The Long Hold Support Group

[[...]]

I've never been symptom-free, either. I am happy if I am functioning. That means I am taking care of myself, eating properly, getting out a couple of times a week, doing my P.T., not leaning on my family and friends too much. The fatigue is always there. The agoraphobia nibbles at the edges of my life all the time. My anxiety is always higher than what would be normal. But it is nothing, no nothing, like before my long hold. So I consider my symptoms to be manageable and am sloth-cutting. If they become unmanageable, I will hold again and try a slower rater. (What's slower than a sloth? )

 

Yes Gard , I'll be happy to be functional enough even with symptoms , and still be able to taper. I'm not quite there yet , as I'm pretty delicate in the balance right now I feel. I actually don't have so much anxiety , it's more physical for me. So that's what makes it hard to be more than minimally functional at the moment . Like you , I can take care of myself , feed myself , do the dishes etc, occasional light cleaning , but I am too shaky to do much else , and get tired very easily.

I hope to improve more than this before I start tapering again. And I have become SO forgetful it's scary! 

Frustrating, I make a list of groceries then leave it behind , put something somewhere ' safe ' and forget where that is etc! Have to keep things pretty simple right now .....

So I'm with you slothing , or actually I wonder if sloths spend time not moving at all? Maybe we need another creature .....? Certain amphibians keep still for very long periods of time .....just stick their tongues out occasionally for a bite of something 

 

Love , MiYu 

 

I'm sorry about all your symptoms still being so bothersome. I can so relate to the fatigue and the forgetfulness. My memory is awful. I'm trying to remember not to talk negatively to myself every time I forget something. Today I actually said, "Nice catch," to myself when I remembered something better-late-than-never. In the past I would have berated myself. These little tweak to my thinking are helping me get through this.

 

And, yes, I'm pretty sure sloths spend a lot of time not moving. Yay, sloths!

 

Gard

 

Thanks Gard .... I'll just keep holding ... I'm starting to feel a bit better after my last wave.

Well done one changing your self compassion 

 

( and I meant reptiles  )

Please no reptiles....

 

Not cute enough huh? Ok Begood, we'll stick with the current zoo , just for you 

[[no...]]

Hi gang  I am beyond exhausted and in agony after being woken up by the upstairs neighbour banging and crashing sometimes for days and nights non stop as he has been since last week so at 3am I rang the noise pollution  council yet again in tears and barely able to speak becasue of symptoms And the last thing I needed was to be making phone calls as its too painful with my ear pain and hyperacusis (sound sensitivity) bought on by withdrwal.

 

They sent him 2 warning letters the last few months  and each time matters got worse I had rang them at 9am yesterday for the 9th time this week( I've been ringing them  and explained to the officer in charge he's a total shit bag as its not just noise problems I have with him either.

 

And I've been trying to cope with all this a year now while tapering and being so unwell, it was a nice apartment block for year's until he moved in back last year. Anyway when I rang at 3am they told me to ring the Police I said its pointless as I did that out of desperation before and they said if he was OUTSIDE making a noise then they could do something, and they couldn't help me.

 

She then said ring them and tell them Noise pollution said to ring then something else I couldn't understand as my ears had had it by then. So not expecting any help I rang them and too my surprise within minutes they were knocking his door  which I knew he wouldn't answer as he drugs it up he smokes Cannabis which isn't a drug as far as I'm concerned but it  still illegal here and he's on other stuff you can see it by looking at him and his aggressive attitude.

 

And I can hear it all form here as well obviously , anyway the Police then rang me from outside and said he won't open the door does this happen often so I told them straight yes I don't know what the hell he's taking but it often goes on for a few days and nights like 4 or longer non stop. They then asked me his name,( he thought I didn't know it but I found it out through someone slese recently) and he's been arrested for burglary before he moved here I also  found out and a few weeks ago the Police were knocking his door I don't know what for and I don't care, but it worked calling them this morning. 

 

There's not been a single sound since and they said if it happens again to call them back out so hopefully this wil put an end to it after a year and me having to ask for a transfer as he's made my life hell? I just hope its freaked his stoned drugged up brain out like he's been freaking mine out and it stays quite as every Friday his I idiot girlfriend comes over with the kids for the weekend and they all run riot up their until all hours here, so I hope he's too paranoid now to have anyone stay or do drugs so he can piss off over her place instead and do his crap, and leave me in peace in my home :tickedoff:

 

 

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

[[no...]]

Hi everyone .......

So , having read the last few pages of posts , I have some confusion 

 

Chalky ....Chappy ( is that right ?) , you have done a long hold and feel you are ready  to cut ..... Congratulations! I wish you the best.

 

And thanks for the quotes as always Nova , you are are a great source of inspiration .

 

To the point- I don't feel stable , I am getting some longer Windows , mixed in with hard time still, but yay.. ...yesterday I was so tired I could hardly move. I slept well last night and this morning have  had a pretty good morning . Symptoms now creeping back in.

 

My question- I am definitely experiencing side effects from the Valium . I get waves of anxiety AFTER I take a dose . I've now noticed this consistently . So I get confused because it's clearly messing with my system , does this mean I just haven't adjusted to the dose I'm on yet? Or is it that I just have side effects and they maybe won't go away until I'm lower in dose ....

 

My symptoms seem to increase throughout the day.

Perhaps this is an unanswerable question. If I were to answer it myself , I think I would say , my nervous system is still very unstable , AND I am getting side effects from the V.

So , keep holding? I guess the confusion comes from the fact that some experience stability as being free of symptoms , and I've never had that really, not completely . Or even close really since I started tapering last year .

 

I too fell into the Ashton trap , grrr...... I'm so mad too that people see her as the answer to everything benzo taper related , and that , like you Nova , its so pervasive it's a really hard mindset to undo. 

 

I don't know what I'd do or where I'd be without you buddies , thank you! You are all so great . I feel truly that it is Grace that brought me here . I'm really really grateful to all you good people , you're the best. And I trust you all so much, you are honest , you have experience, wisdom  and kindness .

 

Wish I could meet you all! ( Nova, one day , when we are well and I visit my family in England , we can meet if you want  , I'd like that )

 

Love, MiYu 

 

Ps , glad your teeth are in great shape Heath , lucky you ! 

Hi MiYu. I determine the time to cut based on the windows. If I'm having windows that last pretty much all day, I know it's time to cut again. I could hold longer I believe and still be fine. its hard not to overthink this, bit if you aren't feeling functional and having periods of close to normal, it may be wise to hold. It's easy to overthink this but if you listen to your body and how you're feeling, you will be fine IMO.  --V

 

Thank you Valley, you're always good at the bottom line 

I am experiencing crushing fatigue after my doses too, but I've still got shaky tremor feelings and the burning of course, which may not go away. Who knows on that one.

 

Anyway , I'm not ready to cut yet. I swear this group is almost 'esoteric ' in its approach to benzo tapering .... I think that's what I like about it ! 

 

Love, MiYu

Hi M I'd really like that as well  We can get together and write a book titled ' DON'T TAKE FKN BENZOS!!!!!  And have that famous painting  ''The Scream'' By the artist  Edvard Munch as its cover

 

 

I'm sure most of us feel like this on times

 

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

[[be...]]

Hi gang  I am beyond exhausted and in agony after being woken up by the upstairs neighbour banging and crashing sometimes for days and nights non stop as he has been since last week so at 3am I rang the noise pollution  council yet again in tears and barely able to speak becasue of symptoms And the last thing I needed was to be making phone calls as its too painful with my ear pain and hyperacusis (sound sensitivity) bought on by withdrwal.

 

They sent him 2 warning letters the last few months  and each time matters got worse I had rang them at 9am yesterday for the 9th time this week( I've been ringing them  and explained to the officer in charge he's a total shit bag as its not just noise problems I have with him either.

 

And I've been trying to cope with all this a year now while tapering and being so unwell, it was a nice apartment block for year's until he moved in back last year. Anyway when I rang at 3am they told me to ring the Police I said its pointless as I did that out of desperation before and they said if he was OUTSIDE making a noise then they could do something, and they couldn't help me.

 

She then said ring them and tell them Noise pollution said to ring then something else I couldn't understand as my ears had had it by then. So not expecting any help I rang them and too my surprise within minutes they were knocking his door  which I knew he wouldn't answer as he drugs it up he smokes Cannabis which isn't a drug as far as I'm concerned but it  still illegal here and he's on other stuff you can see it by looking at him and his aggressive attitude.

 

And I can hear it all form here as well obviously , anyway the Police then rang me from outside and said he won't open the door does this happen often so I told them straight yes I don't know what the hell he's taking but it often goes on for a few days and nights like 4 or longer non stop. They then asked me his name,( he thought I didn't know it but I found it out through someone slese recently) and he's been arrested for burglary before he moved here I also  found out and a few weeks ago the Police were knocking his door I don't know what for and I don't care, but it worked calling them this morning. 

 

There's not been a single sound since and they said if it happens again to call them back out so hopefully this wil put an end to it after a year and me having to ask for a transfer as he's made my life hell? I just hope its freaked his stoned drugged up brain out like he's been freaking mine out and it stays quite as every Friday his I idiot girlfriend comes over with the kids for the weekend and they all run riot up their until all hours here, so I hope he's too paranoid now to have anyone stay or do drugs so he can piss off over her place instead and do his crap, and leave me in peace in my home :tickedoff:

 

 

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

                       

[glow=red,2,300]SISTA'[/glow] Fifi has come to your aid. :thumbsup:

[[no...]]

Hi gang  I am beyond exhausted and in agony after being woken up by the upstairs neighbour banging and crashing sometimes for days and nights non stop as he has been since last week so at 3am I rang the noise pollution  council yet again in tears and barely able to speak becasue of symptoms And the last thing I needed was to be making phone calls as its too painful with my ear pain and hyperacusis (sound sensitivity) bought on by withdrwal.

 

They sent him 2 warning letters the last few months  and each time matters got worse I had rang them at 9am yesterday for the 9th time this week( I've been ringing them  and explained to the officer in charge he's a total shit bag as its not just noise problems I have with him either.

 

And I've been trying to cope with all this a year now while tapering and being so unwell, it was a nice apartment block for year's until he moved in back last year. Anyway when I rang at 3am they told me to ring the Police I said its pointless as I did that out of desperation before and they said if he was OUTSIDE making a noise then they could do something, and they couldn't help me.

 

She then said ring them and tell them Noise pollution said to ring then something else I couldn't understand as my ears had had it by then. So not expecting any help I rang them and too my surprise within minutes they were knocking his door  which I knew he wouldn't answer as he drugs it up he smokes Cannabis which isn't a drug as far as I'm concerned but it  still illegal here and he's on other stuff you can see it by looking at him and his aggressive attitude.

 

And I can hear it all form here as well obviously , anyway the Police then rang me from outside and said he won't open the door does this happen often so I told them straight yes I don't know what the hell he's taking but it often goes on for a few days and nights like 4 or longer non stop. They then asked me his name,( he thought I didn't know it but I found it out through someone slese recently) and he's been arrested for burglary before he moved here I also  found out and a few weeks ago the Police were knocking his door I don't know what for and I don't care, but it worked calling them this morning. 

 

There's not been a single sound since and they said if it happens again to call them back out so hopefully this wil put an end to it after a year and me having to ask for a transfer as he's made my life hell? I just hope its freaked his stoned drugged up brain out like he's been freaking mine out and it stays quite as every Friday his I idiot girlfriend comes over with the kids for the weekend and they all run riot up their until all hours here, so I hope he's too paranoid now to have anyone stay or do drugs so he can piss off over her place instead and do his crap, and leave me in peace in my home :tickedoff:

 

 

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

                       

[glow=red,2,300]SISTA'[/glow] Fifi has come to your aid. :thumbsup:

:laugh: I was going to say Good morning Sista'  but we're in 2 different time zones so your heading for breakfast and I'm not far off dinner time here. I hope your still doing well my dear

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

[[be...]]

Hi gang  I am beyond exhausted and in agony after being woken up by the upstairs neighbour banging and crashing sometimes for days and nights non stop as he has been since last week so at 3am I rang the noise pollution  council yet again in tears and barely able to speak becasue of symptoms And the last thing I needed was to be making phone calls as its too painful with my ear pain and hyperacusis (sound sensitivity) bought on by withdrwal.

 

They sent him 2 warning letters the last few months  and each time matters got worse I had rang them at 9am yesterday for the 9th time this week( I've been ringing them  and explained to the officer in charge he's a total shit bag as its not just noise problems I have with him either.

 

And I've been trying to cope with all this a year now while tapering and being so unwell, it was a nice apartment block for year's until he moved in back last year. Anyway when I rang at 3am they told me to ring the Police I said its pointless as I did that out of desperation before and they said if he was OUTSIDE making a noise then they could do something, and they couldn't help me.

 

She then said ring them and tell them Noise pollution said to ring then something else I couldn't understand as my ears had had it by then. So not expecting any help I rang them and too my surprise within minutes they were knocking his door  which I knew he wouldn't answer as he drugs it up he smokes Cannabis which isn't a drug as far as I'm concerned but it  still illegal here and he's on other stuff you can see it by looking at him and his aggressive attitude.

 

And I can hear it all form here as well obviously , anyway the Police then rang me from outside and said he won't open the door does this happen often so I told them straight yes I don't know what the hell he's taking but it often goes on for a few days and nights like 4 or longer non stop. They then asked me his name,( he thought I didn't know it but I found it out through someone slese recently) and he's been arrested for burglary before he moved here I also  found out and a few weeks ago the Police were knocking his door I don't know what for and I don't care, but it worked calling them this morning. 

 

There's not been a single sound since and they said if it happens again to call them back out so hopefully this wil put an end to it after a year and me having to ask for a transfer as he's made my life hell? I just hope its freaked his stoned drugged up brain out like he's been freaking mine out and it stays quite as every Friday his I idiot girlfriend comes over with the kids for the weekend and they all run riot up their until all hours here, so I hope he's too paranoid now to have anyone stay or do drugs so he can piss off over her place instead and do his crap, and leave me in peace in my home :tickedoff:

 

 

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

                       

[glow=red,2,300]SISTA'[/glow] Fifi has come to your aid. :thumbsup:

:laugh: I was going to say Good morning Sista'  but we're in 2 different time zones so your heading for breakfast and I'm not far off dinner time here. I hope your still doing well my dear

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

Thanks Nova doing well. A few minor blips sometimes but doable. Stand Tall and Stay Strong. :smitten:

[[ca...]]

Valley, thanks and as for what Lynn said i agree i just wish there was more Resarch on this whole benzo taper bit but as i am sure everyone knows there is not much other then Ashton. Off topic i had Chickens for many years and been thinking of getting some more ; ~CD

Aloha CD  xxx  :smitten:

Nova, i got caught up in the Ashton rules bit and whoo hooo did it do me in so i think i am going to sit with you peeps here if you all don`t mind ! Was thinking the other day when you called me Old Chap as when i was younger i worked as a Carpenter and had a older Irish guy who called me Chappy so from now on call me Chappy as i am feeling old enough from this ordeal

Morning "Chappy", don't let the benzo  take any more control of your life, you are a fighter or you would not have gotten this far, be kind to you, and keep 

Begood , thanks and Good Morning back at ya and trying to get my butt out to go Fishing for a bit as lots of rain headed my way and to dizzy to go cut timber as Chainsaws and woozy doozy make for bad company so fishing i shall go after i finish another cup of coffee lol !

 

Ah...fishing!  A favorite pastime for me.  Nothing like feeling one on the line and seeing what you've got when it breaks thru the surface.  You know what they say...a bad day fishing...  Now the chainsaw   I'd probably cut off a limb - and not of a tree!

Thanks to Begood i got some motivation and did go fishing yesterday, was a good day saw some of my old buddies that used to guide like i did so we just shot the breeze while catching fish and seems we are all busted up older guys now so we traded war storys about how bad we all hurt lol ! Lynn , boats pfttt i still have a smaller one for the rivers up here but did sell the big 28 ft. boat when i started the taper was getting a bit too much $$$$ wise not to mention the stress of backing it up in the slips with $100,000 boats next to mine yikes. PS: i still pick night crawlers hee hee i guess i will never grow up lol ! Hope everyone is doing ok as for me i was told to cut the grass today so i best listen to the boss here She can be a tough one lol ! Hope the day is a good one for (((( ALL )))) ~CD

[[ly...]]

 

 

CD,

 

Glad you got out and caught up with your pals.  Yes, boats can be money pits.  My little 12' aluminum w/9hp motor is pretty easy to deal with.  I love to get in it and go.  Something about the smell of the water and the gas... Just cruise around with the sun on my shoulders, taking in the beauty of the river...I beach it on the undeveloped shorelines and walk.

[[ca...]]

 

 

CD,

 

Glad you got out and caught up with your pals.  Yes, boats can be money pits.  My little 12' aluminum w/9hp motor is pretty easy to deal with.  I love to get in it and go.  Something about the smell of the water and the gas... Just cruise around with the sun on my shoulders, taking in the beauty of the river...I beach it on the undeveloped shorelines and walk.

and the water helps drown out the Tinnitus for me also so it`s a win win ! And today i get to ride the Tractor and cut grass another a reprieve from the TT what a life eh!

[[ly...]]

 

 

CD,

 

Glad you got out and caught up with your pals.  Yes, boats can be money pits.  My little 12' aluminum w/9hp motor is pretty easy to deal with.  I love to get in it and go.  Something about the smell of the water and the gas... Just cruise around with the sun on my shoulders, taking in the beauty of the river...I beach it on the undeveloped shorelines and walk.

and the water helps drown out the Tinnitus for me also so it`s a win win ! And today i get to ride the Tractor and cut grass another a reprieve from the TT what a life eh!

 

Funny how the T (and other stuff) vanishes when we are busy with "life".

[[ga...]]

[move]

"TURTLES RULE". :thumbsup: [/move]

 

Wow, what was that creature? It went zipping by so fast I couldn't see it! ( )

http://kids.nationalgeographic.com/content/dam/kids/photos/animals/Mammals/Q-Z/sloth-beach-upside-down.jpg.adapt.945.1.jpg

[[Ca...]]

Hi Everyone... sorry, I Crashed with fatigue for a couple of days...

 

Miyu I have been following your posts with particular interest and relatability... (if thats a word)

I have been wondering about V causing the fatigue.. -and the need to try a cut..  My poor taper buddy must be going mad by now...

But I think your reasoning not to taper yet is sound FWIW..

 

-no matter how much V i took in the past, It never made me feel like this...

And there are too many signs of other instability, to begin to think im not still healing and adjusting..

What I am having is a huge shake up...

Cracking the egg before I hatch... So to speak...

I so nearly got tricked into another cut...

 

Stay strong...

 

So many great posts over the last days!!!

 

My Best to All...

 

[[HO...]]

This is beyond inhumaine and torturous to go through! I just want my life back!😥

 

You are doing the right thing to wait and stabilize. You will get your life back! Then benzos will tell you that you won't but they are lying. And when you come out, you will be a much stronger person. I have learned so much on this journey. Wish I could have learned things in an easier way, but I'm glad I'm not who I was before. It will come for you, too.

 

Gard

 

Thank you. I know what you mean by learning so much, but at such a high price! Thank you so much for your kind words they mean everything!

[[HO...]]

I've never been symptom-free, either. I am happy if I am functioning. That means I am taking care of myself, eating properly, getting out a couple of times a week, doing my P.T., not leaning on my family and friends too much. The fatigue is always there. The agoraphobia nibbles at the edges of my life all the time. My anxiety is always higher than what would be normal. But it is nothing, no nothing, like before my long hold. So I consider my symptoms to be manageable and am sloth-cutting. If they become unmanageable, I will hold again and try a slower rater. (What's slower than a sloth? )

 

Yes Gard , I'll be happy to be functional enough even with symptoms , and still be able to taper. I'm not quite there yet , as I'm pretty delicate in the balance right now I feel. I actually don't have so much anxiety , it's more physical for me. So that's what makes it hard to be more than minimally functional at the moment . Like you , I can take care of myself , feed myself , do the dishes etc, occasional light cleaning , but I am too shaky to do much else , and get tired very easily.

I hope to improve more than this before I start tapering again. And I have become SO forgetful it's scary! 

Frustrating, I make a list of groceries then leave it behind , put something somewhere ' safe ' and forget where that is etc! Have to keep things pretty simple right now .....

So I'm with you slothing , or actually I wonder if sloths spend time not moving at all? Maybe we need another creature .....? Certain reptiles keep still for very long periods of time .....just stick their tongues out occasionally for a bite of something 

 

Love , MiYu 

 

None of your holds have helped you?

[[be...]]

Hi Everyone... sorry, I Crashed with fatigue for a couple of days...

 

Miyu I have been following your posts with particular interest and relatability... (if thats a word)

I have been wondering about V causing the fatigue.. -and the need to try a cut..  My poor taper buddy must be going mad by now...

But I think your reasoning not to taper yet is sound FWIW..

 

-no matter how much V i took in the past, It never made me feel like this...

And there are too many signs of other instability, to begin to think im not still healing and adjusting..

What I am having is a huge shake up...

Cracking the egg before I hatch... So to speak...

I so nearly got tricked into another cut...

 

Stay strong...

 

So many great posts over the last days!!!

 

My Best to All...

Hey fellow turtle thanks for dropping in letting us know what has been going on Hoping that some good changes will continue and the weary ones leave Asap. You are at the right place for cracking the egg before it is hatched....nice nesting spots left in Valleys Chook coup.....

[[Ca...]]

Hi Everyone... sorry, I Crashed with fatigue for a couple of days...

 

Miyu I have been following your posts with particular interest and relatability... (if thats a word)

I have been wondering about V causing the fatigue.. -and the need to try a cut..  My poor taper buddy must be going mad by now...

But I think your reasoning not to taper yet is sound FWIW..

 

-no matter how much V i took in the past, It never made me feel like this...

And there are too many signs of other instability, to begin to think im not still healing and adjusting..

What I am having is a huge shake up...

Cracking the egg before I hatch... So to speak...

I so nearly got tricked into another cut...

 

Stay strong...

 

So many great posts over the last days!!!

 

My Best to All...

Hey fellow turtle thanks for dropping in letting us know what has been going on Hoping that some good changes will continue and the weary ones leave Asap. You are at the right place for cracking the egg before it is hatched....nice nesting spots left in Valleys Chook coup.....

Thanks BG..

You know Valleys chook coup a tad to well, thinks I... -I bet Cookie does lay more than one egg a week.. !!

You Cant Begood...

[[be...]]

Hi Everyone... sorry, I Crashed with fatigue for a couple of days...

 

Miyu I have been following your posts with particular interest and relatability... (if thats a word)

I have been wondering about V causing the fatigue.. -and the need to try a cut..  My poor taper buddy must be going mad by now...

But I think your reasoning not to taper yet is sound FWIW..

 

-no matter how much V i took in the past, It never made me feel like this...

And there are too many signs of other instability, to begin to think im not still healing and adjusting..

What I am having is a huge shake up...

Cracking the egg before I hatch... So to speak...

I so nearly got tricked into another cut...

 

Stay strong...

 

So many great posts over the last days!!!

 

My Best to All...

Hey fellow turtle thanks for dropping in letting us know what has been going on Hoping that some good changes will continue and the weary ones leave Asap. You are at the right place for cracking the egg before it is hatched....nice nesting spots left in Valleys Chook coup.....

Thanks BG..

You know Valleys chook coup a tad to well, thinks I... -I bet Cookie does lay more than one egg a week.. !!

You Cant Begood...

[glow=red,2,300]You "rotten egg" boy.... [/glow]

[[ca...]]

                                                                                                                                                                                                   

    Hope, holds help many i think mine is helping and its only been 10 days and i am no rush to go back into the Rabbit Hole if i can help it ! And that Turtle is making me hungry Cant 

[[Va...]]

Hi Everyone... sorry, I Crashed with fatigue for a couple of days...

 

Miyu I have been following your posts with particular interest and relatability... (if thats a word)

I have been wondering about V causing the fatigue.. -and the need to try a cut..  My poor taper buddy must be going mad by now...

But I think your reasoning not to taper yet is sound FWIW..

 

-no matter how much V i took in the past, It never made me feel like this...

And there are too many signs of other instability, to begin to think im not still healing and adjusting..

What I am having is a huge shake up...

Cracking the egg before I hatch... So to speak...

I so nearly got tricked into another cut...

 

Stay strong...

 

So many great posts over the last days!!!

 

My Best to All...

Hey fellow turtle thanks for dropping in letting us know what has been going on Hoping that some good changes will continue and the weary ones leave Asap. You are at the right place for cracking the egg before it is hatched....nice nesting spots left in Valleys Chook coup.....

Thanks BG..

You know Valleys chook coup a tad to well, thinks I... -I bet Cookie does lay more than one egg a week.. !!

You Cant Begood...

Sadly, cookie only eats cookies. She is past her egg laying prime.  --V

[[Va...]]

I've never been symptom-free, either. I am happy if I am functioning. That means I am taking care of myself, eating properly, getting out a couple of times a week, doing my P.T., not leaning on my family and friends too much. The fatigue is always there. The agoraphobia nibbles at the edges of my life all the time. My anxiety is always higher than what would be normal. But it is nothing, no nothing, like before my long hold. So I consider my symptoms to be manageable and am sloth-cutting. If they become unmanageable, I will hold again and try a slower rater. (What's slower than a sloth? )

 

Yes Gard , I'll be happy to be functional enough even with symptoms , and still be able to taper. I'm not quite there yet , as I'm pretty delicate in the balance right now I feel. I actually don't have so much anxiety , it's more physical for me. So that's what makes it hard to be more than minimally functional at the moment . Like you , I can take care of myself , feed myself , do the dishes etc, occasional light cleaning , but I am too shaky to do much else , and get tired very easily.

I hope to improve more than this before I start tapering again. And I have become SO forgetful it's scary! 

Frustrating, I make a list of groceries then leave it behind , put something somewhere ' safe ' and forget where that is etc! Have to keep things pretty simple right now .....

So I'm with you slothing , or actually I wonder if sloths spend time not moving at all? Maybe we need another creature .....? Certain reptiles keep still for very long periods of time .....just stick their tongues out occasionally for a bite of something 

 

Love , MiYu 

 

None of your holds have helped you?

Hope my hold definitely helped but it took the whole 6 months and I was ready to go longer If needed. This process will drive you crazy if you let it. Try not to overthink and just listen to your body. It's the expert on when to cut again. Hang in there! --V

[[HO...]]

                                                                                                                                                                                                   

    Hope, holds help many i think mine is helping and its only been 10 days and i am no rush to go back into the Rabbit Hole if i can help it ! And that Turtle is making me hungry Cant 

 

Do holds ever cause tolerance withdrawl?

[[HO...]]

Hi Everyone... sorry, I Crashed with fatigue for a couple of days...

 

Miyu I have been following your posts with particular interest and relatability... (if thats a word)

I have been wondering about V causing the fatigue.. -and the need to try a cut..  My poor taper buddy must be going mad by now...

But I think your reasoning not to taper yet is sound FWIW..

 

-no matter how much V i took in the past, It never made me feel like this...

And there are too many signs of other instability, to begin to think im not still healing and adjusting..

What I am having is a huge shake up...

Cracking the egg before I hatch... So to speak...

I so nearly got tricked into another cut...

 

Stay strong...

 

So many great posts over the last days!!!

 

My Best to All...

Hey fellow turtle thanks for dropping in letting us know what has been going on Hoping that some good changes will continue and the weary ones leave Asap. You are at the right place for cracking the egg before it is hatched....nice nesting spots left in Valleys Chook coup.....

 

Sorry about your fatigue it's the worst can you sleep though?

[[ca...]]

                                                                                                                                                                                                   

    Hope, holds help many i think mine is helping and its only been 10 days and i am no rush to go back into the Rabbit Hole if i can help it ! And that Turtle is making me hungry Cant 

 

Do holds ever cause tolerance withdrawl?

Hope, i honestly have no idea i been tapering for 2 1/2 years from 4 mgs klonopin and now in the 20`s mg wise of valium and no more more k , sure i feel worse actually can`t wait for my pm dose of v but back to the question of tolorance w/d i was most likely in it for years on the 4 mgs of k . After all i just wrote again honestly i really don`t know and hopefully others will jump in on this question ! Like Valley said don`t get to worked up over things and such as i know it`s hard but listen to your body it wil tell you alot more then you believe so trust your feelings and keep asking what you need to there are many who can offer their opinions ! Hang tight and do your best you will get thru this Cluster ( blank ) ~CD

[[Ca...]]

                                                                                                                                                                                                   

    Hope, holds help many i think mine is helping and its only been 10 days and i am no rush to go back into the Rabbit Hole if i can help it ! And that Turtle is making me hungry Cant 

oh Bite Me!!! -ha ha..

 

Hope I Answered on another support thread.. Gabapentin, I think... sorry my memory is shot...

But yes, Did and Is, helping me...

As for Tolerance, (which i think is different from WD)...

I think only if one held for a very long time beyond necissary...

 

Valley, I think BG wants cookie to hatch a turtle egg...

[[be...]]

                                                                                                                                                                                                   

    Hope, holds help many i think mine is helping and its only been 10 days and i am no rush to go back into the Rabbit Hole if i can help it ! And that Turtle is making me hungry Cant 

oh Bite Me!!! -ha ha..

 

Hope I Answered on another support thread.. Gabapentin, I think... sorry my memory is shot...

But yes, Did and Is, helping me...

As for Tolerance, (which i think is different from WD)...

I think only if one held for a very long time beyond necissary...

 

Valley, I think BG wants cookie to hatch a turtle egg...

Is that possible to have a turtle and a chook....what would the wee one be a "chotle", help me here...I have no idea how eggs are laid...