Speech(Broken conversations), and writing

[[pi...]]

3 minutes ago, [[L...] said:

hi pianogirl. i used to play a lot and kind of gave it up at one point when my hippy teacher kept trying to get me into blues which was boring and repetitive to me and I was bring out chopin books. I am going to use getting back into playing to try to restore myself a bit through challenging my mind. Hows your ability now?  It is very hard for me but it has also been almost 2 decades.   

It’s never too late to learn or relearn. My oldest student is 77. I think I am playing very well these days and enjoying teaching, so as a 73 year old, retirement isn’t on my radar. 

[[Le...]]

3 minutes ago, [[p...] said:

It’s never too late to learn or relearn. My oldest student is 77. I think I am playing very well these days and enjoying teaching, so as a 73 year old, retirement isn’t on my radar. 

i have an old high maintenance piano but am going to pick up a nice roland elec. Really looking forward to it. My whole life I replay Rubenstein playing the Heroic Polonaise in my head when I have a quiet moment. makes my fingers repeat bits of it.  I picked at it myself before quitting. It is my goal. 

Edited June 4 by [Le...]

[[pi...]]

1 minute ago, [[L...] said:

i have an old high maintenance piano but am going to pick up a nice roland elec. Really looking forward to it. My whole life I replay Rubenstein playing the Heroic Polonaise in my head when I have a quiet moment. makes my fingers repeat bits of it.  I picked at it myself before quitting. It is my goal. 

It’s great to have goals. I have several pieces on my to do list as well. Roland makes a good digital piano, the sound is pretty realistic. We’ve had Yamahas for digital but they haven’t kept up technologically in terms of realistic sound production . My acoustic piano is a digital and I love it.

[[Ca...]]

21 hours ago, [[L...] said:

@[Ca...] I just noticed that a lot of physical symptoms stopped at 30 days off.  The sweating and body odour, heart palpitations also stopped, metalic mouth taste stopped.  It's a very STRANGE process though. Once the drug itself has left your body, another process starts.  Benzo's adapt many parts of our CNS (only in dependency), especially GABA receptors etc etc.  This process takes an average of 6 to 18 months AFTER you stop the drug, to reverse those adaptations back to their pre benzo state, which is called CNS Homeostatis ❤️

@[Li...] I actually never knew about this. So after you stop taking your last benzo(is this including sleeping tablets or just X and others in that gene pool? My physical symptoms are mainly sweating, speech, concentration, speech, waves of hotflushes(not too bad lately). I can still run, my sports watch says I'm very healthy off it and my rate and a blood pressure are down which is great. Still I'm only on 2 days CT. And not really eating but it's improving and not really going to the toilet. Slight muscle jerks, maybe 90% decrease from a week ago doing my fast taper.

Mentally, I suffer from over thinking, anxiety, social anxiety, speech, remembering things when I was drinking and on X. It'd so shit, my friends bands are coming up and I don't think I'm going to be able to go to them like this 

Lisa when you say there was a next phase, I didn't know about this. What are the symptoms like in that phase? im assuming that happened after two weeks of CT as that's how long it usually stays in your body? During those 6 - 18 months what are the symptoms you faced??

[[Ca...]]

13 hours ago, [[o...] said:

I hold onto the article by Parker on "What is Happening to Your Brain".  I need to be reminded by a peer like you, or sometimes I'll just go and re-read her article.  I'll paste it below, but basically, my brain is healing itself as the benzo leaves my body, and so are some of my physical issues. I guess that all goes together, works together.

I realize there has to be a detox period so to speak, so even a little skin issue I think of as my body discarding garbage (the benzo).  I believe that's true, and I do my best to eat healthy and get exercise every day.  Fueling my body to support it's healing

I'll put @[pa...] article here for you in case you haven't seen it yet oregonlady

What is happening in your brain

Thank you Oregonlady this is so helpful

So younwould be in thebsame boat with this? Basically 2 weeks after you stop and get rid of benzo out of your body you notice the physical symptoms left you aswell? We're the next symptoms to stop mentally? 

And thank you so much for the artlical! I've finally dont feel too much brain fog, which is great but there's alot still to subside.

[[Li...]]

55 minutes ago, [[C...] said:

@[Li...] I actually never knew about this. So after you stop taking your last benzo(is this including sleeping tablets or just X and others in that gene pool? My physical symptoms are mainly sweating, speech, concentration, speech, waves of hotflushes(not too bad lately). I can still run, my sports watch says I'm very healthy off it and my rate and a blood pressure are down which is great. Still I'm only on 2 days CT. And not really eating but it's improving and not really going to the toilet. Slight muscle jerks, maybe 90% decrease from a week ago doing my fast taper.

Mentally, I suffer from over thinking, anxiety, social anxiety, speech, remembering things when I was drinking and on X. It'd so shit, my friends bands are coming up and I don't think I'm going to be able to go to them like this 

Lisa when you say there was a next phase, I didn't know about this. What are the symptoms like in that phase? im assuming that happened after two weeks of CT as that's how long it usually stays in your body? During those 6 - 18 months what are the symptoms you faced??

@[Ca...] this is what they have called BIND..benzodiazepine Induced Neurological Dysfunction.   Not everyone goes through this, it's about 20% of people who come off benzo's.   If you go to youtube there are heaps of good video's there !! I'm coming out of it now.  For me it was intense chemical heavy type anxiety, internal tremors/vibrations, balance issues etc etc but everyone is so different !! Some people call it PAWS...protracted acute withdrawal syndrome  !! You're doing really well ❤️

[[or...]]

7 hours ago, [[C...] said:

Thank you Oregonlady this is so helpful

So younwould be in thebsame boat with this? Basically 2 weeks after you stop and get rid of benzo out of your body you notice the physical symptoms left you aswell? We're the next symptoms to stop mentally? 

And thank you so much for the artlical! I've finally dont feel too much brain fog, which is great but there's alot still to subside.

I'm not finished with my taper @[Ca...] just to be sure you understood that   I have started healing, but not sure some things haven't gotten a little worse.  I did have the brain-fog at least start to lift, at times. 

Now, with my last 3% taper, I seem  to have it worse.  It does seem like I've seen most of the improvement mentally, but I think mostly, everything wrong with me has been windows and waves, back and forth, not like a permanent, actual healed, or cured.

I wish I had better things to share here, I just keep tapering, and have a lot of hope of some permanent healing where sxs won't come back on me, Oregonlady PS I want healing so much but I see that I need to just use the word "improvement" because I don't want to mislead anyone about my own tapering-journey.