I AM NEW AND IN TOLERANCE FOR YEARS

[[th...]]

2 minutes ago, [[P...] said:

Oh sorry about that.. he ruined your ct! 

Ok but then you know you can do it.. should give some comfort. I surely wouldn't be able to work back when i was in acute. 

Mabey a faster taper? Better then no taper at all.

What I’m wondering is what the hell is the time line for acute because 3 weeks and I was very bad lol 

[[PE...]]

3 minutes ago, [[t...] said:

What I’m wondering is what the hell is the time line for acute because 3 weeks and I was very bad lol 

Yeah I get that. From the nightmare accute it slides to the awful post acute witch slowly gets better lol.

For me it was like 2-3 weeks. But as you have already mentioned, are you one of those having a short accute, or a longer.. 

I belive the fear for doing this is actually worse than doing it. And being in wd symptoms on them, what are the choices?

I think you be fine. Get into fight mode 😊😊

[[th...]]

4 minutes ago, [[P...] said:

Yeah I get that. From the nightmare accute it slides to the awful post acute witch slowly gets better lol.

For me it was like 2-3 weeks. But as you have already mentioned, are you one of those having a short accute, or a longer.. 

I belive the fear for doing this is actually worse than doing it. And being in wd symptoms on them, what are the choices?

I think you be fine. Get into fight mode 😊😊

Did you have pain?? Did you also not sleep? Did you also feel fear? Like people dying, being alone.. I see the people on here five years in and say bed ridden… 

[[Be...]]

1 hour ago, [[P...] said:

Yes it does. I even started to feel good and relaxed from time to time. Totally worth quitting that benzo bullshit!

This is what I'm holding onto right now...the hope of being able to experience "relaxed" again someday. Thank you for the hope! :-) 

 

[[PE...]]

4 minutes ago, [[t...] said:

Did you have pain?? Did you also not sleep? Did you also feel fear? Like people dying, being alone.. I see the people on here five years in and say bed ridden… 

No psychical pain! Mental pain yes. Insomnia and fear for everything. Basically unable to have any form if positive thought or feeling.

I was up walking and didn't spend more than a couple of hours in bed, so not bed bound. More bound to walk lol.

Anakthasia was my main problem. My legs hurted so I limped bad but had to keep walking.

[[th...]]

9 minutes ago, [[P...] said:

No psychical pain! Mental pain yes. Insomnia and fear for everything. Basically unable to have any form if positive thought or feeling.

I was up walking and didn't spend more than a couple of hours in bed, so not bed bound. More bound to walk lol.

Anakthasia was my main problem. My legs hurted so I limped bad but had to keep walking.

My stomach muscles clinched in ward and left lines. Then it became severe pelvic pain. 

[[th...]]

10 minutes ago, [[B...] said:

This is what I'm holding onto right now...the hope of being able to experience "relaxed" again someday. Thank you for the hope! :-) 

How long since your jump? 

[[PE...]]

4 minutes ago, [[t...] said:

My stomach muscles clinched in ward and left lines. Then it became severe pelvic pain. 

Oh ok.. sorry about that.

[[Bu...]]

Hey again @[th...], Hey @[PE...]

I'm glad @[PE...] that you jumped in here with your experience and support.  I'm always impressed with how you've  handled an incredibly hard time and I like reading your posts.   I'm so happy that you are doing so much better!  

@[th...], if you just reinstated 3 weeks ago, your system might just need some time to calm down before making any other changes.  And unfortunately, for some of us, myself included, pain seems to be a part of this process.  But it was definitely more manageable sometimes and I didn't make any changes until it was livable.  

As for an "acute" phase, are talking about during a taper or after you are off the drug?

And as for the lack of new Success Stories, I don't think this means that people aren't getting better.  I think it just means that they aren't writing about it right now.  I have been on this site long enough to see almost everything waxes and wanes:  the popularity of different topics, mind-sets, questions, etc., I think this is just one more case of that.

  

[[th...]]

50 minutes ago, [[B...] said:

Hey again @[th...], Hey @[PE...]

I'm glad @[PE...] that you jumped in here with your experience and support.  I'm always impressed with how you've  handled an incredibly hard time and I like reading your posts.   I'm so happy that you are doing so much better!  

@[th...], if you just reinstated 3 weeks ago, your system might just need some time to calm down before making any other changes.  And unfortunately, for some of us, myself included, pain seems to be a part of this process.  But it was definitely more manageable sometimes and I didn't make any changes until it was livable.  

As for an "acute" phase, are talking about during a taper or after you are off the drug?

And as for the lack of new Success Stories, I don't think this means that people aren't getting better.  I think it just means that they aren't writing about it right now.  I have been on this site long enough to see almost everything waxes and wanes:  the popularity of different topics, mind-sets, questions, etc., I think this is just one more case of that.

  

Ok. This is clearing some things up now. What do I do from here? Stay on for 6 weeks or more or maybe im feeling this way because I’m still not “stable” ish? 
 

this is all new to me and the next damn time guys… it’s gonna be my success story and damn will I have a good one… 

[[Bu...]]

@[th...],

First, I love your attitude! 😃  I have no doubt that you're going to have an incredible story! 

It often takes at least a month or more for things to settle down, and you, my friend, have been through the wringer.  If it were me, I would just sit tight for a while and see how you feel in the next couple of weeks.  You can reevaluate as you go. 

There is no set in stone time line here.  Generally, we suggest a slow 5-10% taper that is lead by your symptoms, but generally not cutting anymore often than 2-3 weeks.  But that is after you feel stable.  Stable doesn't mean you'll necessarily feel good, it just means you feel like it's manageable.  I rarely felt good during my taper, but I could function.

Oh, and so you know, I've been off for 7 1/2 months, and while I'm not healed completely yet, I'm well on my way.  

I have to step off here for a bit now, but I'll check back later.

[[th...]]

Ohhhhhh this is hella personal now. You got me twice Xanax but the third time, dude you and I are in for one hell of a ride and the next time I will know what I know now from this site…

I thank you so much for the tips and help. But you know crappy it feels that when I take that .5 for maybe 20 minutes of ok to flat out heart racing and anxiety. It sucks, but it’s ok. It’s perfectly fine because here soon… it is my time to shine and though I’ll look bad doing it, I will do it. 
 

people commenting helps me feel better about this very isolating issue. @[Bu...] I’m tiny, but I’ll fight a table saw if you let me. 

[[Br...]]

18 minutes ago, [[t...] said:

Ohhhhhh this is hella personal now. You got me twice Xanax but the third time, dude you and I are in for one hell of a ride and the next time I will know what I know now from this site…

Love this, @[th...]!  I really believe your grit will carry you this.  Many of us dig deep during benzo withdrawal and are surprised to find strength we didn't know we had.

Like just about everybody here I know what it's like to be gripped by the fear of everything going wrong.  It's benzo withdrawal's trademark and greatest talent.  The fear center of the brain is scrambling to find equilibrium as it heals and it blasts out fear messages and red alerts 24/7.  It's not reality based but it's hard to think straight when you're in the middle of it.

Please don't be discouraged there aren't a lot of new Success Stories.  There are many reasons why this might be but it doesn't mean people aren't healing.  Sometimes it's as simple as people not wanting to come back here when they've recovered.  They may not feel ready to revisit that hellish period in their lives - too busy enjoying simple pleasures again.

It seems to me it makes the most sense for you to stay with your current dosage and dosing schedule for a few weeks and see how it goes before making any changes.  

We're here for you to bounce ideas off and reach out for support.

[[th...]]

@[Br...] Ok well had you said that to me 3 weeks ago, I would have laughed and cried at the same time because damn did I wail. I cried hours. Id cry over anything. During that time of withdrawal is when I actually looked into it for the first time and found " Years" "bed ridden" "lost my job and my wife" DURINGGGGGG the wd. THEEEEEEEEN went and found " I am 20 years out and I still am bad."

So.. Can you imagine the benzo terror PLUS reading about what it is, what it does, how long. horror stories. OH MY GOD!!! I rushed to the Urgent Care, I asked for gabapentin because a post somewhere had it and I tried 1 100mg and might as well have sucked dust off of my fireplace mantle. Nothing. So I never took another.

I even tell ya something else... there was this TikTok trend where teens was taking like massive amounts of Benadryl to see " The Hat Man."  One night I took like 10 because it was day 8 of no sleep and not really eating and I kid you not

Even the Hat Man said " Hell nah not even I am going near your insane ass right now."  Didnt visit me that night and I slept 45 minutes.  Sad.. I wont get to add Hat Man to my success story.. 

I did buy a new car during WD. Needed one but didnt need the one that I have. It was an impulse buy or something. Kinda dont remember buying it. Its a Subaru. I point to the star emblem and tell everyone its my astrological sign now. I am a Subrutarius. Thinking about making it my whole personality now and only go to cold brew shops and listen to indie music that is so underground...it is played by 2 Siberian bears and a small Himalayan child.

Once again guys. You brought a smile to my face. And it is insane how someone just telling me things makes me feel like amazing. 

[[Bu...]]

@[th...],

You crack me up!  I'm so glad we're helping you.  I think a lot of us have no idea what's happened to us until we find this site.  The sheer relief of knowing I wasn't alone and I wasn't nuts was just amazing.

[[Ch...]]

2 hours ago, [[t...] said:

Once again guys. You brought a smile to my face. And it is insane how someone just telling me things makes me feel like amazing. 

I hope it brings a smile to your face to learn that I was on 3mg Xanax for a few decades, then switched to the longer lasting equi-potency of 60mg Valium to taper for 18 months. I made it, and you will too.

Who prescribes for you? Are you familiar with the Ashton Manual? I used the Ashton protocol to taper. It certainly wasn't easy, but I got better as I got lower...

If you're in tolerance, the only thing to do is get off. In the meantime, have you considered changing your dosing from 0.5, 0.5 +1.0 to .5mg/4 times daily? It seems that perhaps the "big shot" of 1mg in the evening is setting you up for problems the next day when you go back to just .5mg. Try to keep those levels as even as possible while you're trying to stabilize.

Edited April 12 by [Ch...]

[[th...]]

7 hours ago, [[C...] said:

I hope it brings a smile to your face to learn that I was on 3mg Xanax for a few decades, then switched to the longer lasting equi-potency of 60mg Valium to taper for 18 months. I made it, and you will too.

Who prescribes for you? Are you familiar with the Ashton Manual? I used the Ashton protocol to taper. It certainly wasn't easy, but I got better as I got lower...

If you're in tolerance, the only thing to do is get off. In the meantime, have you considered changing your dosing from 0.5, 0.5 +1.0 to .5mg/4 times daily? It seems that perhaps the "big shot" of 1mg in the evening is setting you up for problems the next day when you go back to just .5mg. Try to keep those levels as even as possible while you're trying to stabilize.

I was wondering about that but I normally take .5 at 7 or 8 am and then .5 at 2 and then 1mg at 8pm. I have terrible inter dose withdrawals. What should I do? 

[[Ch...]]

3 hours ago, [[t...] said:

I normally take .5 at 7 or 8 am and then .5 at 2 and then 1mg at 8pm. I have terrible inter dose withdrawals. What should I do? 

Like I said, you might try dosing 4 times a day - every 6 hours - at .5mg to see if you can stabilize.

 

11 hours ago, [[C...] said:

Try to keep those levels as even as possible while you're trying to stabilize.

 

[[th...]]

2 hours ago, [[C...] said:

Like I said, you might try dosing 4 times a day - every 6 hours - at .5mg to see if you can stabilize.

So wake up at 1 am and take the other .5? 
 

How did you fare with the switch and then getting off if you don’t mind me asking. How did you do and how are you now? 

[[Ch...]]

59 minutes ago, [[t...] said:

So wake up at 1 am and take the other .5? 
 

How did you fare with the switch and then getting off if you don’t mind me asking. How did you do and how are you now? 

Well, if you're trying to stabilize, then yes, you might try waking up to take a 4th dose. It may or may not help. It's probably worth a shot to try to evenly space out your current full daily dose (2mg). As it is now, you're taking a bit (.5mg), another bit (.5mg), and then a burst (1mg).

I switched to Valium (diazepam) in steps over the course of several weeks, as per Ashton. It took me 18 months to taper 60mg. Unlike many, I did not let my symptoms dictate the pace of my taper. I never up-dosed, never held. I kept going. During the last 10mgs or so, I slowed to dropping .5mg every 14th day instead of 1mg.

I've been off 22.5 months. Things have steadily gotten better.
 

[[PE...]]

18 hours ago, [[t...] said:

@[Br...] Ok well had you said that to me 3 weeks ago, I would have laughed and cried at the same time because damn did I wail. I cried hours. Id cry over anything. During that time of withdrawal is when I actually looked into it for the first time and found " Years" "bed ridden" "lost my job and my wife" DURINGGGGGG the wd. THEEEEEEEEN went and found " I am 20 years out and I still am bad."

So.. Can you imagine the benzo terror PLUS reading about what it is, what it does, how long. horror stories. OH MY GOD!!! I rushed to the Urgent Care, I asked for gabapentin because a post somewhere had it and I tried 1 100mg and might as well have sucked dust off of my fireplace mantle. Nothing. So I never took another.

I even tell ya something else... there was this TikTok trend where teens was taking like massive amounts of Benadryl to see " The Hat Man."  One night I took like 10 because it was day 8 of no sleep and not really eating and I kid you not

Even the Hat Man said " Hell nah not even I am going near your insane ass right now."  Didnt visit me that night and I slept 45 minutes.  Sad.. I wont get to add Hat Man to my success story.. 

I did buy a new car during WD. Needed one but didnt need the one that I have. It was an impulse buy or something. Kinda dont remember buying it. Its a Subaru. I point to the star emblem and tell everyone its my astrological sign now. I am a Subrutarius. Thinking about making it my whole personality now and only go to cold brew shops and listen to indie music that is so underground...it is played by 2 Siberian bears and a small Himalayan child.

Once again guys. You brought a smile to my face. And it is insane how someone just telling me things makes me feel like amazing. 

Lol you're so funny!! I keep going back to your posts just to laugh 😁😅

[[th...]]

46 minutes ago, [[C...] said:

Well, if you're trying to stabilize, then yes, you might try waking up to take a 4th dose. It may or may not help. It's probably worth a shot to try to evenly space out your current full daily dose (2mg). As it is now, you're taking a bit (.5mg), another bit (.5mg), and then a burst (1mg).

I switched to Valium (diazepam) in steps over the course of several weeks, as per Ashton. It took me 18 months to taper 60mg. Unlike many, I did not let my symptoms dictate the pace of my taper. I never up-dosed, never held. I kept going. During the last 10mgs or so, I slowed to dropping .5mg every 14th day instead of 1mg.

I've been off 22.5 months. Things have steadily gotten better.
 

So two years and you are starting to feel better? 

[[Ch...]]

3 minutes ago, [[t...] said:

So two years and you are starting to feel better? 

I've been "starting to feel better" since I started tapering. It's just gotten better and better with time. It takes time.

[[th...]]

@[Ch...] ok I’m getting it. My taper wasn’t bad. I wasn’t depressed because let’s be honest, I didn’t know shit lol so I’m like taper taper taper, I’ll feel bad for a few months and then taaa daaa!!!!!

 

nah, what it really was like was 3 days post jump not too terrible and then it went down hill very very quick but I had extreme genital pain with stomach tension sucking in my stomach to the point I had lines from when I would sit and I never had that. I also went very off kilter and was manic but so full of fear my eyes stayed wide open, while driving SUPER WIDE. Then more genital pain. I sit and walk at my job and the pain was like being impaled by a sword that had been forged in fire and was stabbing me. 
cheers to what awaits me again… 

[[th...]]

42 minutes ago, [[P...] said:

Lol you're so funny!! I keep going back to your posts just to laugh 😁😅

I mean, here in West Virginia we have to have humor. Life is hard here lol. We live in the mountains. 
 

I do love humor though