The Long Hold Support Group

[[Su...]]

Kk the best thread on this site in my opinion.You also could be suffering from a withdrawal symptom which l have a lot of difficulty with and that is obsessive thinking.l am obsessed by this taper.l definitely find it very frustrating.lt is easing off a bit but still there sadly.

 

Oh, most definitely I am!  It males me crazy.  I check in on my feelings constantly, and then check this site.  When it settles down, I don't even pick up my phone.  I just live.  Good to k is it's not me, it's this drug.  Sometimes I feel like I'm stuck like this.

Oh the obsession with this tapering stuff is horrendous!  Like a back drop to all my thinking......looping and whirling "what if i....." Crazy making!

Another reason for a long hold! (for me) 

 

 

[[St...]]

Too true all think about it the moment l open my eyes and on and on it goes.Cant just play around with it l probably will try a liquid taper if l ever get down that low.You are nearly there.

[[He...]]

Hi All,

 

I'm still waiting to stabilize from my hold.  I thought I would hold klonopin and start tapering my migraine med (which is an AD).  I made the reduction a while ago, but I'm still fighting this crazy anxiety.  I have had a few days that things seemed OK anxiety-wise, but the last few days it's been pretty high.  I'm taking nortriptyline which is an antidepressant that also helps anxiety so I can only thing that my 20% decrease caused my body to go crazy trying to even things out. 

 

I'm really looking forward to getting to a place where my symptoms are in a good place.  Of course I keep getting thoughts like "Maybe the 20mg I'm taking is what's causing this anxiety and it will never get better", but rationally, I did OK on 10mg and 25mg when I increased, so a 20mg dose should be OK. 

 

I also started thinking that maybe it's from the reduction in klonopin, but it was a while ago.  I know that I'm going to stay on the same dose of these meds for a few months, but every day just seems so long!  I feel like I can deal with the physical symptoms, but I haven't experienced anxiety or panic before December 2017 and I'm finding it hard to cope.

[[Ch...]]

Hi All,

 

I'm still waiting to stabilize from my hold.  I thought I would hold klonopin and start tapering my migraine med (which is an AD).  I made the reduction a while ago, but I'm still fighting this crazy anxiety.  I have had a few days that things seemed OK anxiety-wise, but the last few days it's been pretty high.  I'm taking nortriptyline which is an antidepressant that also helps anxiety so I can only thing that my 20% decrease caused my body to go crazy trying to even things out. 

 

I'm really looking forward to getting to a place where my symptoms are in a good place.  Of course I keep getting thoughts like "Maybe the 20mg I'm taking is what's causing this anxiety and it will never get better", but rationally, I did OK on 10mg and 25mg when I increased, so a 20mg dose should be OK. 

 

I also started thinking that maybe it's from the reduction in klonopin, but it was a while ago.  I know that I'm going to stay on the same dose of these meds for a few months, but every day just seems so long!  I feel like I can deal with the physical symptoms, but I haven't experienced anxiety or panic before December 2017 and I'm finding it hard to cope.

 

Heather, I'm in the same.boat.  My anxiety hit me.out of the blue in October, so my Dr threw meds at me.  I've been screwed up.evee since.  Now I'm trying to stabilize on my Xanax dose so I can keep cutting. 

 

I'd be happy just getting to where I have zero anxiety, then holding off a bit. 

 

KK

[[Ca...]]

 

For Valley um, who has done so much for us all here...

Whose wise words helped me navigate the effects of two horrid meds..

Thank you...

 

Also thank you to everyone contributing and supporting.. a long list indeed... -nearly as long as the famous "Propaganda list"...

 

 

[[Ca...]]

Hi All,

 

I'm still waiting to stabilize from my hold.  I thought I would hold klonopin and start tapering my migraine med (which is an AD).  I made the reduction a while ago, but I'm still fighting this crazy anxiety.  I have had a few days that things seemed OK anxiety-wise, but the last few days it's been pretty high.  I'm taking nortriptyline which is an antidepressant that also helps anxiety so I can only thing that my 20% decrease caused my body to go crazy trying to even things out. 

 

I'm really looking forward to getting to a place where my symptoms are in a good place.  Of course I keep getting thoughts like "Maybe the 20mg I'm taking is what's causing this anxiety and it will never get better", but rationally, I did OK on 10mg and 25mg when I increased, so a 20mg dose should be OK. 

 

I also started thinking that maybe it's from the reduction in klonopin, but it was a while ago.  I know that I'm going to stay on the same dose of these meds for a few months, but every day just seems so long!  I feel like I can deal with the physical symptoms, but I haven't experienced anxiety or panic before December 2017 and I'm finding it hard to cope.

 

Heather, I'm in the same.boat.  My anxiety hit me.out of the blue in October, so my Dr threw meds at me.  I've been screwed up.evee since.  Now I'm trying to stabilize on my Xanax dose so I can keep cutting. 

 

I'd be happy just getting to where I have zero anxiety, then holding off a bit. 

 

KK

Hi Heather, 

As my valium was for muscle relaxation essentially, I had never experienced them either... I got a rude shock, but it was a good learning curb, in hind sight... i hope i have seen the last of it..!!

It faded away as my body caught up... Now its mainly that my senses are extra sensitive, and my bidy clock is out..!!

It does all get bearable, if not rushed...

 

Night all...

B well..

 

[[St...]]

Hi Heather try not to think too far into the future.l know that anxiety and panic attacks are terrifying when they begin however the withdrawal symptoms are a lot more severe and you feel completely lost when they hit.l have lived with chronic anxiety and as much as I hate it l can deal with it most of the time.This withdrawal anxiety etc is totally in a different league.l believe this is because your ability to cope is compromised and your hit with so many symptoms as well.l just want to get off these drugs and live the best life that l can.

[[He...]]

Thanks for the reply and encouragement!

 

I used to give presentations for work quite often and ran meetings all day long as a program manager.  I would get that butterflies feeling in my stomach if I had to talk in a large group of people, but I’ve never experienced anything like this.

[[Ch...]]

I feel the same...thisndrug induced anxiety is horrendous.  I keep trying to tell my husband that it's different than just being anxious, he tells me to try my coping skills.  Coping skills don't work when it's that bad.  I'm sorry.  No amount of chamomile tea is going to calm me when I wake up shaking.

[[St...]]

I think the only thing to do when hit with this type of anxiety is police your thoughts try not to increase it.Also scream into a pillow and ride the storm and know it is not for ever.Keep fighting this is temporary always remember that.

[[Ch...]]

I think the only thing to do when hit with this type of anxiety is police your thoughts try not to increase it.Also scream into a pillow and ride the storm and know it is not for ever.Keep fighting this is temporary always remember that.

 

That's where I go wrong.  I get so deep that I can't see a way out and think I'm going to be like this forever.  Today, I'm so-so. Like I'm teetering on the edge of shaking.  I'm so tense.

[[NJ...]]

I think the only thing to do when hit with this type of anxiety is police your thoughts try not to increase it.Also scream into a pillow and ride the storm and know it is not for ever.Keep fighting this is temporary always remember that.

 

That's where I go wrong.  I get so deep that I can't see a way out and think I'm going to be like this forever.  Today, I'm so-so. Like I'm teetering on the edge of shaking.  I'm so tense.

 

Same here. I cried my whole way to work. I had a big presentation at work today. I have not eaten. I have only had about four ounces to drink.  And an evening meeting until 11 p.m. tonight. I am not sure how I am going to make it through. Also barely slept last night. Tomorrow I go for the test to screen my gall bladder--I really hope that all this nausea, diarrhea and loss of appetite is just not tapering--I have not cut dose in more than a month so have been holding and getting worse. I have been at this for two years and never been this sick before. I know I am starting a new job but changing jobs has never sent me into such a tailspin before. And I am getting in that place now where I do feel like this will be forever. I know it's a benzo lie, but it totally sucks anyway.

 

 

 

 

[[Ch...]]

I think the only thing to do when hit with this type of anxiety is police your thoughts try not to increase it.Also scream into a pillow and ride the storm and know it is not for ever.Keep fighting this is temporary always remember that.

 

That's where I go wrong.  I get so deep that I can't see a way out and think I'm going to be like this forever.  Today, I'm so-so. Like I'm teetering on the edge of shaking.  I'm so tense.

 

Same here. I cried my whole way to work. I had a big presentation at work today. I have not eaten. I have only had about four ounces to drink.  And an evening meeting until 11 p.m. tonight. I am not sure how I am going to make it through. Also barely slept last night. Tomorrow I go for the test to screen my gall bladder--I really hope that all this nausea, diarrhea and loss of appetite is just not tapering--I have not cut dose in more than a month so have been holding and getting worse. I have been at this for two years and never been this sick before. I know I am starting a new job but changing jobs has never sent me into such a tailspin before. And I am getting in that place now where I do feel like this will be forever. I know it's a benzo lie, but it totally sucks anyway.

 

Hang in there, NJ.  It's all a benzo lie, right?  Isn't that what you'd tell me??  Just get thru today, and worry about tomorrow when it comes.  One day, one hour, one minute at a time. 

[[St...]]

You both are working through this process which is something you should be very proud of.Lots of people are sitting in their house hiding from the world so you should be very proud of yourselves.l admire you both.

  NJ let us know how your tests go l hope they get to the bottom of your nausea problem.

[[Ch...]]

Thank you Stut.  Believe me, it's not always easy. I probably spend more time on here than I do on my work right now, but that changes as my sxs subside.  One of my biggest fears is that i will get so bad that I can't work, I lose my job, or I end up in a psych ward.  When Im really bad, I sob just thinking about it all.

And yes, NJ, please be sure and keep us posted on your test results.  I think.some of us are more affected physically than others she it comes to anxiety.  I get so nauseas I almost vomit just brushing my teeth!

[[St...]]

KK you won't end up on a psych ward or we would all be in trust me.You are going to be fine.It is temporary and you will get through this practice breathing techniques and if you get a chance go out for a brisk walk.lt does help with tension.

[[Ch...]]

KK you won't end up on a psych ward or we would all be in trust me.You are going to be fine.It is temporary and you will get through this practice breathing techniques and if you get a chance go out for a brisk walk.lt does help with tension.

 

It's raining today here in sunny Southern California, so no walk for me.  I do have yoga and/or meditation class tonight.  Not sure which I'm going to yet.  Probably yoga, cuz it's right after work.  Meditation is at 7:45 (yikes).  Once I'm home, I don't go back out.

 

I need to stop reading the worst of the worst BB stories, don't I? 

[[NJ...]]

I do think the working, as hard as it is, helps most of the time. And realistically, I have to work,  I took time off when my kids were young and only started full time work 5 years ago, so if I am ever going to retire (and pay 7 more years of college tuition), really no choice. Thanks everyone as always for their support.

[[St...]]

Oh KK don't be reading them l don't read any off them.Just read positive things don't scare yourself as you are very susceptible to suggestion at the moment.Go to the Yoga and try to clear your mind.

[[Ch...]]

Oh KK don't be reading them l don't read any off them.Just read positive things don't scare yourself as you are very susceptible to suggestion at the moment.Go to the Yoga and try to clear your mind.

 

I try not to, but I find myself looking for answers to all of this, and there they are.  This board is my lifeline though.  I'm so thankful to have found all of you!

 

Now, to force myself to eat lunch.  Hmmmm. What sounds good?  NOTHING

[[St...]]

If you aren't eating try to drink plenty.Keep strong you will get through this.

[[Ch...]]

Wow, not feeling well at all suddenly.  Woozy, dizzy, spacey....what is this??  This is new.  And scaring me.  Great.

[[Su...]]

KK you won't end up on a psych ward or we would all be in trust me.You are going to be fine.It is temporary and you will get through this practice breathing techniques and if you get a chance go out for a brisk walk.lt does help with tension.

 

It's raining today here in sunny Southern California, so no walk for me.  I do have yoga and/or meditation class tonight.  Not sure which I'm going to yet.  Probably yoga, cuz it's right after work.  Meditation is at 7:45 (yikes).  Once I'm home, I don't go back out.

 

I need to stop reading the worst of the worst BB stories, don't I? 

 

Yes! yes! stop reading the worst stories!  Scared the bejesus out of me when I first started this whole thing... which made me want to speed  up ...which made my sxs worse and then I was on the hamster wheel.

There is a long slow taper which can minimize sxs and allow for life.... including some long holds into the mix!

I agree the chemical anxiety is a different animal than "regular"  anxiety... but I've gotten to know it better in the last year, really all I can think to do with it...

Now to get stable again, which I had basically been for most of my taper and hold.....

Life does go on!

SS

[[Su...]]

Wow, not feeling well at all suddenly.  Woozy, dizzy, spacey....what is this??  This is new.  And scaring me.  Great.

Low blood sugar? 

[[Ch...]]

KK you won't end up on a psych ward or we would all be in trust me.You are going to be fine.It is temporary and you will get through this practice breathing techniques and if you get a chance go out for a brisk walk.lt does help with tension.

 

It's raining today here in sunny Southern California, so no walk for me.  I do have yoga and/or meditation class tonight.  Not sure which I'm going to yet.  Probably yoga, cuz it's right after work.  Meditation is at 7:45 (yikes).  Once I'm home, I don't go back out.

 

I need to stop reading the worst of the worst BB stories, don't I? 

 

Yes! yes! stop reading the worst stories!  Scared the bejesus out of me when I first started this whole thing... which made me want to speed  up ...which made my sxs worse and then I was on the hamster wheel.

There is a long slow taper which can minimize sxs and allow for life.... including some long holds into the mix!

I agree the chemical anxiety is a different animal than "regular"  anxiety... but I've gotten to know it better in the last year, really all I can think to do with it...

Now to get stable again, which I had basically been for most of my taper and hold.....

Life does go on!

SS

 

Some new weird sxs just hit me and now I'm shaking.  See my post above.  Almost thinking of going home, but I can't.