The Long Hold Support Group

[[He...]]

 

 

"Heath,

Day 12, always a tricky time for me too. Hope you sail through it and all the rest of the days with little or no uptick in sxs.

 

I doing well except for that floaty boaty sensation not quite dizzy but still a bit floaty if you know what I mean."

 

 

Hi ATU,

Yes I sure do know what that floaty boaty sensation is. It comes to me infrequently but often enough to stick out in my mind. I hate it, mainly because I don't know if it is going to turn into a full blown dizzy attack or go away in a short while. But yes it is very unsettling!

 

Hope you are feeling better as the day goes on.

And now my" hand pain" is back. Oh yes, days 10 to 15 are really unpredictable

 

Heath

 

 

 

ATU 🙏🏻

[[ga...]]

Hello, thread.  Just skimming so as not to get lost. I have been up to my ears with learning the ropes of the forum. Everything is starting to just blur together. Holy mackerel. Who'd have thought there was so much technical stuff behind this software!   I think Colin should be knighted or something.

 

But even when our days are a blur, we are one day closer to freedom! 

 

Gard

[[ly...]]

 

 

Gard,

 

I am quite impressed with your diligent work on the boards!

[[Va...]]

Hello, thread.  Just skimming so as not to get lost. I have been up to my ears with learning the ropes of the forum. Everything is starting to just blur together. Holy mackerel. Who'd have thought there was so much technical stuff behind this software!   I think Colin should be knighted or something.

 

But even when our days are a blur, we are one day closer to freedom! 

 

Gard

Sounds like you've definitely got a distraction. Do they allow "sloth mode" lol. 

[[ga...]]

Thanks, Lynn.

V, actually, yes, I can switch to sloth any time I want, thank heavens!

[[Ca...]]

Cantfly,

 

I know how annoying and nerve racking it can be to have these disturbances going on around you especially when your in such a sensative state. Lets hope your neighbour starts thinking about his neighbours soon.

 

Hope your feeling better as well and in time I know you will.

 

Heath,

Day 12, always a tricky time for me too. Hope you sail through it and all the rest of the days with little or no uptick in sxs.

 

I doing well except for that floaty boaty sensation not quite dizzy but still a bit floaty if you know what I mean.

 

Peace, healing and windows to everyone!

 

ATU 🙏🏻

Thanks ATU, Im all good, I dont have any neighbours... Nova has a particularly nasty/noisy one though...

 

Hope you are doing ok yourself...?

 

Day 11 is when I tend to get hit hard...

 

Can't,

 

Yes, my mistake,......I looked back over the threads and I see I meant that for Nova1.

 

Thanks.

 

May I ask you as I see you are at a low dose,... how are you finding it??

 

Stay well, your mind is clearly at least working better than mine. 

 

ATU 🙏🏻

Im probably not the best to ask... -I havnt had a progressive reduction taper, and my last cut was big...

Things have changed to more mental SX for me, and dont underestimate the power of tiny doses... this stuff is strong, with hooks that hang on to the last...

no wonder that those that jump early or push through SX get bitten...!!

 

Im glad I took the time to understand my whole medical situation as best I could before getting too low... no more "experimenting" from here... -SLOW...

One can never say for sure, but I can see myself taking 8-12 months from here...??

 

But I wouldnt say low is worse or harder at all... probably just more critical to get it right...

 

That 1V 50% cut last month, used up all my saved credits from 6 months holding...

-in other words, I feel like I did at xmas in many ways, but I seem to be healing much quicker..

-see what happens over the next few weeks...

 

So, simply put, I would suggest to, -Get the last bit right... slow, minimal SX based taper, hold as needed... -stick to what we have learnt here, trust in what we know...

-keep the propaganda list handy...

Sorry ATU, this ended up a bit of a blog...

-Thats my fried brain...

 

[[no...]]

Hello my fellow L.H Warriors    Well the dreaded dental pain got me on top of everything else  yesterday and today but was intermittent, as  as it was, it wasn't much consolation but a relief it was a withdrawal symptom, not a Dentist required job. That one of my paranoia's as there's no way I could get to a dentist at all with the best will in the  world or a gun to my head right now.

 

I'll tell you what it comes to something when you're praying your awful pain IS withdrawal, instead of praying for it to go away first, that came second. It's also more proof I need to keep holding as it's definitely sign of a very unstable CNS, the last time I had dental pain was from CUTTING, and this did exactly the same it moved around different teeth at different times.

 

Funnily enough I've had old symptoms cropping up from when my crash first happened 2 years' ago on top of the long-standing ones, so its looking like my body has gone to continue repairing what it wasn't able to as I continued cutting instead of stopping when symptoms first showed up in a less disabling form. I am also hoping this shit show cascade of symptoms flare-ups is the storm that precedes a window  I hope everyone is doing as okay as possible with whatever circumstances the day has bought

 

 

 

http://theemergencesite.com/Images/HealingSpirals.jpghttp://theemergencesite.com/Images/HealingSpirals.jpg

 

 

 

 

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

[[ga...]]

This is great, Nova!

 

http://theemergencesite.com/Images/HealingSpirals.jpg

[[Th...]]

Hi CF  sorry your feeling rough too  Man! I am having a terrible time, as usual disturb by f-in neighbour whose been play a PC game non-stop since yesterday, and a wave so bad It feels like I've done a massive CT, the temptation to take  a big up dose to make it go away is unreal, and so is the temptation to bloody kill said neighbour. 

 

(It sounds like someone using my walls to do bloody archery here!!! And this happens time and time again, I am so praying to bloody stabilized so I can move the hell away from here, a few days ago when I felt a bit better the same scenario pissed me off a bit but didn't really get to me or spoil my day. Today I feel so ill and lack of proper sleep, which isn't great due to not being  even when its quiet here, when the dick was away for a few day's I found it hard  to get any sleep then. But that noise is driving me crazy on top of feeling the way I feel. AARRGGHH!!!!!!  :D Now the guy over the road is hammering away doing some work in his home!! ##!"£%^(?@!!

 

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

 

I know the feeling. In our old place we had neighbors from India and they would cook all day long. My worst symptom was nausea and the garlic and onions killed me! My DH couldn't even smell it but I could smell it through the firewall.

[[Al...]]

Cantfly,

 

I know how annoying and nerve racking it can be to have these disturbances going on around you especially when your in such a sensative state. Lets hope your neighbour starts thinking about his neighbours soon.

 

Hope your feeling better as well and in time I know you will.

 

Heath,

Day 12, always a tricky time for me too. Hope you sail through it and all the rest of the days with little or no uptick in sxs.

 

I doing well except for that floaty boaty sensation not quite dizzy but still a bit floaty if you know what I mean.

 

Peace, healing and windows to everyone!

 

ATU 🙏🏻

Thanks ATU, Im all good, I dont have any neighbours... Nova has a particularly nasty/noisy one though...

 

Hope you are doing ok yourself...?

 

Day 11 is when I tend to get hit hard...

 

Can't,

 

Yes, my mistake,......I looked back over the threads and I see I meant that for Nova1.

 

Thanks.

 

May I ask you as I see you are at a low dose,... how are you finding it??

 

Stay well, your mind is clearly at least working better than mine. 

 

ATU 🙏🏻

Im probably not the best to ask... -I havnt had a progressive reduction taper, and my last cut was big...

Things have changed to more mental SX for me, and dont underestimate the power of tiny doses... this stuff is strong, with hooks that hang on to the last...

no wonder that those that jump early or push through SX get bitten...!!

 

Im glad I took the time to understand my whole medical situation as best I could before getting too low... no more "experimenting" from here... -SLOW...

One can never say for sure, but I can see myself taking 8-12 months from here...??

 

But I wouldnt say low is worse or harder at all... probably just more critical to get it right...

 

That 1V 50% cut last month, used up all my saved credits from 6 months holding...

-in other words, I feel like I did at xmas in many ways, but I seem to be healing much quicker..

-see what happens over the next few weeks...

 

So, simply put, I would suggest to, -Get the last bit right... slow, minimal SX based taper, hold as needed... -stick to what we have learnt here, trust in what we know...

-keep the propaganda list handy...

Sorry ATU, this ended up a bit of a blog...

-Thats my fried brain...

 

Can't,

 

Thanks for the reply. I feel like I am failing continuing to hold but I know my body just isn't quite ready yet. It's a conundrum for sure. I will give it another week then see how I feel.

 

Thanks for sharing your wisdom, and hope you are feeling much better soon.

 

 

ATU 🙏🏻

[[no...]]

Cantfly,

 

I know how annoying and nerve racking it can be to have these disturbances going on around you especially when your in such a sensative state. Lets hope your neighbour starts thinking about his neighbours soon.

 

Hope your feeling better as well and in time I know you will.

 

Heath,

Day 12, always a tricky time for me too. Hope you sail through it and all the rest of the days with little or no uptick in sxs.

 

I doing well except for that floaty boaty sensation not quite dizzy but still a bit floaty if you know what I mean.

 

Peace, healing and windows to everyone!

 

ATU 🙏🏻

Thanks ATU, Im all good, I dont have any neighbours... Nova has a particularly nasty/noisy one though...

 

Hope you are doing ok yourself...?

 

Day 11 is when I tend to get hit hard...

 

Can't,

 

Yes, my mistake,......I looked back over the threads and I see I meant that for Nova1.

 

Thanks.

 

May I ask you as I see you are at a low dose,... how are you finding it??

 

Stay well, your mind is clearly at least working better than mine. 

 

ATU 🙏🏻

Im probably not the best to ask... -I havnt had a progressive reduction taper, and my last cut was big...

Things have changed to more mental SX for me, and dont underestimate the power of tiny doses... this stuff is strong, with hooks that hang on to the last...

no wonder that those that jump early or push through SX get bitten...!!

 

Im glad I took the time to understand my whole medical situation as best I could before getting too low... no more "experimenting" from here... -SLOW...

One can never say for sure, but I can see myself taking 8-12 months from here...??

 

But I wouldnt say low is worse or harder at all... probably just more critical to get it right...

 

That 1V 50% cut last month, used up all my saved credits from 6 months holding...

-in other words, I feel like I did at xmas in many ways, but I seem to be healing much quicker..

-see what happens over the next few weeks...

 

So, simply put, I would suggest to, -Get the last bit right... slow, minimal SX based taper, hold as needed... -stick to what we have learnt here, trust in what we know...

-keep the propaganda list handy...

Sorry ATU, this ended up a bit of a blog...

-Thats my fried brain...

 

Can't,

 

Thanks for the reply. I feel like I am failing continuing to hold but I know my body just isn't quite ready yet. It's a conundrum for sure. I will give it another week then see how I feel.

 

Thanks for sharing your wisdom, and hope you are feeling much better soon.

 

 

ATU 🙏🏻

  Hi ATU  when you hold you’re not failing, you’re just changing the way you stay in charge of the situation taking by control of a bad situation, it just a change of tactics nothing more nothing less. It takes brave person to keep trying different ways, not a failure, holding is NOT giving up, its regrouping to keep moving forwards Anyway there's no such thing as failure, its just more chances to keep trying 

 

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

[[ca...]]

  Hi ATU  when you hold you’re not failing, you’re just changing the way you stay in charge of the situation taking by control of a bad situation, it just a change of tactics nothing more nothing less. It takes brave person to keep trying different ways, not a failure, holding is NOT giving up, its regrouping to keep moving forwards Anyway there's no such thing as failure, its just more chances to keep trying    And i hope everyone else is doing ok ~ CD

[[ga...]]

  Hi ATU  when you hold you’re not failing, you’re just changing the way you stay in charge of the situation taking by control of a bad situation, it just a change of tactics nothing more nothing less. It takes brave person to keep trying different ways, not a failure, holding is NOT giving up, its regrouping to keep moving forwards Anyway there's no such thing as failure, its just more chances to keep trying    And i hope everyone else is doing ok ~ CD

 

100% agree! 

[[Ca...]]

Cantfly,

 

I know how annoying and nerve racking it can be to have these disturbances going on around you especially when your in such a sensative state. Lets hope your neighbour starts thinking about his neighbours soon.

 

Hope your feeling better as well and in time I know you will.

 

Heath,

Day 12, always a tricky time for me too. Hope you sail through it and all the rest of the days with little or no uptick in sxs.

 

I doing well except for that floaty boaty sensation not quite dizzy but still a bit floaty if you know what I mean.

 

Peace, healing and windows to everyone!

 

ATU 🙏🏻

Thanks ATU, Im all good, I dont have any neighbours... Nova has a particularly nasty/noisy one though...

 

Hope you are doing ok yourself...?

 

Day 11 is when I tend to get hit hard...

 

Can't,

 

Yes, my mistake,......I looked back over the threads and I see I meant that for Nova1.

 

Thanks.

 

May I ask you as I see you are at a low dose,... how are you finding it??

 

Stay well, your mind is clearly at least working better than mine. 

 

ATU 🙏🏻

Im probably not the best to ask... -I havnt had a progressive reduction taper, and my last cut was big...

Things have changed to more mental SX for me, and dont underestimate the power of tiny doses... this stuff is strong, with hooks that hang on to the last...

no wonder that those that jump early or push through SX get bitten...!!

 

Im glad I took the time to understand my whole medical situation as best I could before getting too low... no more "experimenting" from here... -SLOW...

One can never say for sure, but I can see myself taking 8-12 months from here...??

 

But I wouldnt say low is worse or harder at all... probably just more critical to get it right...

 

That 1V 50% cut last month, used up all my saved credits from 6 months holding...

-in other words, I feel like I did at xmas in many ways, but I seem to be healing much quicker..

-see what happens over the next few weeks...

 

So, simply put, I would suggest to, -Get the last bit right... slow, minimal SX based taper, hold as needed... -stick to what we have learnt here, trust in what we know...

-keep the propaganda list handy...

Sorry ATU, this ended up a bit of a blog...

-Thats my fried brain...

 

Can't,

 

Thanks for the reply. I feel like I am failing continuing to hold but I know my body just isn't quite ready yet. It's a conundrum for sure. I will give it another week then see how I feel.

 

Thanks for sharing your wisdom, and hope you are feeling much better soon.

 

 

ATU 🙏🏻

Thanks ATU, A better day today.. Things sure seem to shake up as I turn the corner now...

A good sign...

 

Looking at your sig, there is no way I would say you are going too fast (by general standards).. But I do see others here at similar speeds, and walking a fine line, with a lot of holding involved...

In situations like these, It realy is a mind game, with many facets... patience, strength, listening to your body, confidence... -You name it...

You are doing a great Job... and sometimes following your gut instinct, right or wrong, can be good for you... (within reason) 

-There was a time i think I shocked myself into a healing cycle..!! -who knows... my main aim was to maintain hope... -Thats the one we dont want to lose...

Every day you are progressing, you are healing... I think our bodies are doing far more than we ever give them credit for... -Than we could ever comprehend... 

Well, kinda like after a major multi trauma...!!

Time is a great investment...

 

My Best...

 

 

 

[[...]]

Hello everyone ... Sorry I've been MIA for a while ..... Things got a bit rough and I wasn't up to much as far as reading and posting . I've just read through all your posts , and send love and healing thoughts to everyone 

 

It's still rough , but at least the lead legs have subsided , difficult to climb stairs, but I can do it at least. This is from my almost 1/16 th mg microtaper over the last three weeks . Other than that I'd say I've sort of plateaued with the other Symptoms. Mostly I just feel incredibly fragile , sometime,s I wonder  if that's just part of my general state of health. It does get a lot worse when I make any reduction tho.

 

On  a positive note  , As long as things don't go further south from here ....what I cut is double what I cut at the end March , beginning April , and the WDs from that were way worse . So something is happening from holding and going slow and I must remember that .

 

I'm holding until things settle down more . However long that takes . I have some kind of baseline now , it's not ideal by any means , but by the end of May I was getting out every day at least for a few hours, a gentle walk and drive , some mediation at the nearby Sanctuary .

 

Funny thing , and I don't know if anyone else experiences this , but pretty much every time I've made any kind of cut , I get a window , even if small. And then the WDs come on... Weird , it's like my body initially says ' yes, I like having a little less of that stuff ' , and then all the repair has to happen.

 

Dear Nova checked in with me , Bless your heart Nova , and I'm so sorry for everything you are going through , wish I could make it better for you .

 

Valley , I love what Nova posted about holds to ATU I think it was , about holding not being failing .....does it belong in the propaganda ? I know there's a quote there already about holding not being failing . But what Nova wrote is a bit different . It was great Nova, thanks .

 

Also the circle and spiral thingy , I saved that image , was it about any kind of healing or was it specific to benzo WD ?

 

Didn't see Begood the last few pages , I hope you're  ok ?

 

Cant....I love  the shocking yourself into healing ..... Could be something to that ? Not gonna try it tho. 

 

Well. All for now , very happy to be able to catch up on all your posts and they're all great as always .

 

Remembering each and every one of you , love, MiYu  :smitten:

 

 

Ps the HEAT .....!!!😳 It's unbelievable ..... Heath you must be getting it too? It's been 100 degrees all week , and I don't have AC ... Wet tee shirts put in the ice box cycled through the day....

Landlord is installing AC unit tonight , can't wait ....

 

 

 

[[be...]]

Hi MiYu, I am here, reading mostly, but I do come out and post, but find that I like reading about all and popping up now and then, but I am always here...

 

I am doing well, some little blips at times, but nothing like anything so many have, so I am grateful always. I have had periods of the lead legs and it is bizarre how I can not seem to make them move, but only for short periods, other little things but always believe that the Brain will present with things that it wants to heal, so I just sit back and let it, and it does go away or sometimes comes back, but always think that My Wonderful Brain knows just where it needs to heal, and I being a good steward of my body and Brain will just let it have its way, as we all know nothing is going to change a thing, only how we look at it and accept it.

 

I am very happy that things are turning for you, I know holding is hard for some, I guess because of my other two holds, I have never had one moment of worry about how long, I just don't I just am one with my Hold and Accept the Process. Stay Strong.

[[Va...]]

Hello everyone ... Sorry I've been MIA for a while ..... Things got a bit rough and I wasn't up to much as far as reading and posting . I've just read through all your posts , and send love and healing thoughts to everyone 

 

It's still rough , but at least the lead legs have subsided , difficult to climb stairs, but I can do it at least. This is from my almost 1/16 th mg microtaper over the last three weeks . Other than that I'd say I've sort of plateaued with the other Symptoms. Mostly I just feel incredibly fragile , sometime,s I wonder  if that's just part of my general state of health. It does get a lot worse when I make any reduction tho.

 

On  a positive note  , As long as things don't go further south from here ....what I cut is double what I cut at the end March , beginning April , and the WDs from that were way worse . So something is happening from holding and going slow and I must remember that .

 

I'm holding until things settle down more . However long that takes . I have some kind of baseline now , it's not ideal by any means , but by the end of May I was getting out every day at least for a few hours, a gentle walk and drive , some mediation at the nearby Sanctuary .

 

Funny thing , and I don't know if anyone else experiences this , but pretty much every time I've made any kind of cut , I get a window , even if small. And then the WDs come on... Weird , it's like my body initially says ' yes, I like having a little less of that stuff ' , and then all the repair has to happen.

 

Dear Nova checked in with me , Bless your heart Nova , and I'm so sorry for everything you are going through , wish I could make it better for you .

 

Valley , I love what Nova posted about holds to ATU I think it was , about holding not being failing .....does it belong in the propaganda ? I know there's a quote there already about holding not being failing . But what Nova wrote is a bit different . It was great Nova, thanks .

 

Also the circle and spiral thingy , I saved that image , was it about any kind of healing or was it specific to benzo WD ?

 

Didn't see Begood the last few pages , I hope you're  ok ?

 

Cant....I love  the shocking yourself into healing ..... Could be something to that ? Not gonna try it tho. 

 

Well. All for now , very happy to be able to catch up on all your posts and they're all great as always .

 

Remembering each and every one of you , love, MiYu  :smitten:

 

 

Ps the HEAT .....!!!😳 It's unbelievable ..... Heath you must be getting it too? It's been 100 degrees all week , and I don't have AC ... Wet tee shirts put in the ice box cycled through the day....

Landlord is installing AC unit tonight , can't wait ....

Hi MiYu. So glad you are figuring out a pattern and will be able to move forward. I'll grab nova's post and add it to the propaganda. Try to stay out of the heat.  --V

[[...]]

Hi MiYu, I am here, reading mostly, but I do come out and post, but find that I like reading about all and popping up now and then, but I am always here...

 

I am doing well, some little blips at times, but nothing like anything so many have, so I am grateful always. I have had periods of the lead legs and it is bizarre how I can not seem to make them move, but only for short periods, other little things but always believe that the Brain will present with things that it wants to heal, so I just sit back and let it, and it does go away or sometimes comes back, but always think that My Wonderful Brain knows just where it needs to heal, and I being a good steward of my body and Brain will just let it have its way, as we all know nothing is going to change a thing, only how we look at it and accept it.

 

I am very happy that things are turning for you, I know holding is hard for some, I guess because of my other two holds, I have never had one moment of worry about how long, I just don't I just am one with my Hold and Accept the Process. Stay Strong.

 

Glad you're ok Begood  you have a great attitude .

Funny thing..... I had a day a few years back when I got " lead legs" and I had never touched a benzo.

Also , the beginning of this whole charade started in Nov 2014 , because I suddenly couldn't walk . I had been unwell for a long time , perimenopause I think mostly . Then this scary not being able to walk thing happened ....it seems to be something in my particular circumstance that does indeed need healing, as it is a symtom that I always get when I make any kind of reduction . Then as I get more stable , it goes away ..... They do say benzo WD will show up where your weakest issue is ... So something in my brain that has to do with walking . Actually , as I'm writing , even as a little kid I could never keep up on the long family walks ... Maybe it started out as something emotional , who knows .

Being One with your hold , I like that 

Love, MiYu 

[[...]]

glad you are figuring out a pattern and will be able to move forward. I'll grab nova's post and add it to the propaganda. Try to stay out of the heat.  --V

 

Thanks Valley , let's hope that's the case , otherwise , I'll just practice being ' One with my hold" , and remember that holding isn't failing 

[[ga...]]

It's so good to see you here, Miyu! I truly hope things keep getting better for you.  :smitten:

[[lo...]]

My theripst wrote my family doc and they are working together  since my cuts have been so bad I am updising to 4mgs a day. 1mg 4xs a day and holding till stable. The past 6 months have been a utter nightmare. Happy to finf hope and relief 

[[Va...]]

My theripst wrote my family doc and they are working together  since my cuts have been so bad I am updising to 4mgs a day. 1mg 4xs a day and holding till stable. The past 6 months have been a utter nightmare. Happy to finf hope and relief 

Great news lost! It's nice when doctors actually work with us.  --V

[[Ca...]]

My theripst wrote my family doc and they are working together  since my cuts have been so bad I am updising to 4mgs a day. 1mg 4xs a day and holding till stable. The past 6 months have been a utter nightmare. Happy to find hope and relief 

yay Lost..!!!!

Must be such a relief and so nice to be validated by your Drs that this is very very real...

Once stable and on level ground, you can have a plan that will work well for you...

My Best Wishes...

[[lo...]]

Thanks everyone, so amazing to feel hope agaib

[[Al...]]

I joined this community in May 2017 at 10mgs Xanax & 75mgs Zopiclone a day.

 

I dropped to 8mgs Xanax 2 weeks ago and am still on 75mgs Zopiclone.

 

These are still pretty high doses. I am hoping to taper off Xanax first, then Zopiclone.

 

Have been on both drugs for 20 years.

 

Although I've only cut 2mgs, my withdrawal side effects are making life pretty hellish.

 

Advice please? Stay at this dose for a little while longer or continue to taper.

 

* My intention was to cut every 2 weeks, which would mean I am due to cut again tomorrow.

 

I'm terrified. I'm having mild panic attacks (on top of withdrawals) every couple of hours. I'm in such a bad space atm, all I can do is lay in bed and get to the bathroom to throw up.

 

Help ...  :'(