The Long Hold Support Group

[[ga...]]

hi.  don't think i know how t o  pm here.

 

Do you talk to Baylissa?  Some sort of outreach would be nice.

 

I sometimes too tense to eat (knot)  or depressed, I guess.

 

Well my change was to go up 10% but guess have to give it more than one day/night?  Kind of thought that might be etter than adding in gabapentin.  Gather that is going to be schedule V drug soon?  i guess benzos are a 4?

 

I do think you can pay for a phone consult with Baylissa. I've heard good things about her, but can't afford any of her services, so can't speak from experience. 

 

I also think it takes more than a day to feel a up-dose. Again, just what I've heard. I've only ever done a hold.

 

Please do eat and drink. Even sipping juice is better than nothing. There were days I just sipped juice. Any nutrition you can get into yourself is better than no nutrition, and liquid is an absolute necessity.

 

Gard

 

P.S. The easiest way to start to PM someone here is to click on their name or avatar. That will take you to their profile page. There will be a "send PM" link under their avatar there. If you get a message saying you can't PM the person, it probably means they have their PM's turned off.

[[Ca...]]

Barb, I think the general trend is the longer the updose is from your last cut, the longer it takes, and sometimes it affects how well it works too..

That was the case for me.. but still I noticed an improvment after a few days...

There is also a singular "Rescue Dose".. -is that what you did...??

It all becomes a personal judgment call...

You are trying hard, so hang in there, it will pay off...

 

***

Miyu, -Everyone, -Great to see you all..

Best wishes...

 

[[Ba...]]

I don't know.

 

Was at .065 of a 10 mg val, weighing 1.72 grams.  For weeks on that then .061 or 062...

for 6 days.  Last night bumped it up to like .069 or whatever...

 

am getting confused now.

Wonder if the ambien is making it worse. 

Mostly I worry adn feel trapped in this.

 

you are saying a rescue would be more than this?  Should I try?

 

Gaba i took some for a few days only, then did not take, took this updose.  Have not moved...  just stuck here.

 

[[no...]]

hi.  don't think i know how t o  pm here.

 

Do you talk to Baylissa?  Some sort of outreach would be nice.

 

I sometimes too tense to eat (knot)  or depressed, I guess.

 

Well my change was to go up 10% but guess have to give it more than one day/night?  Kind of thought that might be etter than adding in gabapentin.  Gather that is going to be schedule V drug soon?  i guess benzos are a 4?

Hi Babs  Baylissa consultations https://baylissa.com/consult-appointments/

 

 

 

Love Nova xxx :smitten:

[[Ca...]]

I don't know.

 

Was at .065 of a 10 mg val, weighing 1.72 grams.  For weeks on that then .061 or 062...

for 6 days.  Last night bumped it up to like .069 or whatever...

 

am getting confused now.

Wonder if the ambien is making it worse. 

Mostly I worry adn feel trapped in this.

 

you are saying a rescue would be more than this?  Should I try?

 

Gaba i took some for a few days only, then did not take, took this updose.  Have not moved...  just stuck here.

Are you still on the 0.05 klon?

It looks like you have tapered a lot this year.. But im not sure im reading your sig right... and what your numbers all mean...

People often suggest going back to the last stable dose, but that depends on the situation...

A good reacue dose might give you ideas or info..?

A rescue dose for me would be say, from 1v and struggling to taking a single 2v dose... and if that went well, I might then settle at 1.25v or even 1.5v...

But obviously I wouldnt go from say 10v to 20v...

But what suits me may not suit you... Stability is very important, so pls try not to jump around on doses or meds if you can help it... Holding us by far preferable, if tolerable, Imho..

If things are too hard though, Dose correction becomes a possible solution...

Cheers...

 

 

[[bl...]]

Miyu: thanks for shout out. It does mean something. Not sure why exactly but always nice to be remembered when we’re feeling so isolated from normality.

 

Barb: I Updosed to 3 after too big a cut and it didn’t help me personally, but I did find holding post cut, however long it took, does help. That said, everyone is different. It’s worth a try if u r truly suffering. I know I was expecting a relief that didn’t come, and then that freaked me out, but after the long hold things evened out for a while. Hope you have a better tomorrow.

[[Ba...]]

No, I am not on klonopin.

 

Looking back wish had stayed on it and just gone off that but seemed stuck on like 1/4 of a .5 pill.  So went to valium.

 

Have I come off a lot??  I wasn't on that much to begin with.  Think I was on 5 mg to start with, and was not taking ambien regularly.  But was, erratically. 

 

Not sure what you are saying about my dosage, but get that not jumping around makes sense.    I don't think I've accomplished much at all-- just gone sideways...?

[[Ba...]]

I have trouble figuring out the .sigs as well.

 

The deal is I cut down klon, no problem, until I added 6 weeks low dose mirtazapine.  Then incredible, horrible withdrawal.  Actually was sick on it, then I went off and was totally a mess-- bedridden, horrible gi issues, thought was losing my vision, everything.

 

So adding an AD is not going to happen.

 

So this one dr said add gabapentin.  I know I can take it and lyrica.  How long they would work is another story... right?

 

Ye I am in despair.

 

>>It does mean something. Not sure why exactly but always nice to be remembered when we’re feeling so isolated from normality. <<

 

Yes, Blue, I agree.  I wish I could use these boards more easily.  I have big probs with them.  Well, with everything, I guess.

 

sigh.

[[He...]]

Heath here ... checking in... sorry it’s been a while....

 

Still holding and feeling pretty good.  No complaints.  Muscle pain in arm still comes and goes but less intensity. I think that part of my brain that controls muscles must be going through some kind of healing process and trying to reach homeostasis. That’s the only way to keep myself sane. Chalk it up to a good reason.

 

Ive been reading when I can. Sorry I haven’t chimed in much. The advice I read posted from other buddies here is so spot on I can’t really add very much.

 

School is putting so many demands on me lately for next years class. I have a difficult time saying no, even though I would be over extending myself. This time I did it again, but I have let the admin know that I am going to have to bow out of what they kind of talked me into! I should have said noto begin with.  One day I am going to learn to stand my ground and say no to the requests that I really do not want to do.

Well maybe in my next life if not this one. ..if there is another one?????

 

I hope everyone who is suffering still, will find that magic window soon. It’s so hard to have patience and hope and pray that tomorrow will be the breakthrough day.....but we all know that  it WILL happen! Feel better everyone.

 

Heath

[[St...]]

Nice to have you back Heath and glad everything is settling for you.l think saying no is very difficult however as l age l find the more l do it the easier it gets.lt just takes practice.

    Love Stut X

[[St...]]

Hi Miyu lovely to have you back as well.Sorry you are still suffering l would imagine the change in generics is still taking it's toll.l hope it settles down for you.

      Love Stut X

[[St...]]

Barbara l can only imagine what you are going through l wish l could help you however my only advice would be to either slightly updose and hold or hold at the dose you are on.When l say hold l am talking several months not weeks.

      Love Stut X

[[Ca...]]

I have trouble figuring out the .sigs as well.

 

The deal is I cut down klon, no problem, until I added 6 weeks low dose mirtazapine.  Then incredible, horrible withdrawal.  Actually was sick on it, then I went off and was totally a mess-- bedridden, horrible gi issues, thought was losing my vision, everything.

 

So adding an AD is not going to happen.

 

So this one dr said add gabapentin.  I know I can take it and lyrica.  How long they would work is another story... right?

 

Ye I am in despair.

 

>>It does mean something. Not sure why exactly but always nice to be remembered when we’re feeling so isolated from normality. <<

 

Yes, Blue, I agree.  I wish I could use these boards more easily.  I have big probs with them.  Well, with everything, I guess.

 

sigh.

Ok, I think I follow...

just the pill weight numbers or fractions threw me a bit...

 

I know 5v is a solid dose, as I saw what it did for violent uncontrollable muscle spasms I had in the ER... -and thats where I started my taper from... But lets not focus on that... It is what it is... 5, 4, 0.25v -WD is WD...

It may be more that this is more a medicine reaction thing, or extreme sensitivity to a cmedicine combination.. -You wouldnt be on your own with this...

Even if its just from removing meds too fast your choices probably remain the same...

Hold, or pick a med and aim for possible relief...

 

What is your actual Valium dosage now in medicine mg?? If its 0.069? Then thats tiny -like 1/4 of my dose... This is where im confused.. (not your fault)

 

 

 

[[St...]]

Hi Scardie l have been reading a few threads and l am going to say this please don't take any curt replies to your questions to heart.l know you have depression so l know how vulnerable you feel so please try to let it pass over you.Gard and other teachers will keep you right.l hope you have a better day.

  Love Stut X

 

[[St...]]

Hi Cant how are you?

  Love Stut X

[[Ca...]]

Hi Stut..

Hope you are well today..??

 

All ok this end... Bit worn out from bouncing around in the bush in the car...

and the normal stuff...

Cant complain... -Today..

 

Take care...

 

 

[[St...]]

Begood,Gard, Mary, Bluepill,TMB, Greencup, Nova and everyone here l hope Sunday treats you well.

    Love Stut X

[[St...]]

Good Cant l have been a bit teary this last few days it seems to have hit home that my daughter will be out of here this time next week.Even the fact that l can cry is a sign l am improving as a couple of years ago l couldn't so every cloud as they say.Have a restful evening.

    Love Stut X

[[Ca...]]

Good Cant l have been a bit teary this last few days it seems to have hit home that my daughter will be out of here this time next week.Even the fact that l can cry is a sign l am improving as a couple of years ago l couldn't so every cloud as they say.Have a restful evening.

    Love Stut X

New chapters for both of you...!!

Go with the emotions, yes they are real, and such a good healthy thing...

It will all come together, never the same, but a fresh and evolving new relationship, with the sky as the limit...!! (Get back to me on it when C15 leaves home...)

 

[[St...]]

Haha Cant hang on by your finger nails and get plenty of tissues that's my experience so far.

    Love Stut X

[[be...]]

Good Cant l have been a bit teary this last few days it seems to have hit home that my daughter will be out of here this time next week.Even the fact that l can cry is a sign l am improving as a couple of years ago l couldn't so every cloud as they say.Have a restful evening.

    Love Stut X

Morning Stut, gosh the time went fast, I can feel your pain, not from a Mothers perspective, but other people that have come into my life and had to leave....oh parting is so hard, but we do what we must to let our Loved ones acquire their wings, those wings that will take her away from you, will also return her to you, she will grow and become the woman you have guided all these years. We will be here for you and know that you are not alone. I know that Cant is facing this also, but they may leave to conquer the world, but they are forever in your heart. Stay Strong, Stand Tall. 💖 Peace and Healing Hugs.

[[no...]]

thank you TMB ..... How are you holding up?

 

I do want to mention everyone by name , cause I know when someone remembers me, it matters

 

So thinking of you -

Nova, Stut,  BG, Mary,  Olive , Heath , Cant, Barbara, NJ, SC, ( that's you Scardie  ) , SS, LAura, BlueP, Greencup, TNTD  GArd, Valley, Esperanza ( welcome),  .

Have I missed anyone ? THinking of you too if so.

 

Where's ATU I wonder ?

 

Hugs ,

MiYu

Hi M  xxxxx :smitten:

[[Ba...]]

Cant...

 

>>dose... and if that went well, I might then settle at 1.25v or even 1.5v...

But obviously I wouldnt go from say 10v to 20v...<<

 

You are at .25 mg now??  Or you are saying if you were at 1 you'd maybe go up to 1.25 or 1.5?

 

See if I go up much, I'm back to where the last year and a half were meaningless.  Well, am off the 6 weeks of mirtaz, but would be back on equiv. of valium at 5 mg which was equiv of my klonopin dose. 

 

 

If I was at 5 mg valium then,  and was down to 3.82mg, recently, by my calculation  (plus keep in mind this is plus a 10 ambien-- ambien has become regular as I've gone own on valium, which is self defeating)... and my 10% up made it 4.01 mg valium,  well, what the heck am I doing?

 

I will say have taken some lyrica or gabapentin-- a small dose (say 1/3 to 1/2 of a 75 mg cap lyrica, or, well, maybe 200 mg gabapentin, approx)... get hangover but feel some relief.  BUT know it won't last (none of these things ever last, do they...) and then if do not take feel worse.  So maybe that stuff is quickly addicting.

 

I am the walking dead here; or not walking...lying.  Plus my tooth hurting again and tooth looked fine on xray and been ok, mostly since then.  So it my damn CNS system.  Bet if take gabapentin it feel ok ( right now feels odd and hot and bit sore now, the one that was worked on with the temporary crown to recap... hehe... 'recap' .

 

I always feel better at night (circadian rhythm is reversed)... or is it that is the longest from having taken meds? 

 

After decades and decades of this guess my brain is fried.  And no, this is no quality of lifel.  And there is nothing but more suffering ahead?  I don't know how you all hang in.  I guess you have family and stuff.  And found out my friends... aren't.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[[Ba...]]

I mean I have sporadically taken the Lyrica (not recently) or gabapetin (several nights ago).

 

Have to figure what the heck to take tonight.  I have my choice of crap medication.

 

??

 

Also someone mentioned somewhere Unisom you should not take?  Is that true?  Always hoping for alternatives...

[[Ba...]]

PS.  I think recently have noticed when I take my valium I feel kind of a little headache (back of head) when I take.  Or sometimes notice vibrations... tho these can come and go. 

Would these be indications to definitely not up Valium?

 

When I took the Remeron (mirtazapine) which set off this whole cascade, I am guessing, I almost instantly felt side effects.  I don't even know how you could get effects that quickly, frankly.  Staying on 6 wks was an effort-- I thought was giving it a real trial.  Obviously I made a bad move there.

 

OK, thank you all very much!