Body Scared of Sleep

[[Br...]]

Hello all I was wondering if anyone can relate to me I had an event occur that gave me PTSD diagnosed by my psychiatrist so I was put on a short course of ativan to be able to sleep a few nights after it happened. I started it on the 12th. 2 mg was making me sleep all night and not giving me any day time issues besides increased noise sensitivity and a bit more on edge. Well on Friday I decided to donate half a pint of blood due to my blood work being a bit off, and after that I felt really really strange all day. I tried to lay down on my couch and noticed when i closed my eyes my heart would start sinking. I tried to go out to dinner and couldn’t focus on anything or anyone I. was with and felt totally out of body. Now whenever I try to sleep it’s as if my body is afraid to go into sleep, my heart sinks, my limbs jerk, my muscles twitch, and sometimes I have full body torso jerks in the morning where it makes me jump up a bit. I also now have burning arms and tongue and akathisia very badly that I didn’t have to this extent before. I’m very agitated and angry which I also wasn’t before. I am doing a rapid taper since I haven’t been on it long and will be having my last pill on the 14th/15th day of being on them. I went down to 1.5 mg and still slept then last night I took 1 mg and didn’t sleep much and had a lot of those bad symptoms. I will be going down to .5 mg today and then .25 mg then dropping off. I am really scared. I didn’t have any of these issues before taking the benzo but I was so desperate to sleep and not have flashbacks and knew I had no plans on taking it longer than two weeks. Is this taper too fast based on my symptoms? Is it possible all these horrible things will go away once this is gone since It’s been such short time? I’m wondering if i have some type of interdose withdrawal issue. I’m so lost i’m am only 23

[[Bu...]]

bump

 

[[Br...]]

@[Bu...] do you mean go back up to my normal dose? or what? 

[[or...]]

16 minutes ago, [[B...] said:

@[Bu...] do you mean go back up to my normal dose? or what? 

I don't think so @breeb

@[Bu...] is getting your post to show up at the top of the lists of posts again. To make your post be sure to be seen, like I just saw it!!

I don't know much at all about Ativan but lots of people here have experience with it so hopefully, someone will chime in.  This is only an opinion, I'm no doctor, just been on Clonazepam for many years and tapering off now. I believe any benzo taken almost any amount of time, can have wd sxs when tapering, or cold turkey.  The most important thing I've learned about getting off a benzo, is everyone of us is different in how we react, and what we can tolerate, or want to tolerate.

I personally believe in a slow and steady taper, mine is 3% per month, but I suspect yours could be much larger , but maybe just 10% then wait til our body feels stable, least amount of wd sxs before we taper again.

I can understand wanting to do it faster, and for some this works, but for others, it was almost intolerable.  It's a big decision, but you could make it for yourself as long as your doctor complies, and you can make your taper choice by how your body feels, including your mind and emotions, you are in a good place being with others that can relate because they've been through this, stick with us, I'm so glad you are here oregonlady

[[or...]]

Wanted to add the Link to a video that helped me a lot.  If you want to dig into a bit more about benzos, wd sxs, and tapering, I love this lady Heather Ashton.  I have learned a lot from this one video.  Also, I'll post the link to The Ashton Manual in case you would like to take a look.  But I have found the best help with one on one with others who have gone before me in getting off benzos or are on their progress in tapering oregonlady

PS Even though some have been on a benzo for a short time, it's experienced that they had bad wd even with short-term use of a benzo.  Just wanted to reiterate that. 

Ashton Manual

Video on Withdrawal etc.

 

[[Br...]]

36 minutes ago, [[B...] said:

@[Bu...] do you mean go back up to my normal dose? or what? 

Hi @[Br...] -  As @[or...] says, when people post "Bump" they are trying to push the thread up higher so it will be more visible and get more responses.  

[[Br...]]

44 minutes ago, [[o...] said:

I don't think so @breeb

@[Bu...] is getting your post to show up at the top of the lists of posts again. To make your post be sure to be seen, like I just saw it!!

I don't know much at all about Ativan but lots of people here have experience with it so hopefully, someone will chime in.  This is only an opinion, I'm no doctor, just been on Clonazepam for many years and tapering off now. I believe any benzo taken almost any amount of time, can have wd sxs when tapering, or cold turkey.  The most important thing I've learned about getting off a benzo, is everyone of us is different in how we react, and what we can tolerate, or want to tolerate.

I personally believe in a slow and steady taper, mine is 3% per month, but I suspect yours could be much larger , but maybe just 10% then wait til our body feels stable, least amount of wd sxs before we taper again.

I can understand wanting to do it faster, and for some this works, but for others, it was almost intolerable.  It's a big decision, but you could make it for yourself as long as your doctor complies, and you can make your taper choice by how your body feels, including your mind and emotions, you are in a good place being with others that can relate because they've been through this, stick with us, I'm so glad you are here oregonlady

The last two days I have tried to go down to 1 mg and i’m so much worse. The day after 1.5 mg wasn’t so bad. I’m not sure if I should go back up to 2 mg or the 1.5 or just jump off i’m seriously so confused my body is in such a mess it was already in a mess before the benzo so this is so confusing to me and with christmas right around the corner 

[[or...]]

if you feel you are tapering too much, just cut back on your next days taper.  For me, if I cut to lets say .25, which I actually did once, and got bad wd sxs, I would cut less than that next time, but I would do maybe a .20, and see how I feel.  No big jumps is what i am saying. This is all before I got really into BB and learned more about tapering.

I had BB to rely on when I had cut a whole 25%. I was told "if I could handle" it, hold that dose, push through the wd sxs.  I felt I could do that so I did.  It was rough for me but then when I finally stabilized on that cut, my body told me it was ok to start another cut/taper, but at much smaller doses at a time.  My "History" show more what I did, I think I tapered just 11% next, and eventually found that 3% was my best "lack of" wd sxs, so I've stuck with that.

I hope this makes sense, any questions are very welcome oregonlady

[[or...]]

I think more about Kindling now that I understand it better.  If I go back up to say, same dose or even more I am opening up myself to the possibility of Kindling.  How I understand this term, and paraphrasing what I've read, is that when we try the next taper, we can end up with much worse wd sxs.  That was a big reason I was told about hanging in there with the hard wd sxs because they kept telling me I would stabilize, and I did.  So now I want others to know about this.

I know there are those way more knowledgeable than I here about Kindling as well as so much more about updosing etc.  I'll flag a couple people and see if we can get more input here for you @[Pa...], @[he...], there are so many more I know of but will just list the first 2 that popped into my brain

[[Br...]]

I have only been on half of my dose the 1 mg for two days. if i were to go back up to 2 mg even though it’s only been three days at a lower dose this would still open the door to kindling for me? 

[[or...]]

1 minute ago, [[B...] said:

I have only been on half of my dose the 1 mg for two days. if i were to go back up to 2 mg even though it’s only been three days at a lower dose this would still open the door to kindling for me? 

Ok, I am not sure, not 100% either way, but if I could stand the taper I'd done, I am very sure I would hold at that dose and see if I could get stable.  I just wanted you to have more info on "what might happen".  Everyone has different experiences but holding at present dose seems to work the best for me and I've always become stable enough to want to cut more, oregonlady

[[Br...]]

@[or...] right now i can’t bear what is happening but i don’t know if it’s a direct toxic reaction to the drug or my body freaking out from lowering so quickly trying to rapid taper like 1 mg was half of what i was taking and i was having issues before ever cutting the dose but now that ive cut to 1 mg it’s unbearable what is going on but since i’m such short term part of wants to just jump off and tought it out i almost did that the other day before i had all these worsening symptoms and i didn’t i’m so stupid i think i wouid have been fine i was only on day 9

[[or...]]

I just don't recommend Cold Turkey to anyone, even short-timers (on benzo) because I've heard we can have wd sxs even after 2 weeks.  I just don't trust the info 100% because there are not enough studies out there, or at least not long term studies.  The Ashton Manual, and other link could help with more knowledgeable info.

But you have to decide, only you know what you can tolerate and what you can't.  I had another event happen when an MD was weaning me off a quarter tablet a month, way too fast for me.  My whole left side went numb for 3 days.  I let him reinstate me to full dose, at 1 mg.  In that situation, I was so scared I took it willingly.  So we have to decide ourselves unless we can't regulate our own tapers. I was also given nothing (no diagnosis) from all the tests they ran, and this was a couple Summers before I found BB by the way. I also had the highest anxiety, panic attacks aches and pains, more that I can't even recall right now.

Since you are very short term, but you also are so bad now you said that jumping off could be even more unbearable, oregonlady Whatever you decide, we will support you and be here for you BreeB, I can promise you that! So just stick with us

 

[[Br...]]

@[or...] i think im going to attempt to go back up to 2 mg i think my nervous system is just so upset and can’t take this huge drop in dose hopefully it can help me a bit 

[[or...]]

Ok, like I said, we are here for you whatever you decide this could work out best for you, I feel it was a blessing when I did my updose, oregonlady and for me, the left side of my body going numb was my first clue

[[Br...]]

@[or...] so your body numbness went away once you updosed after 3 days? that’s how many days it’s been for me too 

[[or...]]

No, the numbness wore off within 3 days, and that's when I could talk (make an appt) to see my doc and tell him what happended.

I just want to say that since I got a proper taper plan, slow and steady, listening to my body, and keeping records (small notepad) I have had no bad wd sxs.  I hope this make sense, but please remember, there are other here that are way more experienced than I am with tapering, and everything else to do with benzos.

Just remember also, you are a unique individual so you have to find what is best for you, oregonlady:

 

 

[[Bu...]]

5 hours ago, [[B...] said:

@[Bu...] do you mean go back up to my normal dose? or what? 

I'm sorry, @[Br...], I didn't mean to confuse you.  Yes, I wanted to move your post up so others might see it and be able to help.  @[or...] is awesome and really helpful, I'm glad she responded.

[[or...]]

19 minutes ago, [[B...] said:

I'm sorry, @[Br...], I didn't mean to confuse you.  Yes, I wanted to move your post up so others might see it and be able to help.  @[or...] is awesome and really helpful, I'm glad she responded.

no problem, I know we can't always get back to respond right away @[Bu...] I think you're pretty awesome too   

[[Br...]]

@[or...] i’m scared i haven’t really seen anyone’s stories as severe as mine in such little time 

[[bu...]]

22 minutes ago, [[B...] said:

@[or...] i’m scared i haven’t really seen anyone’s stories as severe as mine in such little time 

I took 3mg alprazolam for a month then tried CT on the 4th and 5th nights my arms and legs would jerk violently if I started to doze I thought I was going to have a seizure so I went back on at 2mg and tapered .5 every 3 days I'm down to 1mg now and feeling okay 

[[Pa...]]

7 hours ago, [[o...] said:

I know there are those way more knowledgeable than I here about Kindling as well as so much more about updosing etc.  I'll flag a couple people and see if we can get more input here for you

My understanding of kindling is it can be triggered by completely stopping and starting benzodiazepines.  Some will take the drug and then stop it, they suffer no symptoms so at some point in time, they start the drug again and stop with no problem. The next time they take it and try to stop, they get hit with symptoms and can’t understand what happened, what changed, why they can’t stop it with no problem.  This is kindling, the nervous system reaches a point of no return and these people can never go back to the drug without suffering intense symptoms and each time they do this, the symptoms get worse.  https://www.benzoinfo.com/kindling/

I don’t believe kindling refers to going back up in dose while tapering, that is simply updosing and while its not the direction we want to go in, sometimes it can help us stabilize so we an continue the process when things settle down a bit. 

[[er...]]

On 22/12/2023 at 09:01, [[B...] said:

Hello all I was wondering if anyone can relate to me I had an event occur that gave me PTSD diagnosed by my psychiatrist so I was put on a short course of ativan to be able to sleep a few nights after it happened. I started it on the 12th. 2 mg was making me sleep all night and not giving me any day time issues besides increased noise sensitivity and a bit more on edge. Well on Friday I decided to donate half a pint of blood due to my blood work being a bit off, and after that I felt really really strange all day. I tried to lay down on my couch and noticed when i closed my eyes my heart would start sinking. I tried to go out to dinner and couldn’t focus on anything or anyone I. was with and felt totally out of body. Now whenever I try to sleep it’s as if my body is afraid to go into sleep, my heart sinks, my limbs jerk, my muscles twitch, and sometimes I have full body torso jerks in the morning where it makes me jump up a bit. I also now have burning arms and tongue and akathisia very badly that I didn’t have to this extent before. I’m very agitated and angry which I also wasn’t before. I am doing a rapid taper since I haven’t been on it long and will be having my last pill on the 14th/15th day of being on them. I went down to 1.5 mg and still slept then last night I took 1 mg and didn’t sleep much and had a lot of those bad symptoms. I will be going down to .5 mg today and then .25 mg then dropping off. I am really scared. I didn’t have any of these issues before taking the benzo but I was so desperate to sleep and not have flashbacks and knew I had no plans on taking it longer than two weeks. Is this taper too fast based on my symptoms? Is it possible all these horrible things will go away once this is gone since It’s been such short time? I’m wondering if i have some type of interdose withdrawal issue. I’m so lost i’m am only 23

That's way to fast to taper...you can make things 100 times worst even if you didn't take them for a long period... please educate your self more before doing something that can destroy your healt..

[[Br...]]

@[er...] i went back up to 2 mg last night. i keep getting mixed signals people telling me to just stop since im jusy under two weeks since i seem to. have a horrible reaction and other people telling me to taper 

[[er...]]

1 minute ago, [[B...] said:

@[er...] i went back up to 2 mg last night. i keep getting mixed signals people telling me to just stop since im jusy under two weeks since i seem to. have a horrible reaction and other people telling me to taper 

I remember when I took Xanax for only a week or so... small pieces at night and stopped cold turkey and felt like I was going crazy.. I went to the ER so many times that I think they wanted to admit me in a loonie bin... this devil of a pill is so strong that it only takes 3 days for your body to start relying on it... trust me the best thing to do is take your time with the taper...