Any advice on what I should do or what happened to me ?

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So I’m new but I’ll try to keep my story quick and concise with enough info back I’ve always struggled with ocd anxiety and depression and have been on mends in the past back in 2017 I was eventually on 200 mg of quetipije and 69 of Prozac where I made a full recovery during that time I was taking 3 mg of Ativan daily for about a month was able to quit all medications with no issues Ativan in a month with no symptoms i noticed an Prozac and quetioine 7 months after no issues I ended up smoking cannabis after that till about December I 11 2023 I quit cannabis out of choice and my ocd anxiety depression no sleep came back waited out a month before I decided to go to a psych cuz I though maybe my old symptoms came back and I needed meds to chill for a bit till then so December 20, 2023 I started taking lorazepam on and off in high anxiety moments while I waited  a psych appointment on February 1 where I went and got back on quetipine and porzac off the rip 60 of Prozac and 100 of quetioine where in the 4 day of taking it I would increase to 200. When I did that I had an adverse reaction head burning and developed akathaisa after that we discontinued the quetipine  the day after but  I took Prozac for two more days before before we took me off that aswell. During that time we tried a few other meds in conjunction to the lorazepam to alleviate akathaisa symptoms proponolo and gabapentin. I couldn’t tolerate the gabapentine so stopped it after taking for only three days but continued to take the proponolo and lorazepam .My Akathisia started to improve in record time the doom feeling, s, burning ,  anxiety and pacing was there but not as bad as the beginning eventually leading up to me thinking it was healing for good but I knew I had to get off the lorazepam so I started planning to get off it.  I was taking anywhere from 0.5-1 mg of lorazepam some days 1.5 rarely and about 20-40 mg of proponolo daily. Eventually my akathaisa let up a bit and  I felt good so was taking 0.5 of lorazepam starting February 12 daily for before an appiment I had on the 21st of February .I was doing ok with just that morning dose of 0.5 I still had extreme anxiety at points  that I know think may have been interdose withdrawal but I was managing. February 21st I had an appointment with a doctor that suggested I switch to clonazepam since it was longer acting and I did. Took one dose of 0.25 clonazepam that night and felt ok. Woke up the next day and didn’t dose the normal lorazepam  I took every morning by the night  where I had most my windows were gone so I dosed another .25 of clonazepam  with no relief but went to bed . Woke up the next day and took another .25 of clonazepam instead of of my lorazepam and again no relief and things were getting worse by 5 pm I figured it out that I was possibly having withdrawals from no lorazepam and dosed 0.5 of lorazepam and felt much better not 100 but way better so I figured I pretty much had Cold turkeyd my waited. I stopped dosing the clonazepam and went back to taking lorazepam but the dmg I believe was already  done I had to take 1 mg daily split into two doses instead of my usual 0.5 only with everything flaring back up burning sensations restless akathaisa anxiety off the charts all came back from that one move. I probably should have just kept dosing in pill form and tried to stabilize but I  also figured since I was gonna be tapering lorazepam sometime in the future  I may aswell inform myself in taper methods. I had settled on wanting to do a water taper and figured I could start to practice it now taking my full dose split into water so started to dissolve 1mg of lorazepam in 200 ml of water and splitting the dose three ways to avoid interdose withdrawal as much as possible . I have never taken it like this and I knew that I would be dropping the dose I took in the morning from 0.5 to 0.333 to split the doses evenly but pushed forward since ide still be taking my meds. Since dosing in water form    my anxiety has been weirder not sure if the ct flared my aka or if I’m adjusting to taking it water. Ive recently developed muscle spams and jerks that come and go through the day more when im stressed out or when going to bed that  were not there before the 1-2 day cold turkey. Or even when I got back on lorazepam pill form . Muscle spasm and the jerks on my that wake me up at night  only happed after that short cold turkey and dosing with water even in the beginning of switching to water they were not there but slowly started to develope in these past 5 days. I’m at a loss as to what happened or if my Akathisia is getting worse. I’m still taking my doses in water as of currently and wondering if it was the cold turkey that hurt me and then switching to water shocked me aswell so maybe I just need to stabilize taking it in water for a while or maybe I should go back to the pills feels like it might be to late to go back to pills since that again would be another switch shocking my system further  ? Almost feels like tardive dyskinesia or dystonia my lips almost wanna pucker my feet clench so do my legs or if it’s muscle spasm around those areas and  my mouth that do that and I will admit it happens more when I’m stressed or super anxious. Any insight would be helpful I’m hoping I havent ruined my chances of recovery i should have never attempted to switch benzo I was doing better also two nights ago I worked myself up so much looking up stuff about the muscle jerks spams  the face eyes lips info two nights ago I didn’t sleep kept getting jerks that woke me up and I couldn’t go back to sleep at all that was a day ago but the following day I did no reading still had spams but not the ones that woke me up or in the face just my legs and hands/arms……info on total so far I’ve been on meds is  lorazepam heading to about 3 months of daily use the past 12 days have been taking my lorazepam in a water solution no cuts yet and currently and proponolo  since Feb 8th down 40 mg to 2.5 mg in the morning and 5mg at night tapering this currently not very slowly around 5 days per drop   was told I could stop taking it three days ago by my doc not taking  chances shocking my system anymore. I feel like messed myself up more by all these changes and am scared I won’t come back from this ..