Desperately need hope and advice!

[[I ...]]

I was on Ativan from 1.5mg to 2.5 for 12 years. I'm off from December 2021. I got very severe acute that lasted for a few months, after gradually improving with amazing windows but waves also.

A last wave last August because of stress, it lasted for one month abd from then i thought i was healed. I had amazing 8 months without symptoms, since this May after changing my job, I'm very lonely in my new job, I'm completely alone in my office and I started to take stJohn's wort in the night to improve my mood and actually I entered in a kind of wave in my 30 th month being off.

I must to say that is not that severe like those ones in the beginning, but I feel that I lost myself and im struggling again with a lot of bad intrusive thoughts and memories.

It's possible still our brains to be that much fragile and to react like this after change and stress even so long after our last dose

I'm one step to be "therapitased" again to psychiatrist after so hard battle, and is not fair.

Somebody with similar experience in very late phase and struggling occasionally?

Jesus I'm close to my 3 year being off , I don't want to pass through a hell again.

Please give me support and similar experiences to continue.

Love you all.

Greetings from Greece.

[[Lo...]]

The same thing happened to me , I really have no idea what’s going on 

[[I ...]]

1 hour ago, [[L...] said:

The same thing happened to me , I really have no idea what’s going on 

I'm the same..and I feel so desperate and embarrassed because I'm in my 30 month off. One week nearly I have non stop intrusive thoughts. Before this for 8 months I was perfect.

For how long period you're off ? Or you are still tapering?

Did you had some stressful event?

I had it and I'm sure that I got setback from that.

But I can't believe how I can be so fragile after two and half years off...

It's unfair!