The Long Hold Support Group

[[be...]]

Yes, Begood,

 

Ihave been doing your tennis ball trick. It has helped in the past and it is helping now. This neck tension th8ng is my biggest wdfx, and if it is only this, I really have no reason to complain Compared to other buddies, I am getting off easy.

Thanks always for your care and concern.

Heath

I think it is tension, but of course I am not a Doctor, but I know that not going too fast and watching the % now is really important. You got this.

[[no...]]

Hi Nova, wow it seems like the renovations at your building have been going on forever!  That’s enough to make anyone crazy! The stress and noise must be unbearable! I’m glad you atleast have someone to go visit for part of the day! Seriously, have you tired headphones with music playing to try to cover up the banging from the renovations?

 

Ifind it hard to follow your signature taper, but I think I can gather that you are,..... as of

Aug 23, 2017 .... at  5 1/2 mg Diazepam. Is that right?

And you are holding? You have come so  far from all those others meds you listed that you were able to drop completely! You must be very strong!

 

Ifi am reading correctly, you are down to 5 1/2 mg the Diazepam.

Since you are holding, IMO if you hold until you are really stable, that should make it easier for you to cut agIn once you feel you are stable and ready to start your taper again.

ihope  you cut really small and go really slow . Even if it takes another long time to get off the Diazepam, slow and slower will give you a much easier time.

 

Ihave been following your posts a lot but have never said much becaus I really didn’t know what to say, but I think I understand  it all now.

Good luck ! Ihope the renovations stop soon! And ihope  you will go slow in your taper. Going slow is My downfall.. I find that most of my wdfx  come only when I get impatient and cut too big and/or too fast.

 

Here’s to us turtles!

 

Heath

Hi sweetie  no I had to updose to 10mg in order to move as I had a neighbour from hell  moved in above me when I got down to 3.45mg Diazepam, and I was unable to move or function much this went on for 2 year's of hell I posted about it a LOT at the time as I was in so much despair being so ill and I was unable to move around my home never mind move out  which I became desperate to do. So I had to updose in order to get the hell out I went to 5mg, no good then 5.1/2mg still unable to do anything about moving  so I then went to 8mg finally settling on 10mg and am holding as I'm still very unstable plus since I moved in here there's been nothing but bloody renovations going on!!!

 

But at least I'm now on the first floor not underneath anyone, the 10mg never took away my symptoms what it did do was get me to a place where I was still suffering but able to funtion enough to pack up my home and arrange to move, The first week here was heaven then all hell broke loose bloody renovation city as its housing association property, and it gets done whether you like it or not and you still have to live in the property  while its going on, so its been 6 weeks of hell banging drilling all sorts in the building. I still have to have work done here as mines not finished yet, and who knows wth is going to be going in in the building?

 

I knock an let the neighbours know in advance , but the guy downstairs is in a wheel chair so I don't expect him to come knocking he also uses a walking frame but has had a lot of falls lately. The young couple next door to me are nice people but I've been told by someone across the road that the woman underneath them is a moaning complainer who wants everything her way.

 

So I won't be making friends with her I will be polite if I see her in passing but I'm not getting friendly with her  Anyway I'm holding until all work is finished here and I've de-stressed and stabilised , then I will get back to tapering which I'm looking forward to doing when the time is right,  as I feel some of my symptoms are due to side effects of the drugs but I'm not pushing it as withdrwal is withdrawal one thing at a time.

 

My CNS is still way too unstable and with all the stress its going to take soem time to even out so i'm going to still be holding for a whie yet as its just a week past 3 months now at that dose. I actually just worked it out as I don't bother counting as it will happen when it happnes in its own time nothing I do or don't do will make me stablise or feel better any quicker, just wating and doing what I can when I can 

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

 

 

 

 

[[To...]]

Hello everyone!

Where is everyone?

Hope everyone is feeling good as those in America get ready for a Thanksgiving feast. Maybe that’s

why it’s been pretty quiet on the forum these last two days.

Is everyone busy cooking?

Well whatever the reason, I sure hope everyone is feeling good and no One is in the dumps. If you are,. Remember....things will get better! Stay strong, slow down, be patient, and  POST! WE ARE ALL HERE FOR EVERYONE.

 

Heath 

Hi Heath. Thanks for checking on us. Yes - pretty much mobilizing for Thanksgiving. It is my favorite holiday of the year.

 

I've tolerated my latest cut very well, so everything is pretty manageable. Overnight sleep is still barely 6 hours -- but today I had a breakthrough where I was actually able to take an afternoon nap for a little over an hour -- that is something I have not been able to do for the last year! Made me feel a lot better.

 

I hope you are feeling well and, if you are in the States, Happy Thanksgiving!

[[He...]]

Wow Too Many Bennies,it amazes me how fast you can go in your taper. I cannot go that fast. Ihope youvare being careful.

Yes I’m in the states, California. And yes I’m planning the meal,, busy shopping, and defrosting the turkey. Tomorrow I’ll start the cooking.  I usually go to my sister in laws house  but this year it’s at my house. Thank goodness I am feeling up to having the crowd come here. But I’ll get .lots of help from everyone at cleanup time. And I’ll have left overs for Days! I like that part!

 

Happy Thanksgiving to you and to all the people who are celebrating. I know Ihave a lot to be thankful for.

 

Heath :smitten:

[[To...]]

Wow Too Many Bennies,it amazes me how fast you can go in your taper. I cannot go that fast. Ihope youvare being careful.

Yes I’m in the states, California. And yes I’m planning the meal,, busy shopping, and defrosting the turkey. Tomorrow I’ll start the cooking.  I usually go to my sister in laws house  but this year it’s at my house. Thank goodness I am feeling up to having the crowd come here. But I’ll get .lots of help from everyone at cleanup time. And I’ll have left overs for Days! I like that part!

 

Happy Thanksgiving to you and to all the people who are celebrating. I know Ihave a lot to be thankful for.

 

Heath :smitten:

Heath - that is awesome that you will be hosting Thanksgiving! It will work out great and you will feel so good to have your family around you. What a great holiday it is.

 

Regarding my taper, I have been very disciplined and deliberate, reading my body the entire way. I am nearly a year into it and, ever since I crossed the 1mg mark, the cuts have been more manageable than they were at higher doses (I expected it to be the opposite). I think I have also increased my 'pain' threshold and have learned to work through (survive) my episodes of strong anxiety and sleep struggles. I guess I figure that those problems will be there, for me, regardless of whether I am medicated or not and I have to face them sooner or later. This is somewhat scary and significant challenges remain. I'm just going to have to ride it out and feel my way through it. I spent too many years numbing the pain.

 

I plan on having a great turkey day, around family, which is the greatest medicine of all. I hope you have a great turkey day as well!

[[He...]]

Wow Too Many Bennies,it amazes me how fast you can go in your taper. I cannot go that fast. Ihope youvare being careful.

Yes I’m in the states, California. And yes I’m planning the meal,, busy shopping, and defrosting the turkey. Tomorrow I’ll start the cooking.  I usually go to my sister in laws house  but this year it’s at my house. Thank goodness I am feeling up to having the crowd come here. But I’ll get .lots of help from everyone at cleanup time. And I’ll have left overs for Days! I like that part!

 

Happy Thanksgiving to you and to all the people who are celebrating. I know Ihave a lot to be thankful for.

 

Heath :smitten:

Heath - that is awesome that you will be hosting Thanksgiving! It will work out great and you will feel so good to have your family around you. What a great holiday it is.

 

Regarding my taper, I have been very disciplined and deliberate, reading my body the entire way. I am nearly a year into it and, ever since I crossed the 1mg mark, the cuts have been more manageable than they were at higher doses (I expected it to be the opposite). I think I have also increased my 'pain' threshold and have learned to work through (survive) my episodes of strong anxiety and sleep struggles. I guess I figure that those problems will be there, for me, regardless of whether I am medicated or not and I have to face them sooner or later. This is somewhat scary and significant challenges remain. I'm just going to have to ride it out and feel my way through it. I spent too many years numbing the pain.

 

I plan on having a great turkey day, around family, which is the greatest medicine of all. I hope you have a great turkey day as well!

 

 

Thanks Bennies,

 

Have a great Turkey day, and if there are any other kinds of “turkeys” among your family and friends, ....well.... DONT LET THE TURKEYS GET YA DOWN!

All the best, Heath

[[Va...]]

Well  welcome back  Valley! You certainly were missed by everyone here! So glad to see you here again! Hope things are getting better!

 

Heath

Hi Heath! Things are better for now.  —V

[[Va...]]

Hi all

I’m down to .775 Yay!  but that old neck tension has surfaced again for about the past two weeks. I’m wearing my trusted neck collar on and off because it really takes away 90% of the pain.

Just don’t know if it’s wdsx or my spinal stenosis acting up.

Last time this pain came it hung around for a couple of months and disappeared. I never did discover what the cause was.

But many buddies on this forum have the same neck tension and they say it’s a common wdsx so that’s what I chalked  it up to.

 

So now I’m thinking I’m goibg too fast in my taper...but I’ve got no other wdsx, and my sleep has gotten much better. So I really don’t know! Guess I’ll never know. But better slow down.

 

I’m doing a reduction of 10% every 2 months. And yes I know that  I need  to re-calibrate that 10% on my last previous dose and not do a straight 10% each time.

In all honesty, iknow I’m NOT doing that. BUT iDO PUT IN A HOLD OF ABOUT 10 Days after every 5% reduction. I figure that gives my brain time to catch up.

This is all Hit and miss I suppose as long as I keep it slow. I’d really like to be below .7 by years end but I’m beginning to realize that that is probably just wishful thinking!  A pipe dream!    See, here I go again, referring to a date on the calendar! Not supposed to do that I know! Supposed to throw away the calendar ....dummy!

 

I probably should be listening to my neck tension and take it as a warning that I’m going into dangerous territory.and i better SLOW DOWN!

See I know what I need to do! But why do I have have such a hard time doing it?  Yea, I know. BENZO BRAIN!  I’m truly a jerk, a moron, an idiot, 

What the heck is wrong with me?

I’m chastising myself. Maybe that will help? Giving my self some public humiliation on the forum! Maybe that will help?

 

OH GOLLY HEATH    :tickedoff: WHY DONT YOU LISTEN TO YOURSELF??

:nono: :tickedoff:

 

Heath

I wish I knew what to tell you Heath.  My sxs are getting better and better the lower I go.  I do spend several sleepless nights in a row pacing and doing things all night, but it doesn’t have much impact on my daily functioning.  I think I’ve been a zombie for so long and I’m waking up.  I do think the best thing to do is listen to your body.  I slowed down when I hit 3.5 and seem to have found my “sweet spot” for tapering.  Hope your tension fades away.  —V

[[Va...]]

Heath-

 

Hi, I'm not really a long holder person, but a good friend said this is a good group so I wanted to check it out, which I have before!

 

As I was "checking it out" I noticed the discussion of yours about neck tension.  I've had this my whole, long, hard taper and it's horrible!!! I feel your pain (literally)!  Lol. I also major head stuff and I know it's all WD.  Very annoying, right?!

 

You mentioned you use a neck brace and it helps? Might be something to look into.  You are also so low in your taper and still have this!?  I was hoping by the time I'm where you are, that symptom would be gone. I guess not. 

 

Well, it seems your doing well and I hope you can adjust your taper if needed. Always nice to see someone who shares symptoms!

 

Rach.

Hi Rachel.  I’ve had the neck tension during my taper but it has strangely resolved and I haven’t had it for quite a while.  I do know that going slow and holding when needed have been what has worked for me.  I hope you can get rid of it as you taper by listening to your body.  —V

[[Va...]]

[move]HAPPY THANKSGIVING ALL![/move]

[[Va...]]

Nova. So sorry about the stress you’ve had to deal with.  You have been a strength to so many here.  I hope everything settles down. —V

[[He...]]

Thanks for your input Valley.

I am slowing down a bit. My neck tension seems to be resolving itself. I didn’t need to wear the neck collar much yesterday or today. It could very well not have much to do with my taper but going to fast certainly adds to the tension I am sure. My sleep is so much better since I got below .9 mg and ihave needed to take only one 3.75 Remeron pill about every 3 weeks ( if my sleep goes below 5 hours a night for 3 day’s in a row. And that happens quite rarely, so that’s really good for me!)

 

Sorry I was whining a few days ago.  

I’m doing pretty good. My neck tension is just about the only wdfx I have so I really had no right to complain. 

 

I’m glad your taper is going well. And I’m glad to see you here. and a very Happy Thanksgiving to you too!

By the way, HOW IS YOUR SWEET COOKIE DOING? I remember she was sick but she had rallied and got better, right? Hope so!

Heath

 

[[Va...]]

Thanks for your input Valley.

I am slowing down a bit. My neck tension seems to be resolving itself. I didn’t need to wear the neck collar much yesterday or today. It could very well not have much to do with my taper but going to fast certainly adds to the tension I am sure. My sleep is so much better since I got below .9 mg and ihave needed to take only one 3.75 Remeron pill about every 3 weeks ( if my sleep goes below 5 hours a night for 3 day’s in a row. And that happens quite rarely, so that’s really good for me!)

 

Sorry I was whining a few days ago.  

I’m doing pretty good. My neck tension is just about the only wdfx I have so I really had no right to complain. 

 

I’m glad your taper is going well. And I’m glad to see you here. By the way, HOW IS YOUR SWEET COOKIE DOING? I remember she was sick but she had rallied and got better, right? Hope so!

Heath

Glad to hear things are letting up for you.  Poor Cookie is being neglected lately as I’m so busy lol. I don’t sleep much if at all, but that seems to be my only symptom besides loss of appetite. I can’t believe how much weight I’ve lost. I went from 160 to 185 when I first started and now down to 145. I look like Tom Hanks in Castaway lol. Oh well it will come back and I will sleep again some day. Not complaining though. I’m still very functional.  —V

[[He...]]

Thanks for your input Valley.

I am slowing down a bit. My neck tension seems to be resolving itself. I didn’t need to wear the neck collar much yesterday or today. It could very well not have much to do with my taper but going to fast certainly adds to the tension I am sure. My sleep is so much better since I got below .9 mg and ihave needed to take only one 3.75 Remeron pill about every 3 weeks ( if my sleep goes below 5 hours a night for 3 day’s in a row. And that happens quite rarely, so that’s really good for me!)

 

Sorry I was whining a few days ago.  

I’m doing pretty good. My neck tension is just about the only wdfx I have so I really had no right to complain. 

 

I’m glad your taper is going well. And I’m glad to see you here. By the way, HOW IS YOUR SWEET COOKIE DOING? I remember she was sick but she had rallied and got better, right? Hope so!

Heath

Glad to hear things are letting up for you.  Poor Cookie is being neglected lately as I’m so busy lol. I don’t sleep much if at all, but that seems to be my only symptom besides loss of appetite. I can’t believe how much weight I’ve lost. I went from 160 to 185 when I first started and now down to 145. I look like Tom Hanks in Castaway lol. Oh well it will come back and I will sleep again some day. Not complaining though. I’m still very functional.  —V

 

Hey Valley,

I’ll gladly give you a couple of pounds if you really want them! Idon’t know if it’s the benzo or what, but I’ve put on a good 12 pounds in the last 12 months!

Does tapering make a person gain weight? I used to eat anything I wanted and never gained weight. Was never over 110 lbs. now, well, I have to watch everything I eat and I hate it!

 

Heath

[[be...]]

Hi Valley you have lost a lot of weight, but I am sure once things settle down you will regain some, looking shipwrecked is not always a good look, no matter we all know that you got this. Be kind to you and please take time to go pet and coo over our Mascot Sweet [glow=red,2,300]"COOKIE"[/glow]  Stay Strong.  

[[Ge...]]

Happy Thanksgiving long holders!! ...  When I started this process I never imagined I'd still be tapering at the end of 2017.  Now I know that I will be tapering for a very long time...  I'm am thankful for all of you that support this idea of of going very, very slowly to get off benzos when needed.  For me it is the way to go. 

[[no...]]

Nova. So sorry about the stress you’ve had to deal with.  You have been a strength to so many here.  I hope everything settles down. —V

:hug: :smitten:

[[Va...]]

Hi Valley you have lost a lot of weight, but I am sure once things settle down you will regain some, looking shipwrecked is not always a good look, no matter we all know that you got this. Be kind to you and please take time to go pet and coo over our Mascot Sweet [glow=red,2,300]"COOKIE"[/glow]  Stay Strong.  

Thanks BG.  I’m sure the weight will come back.  I believe it is mostly related to the ongoing stress rather than the tapering. 

 

Just fed the Cookie and the girls some shredded cheese.  Have to keep them happy lol.  —V

[[Va...]]

Well the weirdest thing happened to one of my chickens...  I was outside playing with my granddaughter and the chickens were laying under a lawn table.  All of a sudden one of them got startled and flew up and hit her head on the top of the table a couple of times and started jerking around.  I ran over and picked her up but she was seizuring and her head just hung down.  I felt the life drain out of her and realized she had broken her neck when she hit the table.  Very strange but at least she didn’t suffer.  Now down to 5 hens. 

[[be...]]

Well the weirdest thing happened to one of my chickens...  I was outside playing with my granddaughter and the chickens were laying under a lawn table.  All of a sudden one of them got startled and flew up and hit her head on the top of the table a couple of times and started jerking around.  I ran over and picked her up but she was seizuring and her head just hung down.  I felt the life drain out of her and realized she had broken her neck when she hit the table.  Very strange but at least she didn’t suffer.  Now down to 5 hens. 

Oh gosh, do you think something spooked her? I hope [glow=red,2,300]"COOKIE"[/glow] was looking the other way. You are very kind to pick her up and check her, some would just let her lie there, you will have comfort knowing she was not alone. :'(

[[Va...]]

Well the weirdest thing happened to one of my chickens...  I was outside playing with my granddaughter and the chickens were laying under a lawn table.  All of a sudden one of them got startled and flew up and hit her head on the top of the table a couple of times and started jerking around.  I ran over and picked her up but she was seizuring and her head just hung down.  I felt the life drain out of her and realized she had broken her neck when she hit the table.  Very strange but at least she didn’t suffer.  Now down to 5 hens. 

Oh gosh, do you think something spooked her? I hope [glow=red,2,300]"COOKIE"[/glow] was looking the other way. You are very kind to pick her up and check her, some would just let her lie there, you will have comfort knowing she was not alone. :'(

Yes.  Something definitely spooked her. I just happened to be looking at them when it all happened. It was the weirdest thing to see. I thought she was having a seizure until I realized her neck was broken.  —V

[Guest [Bu...]]

Hi,Oscar, hope you don't mind my replying to your post ? i see you been on Valium for a very long time. its wicked stuff to kick yeah, but you doing great, i am trying to taper slowly i read your post and you gave me hope at last lol couple of weeks ago i had a bad rebound after kicking 5mg Valium i was clean for just over 6 months then all hell broke loose lol had extreme panic attacks that lasted hours seemed like forever, anxiety no sleep bad tinnitus i thought i was gonna die, this was my worst episode by far ! i did not want to  reinstate Valium what so ever, but i needed to get myself together sooo reluctantly i decided to reinstate 5mg Valium once daily for 1 week , god within the hour all my anxiety panic attacks disappeared apart from my tinnitus which is still bad i slept sound that week best sleep i had had in over 12 months lol, anyways i have now started tapering i am trying 5% Valium daily for 2 weeks see how i go, then go from there ? i would be real great full for any help given, from any one of you kind folks  stay safe everyone, Derek. 

[[Ge...]]

Hi Derek, Welcome to the group.  Those of us who hang out here are believers in tapering slowly.  Glad to have you!

[[Se...]]

Happy Thanksgiving long holders!! ...  When I started this process I never imagined I'd still be tapering at the end of 2017.  Now I know that I will be tapering for a very long time...  I'm am thankful for all of you that support this idea of of going very, very slowly to get off benzos when needed.  For me it is the way to go. 

 

I hear you!  I started tapering last December from only .25 mg xanax. Gave myself a "conservative" 3 months to taper.        Still tapering. I have to remain functional for work so I am taking the slow approach also.

[[be...]]

Happy Thanksgiving long holders!! ...  When I started this process I never imagined I'd still be tapering at the end of 2017.  Now I know that I will be tapering for a very long time...  I'm am thankful for all of you that support this idea of of going very, very slowly to get off benzos when needed.  For me it is the way to go. 

 

I hear you!  I started tapering last December from only .25 mg xanax. Gave myself a "conservative" 3 months to taper.        Still tapering. I have to remain functional for work so I am taking the slow approach also.

Ditto George, it has been a really long time and since I am going at a turtle's walk...I just do not think of how long...no use, I am in this for the long haul.