Lost In Denver

[[je...]]

1 hour ago, [[D...] said:

Thank you so much for the love and kind words. They mean so much, it feels really dark right now. 

You are not alone. We understand how bad it is. But one way or another you will get through it. 

[[je...]]

How are you doing @[De...]?

[[De...]]

Hi all, wanted to share that I’ve ended my taper today on .25 and jumped for the first time. Planning to continue in residence and transfer to IOp in about 2 weeks. Switched over to gabpentin which has been helpful. Still not sleeping well but staying active and doing intensive therapy. Also avoiding caffeine has been helpful thus far. I can always reinstate but staying the course for now.

Thank you for all the support this community has offered in conjunction with my therapy. 

[[De...]]

I’m also 22 days off Ambien which I’m super proud of 🙂

[[Pa...]]

So, you're benzo free, is that what I'm reading??  How are you now?  Its good to see you're still Ambien free, you're so committed to this, great work doing all of the therapy! 

[[De...]]

Hello all.

I wanted to share I’m now 11 days sober  and into my benzo recovery. Also 30 days since my last Ambien. Feeling optimistic and clear eyes. 

Heading home on Saturday but wanted to share my thanks for all the love and support from this community. 

[[Pa...]]

Thanks for checking in @[De...], you're going home, you'll be with your family?  I hope you'll continue to share your experience, we're rooting for you. 

[[De...]]

Yes leaving in residence after 30 days here. Will start IOP next week but really looking forward to getting home and so grateful to have gotten this far. Lot of work ahead 🙂

[[De...]]

I will share more about my journey as I get past a few months, but I will say the place I am in has positively and undoubtedly changed my life. ❤️

[[Pa...]]

26 minutes ago, [[D...] said:

I will share more about my journey as I get past a few months, but I will say the place I am in has positively and undoubtedly changed my life. ❤️

This is so good to hear, yes, please share when you can because most of the detox experiences we've seen documented here have been negative, it would be wonderful to give others hope. 

A big congratulations for freeing yourself of these medications!

[[je...]]

47 minutes ago, [[D...] said:

I will share more about my journey as I get past a few months, but I will say the place I am in has positively and undoubtedly changed my life. ❤️

So happy to hear it's working out for you and that you're going home soon. How are you feeling?

[[De...]]

Hi @[je...] — I’m home now and 15 days sober from my last benzo. My mood has stabilized and my sleep has improved ❤️. My baseline tremors/shaking has also stopped. 

I can shed a little bit on my experience. Detox was pure hell. They really just stabilized my dosage and cut my Ambien cold turkey. The following 30 days, they bring you up to a lodge in the mountains. That was where I started to make progress, but had some insanely low moments (shaking, cold sweats, barely and hour or 2 of sleep per night). The days leading up to the end of my taper and the following 2 days after I jumped were the worst. Then i started to see some daylight, and i just worked my ass off to keep one foot in front of the other, make it to groups and processing. The process groups were by far the most helpful, especially during the darkest days. I really just had one rule, no matter how shitty I felt, I’d make it to morning process group.

I’ll also say that I was not alone. There were several other people there who’d kicked benzos who helped me through (quite literally). Sat with me while I cried, got me some tea, talked me down. That was honestly the most helpful and I will forever owe my life to those folks.

I know there’s a strong stigma against treatment centers, but for me it saved my life.

It’s still a struggle, and I’m in PAWS at home recovering, but every day is better than the last and feel like myself again.

I don’t know if sharing this helps anyone, but will do anything I can to repay this community for your kindness. 

 

[[PE...]]

On 29/01/2024 at 05:29, [[D...] said:

Sorry I have one more question.

recently the ambien has almost totally stopped working. The last few nights I’ve fallen right asleep then awake 2 hours later. I think the medication is starting to wear off and I’m thinking of stopping ambien cold turkey or reducing the dose significantly. Given that it’s barely working at the moment, should I consider just cutting ambien and holding steady with the K. The lack of sleep is killing me and giving me anxiety throughout the day, despite holding on the K. I don’t want to make a snap judgement, but I also don’t want to keep taking A if it’s not really working. 

Hi!

Sounds like you have reached a tolerance with Ambien. Also z drug's are very short acting so if you wake up after a couple of hours after taking it could be why? 

If I were you i would stop the z drug first and taper out K. Regards insomnia it's impossible to not get any symptoms while quitting this mess and insomnia is the most common one.

Good luck 😊

[[De...]]

@[PE...] thanks Peppe! Happy to say I’m 35ish days off Ambien and 15 days off benzos. I did exactly what you mentioned, had to cold turkey Ambien. I regret ever taking those 2 meds at the same time. 😭

[[PE...]]

On 26/03/2024 at 23:39, [[D...] said:

@[PE...] thanks Peppe! Happy to say I’m 35ish days off Ambien and 15 days off benzos. I did exactly what you mentioned, had to cold turkey Ambien. I regret ever taking those 2 meds at the same time. 😭

Good news! 

Hoping for a speedy recovery:))

[[Pa...]]

We appreciate you sharing your experience, and I’m glad it was helpful, hopefully others will find what you did.  I can understand how being there with other benzo experienced people would be comforting, no one else can understand what this drug does to us.

Do you have plans for aftercare?