The Long Hold Support Group

[[sl...]]

Hello Nova 

Good to see you again - great post about the "tolerance withdrawal" 

 

Hello to Lynn and Heath as well.

Love and good wishes to all.

[[sl...]]

Does anyone have trouble adjusting to the time change with their doses?

Yes I do - and that goes for my meal times too.

If it that your hour has gone 1 hour back[?]  which is the case in the UK just now, I used to feel ready for my dose an hour early, and my food

I just tried to hold on for as long as I could and took the dose when I felt I really needed it - after a few days of going a little bit longer each time, I found it adjusted itself.

 

When I got to India this October, they were 4 and a half hours ahead of the UK - it's now 5 and a half hours because the UK has gone back an hour.

I have a rule of following local time as soon as I arrive, so as to minimise jet lag but I probably have kind of taken an extra dose at some point - and maybe an extra meal or two 

Just another little complication life throws at us

[[He...]]

Apparently I’m very low in B12 and vitamin d

Has anyone had a problem with b12 shots. .....?  OR VITAMIN D

Thanks

❤️HS

[[NJ...]]

I cannot take vitamin d; it causes insomnia for me, even if I take it in the morning, and a small dose. Everyone though reacts differently.

[[Su...]]

Apparently I’m very low in B12 and vitamin d

Has anyone had a problem with b12 shots. .....?  OR VITAMIN D

Thanks

❤️HS

I haven't had a b12 shot, but have had an increase in sxs from oral b vitamins.  Can you try it out and see how it affects you  first?

Vitamin D is fine for me....

[[He...]]

Grateful for the responses.... my doc says my b12 is so low.... could be the cause of anxiety and depression.......afraid of the shot

 

I’m terrible with supplements but I’m so worried about my mental health ......and pain.....which he also says can be caused by this....

 

I’ll keep you posted.

 

I know vitamin d has effected me in the past but I have to only take it once a week.

❤️HS

 

THANKS

[[...]]

So good to hear from you Nova ! 

I think about you a lot and wonder how you are .

 

I'm so glad you've moved ,but what an  ordeal ... Your poor body . Anyway it sounds like you will have. A better time of it once the downstairs neighbor is settled .

 

Let us know how you are whenever you can . 

 

Dear Heath .... Thank you for your kind thoughts .... I am actually already  taking the Valium at night... It helps me sleep . I take the k during the day , well, it complicated , but I take it like this -

 

10.30 am .10k

4.30 pm  .10k

10.30 pm. .05 k / 1 mg V

4.30 am .05 k / 1 mg V

 

I still get interdose WDs with the K .... About 1 hr befriend my dose is due I start to get more symptoms .... But as I have many anyway it's all a it of a blur .

 

I sure hope that I am in WD still and it's not all or any toxicity from the K or V ..

I certainly feel unwell after dosing , but I can tell I'm also in WD , so maybe it's both . At any rate , I hope holding will help my nervous system at least . Time will tell .

 

 

Love to everyone , MiYu 

 

 

 

[[Ca...]]

Apparently I’m very low in B12 and vitamin d

Has anyone had a problem with b12 shots. .....?  OR VITAMIN D

Thanks

❤️HS

I found b12 and b6 to be very helpful with anxiety and sleep. Never had the shots.

[[Ca...]]

So I did one of my cranial sacral massages today with a very experienced massage therapist: one of her insights into benzo withdrawal is that since those drugs mask/blunt emotional reactions, every time we step down we have to re-experience some of the trauma and distress we were trying to avoid, and that that takes a while to resolve episodically. I find this to be true: after I went down this last time I had a couple of shocks having to do with beloved family members, and this triggered older traumas. Might be a comforting thing to remember as we go through the process...

[[NJ...]]

So I did one of my cranial sacral massages today with a very experienced massage therapist: one of her insights into benzo withdrawal is that since those drugs mask/blunt emotional reactions, every time we step down we have to re-experience some of the trauma and distress we were trying to avoid, and that that takes a while to resolve episodically. I find this to be true: after I went down this last time I had a couple of shocks having to do with beloved family members, and this triggered older traumas. Might be a comforting thing to remember as we go through the process...

 

This is somewhat comforting. I do think that I have avoided for many years some of the issues that all of a sudden are coming to the forefront during this process. I had a bit of an "emergency" session tonight with my therapist as I am so symptomatic due to potentially changing jobs, I have offers, scared to make a move, scared not to make a move, my mom is showing signs of dementia, my son left for college at quite a distance two months ago, and the anniversary of my dad's death is coming up. I am pre-menopausal and I think my hormones are really messing me up, too. When I write this, I realize I should actually be a mess, this is quite a bit to deal with. I just feel that now, stress pushes me so far over the edge it is hard to pull myself back.

 

 

I am glad for this group, who is committed to supporting those of us who are taking our time with this process.

[[He...]]

Had a b12 shot this morning....pretty speedy and uncomfortable

[[NJ...]]

Had a b12 shot this morning....pretty speedy and uncomfortable

 

Hopefully it will bring you some relief!

[[Su...]]

Had a b12 shot this morning....pretty speedy and uncomfortable

let us know how it affects you!

[[He...]]

Well all I can say is I won’t make this mistake twice.....I don’t understand why I refuse to listen to my gut instincts.    It has ramped up everything. ARGH

❤️HS

[[...]]

So I did one of my cranial sacral massages today with a very experienced massage therapist: one of her insights into benzo withdrawal is that since those drugs mask/blunt emotional reactions, every time we step down we have to re-experience some of the trauma and distress we were trying to avoid, and that that takes a while to resolve episodically. I find this to be true: after I went down this last time I had a couple of shocks having to do with beloved family members, and this triggered older traumas. Might be a comforting thing to remember as we go through the process...

 

I completely agree with this Cally .....

I think the hard part is , not only do we have to confront traumas as we step down ( and it's harder fro those of us who have trauma to resolve ) , the meds  actually have a rebound effect that intensifies everything emotionally , which  in turn can intensify physical symptoms .....

 

 

My doc agreed to my keeping the 2 mgs Valium , yay !

 

Love, MiYu 

[[He...]]

So I did one of my cranial sacral massages today with a very experienced massage therapist: one of her insights into benzo withdrawal is that since those drugs mask/blunt emotional reactions, every time we step down we have to re-experience some of the trauma and distress we were trying to avoid, and that that takes a while to resolve episodically. I find this to be true: after I went down this last time I had a couple of shocks having to do with beloved family members, and this triggered older traumas. Might be a comforting thing to remember as we go through the process...

 

I completely agree with this Cally .....

I think the hard part is , not only do we have to confront traumas as we step down ( and it's harder fro those of us who have trauma to resolve ) , the meds  actually have a rebound effect that intensifies everything emotionally , which  in turn can intensify physical symptoms .....

 

 

My doc agreed to my keeping the 2 mgs Valium , yay !

 

Love, MiYu 

 

MiYu, Does that mean you won’t taper the Valium and the klonopin both at the same time?

Does that mean you will stay on the Valium and taper just the klonopin for now? And then you will taper the Valium only after you get off of the klonopin completely?

If that’s so and I’m understanding it correctly, I think that is a VERY GOOD IDEA!

 

Heath

[[He...]]

Oh boy..I’m missing Valley!

Hope you are doing ok Valley. I can only imagine how tough this is for you. This happened to my son, and they didn’t have any kids. It was and still is very tough. But it’s getting better. It’s been 5 mos so far. I hope things settle for you soon. One day at a time.

 

Heath

[[Wo...]]

Hi, I could use some support and advice if anyone has it to give.  I am at .07 K.  I have been dry cutting using a gram scale and have been going down about 10% per week since I got to .25 (previous I was cutting much quicker).  I held once for two weeks since the .25 but otherwise I've been making steady cuts and had a nice window for a couple of weeks.  Now, it's been a two week wave and I decided to hold here until I stabilize.  Some things that are coming up for me: Shame.  I feel ashamed of the fact that I have been on a daily dose of K for 5 months to get off a PRN of Ativan that I was on for a couple of years and that by long holding I will be on it even longer.  And that it somehow makes me "bad".  I do not know why I have this shame, I guess it's because of the shame of dependency, maybe don't know.  The other thing that comes up for me is Fear.  Will I actually stabilize by holding for awhile? Is it the "right" way to get off of this stuff?

 

I'd love any feedback.  I know there are avid fans of the long hold and I'd love to hear from you! If I continued to do the 10% cut per week I may have a couple more months but if I stay on the hold (could stay for a month not sure) I don't know how long I'd be on and that worries me.

 

Thanks!

 

 

[[Ca...]]

Hi, I could use some support and advice if anyone has it to give.  I am at .07 K.  I have been dry cutting using a gram scale and have been going down about 10% per week since I got to .25 (previous I was cutting much quicker).  I held once for two weeks since the .25 but otherwise I've been making steady cuts and had a nice window for a couple of weeks.  Now, it's been a two week wave and I decided to hold here until I stabilize.  Some things that are coming up for me: Shame.  I feel ashamed of the fact that I have been on a daily dose of K for 5 months to get off a PRN of Ativan that I was on for a couple of years and that by long holding I will be on it even longer.  And that it somehow makes me "bad".  I do not know why I have this shame, I guess it's because of the shame of dependency, maybe don't know.  The other thing that comes up for me is Fear.  Will I actually stabilize by holding for awhile? Is it the "right" way to get off of this stuff?

 

I'd love any feedback.  I know there are avid fans of the long hold and I'd love to hear from you! If I continued to do the 10% cut per week I may have a couple more months but if I stay on the hold (could stay for a month not sure) I don't know how long I'd be on and that worries me.

 

Thanks!

 

Shame and Fear are my top two as well: the shame not only of becoming dependent but also not being strong and determined enough to get off. I know so many people - and all the doctors - who say they have no problem just dropping some of these meds - and I know they do exist, but clearly many of us really do. The woman who cleaned my teeth two days ago was telling me about her sister-in-law, who is so addicted to benzos at this point she cannot function, and cannot get off. It truly is an epidemic out there, and although it does not divest us of the responsibility to get better and put our lives back together, I think it is fair to recognize how victimized we've been by the medical community. Anger is more appropriate than shame.

And fear is just a withdrawal symptom - it will dissipate. Somebody a few posts up talked about the rebound effect - when you make a cut there's a temporary intensification of old symptoms - and fear for me falls in that category. I do feel as if I am coming out of my wave, but part of it was fear so intense I couldn't face things like running my school club and driving to Long Island. I mean, gimme a break here. We go forward. Distract. Live a normal life to the greatest extent possible. Have patience with yourself and faith in this incredible community.

 

[[He...]]

Fear and shame are big issues fir me too.

[[bb...]]

Cally- I love your second paragraph! It's perfect! That's EXACTLY how I feel in a wave. We all try to live as normally as possible through this. Thank you for your post!

[[...]]

So I did one of my cranial sacral massages today with a very experienced massage therapist: one of her insights into benzo withdrawal is that since those drugs mask/blunt emotional reactions, every time we step down we have to re-experience some of the trauma and distress we were trying to avoid, and that that takes a while to resolve episodically. I find this to be true: after I went down this last time I had a couple of shocks having to do with beloved family members, and this triggered older traumas. Might be a comforting thing to remember as we go through the process...

 

I completely agree with this Cally .....

I think the hard part is , not only do we have to confront traumas as we step down ( and it's harder fro those of us who have trauma to resolve ) , the meds  actually have a rebound effect that intensifies everything emotionally , which  in turn can intensify physical symptoms .....

 

 

My doc agreed to my keeping the 2 mgs Valium , yay !

 

Love, MiYu 

 

MiYu, Does that mean you won’t taper the Valium and the klonopin both at the same time?

Does that mean you will stay on the Valium and taper just the klonopin for now? And then you will taper the Valium only after you get off of the klonopin completely?

If that’s so and I’m understanding it correctly, I think that is a VERY GOOD IDEA!

 

Heath

 

You got it right Heath .... the k will go first ( when I'm ready) , and the 2 mgs V will be left til last , it will be good to have the long acting benzo already in place when I get there !

Love to you Heath , and everyone , I miss valley too !

Hope he's ok ,

 

MiYu 

[[...]]

Hi, I could use some support and advice if anyone has it to give.  I am at .07 K.  I have been dry cutting using a gram scale and have been going down about 10% per week since I got to .25 (previous I was cutting much quicker).  I held once for two weeks since the .25 but otherwise I've been making steady cuts and had a nice window for a couple of weeks.  Now, it's been a two week wave and I decided to hold here until I stabilize.  Some things that are coming up for me: Shame.  I feel ashamed of the fact that I have been on a daily dose of K for 5 months to get off a PRN of Ativan that I was on for a couple of years and that by long holding I will be on it even longer.  And that it somehow makes me "bad".  I do not know why I have this shame, I guess it's because of the shame of dependency, maybe don't know.  The other thing that comes up for me is Fear.  Will I actually stabilize by holding for awhile? Is it the "right" way to get off of this stuff?

 

I'd love any feedback.  I know there are avid fans of the long hold and I'd love to hear from you! If I continued to do the 10% cut per week I may have a couple more months but if I stay on the hold (could stay for a month not sure) I don't know how long I'd be on and that worries me.

 

Thanks!

 

Hi WW,

I'll try to answer you're question tho I'm not the expert , hopefully others will be on and have some advice too .

If you go a few pages back you.l see a long list of quotes about long holds and their value , it might help you to not be so concerned about holding , if you haven't read it , it's a whole different way of approaching getting off benzos....

You've made such great progres and to have a long window is a great sign of healing .

 

I understand the shame ... I feel ,how did I let myself get into this mess ?

We didn't know .....

Fear , yes that's part of the deal for many of us , the rebound fear , and a pretty normal symptom .

 

If Valley were here , and he's our trusted expert , he'd advise you to hold until you feel stable again .

Given you've got this far you're doing very well, and I certainly wouldn't feel rushed to press forward until you feel better .

 

I have had to go through many rounds of reassessing my taper . I've only managed 2 mgs Valium reduction in 1-1/2 yrs ! And I wasn't on very long either . That's .10 k .

I have to keep coming back to , if I feel terrible , there's no point in cutting , it'll only bring in more symptoms.

 

Nova posted some quotes also a page or so back that you might find helpful .

 

Hope this helps , stay here in this group and you'll get all the support you need .

Love, MiYu

 

 

[[sl...]]

So I did one of my cranial sacral massages today with a very experienced massage therapist: one of her insights into benzo withdrawal is that since those drugs mask/blunt emotional reactions, every time we step down we have to re-experience some of the trauma and distress we were trying to avoid, and that that takes a while to resolve episodically. I find this to be true: after I went down this last time I had a couple of shocks having to do with beloved family members, and this triggered older traumas. Might be a comforting thing to remember as we go through the process...

 

I completely agree with this Cally .....

I think the hard part is , not only do we have to confront traumas as we step down ( and it's harder fro those of us who have trauma to resolve ) , the meds  actually have a rebound effect that intensifies everything emotionally , which  in turn can intensify physical symptoms .....

 

 

My doc agreed to my keeping the 2 mgs Valium , yay !

 

Love, MiYu 

 

MiYu, Does that mean you won’t taper the Valium and the klonopin both at the same time?

Does that mean you will stay on the Valium and taper just the klonopin for now? And then you will taper the Valium only after you get off of the klonopin completely?

If that’s so and I’m understanding it correctly, I think that is a VERY GOOD IDEA!

 

Heath

 

You got it right Heath .... the k will go first ( when I'm ready) , and the 2 mgs V will be left til last , it will be good to have the long acting benzo already in place when I get there !

Love to you Heath , and everyone , I miss valley too !

Hope he's ok ,

 

MiYu 

I'm also very happy for you MiYu 

Good luck - you are being strong and brave 

[[An...]]

Hi everyone,

I wish healing blessings to all.

Kindly advise if possible. I am tapering Ativan, and do 20 days liquid taper, and hold for 30 days.

I drop .001mgs per day.

Regardless of the holds, my symptoms are the same.

I am struggling today, with non stop palpitations. They echo at the base of my throat.

They are unnerving and frightening. I have had them before, but never at this level.

My BP is fine, and my home BP devise does pick them up.

Also, 4 days ago, I had an EKG as part of my yearly exam, which was normal.

Please help. Have any of you here had this type of palpitations? If so, did you need medication?

Thank you http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/Smileys/standard/smitten.gif

Loving blessings,

Anoushka