The Long Hold Support Group

[Guest [Bu...]]

Happy Thanksgiving long holders!! ...  When I started this process I never imagined I'd still be tapering at the end of 2017.  Now I know that I will be tapering for a very long time...  I'm am thankful for all of you that support this idea of of going very, very slowly to get off benzos when needed.  For me it is the way to go. 

 

I hear you!  I started tapering last December from only .25 mg xanax. Gave myself a "conservative" 3 months to taper.        Still tapering. I have to remain functional for work so I am taking the slow approach also.

thank you so happy to be here  now to  restart my unfinished  journey beating this Benzo once and for all lol kind regards. Derek

[[He...]]

Hi Buddie 56, Derek, and WELCOME!

Sorry I’m such a late responder. Thanksgiving clean-up etc!

I’m a long holder too and a very slow turtle goer. Went from 7.5 mg Valium to 1.2 mg in about 7 mos. Way tooo fast. Crashed! Did a Long hold for 4 mos and got me back on track.

 

When I got to 1 mg Iswitched to daily micro taper with incorporated holds when I felt some wdsx ramping up. But have had very little wdfx since committing to really slow taper with tiny cuts.

 

Now....Doing reduction of 5% a month with some holds. Doing quite well. Very functional, able to work.

So holds and slow taper are definitely the way to go for me.i figure anwhere from another year to Maybe 15 months should do it for me, but really not counting. It will happen when it happens, my walkoff  I mean. ANd Ireally do expect to walk off with ease since I am going soooo slow and giving my brain the time to adjust to the downsizing in dose as I go along, like a turtle!

 

So welcome and IMO, the long hold group is the way to go!

 

Oh also forgot to mention the buddies on this group are THEEE BEST! Supportive, kind, knowledgeable, patient, forgiving, never scolding, just helpful and encouraging.... and just about there for everyone just about all the time. Rarely does a day go by that no one is here to ask or answer questions and help out. Really a great place!

 

Heath :thumbsup: :thumbsup:

 

[[Va...]]

Hi,Oscar, hope you don't mind my replying to your post ? i see you been on Valium for a very long time. its wicked stuff to kick yeah, but you doing great, i am trying to taper slowly i read your post and you gave me hope at last lol couple of weeks ago i had a bad rebound after kicking 5mg Valium i was clean for just over 6 months then all hell broke loose lol had extreme panic attacks that lasted hours seemed like forever, anxiety no sleep bad tinnitus i thought i was gonna die, this was my worst episode by far ! i did not want to  reinstate Valium what so ever, but i needed to get myself together sooo reluctantly i decided to reinstate 5mg Valium once daily for 1 week , god within the hour all my anxiety panic attacks disappeared apart from my tinnitus which is still bad i slept sound that week best sleep i had had in over 12 months lol, anyways i have now started tapering i am trying 5% Valium daily for 2 weeks see how i go, then go from there ? i would be real great full for any help given, from any one of you kind folks  stay safe everyone, Derek. 

Hi Buddie. We’re glad you’re here! I think most here will agree the slow approach works best.  Always listen to what your body is telling you  and slow down if sxs ramp up and you’ll do just great!  —V

[[an...]]

Hi Buddie56,

 

You are in the right place.  Slow does  work.  I also tapered too fast in the beginning.  There have been a couple of up doses and many holds, but I am finally in a place where I can taper slowly and still remain functional.  It will take me another year to get off this small amount, but that is fine with me.  Good luck with your taper.  As long as you listen to your body, you will be fine.

 

Anne :thumbsup:

[[He...]]

I have a question.

I was so tired last night I forgot to take my Valium dose. It’s about 3 mg. 3/4 of a 5 mg pill.  I take it once a day....

 

What should I do...?...

[[no...]]

I have a question.

I was so tired last night I forgot to take my Valium dose. It’s about 3 mg. 3/4 of a 5 mg pill.  I take it once a day....

 

What should I do...?...

  Hi HS  Take it now, whenever you miss a dose either take it as soon as you notice or if you dose more than once you can add it to which ever dose in the day or night you prefer, it has to be taken otherwise you'll have withdrawal  symptoms creep up on you from the missed dose. It may not show right away and actually take a few weeks before you actually get any symptoms due to the long half life of Valium/ Diazepam, so don't worry you won't have created a problem by taking it hours or a day or so later. I've done it myself plenty of times 

 

Love Nova XXX  :smitten:

[[Va...]]

I have a question.

I was so tired last night I forgot to take my Valium dose. It’s about 3 mg. 3/4 of a 5 mg pill.  I take it once a day....

 

What should I do...?...

  Hi HS  Take it now, whenever you miss a dose either take it as soon as you notice or if you dose more than once you can add it to which ever dose in the day or night you prefer, it has to be taken otherwise you'll have withdrawal  symptoms creep up on you from the missed dose. It may not show right away and actually take a few weeks before you actually get any symptoms due to the long half life of Valium/ Diazepam, so don't worry you won't have created a problem by taking it hours or a day or so later. I've done it myself plenty of times 

 

Love Nova XXX  :smitten:

[[bl...]]

Hi Everyone;

I haven't been here in a while. I am freaking out and was wondering if anyone could help. My main s/x since taper has been sore hands and feet. I had blood work done in 2016 which was fine. Last week I had another panel run and my ANA was very high. I am now terrified that I do in fact have an auto immune disease. Dose anyone have any experience with this? I know that the drugs can lead to false positives but.....

Thanks for listening,

Blue

[Guest [Bu...]]

Hi Buddie 56, Derek, and WELCOME!

Sorry I’m such a late responder. Thanksgiving clean-up etc!

I’m a long holder too and a very slow turtle goer. Went from 7.5 mg Valium to 1.2 mg in about 7 mos. Way tooo fast. Crashed! Did a Long hold for 4 mos and got me back on track.

 

When I got to 1 mg Iswitched to daily micro taper with incorporated holds when I felt some wdsx ramping up. But have had very little wdfx since committing to really slow taper with tiny cuts.

 

Now....Doing reduction of 5% a month with some holds. Doing quite well. Very functional, able to work.

So holds and slow taper are definitely the way to go for me.i figure anwhere from another year to Maybe 15 months should do it for me, but really not counting. It will happen when it happens, my walkoff  I mean. ANd Ireally do expect to walk off with ease since I am going soooo slow and giving my brain the time to adjust to the downsizing in dose as I go along, like a turtle!

 

So welcome and IMO, the long hold group is the way to go!

 

Oh also forgot to mention the buddies on this group are THEEE BEST! Supportive, kind, knowledgeable, patient, forgiving, never scolding, just helpful and encouraging.... and just about there for everyone just about all the time. Rarely does a day go by that no one is here to ask or answer questions and help out. Really a great place!

 

Heath :thumbsup: :thumbsup:

Hi,folks thank you so much for welcoming me to group, its great to be here, i read your real life journey's and you give me comfort to know that with your inspiration i can and i WILL beat this Valium in time, i know i WILL get my life back again. bless you all. 

[[...]]

Hi Everyone;

I haven't been here in a while. I am freaking out and was wondering if anyone could help. My main s/x since taper has been sore hands and feet. I had blood work done in 2016 which was fine. Last week I had another panel run and my ANA was very high. I am now terrified that I do in fact have an auto immune disease. Dose anyone have any experience with this? I know that the drugs can lead to false positives but.....

Thanks for listening,

Blue

 

Hi Blue.... I'm sorry I don't have any experience with this. All I can say is try not to worry if you don't have any definitive tests proving autoimmune issue, Also , AI issues can be managed too, often with diet. Will you be getting other tests done? I think you struggle with health issues from what I recall? Hang in there and try not to worry , it wont help... relax and breath as much as you can,

love, Miyu

[[...]]

hi everyone,

 

First , welcome any new members to this great group of buddies.

 

Valley , I'm so sorry about your chicken , how sad :'( I'm glad you were there for her though.

 

I hope everyone else is doing well, or managing if not.

 

Me, I'm the same , still not well, my body just seems to have decided it doesn't like benzos, ( Not sure it ever really did)

I don't know , I just feel pretty lousy all the time , and especially after dosing. If I didn't feel so horrible I wouldn't be in such a quandry about holding. But i'm afraid it's the same old story , at least as far as the side effects go.

 

I will say however , that I do feel some small improvements in my withdrawal type symptoms. I still can rarely get out or see anyone due to stress intolerance, But my physical symptoms aren't as intense as they were, so I'm grateful for that. every day is different too! One day I can feel absolutely horrible , and then another day is better. Hard to imagine that after all this time my body is still trying to stabilize, but then , there was the K switch so maybe that's a part of it.

 

And if I am getting Valium withdrawals , they can last a long time....who knows?

I just have to trust that one day I'll make it off and find some health again.

 

love to everyone, 

Miyu :smitten:

 

I think about Cant and wonder what ever has happened to him.....

 

[[bl...]]

Miyu;

Thanks for responding. I appreciate it. No, no other health issues---well, maybe--! I was chalking it up to Benzos-- all the stiffness in feet and hands and vision stuff but maybe it's something more.  :'( Anyway, I guess I will figure it out--or not. I get so stressed about health stuff and the positive marker being so high (after it was all fine last year) sent me through the roof. Time will tell I guess. I am SO glad to hear u r doing better. So pleased for you and am always grateful for your kind words. Means a lot.

Blue

[[Va...]]

Miyu;

Thanks for responding. I appreciate it. No, no other health issues---well, maybe--! I was chalking it up to Benzos-- all the stiffness in feet and hands and vision stuff but maybe it's something more.  :'( Anyway, I guess I will figure it out--or not. I get so stressed about health stuff and the positive marker being so high (after it was all fine last year) sent me through the roof. Time will tell I guess. I am SO glad to hear u r doing better. So pleased for you and am always grateful for your kind words. Means a lot.

Blue

Hi bluepill.  I get really stiff feet but don’t say much about them because I always forget about it lol.  My feet feel like they are having spasms especially in the bottoms.  Although it doesn’t slow me down, it can be pretty painful at times.  The only thing I have found that helps any is to soak my feet.  No problems with the hands though.  I hope you get past it.  —V

[[Va...]]

hi everyone,

 

First , welcome any new members to this great group of buddies.

 

Valley , I'm so sorry about your chicken , how sad :'( I'm glad you were there for her though.

 

I hope everyone else is doing well, or managing if not.

 

Me, I'm the same , still not well, my body just seems to have decided it doesn't like benzos, ( Not sure it ever really did)

I don't know , I just feel pretty lousy all the time , and especially after dosing. If I didn't feel so horrible I wouldn't be in such a quandry about holding. But i'm afraid it's the same old story , at least as far as the side effects go.

 

I will say however , that I do feel some small improvements in my withdrawal type symptoms. I still can rarely get out or see anyone due to stress intolerance, But my physical symptoms aren't as intense as they were, so I'm grateful for that. every day is different too! One day I can feel absolutely horrible , and then another day is better. Hard to imagine that after all this time my body is still trying to stabilize, but then , there was the K switch so maybe that's a part of it.

 

And if I am getting Valium withdrawals , they can last a long time....who knows?

I just have to trust that one day I'll make it off and find some health again.

 

love to everyone, 

Miyu :smitten:

 

I think about Cant and wonder what ever has happened to him.....

Hi MiYu.  I’m so sorry you’re still having a rough go of it.  Hopefully everything will settle and even out for you.  I’m sure you’ll be off and healthy again.

 

I often wonder about cant as well...

[[bl...]]

Thanks, Valley. So relieved to find you all still here--well, for me--I guess it's maybe not good for you?? I agree re pain--I am ok w/ the pain if I know it's w/d but a high ANA sounds very scary and opens another can of worms. And then the panic begins.....

Anyway, your kind words and thoughts very much appreciated...

[[He...]]

So two nights ago I forgot to take my bedtime dose of Valium. 3.75 mg.

I took 1/4 yesterday morning 1/4 yesterday afternoon and 1/4 this morning. I also take Ativan throughout the day....today I feel drugged and anxious and awful....did I do the wrong thing.

 

How long will it take me to balance out.  I feel like an idiot

HS

[[ba...]]

hi everyone,

 

First , welcome any new members to this great group of buddies.

 

Valley , I'm so sorry about your chicken , how sad :'( I'm glad you were there for her though.

 

I hope everyone else is doing well, or managing if not.

 

Me, I'm the same , still not well, my body just seems to have decided it doesn't like benzos, ( Not sure it ever really did)

I don't know , I just feel pretty lousy all the time , and especially after dosing. If I didn't feel so horrible I wouldn't be in such a quandry about holding. But I'm afraid it's the same old story , at least as far as the side effects go.

 

I will say however , that I do feel some small improvements in my withdrawal type symptoms. I still can rarely get out or see anyone due to stress intolerance, But my physical symptoms aren't as intense as they were, so I'm grateful for that. every day is different too! One day I can feel absolutely horrible , and then another day is better. Hard to imagine that after all this time my body is still trying to stabilize, but then , there was the K switch so maybe that's a part of it.

 

And if I am getting Valium withdrawals , they can last a long time....who knows?

I just have to trust that one day I'll make it off and find some health again.

 

love to everyone, 

Miyu :smitten:

 

I think about Cant and wonder what ever has happened to him.....

 

In the same boat, I can't ever get calm and OK.  The stress intolerance is bad. Every thing I have to do which requires interaction triggers me. For example, I have a very long meeting tommorrow that is not a bad meeting, but I have been amped over it. Also have a needed appointment for a health issue, but the doctor is a 2 hour drive, and I'm inclined to cancel, the anticipatory stress is so bad.

 

I can look at these events logically, and know they are moderately stressful to someone not amped up. However, at this stage, I can not count on being clear headed, or even functional at any time. It is my state of being that stresses me out, and how it makes obligations very difficult. In this state, faking it is very hard. The withdraw is so bad, and leaves me unable to do anything but lie down and breathe, then as it eases, some yoga.

 

How can I engage in business and medical affairs like this? Making appointments is horrible. If I was stable to the point where the withdraw followed a rhythm, it would be easier. Then I could know "OK, 3 hours of this, then it will ease, then 2 hours of that." I have gotten to the "rhythm" in previous cuts, but this one is really dragging out. With the complete unpredictability, and my heightened state of anxiety, I am getting very discouraged and frustrated.

 

I am not  pleased others are suffering, but feel vindicated knowing I am not alone in feeling like I am in a never ending wave with moderate breaks, but never real relief.

 

I hope we stabilize, and soon.

 

 

[[NJ...]]

Thanks, Valley. So relieved to find you all still here--well, for me--I guess it's maybe not good for you?? I agree re pain--I am ok w/ the pain if I know it's w/d but a high ANA sounds very scary and opens another can of worms. And then the panic begins.....

Anyway, your kind words and thoughts very much appreciated...

 

I've had high ANA in the past, never turned into anything for me. A doctor told me 15 years ago I definitely had lupus based on this and some other bloodwork done, guess what? I don't have lupus! If you are worried you can get it checked out but high ANA can also mean not much of anything.

[[Ge...]]

Thanks, Valley. So relieved to find you all still here--well, for me--I guess it's maybe not good for you?? I agree re pain--I am ok w/ the pain if I know it's w/d but a high ANA sounds very scary and opens another can of worms. And then the panic begins.....

Anyway, your kind words and thoughts very much appreciated...

 

I've had high ANA in the past, never turned into anything for me. A doctor told me 15 years ago I definitely had lupus based on this and some other bloodwork done, guess what? I don't have lupus! If you are worried you can get it checked out but high ANA can also mean not much of anything.

 

This!  I have a lupus diagnosis also...

[[NJ...]]

George,

 

Do you actually have lupus? I am still furious that a doctor told me I did, I had/still have NO SYMPTOMS, and 15 years later still have no signs of lupus. It was part of a lot of blood work to figure out why my son had some very serious issues at birth! He is fine now ... but it was no fun when he was little. They also told me he had lupus then. Which he didn't and still does not!

 

ANA is one of those things (I think) could mean something or nothing.

 

I am starting to have some signs of anxiety creeping up. Don't know if it is because I am cutting again or because work is really not great. I am still interviewing for jobs, too. I thought I would have something new by now, I had some offers but not ones I could accept. It is so depressing and so time consuming all the applications and interviews and nothing in hand yet.

[[Ge...]]

George,

 

Do you actually have lupus? I am still furious that a doctor told me I did, I had/still have NO SYMPTOMS, and 15 years later still have no signs of lupus. It was part of a lot of blood work to figure out why my son had some very serious issues at birth! He is fine now ... but it was no fun when he was little. They also told me he had lupus then. Which he didn't and still does not!

 

ANA is one of those things (I think) could mean something or nothing.

 

I am starting to have some signs of anxiety creeping up. Don't know if it is because I am cutting again or because work is really not great. I am still interviewing for jobs, too. I thought I would have something new by now, I had some offers but not ones I could accept. It is so depressing and so time consuming all the applications and interviews and nothing in hand yet.

 

 

 

I don't know if I had lupus.  I may have... I had sudden onset arthritis in my whole body at age 35.  I had a speckled ana, high crp and anti RNA antibodies.  I also would get very sick if I went in the sun.  After a few years it settled down and I was fine as long as I stayed out of the sun.  I finally decided to clean up my diet a go off all the meds a few years ago.  Xanax was the last med to quit and I have been working on that for 18 months..  I still have the speckled ANA and now I have low level Thyroid Abs (just since 2017).  I think it the thyroid thing is from the stress of trying to taper too fast, but who knows. 

 

I am sorry you got that diagnosis for nothing.. I know that diagnosis makes you uninsurable.. I feel like that is the 'we don't know what's wrong with you' diagnosis. 

 

Wow I cant imagine job hunting while tapering..  Just thinking about it causes me anxiety.  I wish you much luck there!  You are a tough lady!! <3

 

 

[[bl...]]

NJ and George;

Thanks so much for the words. I guess that high ANA combined with what I have attributed to Benzo s/x (fingers and feet pain) just sent me to a bad place. I will follow up---likely end up w/ a Lupus or RA diagnosis as well--and pray that it is the drugs!! In any event, your response helps me feel less alone--my husband and friends can only take so much.

Thanks again-a lot--

Blue

[[...]]

hi everyone,

 

First , welcome any new members to this great group of buddies.

 

Valley , I'm so sorry about your chicken , how sad :'( I'm glad you were there for her though.

 

I hope everyone else is doing well, or managing if not.

 

Me, I'm the same , still not well, my body just seems to have decided it doesn't like benzos, ( Not sure it ever really did)

I don't know , I just feel pretty lousy all the time , and especially after dosing. If I didn't feel so horrible I wouldn't be in such a quandry about holding. But I'm afraid it's the same old story , at least as far as the side effects go.

 

I will say however , that I do feel some small improvements in my withdrawal type symptoms. I still can rarely get out or see anyone due to stress intolerance, But my physical symptoms aren't as intense as they were, so I'm grateful for that. every day is different too! One day I can feel absolutely horrible , and then another day is better. Hard to imagine that after all this time my body is still trying to stabilize, but then , there was the K switch so maybe that's a part of it.

 

And if I am getting Valium withdrawals , they can last a long time....who knows?

I just have to trust that one day I'll make it off and find some health again.

 

love to everyone, 

Miyu :smitten:

 

I think about Cant and wonder what ever has happened to him.....

 

In the same boat, I can't ever get calm and OK.  The stress intolerance is bad. Every thing I have to do which requires interaction triggers me. For example, I have a very long meeting tommorrow that is not a bad meeting, but I have been amped over it. Also have a needed appointment for a health issue, but the doctor is a 2 hour drive, and I'm inclined to cancel, the anticipatory stress is so bad.

 

I can look at these events logically, and know they are moderately stressful to someone not amped up. However, at this stage, I can not count on being clear headed, or even functional at any time. It is my state of being that stresses me out, and how it makes obligations very difficult. In this state, faking it is very hard. The withdraw is so bad, and leaves me unable to do anything but lie down and breathe, then as it eases, some yoga.

 

How can I engage in business and medical affairs like this? Making appointments is horrible. If I was stable to the point where the withdraw followed a rhythm, it would be easier. Then I could know "OK, 3 hours of this, then it will ease, then 2 hours of that." I have gotten to the "rhythm" in previous cuts, but this one is really dragging out. With the complete unpredictability, and my heightened state of anxiety, I am getting very discouraged and frustrated.

 

I am not  pleased others are suffering, but feel vindicated knowing I am not alone in feeling like I am in a never ending wave with moderate breaks, but never real relief.

 

I hope we stabilize, and soon.

 

Me too BD...

My stress intolerance is so intense that I can only hold a conversation for a few minutes most of the time.  I don;t understand why its that way for me. It's been that way I think since I was on the steroids, they really were hard on my nervous system. I'm fortunate to have disability... And I applied for IhSS which I got , so now I just have to find some one who I like who will help me with things like shopping and cleaning , laundry etc.

But I'm the same way as you and can't plan anything , and also find phone calls incredibly stressfull.

 

 

Anyway, our bodies are amazing and can heal , I believe in that . I need to get dental work done and just can't face it at the moment. I'm really hoping that things will get easier for me as I get lower in dose, but that could be a long while......

we never know when things could turn around though.

 

Hang in there BDove... you'll make it ,

 

Miyu

 

 

 

 

 

[[He...]]

Hello everyone, it’s me, Heath, again!

I’m not going to tell  anyone not to check with your doctor when you don’t know if something is a wdfx from benzos or something else that may be more serious.

But I thought I’d put my two sense in here.

 

I have this thing with my neck.it comes and goes. Those of you who have been following me know about my neck because I probably complain about it just a wee bit TOO MUCH! Whenever it reappears I th8nk oh oh, here I go. It’s gotta be my spinal,stenosis again...then I scare myself a whole lot, then I think I better slow down my taper because what if I crash? And then, you guessed it, it goes away in a short time just as surprising as it did when it appeared without warning.

 

I’m just trying to say, when you scare yourself, because you just don’t know what the heck is going on, you just make matters worse. Ive done that over and over again!

 

The discussion about ANA test results got me curious so I looked it up on the internet. It says that a positive or high ANA RESULT CAN VERY WELL MEAN NOTHING! If you are really concerned, further testing can be done.

 

I too have pains in my hands and feet: tingles, cramps, shooting pains weak wrists. I had gone to a rheumatologist a while back. Everything came back negative. Do I still have these feet and hand pains, and sometimes my arms? You betcha! But I am ignoring it as much as I can and dealing with it the best I can.

Benzos have the ability to make your whole body sick  in any and all parts of you, and in any and many different ways. We just gotta hold on,and know that THIS TOO SHALL PASS! And one day we will all be free!

So hang in there folks...it’s the benzos devil. :tickedoff: ...you will be fine when it’s time and you will be forever grateful that

you held on!

 

Good luck, be patient and strong. Listen to your body and respect the power of your brain to heal on its own terms and in its own time. Give it the respect and time it needs andIT WILL HEAL!

 

Heath  take care,

[[To...]]

Hello everyone, it’s me, Heath, again!

I’m not going to tell  anyone not to check with your doctor when you don’t know if something is a wdfx from benzos or something else that may be more serious.

But I thought I’d put my two sense in here.

 

I have this thing with my neck.it comes and goes. Those of you who have been following me know about my neck because I probably complain about it just a wee bit TOO MUCH! Whenever it reappears I th8nk oh oh, here I go. It’s gotta be my spinal,stenosis again...then I scare myself a whole lot, then I think I better slow down my taper because what if I crash? And then, you guessed it, it goes away in a short time just as surprising as it did when it appeared without warning.

 

I’m just trying to say, when you scare yourself, because you just don’t know what the heck is going on, you just make matters worse. Ive done that over and over again!

 

The discussion about ANA test results got me curious so I looked it up on the internet. It says that a positive or high ANA RESULT CAN VERY WELL MEAN NOTHING! If you are really concerned, further testing can be done.

 

I too have pains in my hands and feet: tingles, cramps, shooting pains weak wrists. I had gone to a rheumatologist a while back. Everything came back negative. Do I still have these feet and hand pains, and sometimes my arms? You betcha! But I am ignoring it as much as I can and dealing with it the best I can.

Benzos have the ability to make your whole body sick  in any and all parts of you, and in any and many different ways. We just gotta hold on,and know that THIS TOO SHALL PASS! And one day we will all be free!

So hang in there folks...it’s the benzos devil. :tickedoff: ...you will be fine when it’s time and you will be forever grateful that

you held on!

 

Good luck, be patient and strong. Listen to your body and respect the power of your brain to heal on its own terms and in its own time. Give it the respect and time it needs andIT WILL HEAL!

 

Heath  take care,

Heath: way to face these issues head on! I believe that, for many, attitude is a force multiplier against the struggles of overcoming benzos. Keep it up.....