3mg Lorazepam + 5mg Diazepam. Need some Advices!

[[da...]]

I have taken the prescription for 7 years and the dosage went up year by year (20s now). I took it mainly because of dysautonomia and anxiety caused by pressure from my job.

In 2023 August, I quitted my job and tried to fix all the mess. I want to be a physically and mentally fit person without Benzo and I think I can do so.

My doctor claimed that I can slowly cut down the dosage as long as I feel comfortable with that. He said that there is no such things as a "course of tapering". Everything is up to me and I got full control of the tapering. So basically he didn't gave me any useful instruction at all... (And I just know this forum recently!!!)

But I still started my tapering in 2023 August. From 5mg Diazepam+ 1mg Lorazepam (Morning) & 2mg Lorazepam (Night)

In August 2023, I cut the morning 1mg Lorazepam. So that's 5mg Diazepam (Morning) & 2mg Lorazepam (Night) for the day. Dizzying and quite uncomfortable for the first two weeks. I was on a "Fight or Flight" mode in the day. I can concentrated on doing some tasks (I can even teach maths to my younger cousin in a well-organized manner). But I felt burnt out after the tasks, and that's when the dizziness kicks in. Anyway that's still bearable and I went on a vacation to relax myself.

In September 2023, the vacation really helped. I felt much better so I decided to reduce the dose again. So that's a 5mg Diazepam (Morning) + 1.5mg Lorazepam (Night) for the day. Still headache, dizziness and "Fight or Flight" mode. Severe gastralgia kicks in but it only lasted for a week. It just left without a trace... I tried to change my lifestyle (Exercise, reading and many more relaxing stuffs). It did help and I would like to proceed.

In late October 2023, I decided to reduce the dosage more. It was down to 5mg Diazepam (Morning) + 1mg Lorazepam (Night).  Yup. Still headache, dizziness and "Fight or Flight" mode. Got some severe toothache this time and it also only lasted for a week... I initially thought it was a wisdom teeth or so but it's not. I moved to my parents' house in the end of October for a better recovery. Full of love and support. It motivated me to recover and let them proud of me. 

In Early December 2023, everything started to be stable and I felt way better. Both physically and mentally. I was able to read books, cook dinner for my family and learn Spanish causally. I felt like I have made a huge progress and I was very proud of myself. Since I am stable at that time, I decided to reduce the dosage once more.

At Mid December 2023, It was down to 5mg Diazepam (Morning) + 0.5mg Lorazepam (Night). It was still fairly comfortable and sometimes I even forgot to take the Diazepam unintentionally. So it reduced to 0.5mg Lorazepam (Night) only gradually. 

At Early January 2024, I switched from Lorazepam to Diazepam. So it is 5mg Diazepam (Night) for the whole day. Headache, dizziness and "Fight or Flight" mode as expected because that's what I got in previous stages. Well... Something odd kicks in now. My hip joint started becoming painful and also cricking sound while moving. I waited for around 1 week and hope it will fade away, just like the stomachache and toothache before. But the joint pain still exist and became worse day by day. Therefore, I thought it may not be a withdrawal symptoms but a real health problem instead.

So I decided to go to reach a doctor. The doctor suspected it may be an Arthritis so he gave me Ibuprofen for that. Oh My God that's the worst day in my life and I literally felt like I am going to die after taking the NSAIDs. I stopped taking the Ibuprofen immediately but I still don't really realized what happened. I thought it is nothing related to Benzo... I did my stupidest decision in my life (LITERALLY). I pressed on my tapering.

I did all of the checking I can do. MRI for spine, blood test & urine test. Everything shows that I am good except the MRI shows a mild disc bulge. It is so mild that the doctor said it probably would not be the source of such a severe pain. My doctor's guess is, the muscle unbalance and contraction caused the pain. So, he forwarded me to go to physiology and that's late March 2024 (3 weeks later).

I am on 2mg Diazepam since Mid February (been 2 weeks now) and I think I screwed up... Headache, dizziness and "Fight or Flight" mode are on the same level as the beginning of tapering. Somehow I can manage to get 5 hours sleep but it is still not sufficient. The lack of sleeping time makes things worse. My parents are concerned on my condition and I don't want to worry them.

I am so afraid to raise the dosage. Should I stay in 2mg Diazepam? What should I do... Currently just try my best to follow my daily routine in December.

Thank you for reading the whole long story.

Edited March 2 by [da...]

[[Pa...]]

Hello @[da...], welcome to BenzoBuddies,

As I was reading your post, I was concerned about the speed of your taper but it appears you waited until you saw an improvement of symptoms before reducing again.  Sometimes when not enough time is allowed between reductions, they can pile up on each other and members will get hit pretty severely with the accumulation of reductions but I don't know if I see that in your case.

Benzodiazepines are very good muscle relaxers and it appears yours may be complaining about taking them away.  

May I ask, when you made the switch to only Diazepam in early January, did you allow time for the drug to fully build up in your system before making a reduction?  

If your quality of life is suffering too much, it might be helpful to go up in dose just a bit in order to get stable then you can resume your taper.  Its important to allow time for your brain to catch up to the reductions, this can help your post taper recovery. 

I hope we can help you get this sorted out, but I'm so happy to know your family is supportive of your efforts, that counts for a lot.

@[Pa...]

[[da...]]

@[Pa...]

In January, I started to split the Diazepam into portions. 2mg (Morning) + 3mg (Night). Sometimes I reduce the day time 2mg to 1mg in a relatively comfortable day. So that's a 4mg day.

I did this from Early January to now. The route goes roughly 2+3, then 1+3, 1+2, 0+2. So now I reached 0+2 so it is 2mg for a day.

After reviewing the posts in the forum, I found out my tapering is quite rush comparing to others...

I do think I have to let my brain to catch up the process. Should I increase it or just tolerant it for longer time? If so, how much would be a proper portion of increasement?

[[Pa...]]

The reason I asked about how you transitioned to Diazepam is because you seemed to take a turn for the worse then and I suspect it was because you didn't allow enough time for your body to fully realize the Diazepam.  As I mentioned, it can take awhile for it to build up, so most will wait 1 to 2 weeks before making a reduction.

But yes, even though you've waited until symptoms have lessened before making another reduction, you have tapered quickly. 

I need to caution you to take the same dose every day until its time to make another reduction.  I'm not sure if you're saying you'll reduce again when you have an okay day but its best not to make decisions about reductions based on that.  Its best to use the time between reductions to record your symptoms and their severity to help you make a decision when and how much to reduce again.

The decision to up-dose or hold should be based on your level of functionality, there is no shame in going up in dose if your symptoms are intolerable but be advised going up in dose doesn't always translate to symptom relief.  

[[da...]]

@[Pa...]
Sorry for the late reply.

I've up-dosed from 2mg Diazepam (night) to 2.5mg Diazepam (night) 3 days ago (4 March 2024). That gives me a little bit of relief and the symptoms are barely tolerable. I always feel tiring. 1 or 2 hours of concentrating (reading or writing) is my best and I have to rest myself afterwards (listening to music or so). I also started stretching (half an hour) and it did relief some of the muscle pain (maybe the up-dose helps too but I'm not sure). My sleeping time is a bit jumpy. Sometimes 5 hours and sometimes got 9 hours. The sleeping time affects the quality of day greatly so I try my best to get a good sleep.

So my plan is to stay on 2.5mg Diazepam (night) for at least 2 weeks. Is it sounds appropriate? Or should I stay on 2.5mg Diazepam (night) until I feel fully comfortable? If not, what is the alternate way?

What would be the recommended course for my remaining dosage reduction? I am a bit afraid that I am off-tracked again. 

Thank you!

[[Pa...]]

I'm glad you got a bit of relief and believe holding is a good idea.  What we typically suggest when a member is holding is to observe their symptoms and record them as I mentioned in a previous post.  When you feel stable, then its time for another reduction but I need to define stable.  To us, stable is when you can perform your basic daily tasks, showering, simple meal preparation, things like that.  Its also when your symptoms have settled a bit, there are no drastic changes happening.  As you can see, stable doesn't mean feeling good, that is reserved for full recovery I'm afraid.

As for your next reduction, I'm assuming you have the 2 mg tablets?  How have you been reducing thus far, have you been cutting your Lorazepam and Diazepam tablets and if so, with what? 

 

 

[[da...]]

I use a pill cutter to cut the pills into 1/2 or 1/4. 1/8 is not accurate anymore because the pill is too small.
I had the 1mg and 2mg combination for Lorazepam so I didn't get any trouble before.

But now I converted to Diazepam only and I only have 5mg tablet for Diazepam. I am taking 2.5mg a day now so it's still fine. A clean cut can be made easily with the cutter. But I have no clue how make it into 2mg or smaller precisely.

I saw that someone use a 0.001g (1mg) scale to weight the pills after crushing it. Is it really work? I think I should get myself one.

In the past few days, things didn't changed much (maybe slightly towards to the good way but I am not very sure.) I am just glad that it is not getting worse. I do the half an hour stretching everyday and it helps (both muscle pain and mentally). Still getting the jumpy sleeping time and I try my best to get at least 5 hours everyday. Mostly got 6 or 7 hours. Sometimes(maybe 2 or 3 times a day) my breathing is getting too quick, so I have to focus and slow it down. It usually takes me 10 or 15 mins to regulate my breathing tempo, so it is a bit annoying. I am planning to stay on the 2.5mg Diazepam for at least one more week. Just to play safe. 

Thank you!

@[Pa...]