Random setback at 1.5 years out

[[Ea...]]

Hello,

Long time stalker, first time poster. I was on different PRN benzos for 10 years, taking only 1-2 a month in the last 3-5 years, often none a month. Still, one day, it triggered withdrawal early 2022 February. I fully healed in 2022, all the mental symptoms were gone by September and I only had 2 waves in July and August - both very manageable. The first 2-4 months were a very dark time though..

I felt a 100% after healing, no anxiety at all, socializing, doing stuff, absolutely like I never took any benzos in my life at all.

So fast forward, I think I triggered a setback this summer. I started feeling weird in early September, nothing panicky though and then on November 13th, for some odd reason, a full on setback started. I had a wave, I'd say a 4, that disappeared in a week. Then another wave started in 2 weeks, that was a 5-6 and now last week a wave that is a 7. Between the waves I've felt pretty good, but definitely not a 100% all the time. Before this 7 scale wave, I actually had 3.5 days without any symptoms basically.

What I am asking is:

1. Is it normal for a setback to get stronger in time? 

2. Thoughts on using pregabalin (Lyrica) on the darkest days of a wave. I am not in a good mental space, because the waves have gotten stronger and it is demotivating for me. I have never used it before, but the doctors say that since I am a bit suicidal, it might be a good option, just to take the edge off the waves until I get better.

 

Edited December 28, 2023 by [Ea...]

[[Pa...]]

Hello @[Ea...],welcome to BenzoBuddies,

I’m sorry to hear you’re facing this, can we get a bit more information?  Can you tell us what triggered your setback, it must have been something traumatic to have caused this and is it still going on?

Have you had a full physical work up and did you add any new medications or supplements before or after this event?  Can you list some of your symptoms for us?  Are they more mental or physical? 

I’m not doubting your symptoms, we all know what they feel like, there’s not mistaking them but I’m curious about how this all came about and if there is more explanation and possibly a way to get back on track.  

I’m grateful you’ve sought medical help, do your doctors recognize benzodiazepine’s as the possibly culprits?

We’re glad you found us and I hope we can help you find a solution 

Pamster

[[Ea...]]

I was very active during the summer, but it was also very stressful due to some personal events that took place. So it might be either any of those things.

I haven't had full physical checkups, but I am pretty sure that these are benzo symptoms. Classic waves and all else that goes with it. Just no burning of skin this time and no benzo belly.

My GP prescribed the benzos and I came off cold turkey, without letting anyone know. They all believe this is benzo related though, I am meeting a new psychiatrist today.

[[Pa...]]

I’m relieved to hear your doctors believe you, its one of the worst experiences when they discount us. 

To address your questions, I’ve read about setbacks and they seem to come on, get worse then slowly go away, I’m hopeful the same will be true for you.

I don’t have experience with Lyrica but if you start a thread in the Health Matters forum using the medication name in the title its likely others will stop by or you could use the search function to fine some answers. 

 

[[Ea...]]

Thank you, I'm glad to hear that I am not the only one who'se setback got worse in time. I was starting to worry about it.

[[bw...]]

Yes had a severe setback at 5yrs 3 mos off. From taking pepcid.

 

Be warned lyrica works on Gaba.

I wouldnt dare touch it. With time you will come around again. Eat healthy. Sunlight. Excercise if you can. Distract.

[[Ho...]]

It's hard when you've been well for so long and suddenly thrown back! Sounds like something emotionally devastating took place and took a big toll on your well-being. With this, there isn't a whole lot that's under your control. But you can set the stage for getting well, and do the things that will do you the most good. It's a bit Groundhog Day, but that's just how it is at times. We roll with the punches.

When devastating life events happen, it's easy to run to meds to blunt the pain. Well, not easy, but so available and tempting, you can't help but think, I need the help, now more than ever. It's a bit counterintuitive but give yourself the time to consider wisely. Pregabalin isn't an antidepressant, which makes me wonder why it's being encouraged unless you have pain. Better to take gabapentin at the lowest dose and see if that helps; it relaxes. It's easier on the body from what I understand, although I'm not a medical professional. 

Please consider going to all the things that make for a healthier life: exercise, clean eating (fresh whole foods, avoiding processed foods, alcohol and caffeine) and lots of wateriest as @[bw...] said. Put some distractions on the table for yourself. Remember deep breathing. Handle yourself gently and kindly and don't get frustrated with yourself; you didn't put yourself here and you can't really get yourself out. 

Keep living your life as best you can. When you have to stop due to being overwhelmed or feeling awful, listen to yourself. Take the time out and rest. This could very well be short-lived! It's quite likely. You healed quickly which is probably a very good sign. These are blips because stressors kicked in not long after your healing. This will pass.

Anyway, my thoughts!!

Warmly,

HCHC

[[Ea...]]

Love to all, thanks! I'll look into gabapentin as well.

[[Ea...]]

I actually have another question, the doctors are saying that they actually don't know of any benzo setbacks and it sounds illogical in the neurological sense. They seem pretty wise, not some uneducated old doctors, but doctors working with benzo detoxes in acute.

They say that maybe this is GAD and you should be put on a dose of AD-s, so the anxiety levels can even out. I know we're all anti-medicine here, but what are your thoughts on the matter at hand? Maybe this is GAD? Maybe I should do a 3-6 month Lexapro run, to get rid of this anxiety?

What's worrying me the most and what I don't get is why is this "setback" getting worse? Why have there been bigger waves as time goes by, not smaller waves? 

Edited January 8 by [Ea...]

[[PE...]]

On 28/12/2023 at 12:12, [[E...] said:

Hello,

Long time stalker, first time poster. I was on different PRN benzos for 10 years, taking only 1-2 a month in the last 3-5 years, often none a month. Still, one day, it triggered withdrawal early 2022 February. I fully healed in 2022, all the mental symptoms were gone by September and I only had 2 waves in July and August - both very manageable. The first 2-4 months were a very dark time though..

I felt a 100% after healing, no anxiety at all, socializing, doing stuff, absolutely like I never took any benzos in my life at all.

So fast forward, I think I triggered a setback this summer. I started feeling weird in early September, nothing panicky though and then on November 13th, for some odd reason, a full on setback started. I had a wave, I'd say a 4, that disappeared in a week. Then another wave started in 2 weeks, that was a 5-6 and now last week a wave that is a 7. Between the waves I've felt pretty good, but definitely not a 100% all the time. Before this 7 scale wave, I actually had 3.5 days without any symptoms basically.

What I am asking is:

1. Is it normal for a setback to get stronger in time? 

2. Thoughts on using pregabalin (Lyrica) on the darkest days of a wave. I am not in a good mental space, because the waves have gotten stronger and it is demotivating for me. I have never used it before, but the doctors say that since I am a bit suicidal, it might be a good option, just to take the edge off the waves until I get better.

I know for sure that Lyrica_pregabalin has a very nasty WD. Basicly it's gabapentin on steroids.

But if you take them only when needed my guees you be ok. 

I have a close friend that was on huge doses, 900mg a day, and was in a bad place for 3 months after quitting.

[[Pa...]]

May I ask why you were originally prescribed benzodiazepines? 

[[Ea...]]

Honestly, just bad sleep, small anxiety on airplanes, bad day here and there, but the anxiety was never big. No GAD, no heavy anxiety. Could've managed without them easily, GP just prescribed them easily. I was never on them daily, just PRN, but for a long time.

[[Pa...]]

@[Ea...], you’ve just described my reasons for initially taking benzodiazepines, with a GP prescribing them.  I didn’t have anxiety or experience panic attacks, I was looking for sleep.  But as my body grew dependent, then tolerant, I soon learned what those with GAD faced because the drug turns on us and then causes what it’s prescribed to treat.

The timing of your setbacks interest me, I went through this with a close friend, after he stopped Ambien, he was miserable but as time went on (just under a year), he noticed a kind of rhythm to his symptoms. He was on a 3 week schedule, he’d feel good for about 3 weeks, then suffer with symptoms for about a week, then it would repeat.  As he got closer to recovery, we’d count the days and finally, the 3 weeks went to 4, 4 to 5 and then we finally declared him fully recovered.  But you know what, just the other day, he felt symptoms, just for a few hours then he was fine.  I guess what I’m saying is, this process is wild and we can’t predict it. 

I’m not anti-medication but I’m also not for labeling someone with a mental condition when there is a possibility that the condition is not real but is in fact, mimicking it.  If you decide to take the Lexepro, I hope it brings you relief but please don’t wear a label that doesn’t fit you. 

 

[[st...]]

I agree don't touch pregabalin. I'd actually tried it BEFORE benzos. I read things saying "it helps with benzodiazepine withdrawals" but they will rehash anything to up sales.

Bottom line from my experience. It's a benzo.. With pain receptor effects as well, so possibly even worse in a way.

[[Ea...]]

@[Pa...] you have been here for long. Have setbacks ever stopped happening for some? Or do they keep forever happening, even if we are absolutely symptom and anxiety free between them? I really need some encouragment, I couldn't find anything on this site about it.

[[Ga...]]

On 09/01/2024 at 08:17, [[P...] said:

@[Ea...], you’ve just described my reasons for initially taking benzodiazepines, with a GP prescribing them.  I didn’t have anxiety or experience panic attacks, I was looking for sleep.  But as my body grew dependent, then tolerant, I soon learned what those with GAD faced because the drug turns on us and then causes what it’s prescribed to treat.

The timing of your setbacks interest me, I went through this with a close friend, after he stopped Ambien, he was miserable but as time went on (just under a year), he noticed a kind of rhythm to his symptoms. He was on a 3 week schedule, he’d feel good for about 3 weeks, then suffer with symptoms for about a week, then it would repeat.  As he got closer to recovery, we’d count the days and finally, the 3 weeks went to 4, 4 to 5 and then we finally declared him fully recovered.  But you know what, just the other day, he felt symptoms, just for a few hours then he was fine.  I guess what I’m saying is, this process is wild and we can’t predict it. 

I’m not anti-medication but I’m also not for labeling someone with a mental condition when there is a possibility that the condition is not real but is in fact, mimicking it.  If you decide to take the Lexepro, I hope it brings you relief but please don’t wear a label that doesn’t fit you. 

 

[[Ga...]]

Pamster, forgive me for weighing in but your remark about your friend’s recovery pattern brought me to an awareness that my own recovery pattern is very similar to your friend’s. I am much further out in my recovery at 46 months, but have recently noticed a pattern of three weeks feeling really good, followed by a seven to ten day wave!   You are so right that this is still uncharted territory with many unknowns still.  I am happy for your friend’s recovery!

And to Eastern Buddy, I hope you return to a more stable pattern soon.  These ups and downs are not for the faint hearted!  As for the Lyrica, I was given it back in the 1990’s for what was thought to be fibromyalgia, and had awful side effects.  Was yanked off it quickly after one month and ended up having what I now surmise was withdrawal symptoms.

GG

[[Pa...]]

14 hours ago, [[E...] said:

@[Pa...] you have been here for long. Have setbacks ever stopped happening for some? Or do they keep forever happening, even if we are absolutely symptom and anxiety free between them? I really need some encouragment, I couldn't find anything on this site about it.

I’ve been around BenzoBuddies for a long time and most members recover completely.  I never had a setback but plenty of people have and after awhile, they don’t happen anymore.  It takes a long time for our central nervous system to settle and not be so sensitive but it happens as long as we stay away from the substance that got us here to begin with. 

[[Ea...]]

Thank you!