Just beginning

[[Ja...]]

Just starting my journey coming of diazepam,I’ve been on them just over a year,.I started them as coming of several anti ds left me in a mess after 20 odd year on and of them,prescribed mood stabilisers as I was that bad I thought I had bipolar,.came of them with the help of cannabis,.but after so long on anti ds being straight while smoking cannabis at nights didn’t help,it was just giving me a bit of life but made my anxiety a lot worse,.so came back to diazepam that I’d took for over 10 year in the past,.only a prison sentence got me of them I had no choice,.it was only 20 mg a day over a long period but that was my first proper experience coming of Valium,.I was given 2.5 mg in a syrup over a 3 day period in there and that was it done,.the next month was a living hell,with so many people around me while I was going through this was surreal,.I was on the verge of hallucinating for over 10 days,.I had to go into 24 hr watch as it was uncontrollable,.when I eventually got through the first 2 week I went on sertlarene right away,.I was way to intense and felt really manic,.10 month later I got out of there,.but I think the damage has been done,.my anxiety was on total another level,.my partner says I come back a different man,.it wasn’t the prison,it was coming of the Valium way to quick,.so to this day after 11 year I’ve still struggled with that same anxiety but with Stress/Tinnitus /Depression,Unstable emotions,.so yea took it all into my own hands and started Valium again,.This time it’s been 2 X 10mg night and day,.and Truly a relief of what I put up with mentally,but yea start of the year I decided to kick them,.since I’ve been of everything else since last summer and this is the last hurdle,.so I’m quickly down from 20 mg to 10mg since January,splitting it,.and been hit with a huge depression allready,.I think I might be through it so decided to go down to 5mg split in 2 start of feb,..well 6 days in and it’s hello withdrawal,.I reckonise all the symptoms but with bad mental health underneath,.This is going to be a seriously testing,..I found out about this site on YouTube and I’m glad I did,.been through a good few folks stories,.and even with going through this before I know this place is going to help me on this 1,.I’m going to keep posting my progress and follow and help folk in the same boat,.in a bad situation it’s good to be able to resonate,.I know I’ve cut down to quick allready and I’ll address it if I carnt deal with it,.so yea the mad journey of coming of has started.

[[Pa...]]

Hello @[Ja...], welcome to BenzoBuddies,

I’m sorry to hear of your horrific cold turkey from diazepam, I can’t imagine how bad that must have been for you in that setting.  I’m glad you reinstated so you can hopefully be done with this medication once and for all but I wonder if you’re doing this too quickly?

I’m sure you understand there is a period of time we take to recover so using the drug to minimize symptoms while you’re still taking it makes sense because you won’t be able to use it after you jump off of it. 

You know, its tough to pinpoint what’s really going on while we’re withdrawing from these medications, they mess us up so much, we can’t automatically assume we have “bad mental health” issues until we’re fully recovered from our use so please don’t label yourself when you could come out of this perfectly fine. 

We’re glad you found us and hope we can reassure you that you can recover, it just takes too long.

[[Ja...]]

Thanks for that reply Pam,your right I had to go up to 7.5 last night,2 nights of insomnia backed me right up,.after nearly a week going to 5 mg I’ll see if I can handle 7.5,looks like another phone call to the mental health team today,.really not ready for this taper just now

[[...]]

4 minutes ago, [[J...] said:

Vielen Dank für die Antwort, Pam. Du hast Recht, ich musste letzte Nacht auf 7,5 steigen, zwei Nächte Schlaflosigkeit haben mich sofort unterstützt. Nachdem ich fast eine Woche auf 5 mg umgestiegen bin, werde ich sehen, ob ich mit 7,5 klarkomme, sieht aus wie ein anderes Telefon Rufen Sie heute das Team für psychische Gesundheit an. Ich bin im Moment wirklich nicht bereit für diese Reduzierung

Hey ! I am on 10 mg from 150 mg Valium.

If you want to talk feel free to PM me or do it here in your thread.

[[Pa...]]

5 hours ago, [[J...] said:

Thanks for that reply Pam,your right I had to go up to 7.5 last night,2 nights of insomnia backed me right up,.after nearly a week going to 5 mg I’ll see if I can handle 7.5,looks like another phone call to the mental health team today,.really not ready for this taper just now

We have to be able to function, and if going back up and tapering slower will allow this then I hope the mental health team will recognize its for the best.