The Long Hold Support Group

[[...]]

I'm not asking for advice .... just your experiences.  I've been cutting less than 5% every two weeks... the last cut was 3 weeks ago and the one before that was 3 weeks.

 

I've had buddies tell me that holds don't work for them. 

 

I am very symptomatic.... but I was also very symptomatic before I started as I was in tolerance.  The drugs are not controlling my anxiety and they are messing up my sleep.

 

So I'm really in a quandary

 

Healing ...I too am sorry your post got lost in the shuffle ..... Gard is right on about us staying focused in what this support group is about , thank you Lynn and Gard.

 

So my experience ... I am having I believe a difficult taper comparitively speaking , for someone who is going very slowly ..... This is perhaps because I have never really reached stability , I don't know . I " held" for 8 months , but during that time I cut 1/4 mg Valium , and also some of my gabapentin . So I don't know that I can really call it a true hold .

I tried agin in June to cut back , 1/16 th mg Valium , a small amount microtapered . July was really hard with bad WDs , and unfortunately they continue to build it seems . So that was only 1% reduction  , or less!

 

I get pretty depressed about what feels like my lack of progress , but this group has been a life saver for me , and it always feels right to me when I read about long holds to stabilize . All we can really do is try it out and see.

So now I am going to try another long hold , and this time I hope to have the patience to make it a true hold , no changes to either my Valium or gabapentin .

 

I will say that , although I never got to the point of felling well during those eight months , it did make a difference and I did become  more stable . I can't say anything negative about it , except  that it's hard to hold and not know what the results will be .

What has been fully drummed into my brain here is that , cutting when unstable is a recipe for disaster and certainly in my limited experience , I do get worse .

I started out too fast in my taper ,and  in some ways have never recovered , not yet anyway.

 

I keep hope and faith that I will be ok .

Have you read Valleyums " propaganda" list of quotes advocating long holds and their benefits ?

 

All the best to you , if ever your posts get missed again , don't hesitate to repost, it's a good group and they will always help support you,

MiYu

[[...]]

I guess I also need to add while this group has been doing this and has been successful.....this is such totally new information for me....and very contrary to what everyone including docs and buddies have been telling me.  One of my former docs told me to rip the bandaid off.....that I wasn't on that much.

I'm suffering and struggling and I need to make my decision. 

 

Thank you for your kindness.....it really is confusing

 

Healing......I get the thing about new information ..... I was Ashton brainwashed and it got me in trouble . I was so fortunate to find this group and I STILL fall into the gotta get off quick mindset.... But everytime I come here , my gut says ' this feels right ". So as much as we can ' trust out guts' in this mind bending process , I think it's all we really have .....

MiYu

[[Ca...]]

I guess I also need to add while this group has been doing this and has been successful.....this is such totally new information for me....and very contrary to what everyone including docs and buddies have been telling me.  One of my former docs told me to rip the bandaid off.....that I wasn't on that much.

I'm suffering and struggling and I need to make my decision. 

 

Thank you for your kindness.....it really is confusing

yup, im still back here..!!

 

This makes the point... -Holding does go against the grain...

The logic was simple for me... But the practice, -not so much... As you all know..

 

So it opens up a load more questions about when and how to present the Holding info...

 

Do we push/volenteer/whisper it on the boards, or wait till people suffer enough to be "looking" for the Long Hold, updose or micro Groups..??

 

Some people (like me) tend to need to hear things, go and digest, then return for more info...

Im not sure an orange sticky could do that so well...

 

Just thoughts...

 

[[...]]

I'm also down fro the chit chat and some times I come here feeling really crappy and read some very funny posts that cheer me up !

 

I love everything about this group! It's unique I think in the whole benzo support online world . I feel very graced to have been attracted to it , despite my fears of holding and having to undo all that mindset , which , I still have, but it's more like background noise now....

MiYu

 

[[ly...]]

I guess I also need to add while this group has been doing this and has been successful.....this is such totally new information for me....and very contrary to what everyone including docs and buddies have been telling me.  One of my former docs told me to rip the bandaid off.....that I wasn't on that much.

I'm suffering and struggling and I need to make my decision. 

 

Thank you for your kindness.....it really is confusing

 

Healing,

 

There is a definite bias on BB toward following Ashton.  This is understandable because it's about the only direction out there for tapering off of benzos.  It's often cited that Ashton said do not hold more than 2(?) weeks (one month??).  Here, she didn't allow long holds and would have no way of knowing of any benefit.  And I don't think she followed patients for long enough to evaluate the possibility of protracted.  Protracted is what I wanted to avoid.  I thought that keeping sxs low would keep damage and the need for healing low.  I didn't think sxs would escalate dramatically once off.  So for me, low sxs/mild taper meant mild post-taper.  Of course, I'm not a doctor or scientist but I just felt that this would give me the best chance of avoiding Hell on earth and lengthy sickness.  I also wanted to feel well while I tapered.  I needed to get better before I could accomplish a mild taper - so I held until I felt well.  And it took 8 months.

 

I'm also very glad that I did not cross to V, as is Ashton protocol.  When I first came here and started reading I planned to do just that.  Hearing of the depression many face with V made me decide to stick with xanax until it became impossible.  It never became impossible.  I've come to an unscientific conclusion that it is best to taper your original benzo whenever possible.  You just don't know how you will react to something different and I think it can cause chaos in the brain - or at least complicate matters.  Again, none of my thoughts are any type of "science" but merely the conclusions I came to after reading and thinking.

 

But, yes, Ashton rules as far as what most believe to be the correct method of tapering.  It may be for some and might not be for others.  It wasn't for me.

[[...]]

I guess I also need to add while this group has been doing this and has been successful.....this is such totally new information for me....and very contrary to what everyone including docs and buddies have been telling me.  One of my former docs told me to rip the bandaid off.....that I wasn't on that much.

I'm suffering and struggling and I need to make my decision. 

 

Thank you for your kindness.....it really is confusing

yup, im still back here..!!

 

This makes the point... -Holding does go against the grain...

The logic was simple for me... But the practice, -not so much... As you all know..

 

So it opens up a load more questions about when and how to present the Holding info...

 

Do we push/volenteer/whisper it on the boards, or wait till people suffer enough to be "looking" for the Long Hold, updose or micro Groups..??

 

Some people (like me) tend to need to hear things, go and digest, then return for more info...

Im not sure an orange sticky could do that so well...

 

Just thoughts...

 

Cant..... I thought it was time for you to get some zzz's! 

 

I think there's an element of , when someone's ready and open to the possibility of holding , they will find the group . If they don't like whatvtheybread , or aren't ready , they leave pretty quick.

 

I RNK that's how it happened for me .... I saw the " long hold support group" and the very first Post by oscar hooked me enough for me to keep coming back ......

[[ca...]]

Sorry i have been just reading and not being supportive in a long bit lots going on. I started my taper 2 1/2 years ago from 4 mgs Klonopin doing a partial C/O to Valium and in the first couple of months ended up dropping basically 2 mgs K because the equivalence i was given was wrong so i am still trying to reel things in, yes the whole holding bit is frowned on in just about all benzo groups. The point i am trying to make is i have seen the gates of hell in this taper and by holding it has kept me functional  if you can call it that and i dare not jump off the cliff as being so very close many times holding is my saving grace will it work honestly i don`t know but if i was to follow most i would have been of the cliff by now ! I need to say thank you to so many on this thread ~CD

[[ga...]]

 

...I will say that , although I never got to the point of felling well during those eight months , it did make a difference and I did become  more stable . I can't say anything negative about it , except  that it's hard to hold and not know what the results will be .

What has been fully drummed into my brain here is that , cutting when unstable is a recipe for disaster and certainly in my limited experience , I do get worse .

I started out too fast in my taper ,and  in some ways have never recovered , not yet anyway.

 

I keep hope and faith that I will be ok .

Have you read Valleyums " propaganda" list of quotes advocating long holds and their benefits ?

 

All the best to you , if ever your posts get missed again , don't hesitate to repost, it's a good group and they will always help support you,

MiYu

 

You hit the nail own the head, Miyu.  Nobody knows what the results will be. That's what makes it so hard to hold. And the benzos chatter in our brains and make us feel we need to rush. That does not help. I still hear the benzo brain chatter. Luckily I have my daughter reminding me how holding has helped me.

 

I'm very glad to hear you saw some improvement during your mostly-hold. You've been so symptomatic for so long. You deserve some relief. Hoping this full hold will bring it.

Gard

[[ga...]]

I guess I also need to add while this group has been doing this and has been successful.....this is such totally new information for me....and very contrary to what everyone including docs and buddies have been telling me.  One of my former docs told me to rip the bandaid off.....that I wasn't on that much.

I'm suffering and struggling and I need to make my decision. 

 

Thank you for your kindness.....it really is confusing

 

Healing,

 

There is a definite bias on BB toward following Ashton.  This is understandable because it's about the only direction out there for tapering off of benzos.  It's often cited that Ashton said do not hold more than 2(?) weeks (one month??).  Here, she didn't allow long holds and would have no way of knowing of any benefit.  And I don't think she followed patients for long enough to evaluate the possibility of protracted.  Protracted is what I wanted to avoid.  I thought that keeping sxs low would keep damage and the need for healing low.  I didn't think sxs would escalate dramatically once off.  So for me, low sxs/mild taper meant mild post-taper.  Of course, I'm not a doctor or scientist but I just felt that this would give me the best chance of avoiding Hell on earth and lengthy sickness.  I also wanted to feel well while I tapered.  I needed to get better before I could accomplish a mild taper - so I held until I felt well.  And it took 8 months.

 

I'm also very glad that I did not cross to V, as is Ashton protocol.  When I first came here and started reading I planned to do just that.  Hearing of the depression many face with V made me decide to stick with xanax until it became impossible.  It never became impossible.  I've come to an unscientific conclusion that it is best to taper your original benzo whenever possible.  You just don't know how you will react to something different and I think it can cause chaos in the brain - or at least complicate matters.  Again, none of my thoughts are any type of "science" but merely the conclusions I came to after reading and thinking.

 

But, yes, Ashton rules as far as what most believe to be the correct method of tapering.  It may be for some and might not be for others.  It wasn't for me.

 

lynn, I strongly suspect you are right about the crossover. I often wonder if my original doctor hadn't pushed me, if I would have stopped and held after the first crash, maybe I could have tapered straight off the Xanax. Shipko wrote Xanax Withdrawal and appears to have tapered all of his patients straight off of Xanax. He has not followed Ashton and, while he respects her, also critiques some of her methodology.

 

We have learned a lot since Ashton, but it seems to be mostly anecdotal and peer-sharing. Suffering people naturally want to go back to the "expert." They look to Ashton, hoping she is going to be the one to alleviate their suffering. Sadly, this is not always the case. Rigidly following one person's rules, if they don't work for you, only adds to your misery. 

 

I consider myself very fortunate that I did not have an adverse reaction to Librium (except the typical depression) and was able to continue my taper from it after stabilizing. I agree, best not to cross if you don't have to. So many others have not been so fortunate after they crossed. Be it the drug or be it the crossing self, they have ended up in and state.

 

Again, lynn, thank you for sharing your experience. I think peer-sharing is HUGE in getting people safely off of benzos.

 

Gard

[[ga...]]

Sorry i have been just reading and not being supportive in a long bit lots going on. I started my taper 2 1/2 years ago from 4 mgs Klonopin doing a partial C/O to Valium and in the first couple of months ended up dropping basically 2 mgs K because the equivalence i was given was wrong so i am still trying to reel things in, yes the whole holding bit is frowned on in just about all benzo groups. The point i am trying to make is i have seen the gates of hell in this taper and by holding it has kept me functional  if you can call it that and i dare not jump off the cliff as being so very close many times holding is my saving grace will it work honestly i don`t know but if i was to follow most i would have been of the cliff by now ! I need to say thank you to so many on this thread ~CD

 

Very good to see you, can do! 

[[ga...]]

I confess I am ignorant of the FB group. Maybe that's a good thing?

 

I'm sorry to hear about people being bitten on the other threads when they try to help. Sometimes it's the wild, wild west out there. But even if someone bites you, someone else might just be listening and learning quietly. You might have saved someone without knowing it. We let in many members who only read and never post. So to those who are brave enough to wade into the fray, I applaud you! You are doing an important job in defeating the benzo beast.

 

Gard

[[Ca...]]

I guess I also need to add while this group has been doing this and has been successful.....this is such totally new information for me....and very contrary to what everyone including docs and buddies have been telling me.  One of my former docs told me to rip the bandaid off.....that I wasn't on that much.

I'm suffering and struggling and I need to make my decision. 

 

Thank you for your kindness.....it really is confusing

yup, im still back here..!!

 

This makes the point... -Holding does go against the grain...

The logic was simple for me... But the practice, -not so much... As you all know..

 

So it opens up a load more questions about when and how to present the Holding info...

 

Do we push/volenteer/whisper it on the boards, or wait till people suffer enough to be "looking" for the Long Hold, updose or micro Groups..??

 

Some people (like me) tend to need to hear things, go and digest, then return for more info...

Im not sure an orange sticky could do that so well...

 

Just thoughts...

 

Cant..... I thought it was time for you to get some zzz's! 

 

I think there's an element of , when someone's ready and open to the possibility of holding , they will find the group . If they don't like whatvtheybread , or aren't ready , they leave pretty quick.

 

I RNK that's how it happened for me .... I saw the " long hold support group" and the very first Post by oscar hooked me enough for me to keep coming back ......

Hey MIYu... I think your right, and thats logical...

 

But the problem becomes that I (and I guess Lynn) were on the WD support board earlier, and there were lots of posts for help by new members that are going unanswered...

Im not sure new members with 2 -3 posts, that go unanswered will stay long enough to even hear the word hold... Then members with 5-6 posts are saying they heard its best to...??

-you know the story...

 

Then we jump in and very politley mention the word hold, or slow, etc... and just get ignored, or worse...

 

A flow of info problem, and probably age old...

 

Valleys FB thoughts make sense...

 

Anyways....  You are soooo correct... -it is sleep time...

 

Be well everyone,

 

Hey CD, saw your songs posted, was hoping you were surfacing...

 

[[ca...]]

Sorry i have been just reading and not being supportive in a long bit lots going on. I started my taper 2 1/2 years ago from 4 mgs Klonopin doing a partial C/O to Valium and in the first couple of months ended up dropping basically 2 mgs K because the equivalence i was given was wrong so i am still trying to reel things in, yes the whole holding bit is frowned on in just about all benzo groups. The point i am trying to make is i have seen the gates of hell in this taper and by holding it has kept me functional  if you can call it that and i dare not jump off the cliff as being so very close many times holding is my saving grace will it work honestly i don`t know but if i was to follow most i would have been of the cliff by now ! I need to say thank you to so many on this thread ~CD

 

Very good to see you, can do! 

Gard, thank you and yes i crashed hard as you can see from the crazy start of my taper was almost a CT and just kept following the Aston % how i made it thru some days i will never know. Like you just stated we are so all very different and looking around researching different taper options etc. is the best chance for a good outcome and if i had to do over i would have never done a C/O to valium and i do tell people it may be a bad move but then again it may work great so just like everything in this ordeal sharing and educating ones self is the key. Be well ~ CD

[[Ca...]]

I confess I am ignorant of the FB group. Maybe that's a good thing?

 

I'm sorry to hear about people being bitten on the other threads when they try to help. Sometimes it's the wild, wild west out there. But even if someone bites you, someone else might just be listening and learning quietly. You might have saved someone without knowing it. We let in many members who only read and never post. So to those who are brave enough to wade into the fray, I applaud you! You are doing an important job in defeating the benzo beast.

 

Gard

lol, I dont mind getting bitten so much, cos I know Im fine with what I know...

But its the damn waste of texting..!!!

If I were typing, I wouldnt be half as bothered...!!!

Yup... -lazy...

[[Su...]]

Hi all,

I wanted to chime in even though I haven't done a long hold -- yet.  It's in my back pocket though, as something that I will definitely do when the need arises, not I sure didn't say if...

 

This thread with the informative and chatty banter is a life saver for me!   And many on the thread have been super helpful to me on other threads.  DLMT disaster for one thing.  (Didn't throw out the baby with the bathwater on that one as my sig shows.)

 

But one of the most helpful things has been knowing there is another way than simply pushing through!!

 

My holds have been short at this time, 1-4 days, but already I can see the benefit of doing so and how the body "catches up" I too am not interested in being completely non-functional or having protracted sxs and the wisdom of this thread has given me lots to work with

 

Thanks for being here, for venturing out onto other less supportive threads, and for generally putting your neck out about something other than Ashton.

We really need more research onto this whole thing don't we?!?!

 

Solid peer reviewed research including Long Holds as a method that needs to be part of the package of Benzo w/d.

 

While Ashton was an intrepid pioneer, and my hat is off to her with the changes made to treatment protocol because of her research, it's pretty old info right now.

 

anyway that's my way of saying thanks you guys!   you rock!

I'm so glad I found this thread........ so glad...... don't know where I'd be without it 

[[Va...]]

Hi all,

I wanted to chime in even though I haven't done a long hold -- yet.  It's in my back pocket though, as something that I will definitely do when the need arises, not I sure didn't say if...

 

This thread with the informative and chatty banter is a life saver for me!   And many on the thread have been super helpful to me on other threads.  DLMT disaster for one thing.  :sick: (Didn't throw out the baby with the bathwater on that one as my sig shows.)

 

But one of the most helpful things has been knowing there is another way than simply pushing through!!

 

My holds have been short at this time, 1-4 days, but already I can see the benefit of doing so and how the body "catches up" I too am not interested in being completely non-functional or having protracted sxs and the wisdom of this thread has given me lots to work with

 

Thanks for being here, for venturing out onto other less supportive threads, and for generally putting your neck out about something other than Ashton.

We really need more research onto this whole thing don't we?!?!

 

Solid peer reviewed research including Long Holds as a method that needs to be part of the package of Benzo w/d.

 

While Ashton was an intrepid pioneer, and my hat is off to her with the changes made to treatment protocol because of her research, it's pretty old info right now.

 

anyway that's my way of saying thanks you guys!   you rock!

I'm so glad I found this thread........ so glad...... don't know where I'd be without it  :smitten:

We're glad you're here! 

[[He...]]

Hi all...and I'm finding you are a wonderful group.....

I have spent the better part of the afternoon rereading the propaganda.and really thinking about my experience......which has sucked.  I started out my taper with  much fear.....I had read all the horror stories and was doomed before I started.....but I was feeling really unwell on these drugs so I agreed.

 

I had a p doc tell me I would fail.....and I guess that got into my brain....but being feisty.....I said to myself....I'll show him.  Right now he is right....I am failing. My husband is at the beach and I am home alone feeling extremely anxious.....was suppose to cut tomorrow.....last Monday I couldn't walk around without holding onto the walls.......this doesn't make any sense to me.  For a time I gave up visiting BB.  IT SCARED THE #^*+ OUT OF ME..... I read all of Jennifer Leigh's years and years of woe which scared me even further.

 

I'm going to try this approach. But of course I have questions......you'll just have to get use to my questions.....sometimes endless.

 

How do you make the panic go away.....and if your gaba receptors are downregulated then how does holding help?  And I have a terrible time sleeping....I awaken in panic every night multiple times.....maybe that's enough questions for now....I don't want to overwhelm you....andI love to chit chat.....I don't know a thing about chickens though😉

 

Thank you all for your kindness.....this is just a different spin for  me. It takes getting used to.

 

 

 

[[ca...]]

  HS " Quote ~ (If your gaba receptors are downregulated then how does holding help?)  It hopefully allows your CNS to repair instead of further downregulating make sense ?

[[...]]

I guess I also need to add while this group has been doing this and has been successful.....this is such totally new information for me....and very contrary to what everyone including docs and buddies have been telling me.  One of my former docs told me to rip the bandaid off.....that I wasn't on that much.

I'm suffering and struggling and I need to make my decision. 

 

Thank you for your kindness.....it really is confusing

yup, im still back here..!!

 

This makes the point... -Holding does go against the grain...

The logic was simple for me... But the practice, -not so much... As you all know..

 

So it opens up a load more questions about when and how to present the Holding info...

 

Do we push/volenteer/whisper it on the boards, or wait till people suffer enough to be "looking" for the Long Hold, updose or micro Groups..??

 

Some people (like me) tend to need to hear things, go and digest, then return for more info...

Im not sure an orange sticky could do that so well...

 

Just thoughts...

 

Cant..... I thought it was time for you to get some zzz's! 

 

I think there's an element of , when someone's ready and open to the possibility of holding , they will find the group . If they don't like whatvtheybread , or aren't ready , they leave pretty quick.

 

I RNK that's how it happened for me .... I saw the " long hold support group" and the very first Post by oscar hooked me enough for me to keep coming back ......

Hey MIYu... I think your right, and thats logical...

 

But the problem becomes that I (and I guess Lynn) were on the WD support board earlier, and there were lots of posts for help by new members that are going unanswered...

Im not sure new members with 2 -3 posts, that go unanswered will stay long enough to even hear the word hold... Then members with 5-6 posts are saying they heard its best to...??

-you know the story...

 

Then we jump in and very politley mention the word hold, or slow, etc... and just get ignored, or worse...

 

A flow of info problem, and probably age old...

 

Valleys FB thoughts make sense...

 

Anyways....  You are soooo correct... -it is sleep time...

 

Be well everyone,

 

Hey CD, saw your songs posted, was hoping you were surfacing...

 

Hoping you are soundly in the land of nod for now Cant.......

I came to BB a few times and found it very hard to navigate at first , too overwhelming . And I also posted in a few groups and got no response . So I settled with FB for a while , then I think in a time of desperation I came back to BB and found the LHSG ...... And had a whole different experience .....now this is my main support place , aside from a couple of good people I met on FB .

There are several FB groups , each with different ' clientele '. There is one that is very supportive with good administrators , that tends more towards just supporting people in whatever personal decisions they make rather than having a method to preach . Called benzodiazapine withdrawal support and recovery I think. The other groups I found are more of the get off quick orientation .

 

Well said Gard on " some people are just watching and learning quietly, " you never know who you might have touched and helped with posting about long holds as a method of WD .

 

I kinda wish I hadn't crossed to Valium as I've had nothing but trouble , maybe not from the Valium per se, I don't know , but what I do know is the actual cross was like a full blown WD from K . So In a way I think fro me it's been like reinstating with a different benzo . And I haven't stabilized .....not sure what if anything I can do about that . I suppose I have to try the long hold again and maybe my brain is still recovering from the K , K walloped me pretty hard the two months I was on it . I'm not sure I would have had an easy taper of that either . Had I stuck with Ativan only I may have had an easier time , but it's too late now! Can't turn back the clock .

Ha , interestingly I'm watching the "Curious Case of Benjamin Button" , perhaps we can turn back the clock...... Slowly......

 

Love , MiYu ,  :hug:

 

 

 

 

[[an...]]

Hi all...and I'm finding you are a wonderful group.....

I have spent the better part of the afternoon rereading the propaganda.and really thinking about my experience......which has sucked.  I started out my taper with  much fear.....I had read all the horror stories and was doomed before I started.....but I was feeling really unwell on these drugs so I agreed.

 

I had a p doc tell me I would fail.....and I guess that got into my brain....but being feisty.....I said to myself....I'll show him.  Right now he is right....I am failing. My husband is at the beach and I am home alone feeling extremely anxious.....was suppose to cut tomorrow.....last Monday I couldn't walk around without holding onto the walls.......this doesn't make any sense to me.  For a time I gave up visiting BB.  IT SCARED THE #^*+ OUT OF ME..... I read all of Jennifer Leigh's years and years of woe which scared me even further.

 

I'm going to try this approach. But of course I have questions......you'll just have to get use to my questions.....sometimes endless.

 

How do you make the panic go away.....and if your gaba receptors are downregulated then how does holding help?  And I have a terrible time sleeping....I awaken in panic every night multiple times.....maybe that's enough questions for now....I don't want to overwhelm you....andI love to chit chat.....I don't know a thing about chickens though😉

 

Thank you all for your kindness.....this is just a different spin for  me. It takes getting used to.

 

Hi Healing,

 

Think about the last time when you were functional and feeling well.  Last year, I got hit with some very intense symptoms that just came out of the blue.  Things were getting worse rather than better.  I think all of the previous cuts had caught up with me.  I was cutting about 10% every two weeks.  It was a tough decision to make, but I increased my dose to the previous dosage where I felt good--it was about a 25% increase.  I take Ativan, and usually, I can feel the improvement right away, and of course, I didn't.  It took a few days, but I finally started to feel better and after a few months I was able to resume my taper.  For me, the up dose was a good decision.

 

Several months later, I was still doing well with my taper, but my husband had to have major surgery.  That set me back to where I was before the up dose. I had a lot of BP spikes, anxiety, off balance, etc.  I up dosed again to get through the next several months.  I held for quite some time and then back in May, I had to have an emergency appendectomy--more stress.  But, I held for a while, and now I am back to cutting about 5 -  6% a month.  Decreasing my taper rate made a huge difference.  As I said in a previous post, I now feel that I will finish this taper and walk off in about a year's time.  In another month, I will be back to the dose I was at before I up dosed back in June 2015.

 

For me, the up doses and the holds have made all of the difference.  I am finally in a place where I can taper and be comfortable and live my life.  A lot of people on the forum do not like to hear about up doses.  Many are against it, but the two up doses over the last 14 months have helped me tremendously.  I think I would have had a stroke without them.  I tend to get very high BP spikes, so I have to be very careful.

 

I remember someone on another thread stating that we have three choices--just push through and suffer, hold, or make a dose correction.  I chose the latter two, and for me it worked.  It might not work for everyone, but I think we have to give a good long hold (with or without a dose correction) a chance.  I almost didn't because my first taper was so successful, and I was tapering 20% a month with no issues.  The second time around has been very different, but after two years,  I think I am finally on the right track.  It feels good.

 

Anyway, just some things to think about.

 

Good luck.

Anne

 

 

[[...]]

Hi all...and I'm finding you are a wonderful group.....

I have spent the better part of the afternoon rereading the propaganda.and really thinking about my experience......which has sucked.  I started out my taper with  much fear.....I had read all the horror stories and was doomed before I started.....but I was feeling really unwell on these drugs so I agreed.

 

I had a p doc tell me I would fail.....and I guess that got into my brain....but being feisty.....I said to myself....I'll show him.  Right now he is right....I am failing. My husband is at the beach and I am home alone feeling extremely anxious.....was suppose to cut tomorrow.....last Monday I couldn't walk around without holding onto the walls.......this doesn't make any sense to me.  For a time I gave up visiting BB.  IT SCARED THE #^*+ OUT OF ME..... I read all of Jennifer Leigh's years and years of woe which scared me even further.

 

I'm going to try this approach. But of course I have questions......you'll just have to get use to my questions.....sometimes endless.

 

How do you make the panic go away.....and if your gaba receptors are downregulated then how does holding help?  And I have a terrible time sleeping....I awaken in panic every night multiple times.....maybe that's enough questions for now....I don't want to overwhelm you....andI love to chit chat.....I don't know a thing about chickens though😉

 

Thank you all for your kindness.....this is just a different spin for  me. It takes getting used to.

 

HI HS ,

I can't pretend to know the answers to all your questions , but , it looks to me that you have made some significant reductions , and so your GABA receptors aren't going to be further down regulating , more like they'd be " catching up " to account for the fact that you have less of the drug going to your brain , so holding is just allowing that to happen .

Of course this is speculation , but I'm pretty sure that as soon as we start to reduce , further down regulation would stop and actually up regulation would occur , until we reach homeostasis at the lower dose .

I do think there's a whole more to it than just receptors personally , we're just all out of whack and it takes time . So I guess what I'm trying to say is , holding gives our bodies a chance to regroup and prepare for a further reduction , without making things worse by cutting more .

 

Make sense ? I know fro myself there's the emotional component , I have to feel ready to cut , and also , if I'm suffering a lot, which I am at the moment  , cutting definitely makes things worse . This process for me has been quite debilitating , and to further reduce my Valium now would just make me more disabled .

Really , we can only know by trying something out , that's where I've come to , I can only suffer so much , and so I am trying holding again after my last small reduction .

 

Hope this helps a bit.  And I don't think anyone minds lots of questions 

Love, MiYu

[[Va...]]

                                      http://i.quoteaddicts.com/media/q1/465098.png

[[He...]]

Well ok then

[[Va...]]

Well ok then

Lol. It wasnt directed at you specifically.  --V

[[ga...]]

 

Hey MIYu... I think your right, and thats logical...

 

But the problem becomes that I (and I guess Lynn) were on the WD support board earlier, and there were lots of posts for help by new members that are going unanswered...

Im not sure new members with 2 -3 posts, that go unanswered will stay long enough to even hear the word hold... Then members with 5-6 posts are saying they heard its best to...??

-you know the story...

 

Then we jump in and very politley mention the word hold, or slow, etc... and just get ignored, or worse...

 

A flow of info problem, and probably age old...

 

Valleys FB thoughts make sense...

 

Anyways....  You are soooo correct... -it is sleep time...

 

Be well everyone,

 

Hey CD, saw your songs posted, was hoping you were surfacing...

 

Cant, I have seen you be the hero of the boards, sometimes the only polite, sensible post in an entire thread. And I've seen your sensible posts seemingly ignored. But I still think people are reading them and learning even if other, bigger mouths are getting more attention.

 

Gard