The Long Hold Support Group

[[ga...]]

 

Popping in to Say Hello and to Re-Post my Long Hold Story

 

http://static.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2017/02/rescued-baby-sloths-conversation-fb__700-png.jpg

 

I started my taper off of Xanax at a rate dictated by my original doctor. He said I could get off completely in 4-6 months. After 6 weeks I crashed so badly I couldn't function to take care of myself and was so agoraphobic I could barely leave the house. My adult children had to help me take care of myself (get groceries, drive me to appointments, set up my meds, etc.). I felt a total failure. Life was daily horror.

 

I switched to a slow daily micro-taper which was gentler. My symptoms were better, but still intolerable. I very slowly crossed to Librium. I traded anxiety for depression. I could semi-function but life was misery.

 

My doctor left the practice. My new doctor told me to hold until I stabilized, so I did. It took 4 months to see improvement. It took 6 months to be able to function independently (especially set up my own meds without messing them up). It was nearly a year before I felt well enough to taper again. During this year, as I was able to do more and more on my own, I got my ducks in a row better (made better social connections, improved my coping techniques) so I was better prepared and less scared about tapering again.

 

I started tapering again. I began with just one micro-taper cut the first week. Then slowly increased to near 10% per month. When my symptoms went up, I held 3 weeks. I am now tapering closer to 5%. My doctor is allowing this pace at this time.

 

I am now tapering with much less pain. Yes, I still have symptoms. Yes, I still struggle. But I am not living in hell every day. When I have a wave, I know a window is coming. I am more independent and less leaning on my adult children. They are starting to worry less about me. That alone has made this all worth it.

 

When I was holding, I thought I was wasting time. I was not. I was healing. I was preparing my brain and my body for a successful taper. I believe I will step off without long-term damage. It's a long way away, but I have learned patience through all of this. I will be a stronger, more patient person when this is all done.

 

One day closer to freedom!

 

Gard

 

[[Be...]]

Hi, this last 8 months I have cut in total 30%, would you say that that's a lot ?. I havnt cut for 2 months now as ive decided to go onto a long hold. I hardly feel any better so im wondering if its worth holding any longer. 2yrs 6months ago i was on 30mg of valium, I'm now on 2mgs.Any advice please.  Cheryl xx

[[He...]]

I just read on Facebook that today is international sloth day.....seriously.....or at least I seriously read it on Facebook

❤️HS

[[...]]

 

Popping in to Say Hello and to Re-Post my Long Hold Story

 

http://static.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2017/02/rescued-baby-sloths-conversation-fb__700-png.jpg

 

I started my taper off of Xanax at a rate dictated by my original doctor. He said I could get off completely in 4-6 months. After 6 weeks I crashed so badly I couldn't function to take care of myself and was so agoraphobic I could barely leave the house. My adult children had to help me take care of myself (get groceries, drive me to appointments, set up my meds, etc.). I felt a total failure. Life was daily horror.

 

I switched to a slow daily micro-taper which was gentler. My symptoms were better, but still intolerable. I very slowly crossed to Librium. I traded anxiety for depression. I could semi-function but life was misery.

 

My doctor left the practice. My new doctor told me to hold until I stabilized, so I did. It took 4 months to see improvement. It took 6 months to be able to function independently (especially set up my own meds without messing them up). It was nearly a year before I felt well enough to taper again. During this year, as I was able to do more and more on my own, I got my ducks in a row better (made better social connections, improved my coping techniques) so I was better prepared and less scared about tapering again.

 

I started tapering again. I began with just one micro-taper cut the first week. Then slowly increased to near 10% per month. When my symptoms went up, I held 3 weeks. I am now tapering closer to 5%. My doctor is allowing this pace at this time.

 

I am now tapering with much less pain. Yes, I still have symptoms. Yes, I still struggle. But I am not living in hell every day. When I have a wave, I know a window is coming. I am more independent and less leaning on my adult children. They are starting to worry less about me. That alone has made this all worth it.

 

When I was holding, I thought I was wasting time. I was not. I was healing. I was preparing my brain and my body for a successful taper. I believe I will step off without long-term damage. It's a long way away, but I have learned patience through all of this. I will be a stronger, more patient person when this is all done.

 

One day closer to freedom!

 

Gard

 

Thanks! I am so encouraged by reading your post. I have years to go, but that is alright. I just want to be functional and have quality of life. 

[[He...]]

I am missing CANT, MIYU, FREEME and others.

 

WHERE ARE YOU? I hope you are all alright!

 

Good to hear from you Gard. Hope all is well.

 

Heath

 

[[fr...]]

  Heath,  I am here, just not posting much.  I am like Healing.  Very sick and don't want to keep harping on it.  I don't know which way to turn at this point.  Had an EMG test done on my nerves.  Normal, so I guess its w/d symptom.  It is crippling me and I don't know how long I can hang on.  Just hate to always be the one who is doing horribly.  Sorry for all who are having a bad time also.  Thanks for thinking of me. 

[[He...]]

It's ok freeme you and I can hang together. 

[[fr...]]

  Yea, the group no one wants to be in. 

[[Va...]]

Sorry I’ve been away.  My wife left me this week and having to deal with the fallout.  I’ll check back in when things settle down a bit. Hope all are doing well. —V

[[be...]]

Sorry I’ve been away.  My wife left me this week and having to deal with the fallout.  I’ll check back in when things settle down a bit. Hope all are doing well. —V

Valley so sorry to hear you are going through a Life change, please know that we are here for you, and you are in My thoughts and Prayers. Life can and will be hard, so much more than just benzo tapering. You have always been good to us here, let us know if we can help in any way. 

[[be...]]

  Yea, the group no one wants to be in. 

I may not be in your group, but I stand beside you Free, silently always.

[[...]]

I'm here , just in the same state as Freeme and HS.... Pretty rough and not getting anywhere .

So just checking in here and there to see how everyone's doing .

Feels impossible right now .... But one day at a time ...

 

Valley I am so sorry ... How awful for you . And in the midst of withdrawal .

Hang in in there dear Valley , you are always so kind . ❤️

 

Love , MiYu 

[[be...]]

I'm here , just in the same state as Freeme and HS.... Pretty rough and not getting anywhere .

So just checking in here and there to see how everyone's doing .

Feels impossible right now .... But one day at a time ...

 

Valley I am so sorry ... How awful for you . And in the midst of withdrawal .

Hang in in there dear Valley , you are always so kind . ❤️

 

Love , MiYu 

Hi MiYu, so sorry you are suffering so, so unfair, I wish I knew of something that would help. I was reading here today of someone that has had a really bad time, and she started taking MJ or something like it, and she stated she felt better, first time in a long time. I am not sure how you feel about that, but thought I would mention it. You are always in my thoughts and Prayers. 

[[ly...]]

 

 

Oh V, I am so very sorry.

[[ga...]]

Sorry I’ve been away.  My wife left me this week and having to deal with the fallout.  I’ll check back in when things settle down a bit. Hope all are doing well. —V

 

Oh, Valley, I'm so sorry to hear about this. :'(

Please take care of yourself.

 

Gard  (The available emojis are really letting me down on this one.)

[[fr...]]

  Thanks BG and all others for the good wishes.  Valley, I am so sad for you.  We are here for you.  Hang in there. 

[[...]]

Thank you for all that are putting up with me.....

 

Since the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results is not working fir me......

 

I'm wondering if a liquid micro taper would help me

 

Amy one who is having success with this could please chime in.....I'm sensitive and any change seems to bother me.

 

Tips.......

 

I asked builder for help

 

Would be grateful for your experiences

❤️HS

 

I want to commend on how far you have come! This is not easy at all. I am 63 and it seems harder as I get older. This a big challenge, but can be overcome.

I think the liquid micro taper may be a great option. I was doing the water titration, but the K was not dissolving and I was not getting consistent doses. I ended up getting very symptomatic. I cut my .1mg over 2 months and then sat and took another .025mg off. More symptoms. Finally took my K, crushed and divided it to where I was getting my dose of 1.875mg. I asked Builder to help with a liquid water/Vodka/k titration without wasting the drug. He really helped me,but I have not started yet, due to symptoms. I plan to start very soon. It is worth a try.

I am Praying for you and I know you will get better!  It is hard to stay positive when we are this, but from past experience with a horrid C/T, I know it can be done.

I will keep you posted on my taper when I resume.

God Bless.

 

Thank you for all that are putting up with me.....

 

Since the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results is not working fir me......

 

I'm wondering if a liquid micro taper would help me

 

Amy one who is having success with this could please chime in.....I'm sensitive and any change seems to bother me.

 

Tips.......

 

I asked builder for help

 

Would be grateful for your experiences

❤️HS

 

I want to commend on how far you have come! This is not easy at all. I am 63 and it seems harder as I get older. This a big challenge, but can be overcome.

I think the liquid micro taper may be a great option. I was doing the water titration, but the K was not dissolving and I was not getting consistent doses. I ended up getting very symptomatic. I cut my .1mg over 2 months and then sat and took another .025mg off. More symptoms. Finally took my K, crushed and divided it to where I was getting my dose of 1.875mg. I asked Builder to help with a liquid water/Vodka/k titration without wasting the drug. He really helped me,but I have not started yet, due to symptoms. I plan to start very soon. It is worth a try.

I am Praying for you and I know you will get better!  It is hard to stay positive when we are this, but from past experience with a horrid C/T, I know it can be done.

I will keep you posted on my taper when I resume.

God Bless.

 

dana , I tried vodka and water and found  It didn't really suspend the K . I'm using nut milk now to get my doses even and it's much better for a suspension I find . I don't get the kind of powder deposits around the glass like i did  with the water and vodka . TNTD also uses nut milk fro her K dosing .

 

Love, MiYu

 

Begood I just saw your post , thank you .... I do have CBD oil.... Perhaps I need to use it more . I tried some vape with higher THC and it wasn't good .... I need the high CBD . I'll keep trying . Something s got to work surely ?

Love , MiYu ❤️

 

[[ga...]]

Hi, this last 8 months I have cut in total 30%, would you say that that's a lot ?. I havnt cut for 2 months now as ive decided to go onto a long hold. I hardly feel any better so im wondering if its worth holding any longer. 2yrs 6months ago i was on 30mg of valium, I'm now on 2mgs.Any advice please.  Cheryl xx

 

Cheryl, Your taper rate does not sound too fast. You've made amazing progress, but sometimes our bodies and brains just need break. 

 

Some people feel better as they get lower but some feel worse and need to slow down. I'm not that low, so I don't know what it will be for me, yet.

 

2 months is a bit of a short hold. I took much longer to see improvement. I think it was the same for V and others, too. Hopefully some of them will chime in, too.

 

Gard

[[Ca...]]

Sorry I’ve been away.  My wife left me this week and having to deal with the fallout.  I’ll check back in when things settle down a bit. Hope all are doing well. —V

So so sorry.... :'(

[[an...]]

Sorry I’ve been away.  My wife left me this week and having to deal with the fallout.  I’ll check back in when things settle down a bit. Hope all are doing well. —V

 

Valley, I am so sorry.  Please take good care of yourself.  You are in my thoughts.  We are all here for you. 

 

Anne  :smitten:

[[Se...]]

Sorry I’ve been away.  My wife left me this week and having to deal with the fallout.  I’ll check back in when things settle down a bit. Hope all are doing well. —V

 

 

So sorry To hear that V. 

 

 

[[He...]]

Oh V.,

I am so sad to hear about your situation. My son is in the middle of that as well. He is back in our home for a while. It is so terribly hard. My heart aches for you and him both! . Be strong.

We are all here for you.

 

Heath

[[Be...]]

Cut 7 weeks ago and been in a bad wave for a month now. I took a long hold last year and stabilise brilliant.  I was having really good windows.  Please. Will I stabilise again,feel like I'll never get better from this.

[[He...]]

Valley

I want you to know I am very sad and sorry to hear about your situation.......it must be very hard for you right now.  You have always been here for me and for that I am grateful.  Hoping you weather this storm...you are in my thoughts and prayers.

❤️HS

[[sl...]]

 

Sorry I’ve been away.  My wife left me this week and having to deal with the fallout.  I’ll check back in when things settle down a bit. Hope all are doing well. —V

 

Valley, I am so sorry,  I've had a similar situation as you know.

You will be ok but it's hard, I know.

Thank you for all the help you gave me.

I'm in India on holiday atm but popped in to BG's blog to report for duty and saw this.

Take care.

I'm so sorry  - my best wishes and thoughts are with you