Has this been anhedonia?

[[Bi...]]

I have realised - after reading posts about it for the last few years and finally understanding what it is - that maybe I have been going through anhedonia, just didn't know the term for it.

Particularly at the beginning, I didn't have any positive emotions at all and I completely lost all  feelings of love and things. Which in itself was heartbreaking - I know I love my partner and others in my life, I want to feel it again! I am 28months in, I'm fed up of it!

Then since January this year during a few windows I've had the low feelings lift and a few days feeling absolutely amazing and having all the positive emotions flooding back, rather than just chuckling along and trying to be positive outwardly around others like I am doing any other time. 

But still never felt all my emotions at once - always missing a few and feeling flat in other ways, such dark thoughts coming back in a lot and only felt love twice since the start in moments that really hit home with my partner. 

Is this anhedonia despite a few moments during windows?

[[jo...]]

Yeah thats it. I just describe it as depression. Seems like the same thing pretty much.

[[Go...]]

Anhedonia is basically losing the ability to enjoy the things that you once did. A lot of time it exhibits itself in our hobbies/interests or even food. Our favorite activity is no longer fun, our favorite foods don’t taste the same. Basically nothing brings pleasure. I can imagine that this could also express itself in relationships and our emotional responses to other people. I have experienced this often throughout my life and for me, in those times, I just don’t want to do anything or go anywhere because nothing brings any enjoyment, so what’s the point? I do not experience that as a withdrawal side effect, though. 

[[Kr...]]

On 09/07/2024 at 03:08, [[B...] said:

I have realised - after reading posts about it for the last few years and finally understanding what it is - that maybe I have been going through anhedonia, just didn't know the term for it.

Particularly at the beginning, I didn't have any positive emotions at all and I completely lost all  feelings of love and things. Which in itself was heartbreaking - I know I love my partner and others in my life, I want to feel it again! I am 28months in, I'm fed up of it!

Then since January this year during a few windows I've had the low feelings lift and a few days feeling absolutely amazing and having all the positive emotions flooding back, rather than just chuckling along and trying to be positive outwardly around others like I am doing any other time. 

But still never felt all my emotions at once - always missing a few and feeling flat in other ways, such dark thoughts coming back in a lot and only felt love twice since the start in moments that really hit home with my partner. 

Is this anhedonia despite a few moments during windows?

Yes. 
It affects sex life too as you probably know.