I jumped! I did it, still feel like I took a dose, strange!

[[ns...]]

Well I did it, I jumped!

Missed my 5am and 11am doses so I'm on my way. 

It's odd, I feel the same as I do when I take it. Still all the symptoms that come with every dose.

I guess I should have done this a long time ago. 

I'm sure I'll need support, prayer good vibes, happy thoughts lol, but seriously  please send the love my way!

I've read success stories here on BB.

They are so inspiring!

It's easy to see the suffering in the stories I've read, some were painful to read but ended in uplifting promises of hope!

I'll probably spend more time there. If you need a lift, you should check them out! They are so incredible and somehow, i draw strength there.

Someone should really write a book, or a movie about some of those incredible stories of strength and resolve! I think the world could benefit from them.

In the world of benzo withdrawal and the pure hell we go through, some of us aren't so strong, so please be gentle. I'm not as strong as I sometimes appear to be, Mind over matter, fake it til u make it is still my motto, and my faith of course, but all kidding aside, I'm not giving in!!!

I think we all understand that its easy to get caught up in our own time of celebration at times, and we can forget about what it feels like to be needy and broken. 

I hope as does everyone here im sure, that we can escape the pain of a long haul withdrawal syndrome, and am truly sorry for those who are going thru that. im sure its as though it will never end for you and My prayers are with you!

I'll be here off and on on BB,  checking my emails, sitting on my numb butt, lol, and passing the time. But really, I'm so grateful for BB, you are truly a God send to those of us in need of understanding of this syndrome and in need of love and support, thank you 😊 

I will get thru this, I will never give in or give up and I hope and pray you won't either!

Thanks for your encouragement and support in advance

Ns

 

 

 

 

[[Hu...]]

from 0.8mg Diazepam? 

[[ns...]]

Just now, [[H...] said:

from 0.8mg Diazepam? 

Lorazapam. 

I'm hoping I've  got the correct mg right when I say .08mg

I was at 0.020 4x per Day. 

A very tiny little piece of the pill, so small I could no.longer hold it between my fingers to shave. 

 

[[ns...]]

Just now, [[n...] said:

Lorazapam. 

I'm hoping I've  got the correct mg right when I say .08mg

I was at 0.020 4x per Day. 

A very tiny little piece of the pill, so small I could no.longer hold it between my fingers to shave. 

And my fingers are tiny too lol

[[Hu...]]

I hope you're right with the 0.02mg lorazepam. That is indeed not a lot.

0.2 however...is too much to jump from.

 

[[ns...]]

Just now, [[H...] said:

I hope you're right with the 0.02mg lorazepam. That is indeed not a lot.

0.2 however...is too much to jump from.

Yes, I know it's very small dose. I should have done this a long time ago, I was just to afraid too. 

It was a very small dose. I promise it wasn't too much. Every dose I cringed before i took it because it gave me such horrid symptoms. Been that way since I had to taper. That's why I couldn't do anymore. I just read from jelly baby on another post about our memory of each cut, I guess that's what I'm feeling.

It's the same as if I just took it!

Anyway thanks for your input 

Ns

[[je...]]

Congratulations on being benzo free!

[[Co...]]

I’m sending prayers your way !!!! You are on your way now , wishing you all the best and you’ve got this !!!!!

[[re...]]

YES!!!!! WHOOHOOO!!!!!!!!!  

That is soooooo good that you got the courage and jumped. I think at that super low dose and the paradoxical effect it was giving you that you should be well on your way to healing in the days and months ahead. One good thing about the Ativan is you won't have to wait long to see what happens. With Diazepam the delayed withdrawal is kinda crappy really when you think about it. 

[[ns...]]

10 minutes ago, [[j...] said:

Congratulations on being benzo free!

Thank u jelly baby!

You've been such an inspiration to me and I'm grateful! It's getting real for sure!

Bless your sweet heart!

Ns

[[ns...]]

9 minutes ago, [[C...] said:

I’m sending prayers your way !!!! You are on your way now , wishing you all the best and you’ve got this !!!!!

Thank u Cookie! It's getting real for sure and setting in. The 1st comment kinda caused me to second guess myself but I'm ok now.

Woosh, that was something!

Anyway, I'm grateful for your prayers and for being such a good friend. 

I hope your doing ok, I know you've been having a rough one. 

I'll be in touch ok

[[ns...]]

7 minutes ago, [[r...] said:

YES!!!!! WHOOHOOO!!!!!!!!!  

That is soooooo good that you got the courage and jumped. I think at that super low dose and the paradoxical effect it was giving you that you should be well on your way to healing in the days and months ahead. One good thing about the Ativan is you won't have to wait long to see what happens. With Diazepam the delayed withdrawal is kinda crappy really when you think about it. 

Lol, oh yeah,  lorazepam is terrible!

Wish Ida known in advance but doesn't matter now.

It's definitely showing itself, has been for a long time. 

So happy to be rid of it!

Thanks for your support, love the happy note!

Let me know when you get there. I'll be here to cheer u on!

Ns 

[[Ma...]]

@[ns...] WTG!!! I’m so happy for you! I bet in, say 14 days? Dancing. You’ll be dancing 💃!!

[[...]]

3 hours ago, [[n...] said:

Well I did it, I jumped!

Missed my 5am and 11am doses so I'm on my way. 

It's odd, I feel the same as I do when I take it. Still all the symptoms that come with every dose.

I guess I should have done this a long time ago. 

I'm sure I'll need support, prayer good vibes, happy thoughts lol, but seriously  please send the love my way!

I've read success stories here on BB.

They are so inspiring!

It's easy to see the suffering in the stories I've read, some were painful to read but ended in uplifting promises of hope!

I'll probably spend more time there. If you need a lift, you should check them out! They are so incredible and somehow, i draw strength there.

Someone should really write a book, or a movie about some of those incredible stories of strength and resolve! I think the world could benefit from them.

In the world of benzo withdrawal and the pure hell we go through, some of us aren't so strong, so please be gentle. I'm not as strong as I sometimes appear to be, Mind over matter, fake it til u make it is still my motto, and my faith of course, but all kidding aside, I'm not giving in!!!

I think we all understand that its easy to get caught up in our own time of celebration at times, and we can forget about what it feels like to be needy and broken. 

I hope as does everyone here im sure, that we can escape the pain of a long haul withdrawal syndrome, and am truly sorry for those who are going thru that. im sure its as though it will never end for you and My prayers are with you!

I'll be here off and on on BB,  checking my emails, sitting on my numb butt, lol, and passing the time. But really, I'm so grateful for BB, you are truly a God send to those of us in need of understanding of this syndrome and in need of love and support, thank you 😊 

I will get thru this, I will never give in or give up and I hope and pray you won't either!

Thanks for your encouragement and support in advance

Ns

Nsindy, my congratulations!) Great stepand it was really brave of you, i think, psychologically.

Send you as much support, admiration and understanding as i can😍🌺🐎!)

[[ns...]]

[[ns...]]

26 minutes ago, [[M...] said:

@[ns...] WTG!!! I’m so happy for you! I bet in, say 14 days? Dancing. You’ll be dancing 💃!!

Lol, thank Mary1, your such a great cheerleader! I need it though. I'm second guessing myself!

Prayers all the way through!

 

[[re...]]

Ativan is NO joke. It is a serious med. It's why ED use it the most for seizures. It is very strong. I believe Ashton mentions it as well as being super nasty on the cns. 

[[ns...]]

Just now, [[r...] said:

Ativan is NO joke. It is a serious med. It's why ED use it the most for seizures. It is very strong. I believe Ashton mentions it as well as being super nasty on the cns. 

Oh yes it's terrible. 

I've had that reaction from the start. It makes me so sick with every dose, but nowi feel eve worse.

Could be stress as I'm pretty nervous about second guessing myself!

I'm not good with math, but I can read my scale and can see the dose is so very tiny.

I'll just have to get thru it

😊 

[[...]]

@[ns...], everything is going to be ok and much better!) Perhaps not at once that great but by and by it will be! Good luck to you with all my heart!

[[ns...]]

[[Hu...]]

19 minutes ago, [[n...] said:

Thank u Kate.

I think I just panicked because of the comment above re my calculations. 

Gotta stick now.

Thanks Kate 

Bless you

Surely you must have it right, since 0.2 is almost a quarter. That is a substantial amount even for such a small pill. You must have been taking powder with 0.02. Maybe it's easier to taper when you live in a country that uses the metric system. 

I've had a pharmacy made 0.05 pills. That is what corresponds with the 0.5mg of diazepam the Ashton methods recommend for jumping. But you took 4x0.02=0.08 lorazepam which is about 0.8mg diazepam. Still quite an amount.

Edited March 18 by [Hu...]

[[ns...]]

3 minutes ago, [[H...] said:

Surely you must have it right, since 0.2 is almost a quarter. That is a substantial amount even for such a small pill. You must have been taking powder with 0.02. Maybe it's easier to taper when you live in a country that uses the metric system. 

Gee thanks for your help 🙄 

[[Hu...]]

4 minutes ago, [[n...] said:

Gee thanks for your help 🙄 

I didn't see your pm. Well, to answer your question. I can understand that lorazepam has those terrible side effects. The chemical anxiety. Maybe you are better without it than tapering even further. Do you have a lot of interdose withdrawal effects? 

Maybe personally, I would've pushed it down a little more for a week or so.

But you made a choice, maybe just stick with it and see what is happening.

Edited March 18 by [Hu...]

[[ns...]]

4 minutes ago, [[H...] said:

I wasn't done typing. I've had my own mathproblems when starting crossing, doubting myself, recalculating. awful. 

Then why did u question mine?

I you've had your own math problems that is?

This is hard enough. 

I asked u fir help you and u came back with a riddle of sorts. 

This isn't a joke, jumping is serious business. If u don't have facts, don't comment please!

[[ns...]]

13 minutes ago, [[H...] said:

Surely you must have it right, since 0.2 is almost a quarter. That is a substantial amount even for such a small pill. You must have been taking powder with 0.02. Maybe it's easier to taper when you live in a country that uses the metric system. 

I've had a pharmacy made 0.05 pills. That is what corresponds with the 0.5mg of diazepam the Ashton methods recommend for jumping. But you took 4x0.02=0.08 lorazepam which is about 0.8mg diazepam. Still quite an amount.

Thanks