symptoms are associated with withdrawal?

Someone here can hopefully provide that part for you to put your mind at ease that 1.) What you are experiencing is normal and, 2.) It’s temporary-all temporary.

GABA down regulation is a key component but your entire nervous system-central, autonomic, sympathetic, parasympathetic, somatic are all affected.

jenswanphd has terrific posts on YouTube explaining everything. She says it’s like men in yellow hats are at work working on healing your entire system. So, let’s say today you are experiencing dizziness-that symptom represents what is being worked on. So your symptoms are going to wax and wane, come and go. It’s all non-linear. Unpredictable.

You are not damaged. Instead you have an injury, an injury that is healing except you can’t see it.

Doom and gloom are a symptom but it’s extremely important you don’t add fear to fear.

It’s also extremely important to practice mindfulness. To observe, bear witness with a sense of curiosity to what is happening. Baylissa talks in depth about this on her site.

Look, no amount of anxiety is going to change tomorrow or your future. None.

Is this terrifying? Yes. Does it end? YES.

You will heal. This is not the end of your story but you have to be a co-creator of your healing.

Don’t just list your fears here. Research on Baylissa and Jennifer Leigh’s sites. Watch jenswanphd on YouTube. Read Success Stories. Create a tool box to manage your symptoms and take that with you in life so you’ll be able to cope with any and everything that life throws at you in the future.

Take it one step at a time, 1 moment at a time and above all not only believe in your own healing, be kind to yourself.

Let time pass with courage and grace. You will get there.

P.S.

I would suggest staying off Reddit. It’s not helpful.

@[Ma...] I love this!

[[Ma...]]

@[S_...] Your authentic self is still there. It’s just lying dormant as repairs and healing occur. I see it as like being in a medically induced coma so your body/brain can heal.

I don’t believe you’re the same person coming out of this as you were going in. How could you be? Perhaps you appreciate life more, see beauty around you a little differently; don’t let small things bother you and anxiety is history. I don’t think much will bother you again.

Many speak of this as a metamorphosis, transformative. Some even go as far as to say they are glad they experienced it.

Just rest assured that you will not only be okay but you’ll soar once in the other side.

[[S_...]]

@[Ma...] how long did it take to feel like yourself again ? I feel soo lost :( 

[[En...]]

28 minutes ago, [[M...] said:

@[S_...] Your authentic self is still there. It’s just lying dormant as repairs and healing occur. I see it as like being in a medically induced coma so your body/brain can heal.

I don’t believe you’re the same person coming out of this as you were going in. How could you be? Perhaps you appreciate life more, see beauty around you a little differently; don’t let small things bother you and anxiety is history. I don’t think much will bother you again.

Many speak of this as a metamorphosis, transformative. Some even go as far as to say they are glad they experienced it.

Just rest assured that you will not only be okay but you’ll soar once in the other side.

I for one look at this experience as something that will change me forever. I will never take my good health for granted ever again. As hard as this is to go through it will eventually make me stronger. I will appreciate life. Is going through this fun? No. But when I have windows I find myself more humble and grateful. I have also become more spiritual. I have learned how to deal with anxiety. I have a panicky personality and I dwell on anxiety and depression.  When I feel like I am anxious I tend to panic. I have learned how to deal with this. I get waves of anxiety in the mornings which I just tell myself just to get through the morning it will be better later today. 

[[En...]]

3 minutes ago, [[S...] said:

@[Ma...] how long did it take to feel like yourself again ? I feel soo lost

You will be yourself again. This is not forever. You have to tell yourself that so you dont have panic attacks. Read Chapter 3 of the Ashton Manual. 

https://www.benzoinfo.com/ashtonmanual/chapter3/#sensory-and-motor-disturbances

I have this page bookmarked. When I feel hopeless I read it.