Help

[[de...]]

@[Ch...] Please try not to compare yourself to other people who are going through this process.  Everyone is different.  The fear/anxiety your are experiencing is a result of the benzo.     

[[Ch...]]

How do I make the cuts, the math. I am trying to get ready for my tapering. 

[[Pa...]]

Would it be better to wait for your friend to arrive so you can learn about this together?

This link will show you how this member did the math for his taper.  https://benzodrytapermath.com/

There are many YouTube video’s about using scales too.  

[[Ch...]]

Yes I am waiting for him. Talk to him last night he said he was not too good at math. My night sweats are so bad. What is causing it. My vision also. I have fears I don’t want to drive because of the fears and vision. 

[[Pa...]]

I didn’t taper but I’m told that once you get the hang it, it’s pretty basic, the math too. 

[[Ch...]]

On 12/09/2023 at 19:11, [[P...] said:

Since you’re in so much distress, it might be better to start your taper now, it could give you some confidence and we really need it when we’re going through this.  

Which method looks like it could work the best for you and your situation?  Just choose one and we’ll help you understand what you’ll need to do.

Dry taper. I travel sometimes not going home for weeks. I have been in Texas for 21 days. Not been outside for 21 days. I am too scared. Can I do this for extended period of time I mean getting prepared. I can’t even calculate anymore

 

[[Ch...]]

@[Pa...] is it true that tapering in tolerance is much harder?  If so I am already full symptoms what will I go through?  I have to work I am alone 56 years old. Waiting for my friend to come. I see new psychiatrist on the 5th. I not sure if he knows really what to do with benzo. I am so scared I am seeing myself homeless on a bench somewhere. I have a daughter but this is too much for her. I can’t stop crying I am so scared.  

[[Pa...]]

I’ve read it can be challenging when you’re already in tolerance but if you’re determined, which you seem to be then you’ll do whatever it takes to get off of this drug.  The only way out is through, no one has come up with a better way to do this.

I believe thinking positively can help.

[[Ch...]]

On 26/09/2023 at 17:06, [[j...] said:

@[Ch...] I was also prescribed 2mg Klonopin and I'm now almost 10 months off. Yes, it's a fairly high dose but it can be tapered and I don't think you need to fear your dose. No, this is definitely not the higest dose we've seen around here. 

@[je...] how was your taper. 

[[je...]]

It was okay. I was functional throughout. Wasn't easy but I wasn't suffering. 

[[Ch...]]

@[Pa...]my new doctor was not a good visit. He said I was too unstable that I would not make it much longer. He did not really denied my withdrawal but did not acknowledge also. He recommended that I get on Lamactil to stabilize and then start a taper. Also recommended that I split my fuses 1.5 mg at night and 0.5 during the day. He also said that my taper will be atrocious since I am at high dose and for so long. After 1 hr in his office he declined to take me as a patient. I ordered my scale last night. I don’t know what I will do to be able to live my family is in Canada my daughter is unable to cope with this. My friend be here in an about a month but I don’t think he understands what I will be going through. I don’t know if I will be homeless, how I will get out of my rental house. I am so hopeless. I need help. No one in the medical field can help me. I don’t have 45 k to taper with the famous doctor. I talked to him and tgst is the cost to taper with him. 

Edited October 6, 2023 by [Ch...]
Spelling

[[Pa...]]

@[Ch...], I’m sorry to hear you were treated so badly, but you can do this with the help of your friend as long as you have a steady supply of the medication.  

I know your fear is extreme right now but with the right tools, motivation and  supply, you can do this on your own, with our and your friends help.

 You don’t need 45K, because when it comes right down to it,  its still you who does the work, no one, not even the best experts in the world can do for you what you have to do for yourself.  Sure, they can advise, provide counseling, prescribe comfort medications but none of these things will take away the symptoms, nothing has been proven to do that.  

You can find a counselor for a lot less money than 45K, you can go to a GP or NP to get comfort medications and you can follow best tapering practices as outlined by many reputable organizations and you can get support from us.

You have options, don’t let your fear tell you otherwise. 

[[Ch...]]

I just find out that it will take at least 2 years to get disability. I am alone, have to depend on me to survive. I am scared to death. 

[[An...]]

On 13/09/2023 at 11:32, [[C...] said:

I don’t even have a compound pharmacy where I live. That would need to be called by my psychiatrist correct. He does not believe that I am in dependence. He said all in my head and he said to cut .5 mg very 10 days gave me gabapentin, Prozac, remeron, and some more. I stopped all of them after a few days because I was so sick. 

Is this the same Pdoc who is prescribing you the 2 mgs? I think you said you take the 2 mgs all at night. Why all at night in a single dose? Did you start taking Klonopin for sleep? I am not a doctor but I can tell you with almost 100% certainty that you feel so bad from the tolerance you have developed from taking the Klonopin bc I recall vividly how sick I was when I became completely tolerant to Klonopin. When you take the 2 mgs, how long after before you begin to feel bad again Chantal? What are your worst SXs? Have you ever attempted to take any other Benzo besides the Klonopin?

[[An...]]

17 hours ago, [[P...] said:

@[Ch...], I’m sorry to hear you were treated so badly, but you can do this with the help of your friend as long as you have a steady supply of the medication.  

I know your fear is extreme right now but with the right tools, motivation and  supply, you can do this on your own, with our and your friends help.

 You don’t need 45K, because when it comes right down to it,  its still you who does the work, no one, not even the best experts in the world can do for you what you have to do for yourself.  Sure, they can advise, provide counseling, prescribe comfort medications but none of these things will take away the symptoms, nothing has been proven to do that.  

You can find a counselor for a lot less money than 45K, you can go to a GP or NP to get comfort medications and you can follow best tapering practices as outlined by many reputable organizations and you can get support from us.

You have options, don’t let your fear tell you otherwise. 

Agree 100% with what Pam wrote here Chantal. We all know how sick you are and I know it feels like to you that you will never be able to get off this drug but it can be done. How much relief do you get when you take the 2 mgs of klonopin and how long does it last before you start to feel bad again? I wish somehow you could make a transition to valium but unlike the klonopin, Valium is low potency so you would probably feel horrible like I did for a while until the klonopin has been completely washed out (as was in my case) and then the valium began to slowly work.

[[...]]

Idono. I never took k before bed.

Near the end of using, I would take k to get the energy to get things done. And now that I'm off (almost a year) I am weak and get winded so easily. Total opposite. )

[[me...]]

I take 1mg k at night for tmj but it does nothing I feel terrible on it been on it ,6years I'm going to start tapering soon my gp said to just stay on it. Doctors don't understand I think they put you on benzo to sedate you so you don't bother them.they use benzos in care homes to keep the residents compliant too

Hope you feel better soon Evn

[[Ch...]]

4 hours ago, [[A...] said:

Is this the same Pdoc who is prescribing you the 2 mgs? I think you said you take the 2 mgs all at night. Why all at night in a single dose? Did you start taking Klonopin for sleep? I am not a doctor but I can tell you with almost 100% certainty that you feel so bad from the tolerance you have developed from taking the Klonopin bc I recall vividly how sick I was when I became completely tolerant to Klonopin. When you take the 2 mgs, how long after before you begin to feel bad again Chantal? What are your worst SXs? Have you ever attempted to take any other Benzo besides the Klonopin?

No was a new doctor. I know I am in tolerance. Worst symptom’s headache and blurred vision. Crying all the time, I won’t drive. Never taking any other benzo. I take at night I sleep and I get up to see what symptoms I have. New symptoms lately heartburn like crazy. 
I have an apt today at 11 am 1 hour drive I don’t know if I can do it. Very anxious all the time. 

[[Ch...]]

@[An...] I drove to my apt my check engine light came on. Stress and anxiety on interstate. I am so anxious now with headache. I received my scale @[Pa...] my friend should be here in about 4 weeks. Don’t know if I will last that long. 

[[ca...]]

I know exactly how you are feeling, I was right there early on in my taper. I was so desperate that I began employing alternative therapies in addition to experimenting with supplements & comfort meds. Everyone is different and some therapies are more effective than others so I hesitate to suggest anything other than working with the very thing that feels to be attacking you: your body. I know it's terrifying to think about, but at moments it's been the only tool I've had - tons of breathwork, screaming even, yoga, MEDITATION. All these will feel impossible at the beginning, especially in your current state. Over time, however, I've developed an internal monologue that is observant, mindful, and deep down, loving, buried within primal fear. Ironically, it took tapering off a high dose of valium for me to learn any of this. I had to find ways to slow myself down during the process as well as distract myself by ANY means possible.  Eventually small gaps in time evolved, like breathing room. I used to constantly freeze whenever attempting to do anything, especially if it meant leaving the house. The smallest trigger would stress me out beyond belief. Now, when I have that moment I am able to pause, talk to myself, observe the situation, perceive what's at the root of my anxiety, (if anything at all, sometimes it's a relief to realize it's just the damn benzos!) and simply take it. It isn't easy but the more internal work I've done, the more detached I am able to be in moments of brutal intensity. 

Someone else said, "the only way out is through." So, so, so true. It literally became my mantra once I got into the groove of my taper. 

I hope you keep trying to find a compassionate and affordable doctor - they're few and far between but do exist. And really, talking about it helps. Little by little, every distraction we indulge ourselves during this shitstorm adds up to a day....hope this helps. 

[[Ch...]]

More I read the scarier this is. I have to be functional during this taper. I have to work. I just saw a post about someone saying lost his job house etc. I am alone will I end up in a nursing home.?  Crying again because I am so scared. 

[[ca...]]

I know it sounds paradoxical but so much of the fear you are experiencing is from the benzo itself in addition to not knowing what to expect out of the taper. I'm not quite finished with my own taper but so far, the beginning was the worst because of the uncertainty and acuteness of symptoms. For me it's been a moment by moment process. Try not to think too far ahead. You've made it this far - are reaching out for help, posting. You will be ok! So many people have walked in these shoes before us. 

[[Ch...]]

I am scared. I need to support myself I am alone. Which means I have to work. I am not retired little bit a savings. Went through a nasty divorce after 38 years that left me with nothing. 

[[Ch...]]

I just found out that I need cataract surgery at 56 years old. I am not getting a break from this life at all. I am hopeless. If I can’t work I can’t have the surgery. 

[[Pa...]]

Do you need both eyes done?  I’ve been around a few people who have had it and the recovery time looks brief and people are generally happy with the outcome.