are you sure that we really get healed?

[[be...]]

im kind of tired of hearing "we will get healed" and "the symptoms will go away"

 

insomnia is tortouring me. i could sleep for 3 hours a day until last week. it is now maximum 1 hour. 

i have numbness all over my body. my entire body feels like rubber.

 

memory impairment.

 

brain zaps. brain tremor, electricity in the brain or brain spasm. i don't even know what they really are but they are there and it twitches by it self.

 

no focus, no concentration. 

 

neuropathy

 

sexually defunt- no erection

 

white urine

 

heart rate skyrockets, 

 

dry eyes - no tear

 

anxiety, confusion... 

 

hypersensitivity to light, sound....

 

eletrical sensation in the head when i look at the computer, tv or phone. can't use e-gadget for so long since my brain will be fried.

 

allll these worst symptoms... what's going on? and how could it happen for using xanax for 1 month... and will they really get fixed once gaba and gaba receptors return? i wonder if the CNS and the circuit in the brain are premanantly damaged or they are re-arranged and can't not return to the original way. 

 

And we Benzo buddies know that it is real and the doctors say that they are not and say that we are just crazy whever I go to hospitals.

 

 

i'm sorry that i keep talking about it everyday... i'm sorry about whining. but i just have to.... because i'm not sure if it is even sirvivable...

 

What is going on me?

 

it is just crazy.

 

 

Edited June 25 by [be...]

[[So...]]

We heal, 100% it just takes awhile.  I'm sorry you are suffering so badly from one month of use, but it is not unheard of and you are not alone.  One day this will all be a distant memory, you just have to survive ❤️ chin up

[[PE...]]

How long have you been out @[be...]?

I'm at 8 month and getting better for each month. Insomnia is a problem. I have problem falling asleep not staying asleep when i finally fall asleep. 

I'm like 80% back to normal. I ask myself the same question sometimes but if i get a normal sleep pattern back I say it's good enough to have something I can call a life.

Your thoughts is totally normal though! 

If i had to bet money on if you would get better or not I would put it on you getting better. I base that on if I could get better anyone can. 

👽

Edited June 25 by [PE...]

[[...]]

I don't know how to set your mind at ease other than tell you what mostly worked for me, and I'm just a carer in this situation. But my son has been in such a bad shape (couldn't move, talk, eat, sleep at one moment) that it was easy to think he wouldn't survive this ordeal. Now, at 18 months out his body works fine again, miraculously and he even sleeps well and lots (though he's not through with the emotional part and some lingering and weird physical symptoms).

Anyway, the thing I always think when the waves get bad is that this thing is trying to spook me, to push us back into the benzo. I imagine this drug sticking its claws into its víctims so they can never be free of it. So then you have this succession of unimaginable surreal symptoms to worry and frighten you, and doubts (because Drs don't acknowledge it, because it doesn't make sense, etc), and fear. And anger. But it really is all a fight of wills, in who can wait the other out. Each wave is like Ooh this bs is stubborn but I'm more stubborn and I won't let it win. I won't let it frighten me. I'll wait it out. You will heal, I'm sure of it.

[[De...]]

@[...]you are such a big inspiration to me! You must be great mom!! Your sun is surely very happy to have you for support! I can imagine how hard it was to see him suffering so much! And you tried so hard to really understand this problem And to fight with him! ❤️

@[be...] it is very hard to think pozitive when you are not feeling good. Remember this is one of the simptom! Doom🤬 when things get better that simptom will go to your past! And we all heal! I see so much improvements in my life since begining of this journey till now. Some days are still hard but I try to focus on good things. I had most of your simptoms And some you didnt mention. Some night s I couldnt sleep at all. I was pacing trough the house, call friends to sleep in my house because of need to go out for a walk during sleepless night, needed to have someone next to me just to feel litle bit more safer And someone to talk to. But in same time its was dificult to spend time with other people. Its torturing! But worst simptoms did went away! And i am better. And i am sure you will get better too!!! 🍀

[[Ca...]]

4 hours ago, [[P...] said:

How long have you been out @[be...]?

I'm at 8 month and . . . I base that on if I could get better anyone can. 

👽

Doesn't work like that though - I'm at 8 years and still going through a nightmare, but that's just my case. Everyone is different, independent of yours or anyone else's case. I can only hope others don't go down the same road as me. Glad to see it's getting better for you. It's reasonable to expect @benzoisbad to be a similar case. There's always hope -  

🕷️

 

 

[[bw...]]

5 hours ago, [[P...] said:

How long have you been out @[be...]?

I'm at 8 month and getting better for each month. Insomnia is a problem. I have problem falling asleep not staying asleep when i finally fall asleep. 

I'm like 80% back to normal. I ask myself the same question sometimes but if i get a normal sleep pattern back I say it's good enough to have something I can call a life.

Your thoughts is totally normal though! 

If i had to bet money on if you would get better or not I would put it on you getting better. I base that on if I could get better anyone can. 

👽

Not for everyone. Im approaching 7years and fully disabled. Living on my lounge. Life shattering.

[[PE...]]

1 minute ago, [[b...] said:

Not for everyone. Im approaching 7years and fully disabled. Living on my lounge. Life shattering.

Sorry to hear that. Yes that cruel fact is coming more and more clear to me..

It would be interesting to see the actual % on how many it is that are damaged for life. 

Are you taking any medication for masking the symptoms you got?

If I had symptoms after 7 years i would take just about anything just to get a somewhat better life. 

 

 

[[Ma...]]

@[be...] You have to believe in YOUR healing. This is your journey that is only yours to take.

Do not believe anything other than your ability to heal 100%.

I believe you have to be a co-creator in that healing by eating a clean diet, exercising to your abilities and build on that when you can; research neuroplasicity and implement some of those practices (consistency, repetition), stay away from alcohol at all costs; develop a tool box to manage your symptoms such as meditation, box breathing-you’ll find what works for you.

And let time pass with grace. In order to get through this you have to go ALL the way through.