Quit Clonazepam CT...I'm struggling

[[Ru...]]

I'm new here, but have reading through the forums for the last 4 days and decided to join.

I was prescribed Clonazepam .5 mg twice a day in 2013 due to anxiety.

In 2016, I successfully stopped taking it, cold turkey, after being tired of feeling so crappy from taking it.

Was prescribed it again in 2018 and only took when needed.

In March 2020, on the day of my state's shutdown, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I was in chemo 6 days later. Because it was a whirlwind of events, my anxiety got the better of me and I found myself having to take it clonazepam daily. I ended up with a recurrence in 2021 and in active treatment through 2022. Since then I've been on it at least once a day until last week. 

Last week, I stopped it cold turkey (today is day seven). Now I'm terrified due to the withdrawal symptoms, mostly the racing heart. I have this awful fear of going into cardiac arrest. 

Not sure if I should go back and do a slow taper.

To say that I'm scared and feel helpless is an understament.

 

Edited February 21 by [Ru...]

[[Pa...]]

Hello @[Ru...], welcome to BenzoBuddies,

I'm so sorry to hear of your breast cancer and its reoccurrence, I hope you're in the clear now?

I'm concerned about your cold turkey, especially since you've done it before, there is a chance this time will involve more symptoms with greater intensity.  There is a theory called kindling which I happen to agree with that might apply to your situation. Kindling - Benzodiazepine Information Coalition (benzoinfo.com)

You can still recover from this but it could mean more suffering.  Have you ever had a seizure, those who are prone to them risk having one while doing a cold turkey so I hope you have someone there with you.

You have the option of reinstating and doing a slow taper, if you have a doctor willing to prescribe enough to see you through, are you interested in discussing this?

We're glad you're here and hope we can help.

Pamster

[[Ru...]]

@[Pa...]

Thank you for your response and your kind words!

I am in the clear, thank God!

I have not ever had a seizure, but it was something that crossed my mind and scares me. 

I will read into the information you've given on kindling!

My doctor will definitely get me through this. I sent him a message this morning, he's on vacation until Monday and doesn't know I stopped. I have enough to get me through until I see him, if I do decide to restart.

If I were to do a taper, would I do the normal dose or could I get away with half being that I haven't taken any in a week? I hate the idea of back pedaling. 

 

 

 

 

 

[[je...]]

I'm so sorry for everything you've been through. What dose have you been on when you stopped? I had something similar happen to me, not quite off but huge reduction and I went back up to stabilize and taper, but not the full dose. I'm so glad I didn't go back up all the way. 

[[Ru...]]

@[je...]

I was taking .5 mg up to twice a day.

My doctor just called me and scolded me for not talking to him first so he could help me taper off. I was just instructed to take a half a pill until he sees me next week.

I can't believe I did this to myself. I should have known better.

Can I ask what dose you are taking and for how long?

[[je...]]

I think going back to 0.5mg is a good start. But then I suggest you hold it for at least 6 weeks so your body can recover. If you start tapering too early you will likely struggle again. 

I'm 14 months off now. I started at 2mg (which I took for 2-3 years), but had an incorrect script and went down to 0.5mg for 3 weeks. I was extremely sick. I then updosed to 1mg and tapered from there.

[[Ru...]]

Thank you @[je...]

[[Pa...]]

I'm happy to hear your doctor is going to work with you and pleased @[je...] weighed in with her experience, I hope you and your doctor will take her advice about holding, this is very important. 

Just so you know, we suggest reducing by around 5-10 every few weeks or whenever your symptoms settle enough to do another reduction.  I hope your doctor will agree to let you taper according to your symptoms, rushing this process just results in more pain since getting benzo free is only the first step, next comes recovery and it can take as long or longer than the taper.  So, our feeling is, we might as well use the drug to minimize symptoms because once we're free of it, we won't be able to. 

[[Ru...]]

I agree @[Pa...] with everything you said. 

My doctor will work with me. I just never want to feel like that again, but taking into account what could happen. I do know that this is not something I want to be on any longer than I have to anymore. I've read that there's an increased risk of developing dementia from being on it. It's the reason I stopped.  My family has a history of dementia, including my father (currently), but only in the males, with the exception of one female cousin who developed it. However, she was on a benzo and many other meds all of her life due to epilepsy she developed from having polio as a child. With me having endured two years of chemo, both intravenously and oral, having had five surgeries in three years, I'm afraid of what my chances are in developing it. I need to be proactive now.

This is a great site and I will be sticking around.

Edited February 21 by [Ru...]

[[Pa...]]

Hey @[Ru...], I saw I left out something important in my last post to you, we suggest reducing by 5-10%, I left out the percentage sign, sorry about that. 

We've had many members join due to concerns about the possibility of dementia, I don't blame you for being worried, especially with your family history and recent trauma to your poor body.  I'm happy to hear you're clear of cancer, but I understand what a battle its been, I think we all know someone who has faced that terrible disease. 

 

[[An...]]

CT is never advised. You said this is day 7 CT. Have you still not taken anything yet?

[[Ru...]]

@[An...]

I'll never do that again! I should've known better. Smh.

I took it about 4.5 hours ago. I felt better about half hour later. My heart just started racing again and I'm starting to get shakey. I'm guessing I'll be feeling crappy until my system readjusts.

Edited February 22 by [Ru...]
Typos

[[Pa...]]

You're right @[Ru...], it may take awhile for things to settle, it takes a lot to pull us out of severe withdrawal symptoms.  

[[je...]]

I started feeling better the next day after my updose, but I was never fully back to "normal". I was functional, but I never felt 100% again. But functional was great for me, because I was bedridden for 3 days. I could not get myself out of bed, and suddenly I was able to move around again and go back to work and look after my family. I'm just mentioning this because we never know what our expectations should be and for me it was always difficult to determine how much 'bad and terrible' is acceptable to feel during tapering. I felt pretty sick throughout my taper but I was never in benzo hell or as disabled as many people on here. However in hindsight I do feel I should've tapered slower because looking at others I felt since I wasn't suffering as much as they were, I needed to 'suck it up and be grateful'. But my taper could probably have been less painful if I did less of a comparison and been kinder to myself. 

If within the next 3 days you still feel you're struggling badly, you might want to consider another slight increase. 

[[Su...]]

Oh Rubi01, I am so sorry for all that you have been through! I know the feeling of wanting off the junk Rxs we are given immediately but a CT can be too hard, from my experience. I've done a couple. And gotten back on for a slow taper and was so glad I did. My worst was CT off paxil a few years ago. It took 2 weeks for sxs to really get bad and by then I didn't even associate them with the WD. I was in the ER twice, admitted once for a few days and was only getting worse. It had been 3 months off when I reinstated and I am so glad I did. I know you are getting good advice here and pray that you find the answer that is right for you. You've had enough stress for a lifetime and need to be gentle with yourself. Bless you! 

[[Ru...]]

@[Su...] thank you! 

It's been a rough morning emotionally. I'm feeling a sense of guilt. I know that it's for the best to do a taper though, so that's what I'll do under the supervision of my doctor. Physically I feel better, but will be laying low for today as I'm still achy, having some jitters and heart racing. 

 

[[An...]]

Good @[Ru...]. I hope things settle down for you and allow you to do a slow safe sensible taper. Don't get me wrong! A slow taper can be really hard but nothing compared to a CT.

Benzo w/d has nothing to do with psychological willpower.

Benzo w/d is a physiologically sick brain trying to restore homeostasis after you take away a drug that has become a part of its native brain chemistry. When you snatch that drug away all of a sudden that you have been taking for a long time, the brain goes crazy and you get all these almost intolerable, painful, bizarre physical and psychological SXs.