The Long Hold Support Group

[[ho...]]

Hey Guys- I am so confused! I know that everyone is different and I know we all have to find what works for us, but someone told me on another thread that lowering % of my dose may not be a good idea and just keep going. What? I feel like crap, trying to get my sxs under control and hold for just a bit and mention I will probably go smaller % and they tell me that? I really don't know what to read and what not to read on here anymore. It seriously makes my anxiety go thru the roof! UUGGHH. Comments or opinions are very welcome!!!

i posted something very similar on this group just this week. people are just giving their opinions of what worked for them. but we are all different. i am currently in a 4 month hold. i believe for my own reasons a hold is necessary. all the contradictions can absolutely make you confused and anxiety worse. but as everyone has said this is your taper. and no one is going to convince me to not do what my gut is telling me to do. there is a saying in AA "take what you need and leave the rest". begood posted a similar saying to my post i put up like yours. everyones story here is different and everybody is different. do what you think is best for you. 

[[Ki...]]

If I had cut a whole mg a month like a few people told me I could " get away with" early on I would probably not be able to type. Those who are lucky enough to have gut instincts usually- not always but usually do better following them if its a reasonable thing!

[[jr...]]

Hey Guys- I am so confused! I know that everyone is different and I know we all have to find what works for us, but someone told me on another thread that lowering % of my dose may not be a good idea and just keep going. What? I feel like crap, trying to get my sxs under control and hold for just a bit and mention I will probably go smaller % and they tell me that? I really don't know what to read and what not to read on here anymore. It seriously makes my anxiety go thru the roof! UUGGHH. Comments or opinions are very welcome!!!

 

 

when my side effects ramped up, I would hold till they subside. If holding don't work in a week or two, I always did a slight up dose. We are all different but we can taper without immense suffering. I have heard people say to keep cutting no matter what but I truly think that is ridiculous.

[[be...]]

If I had cut a whole mg a month like a few people told me I could " get away with" early on I would probably not be able to type. Those who are lucky enough to have gut instincts usually- not always but usually do better following them if its a reasonable thing!

You are so right. By the way Kitty, I have been here almost two years in June, and Gard informed me about the orange button about two weeks ago. so don't worry about being a tad late......

[[be...]]

Hey Guys- I am so confused! I know that everyone is different and I know we all have to find what works for us, but someone told me on another thread that lowering % of my dose may not be a good idea and just keep going. What? I feel like crap, trying to get my sxs under control and hold for just a bit and mention I will probably go smaller % and they tell me that? I really don't know what to read and what not to read on here anymore. It seriously makes my anxiety go thru the roof! UUGGHH. Comments or opinions are very welcome!!!

 

 

when my side effects ramped up, I would hold till they subside. If holding don't work in a week or two, I always did a slight up dose. We are all different but we can taper without immense suffering. I have heard people say to keep cutting no matter what but I truly think that is ridiculous.

That is the key a bit of suffering OK, but the struggling going on is uncalled for, but the sad fact is that they reached out and got the advice and did not trust their own gut and took it as Gospel. Hope you are doing well.

[[Va...]]

Hey Guys- I am so confused! I know that everyone is different and I know we all have to find what works for us, but someone told me on another thread that lowering % of my dose may not be a good idea and just keep going. What? I feel like crap, trying to get my sxs under control and hold for just a bit and mention I will probably go smaller % and they tell me that? I really don't know what to read and what not to read on here anymore. It seriously makes my anxiety go thru the roof! UUGGHH. Comments or opinions are very welcome!!!

Hi BBM. The great thing about the long hold group is we want everyone to feel welcome and supported whether they're holding or not. There are a lot of buddies who are full of wisdom and knowledge here who can offer advice and support.

 

What I've found I have to do is just stick to a few groups that are supportive and try not to get caught up in the many ideas and philosophies floating around on the main forum. For every piece of advice you get, there is always an opposing view and it can get frustrating and even ramp up your anxiety. I know after my first few weeks on BB, I had to take a break and figure out what I was doing because I was just getting confused.

 

Please keep posting even if you don't do long holds. You'll get great advice and support! I wish we could change the name to the chicken/turtle/sloth slow taper support group lol.  --V

 

 

[[bb...]]

Thank you everyone for your kind words. I think I do need a little break from BB right now for my own good. I will report back to you kind folks as soon as I stabilize and figure out how I'll be proceeding. You guys are awesome and I mean that from the bottom of my heart!!!

[[be...]]

Thank you everyone for your kind words. I think I do need a little break from BB right now for my own good. I will report back to you kind folks as soon as I stabilize and figure out how I'll be proceeding. You guys are awesome and I mean that from the bottom of my heart!!!

I wish you well, and hope you stabilize soon, and when I first came here, I also left for a brief while, as I felt lost, but about some other things. I was hoping that we have given you good advice and hopefully have not added to how you are feeling about the different advice that you do not feel good about. Stay Strong.

[[bb...]]

Begood- y'all's advice has been great. Best group of people I've come upon here. Thank you again and I'll be in touch later. 

[[Ca...]]

Hi Guys, Girls, Artists and BB Tutors...

 

Am still holding, things are still up and down, but dont appear to be getting worse anymore... -yay..

 

My heart bleeds for what my 14yo son is missing out on, its just been the two of us for years now...

so getting stable and functional is my priority..

I know my lowest possible dose is 1.5V and am on 2V now...

I dropped from 5 straight to 2.5V as i found this site early December, and suspect my "stable" dose would be in there somewhere (3 or 4v)... but how could one possibly know.. I didnt start a serious taper until 2.5v, and perhaps 10 or 15v is playing its hand now...

 

I also dropped a lot of opiates over recent years, ending with a C/T from 100mg/d or realisticly probably more, 7 months ago...

 

-I was wondering if Valley or anyone could relate how their sx, particularly GI, insomnia and fatigue, reacted to any opiate related W/D... -I guess im thinking its the opiate sx that are holding me up, making tapering the V further, rather difficult...

 

Pain medicine specialist thinks replace the V (then at about 10mg) with suboxone... -I think NOT...?

 

Anyway, any thoughts would be rather welcome, pieces in the puzzle, perhaps...

 

(No need to be too diplomatic, i will take info as your own thoughts...) -to make it easier...

 

Thanks everyone...

 

 

[[Va...]]

Hi Guys, Girls, Artists and BB Tutors...

 

Am still holding, things are still up and down, but dont appear to be getting worse anymore... -yay..

 

My heart bleeds for what my 14yo son is missing out on, its just been the two of us for years now...

so getting stable and functional is my priority..

I know my lowest possible dose is 1.5V and am on 2V now...

I dropped from 5 straight to 2.5V as i found this site early December, and suspect my "stable" dose would be in there somewhere (3 or 4v)... but how could one possibly know.. I didnt start a serious taper until 2.5v, and perhaps 10 or 15v is playing its hand now...

 

I also dropped a lot of opiates over recent years, ending with a C/T from 100mg/d or realisticly probably more, 7 months ago...

 

-I was wondering if Valley or anyone could relate how their sx, particularly GI, insomnia and fatigue, reacted to any opiate related W/D... -I guess im thinking its the opiate sx that are holding me up, making tapering the V further, rather difficult...

 

Pain medicine specialist thinks replace the V (then at about 10mg) with suboxone... -I think NOT...?

 

Anyway, any thoughts would be rather welcome, pieces in the puzzle, perhaps...

 

(No need to be too diplomatic, i will take info as your own thoughts...) -to make it easier...

 

Thanks everyone...

Hi cantfly. I would definitely stay away from further opiates. Especially suboxone as it has the nastiest withdrawal of all opiates. Looking back, I would have to say the my ct of opiates had a long lasting effect on sxs. Fatigue, GI, insomnia was at its worst for a month after the opiate ct. I think it took the 6 month hold to not only stabilize the benzo withdrawal but to get over protracted opiate withdrawal. I do know it's at least 6 months for your brain to recover from an opiate ct and can take up to a year before full energy returns.

 

I've felt so much better since I hit the year mark on the beginning of the benzo taper and opiate ct last year. There was a definite change in sxs. I have much less fatigue, can make it through the whole day working and engaging with others, pain is way down etc.  Holding for me was the best decision I ever made. I believe it allowed healing from both the opiate ct and large benzo cuts. The weird thing was I would stabilize between benzo cuts until I ct'd opiates. It was all downhill from there.

 

I'm sure you'll figure this out and be fine.  --V

[[ho...]]

Hi Guys, Girls, Artists and BB Tutors...

 

Am still holding, things are still up and down, but dont appear to be getting worse anymore... -yay..

 

My heart bleeds for what my 14yo son is missing out on, its just been the two of us for years now...

so getting stable and functional is my priority..

I know my lowest possible dose is 1.5V and am on 2V now...

I dropped from 5 straight to 2.5V as i found this site early December, and suspect my "stable" dose would be in there somewhere (3 or 4v)... but how could one possibly know.. I didnt start a serious taper until 2.5v, and perhaps 10 or 15v is playing its hand now...

 

I also dropped a lot of opiates over recent years, ending with a C/T from 100mg/d or realisticly probably more, 7 months ago...

 

-I was wondering if Valley or anyone could relate how their sx, particularly GI, insomnia and fatigue, reacted to any opiate related W/D... -I guess im thinking its the opiate sx that are holding me up, making tapering the V further, rather difficult...

 

Pain medicine specialist thinks replace the V (then at about 10mg) with suboxone... -I think NOT...?

 

Anyway, any thoughts would be rather welcome, pieces in the puzzle, perhaps...

 

(No need to be too diplomatic, i will take info as your own thoughts...) -to make it easier...

 

Thanks everyone...

I know many people some very close to me who had to withdraw off of suboxyone. It was absolutely horrible. The fact they he would want to give you that over v is unfathomable but nothing surprises me anymore.

[[ga...]]

Begood- y'all's advice has been great. Best group of people I've come upon here. Thank you again and I'll be in touch later. 

 

Love your avatar!

 

V is right. You pick 2 or 3 supportive threads and stick to them. I used to read all over the place. Finally I realized I had learned all I needed to learn. At that point I cut way back. I can only really deal with about 3 groups at a time or my brain gets fried. And sometimes I need to take breaks, too, and attend to other parts of my life. So you are being wise. I wish you hope and healing.

 

Gard

[[Ca...]]

Thanks Valley and Hope, (and those that read but couldnt answer),

 

No fear on the suboxone... I did my C/T in clinic, by choice, was sposed to get 3day naloxone wafer taper, but the first 2mg wafer made me so high, Very strange, considering...

Anyways, so i refused anymore wafers... so they sent me home early, -not that i argued...

 

My specialist is private, so its money orientated, and partly that they look at my files and assume i should be on opiates, -it drives me nuts... so they r all sacked now, its just me, my GP and orthopeidics... (mostly)...

 

Its early days yet, and i have said it too many times before... -but i think im turning a big slow corner now, and had a 6 hr micro window today... -yay...

 

Thank you everyone... knowing you are here, not judging, makes a world of difference...

T.

[[Va...]]

Thanks Valley and Hope, (and those that read but couldnt answer),

 

No fear on the suboxone... I did my C/T in clinic, by choice, was sposed to get 3day naloxone wafer taper, but the first 2mg wafer made me so high, Very strange, considering...

Anyways, so i refused anymore wafers... so they sent me home early, -not that i argued...

 

My specialist is private, so its money orientated, and partly that they look at my files and assume i should be on opiates, -it drives me nuts... so they r all sacked now, its just me, my GP and orthopeidics... (mostly)...

 

Its early days yet, and i have said it too many times before... -but i think im turning a big slow corner now, and had a 6 hr micro window today... -yay...

 

Thank you everyone... knowing you are here, not judging, makes a world of difference...

T.

That's great you had a brief window!  It's a sign of healing. Have you considered or do you have access to low dose naltrexone? I've found it has helped me out a lot but you have to find the right dose so if you try it, start really low. --V

[[ly...]]

Thanks Valley and Hope, (and those that read but couldnt answer),

 

No fear on the suboxone... I did my C/T in clinic, by choice, was sposed to get 3day naloxone wafer taper, but the first 2mg wafer made me so high, Very strange, considering...

Anyways, so i refused anymore wafers... so they sent me home early, -not that i argued...

 

My specialist is private, so its money orientated, and partly that they look at my files and assume i should be on opiates, -it drives me nuts... so they r all sacked now, its just me, my GP and orthopeidics... (mostly)...

 

Its early days yet, and i have said it too many times before... -but i think im turning a big slow corner now, and had a 6 hr micro window today... -yay...

 

Thank you everyone... knowing you are here, not judging, makes a world of difference...

T.

That's great you had a brief window!  It's a sign of healing. Have you considered or do you have access to low dose naltrexone? I've found it has helped me out a lot but you have to find the right dose so if you try it, start really low. --V

 

Hey CF!  So glad to hear about the window.   I don't know about the pain killers so can't comment on that but looking at your taper history it's been very fast.  I did this early on and it took a bit for things to settle down and start improving.  The hold was definitely the right move for me and it seems to be moving you in the right direction.  Hope those windows get bigger and more frequent.

[[be...]]

CT, Hey [glow=red,2,300]"GREAT NEWS HAVING A MICRO WINDOW" :thumbsup: [/glow]

[[ga...]]

So happy for your window, CT!

[[Ca...]]

Thanks everyone

Valley, ty, i will look into that, is that sometimes used for alcohol w/d?

I have a great Dr, so if i can justify a trial, no prob...

I have bedn trickling in a tiny amount of codeine without any escalation issues, infact even reducing it to nil on occasion without thought recently. Another good sign, i guess...

 

Lynn, yes.. tooo fast... lol..

On the bigger v doses, they were as needed and some days between doses..

I knew not of half life... ooops

So i dropped well into w/d, and knew not of waves... double oops...

Crazy days... but here we are, and feeling positive for the first time in a long while...

 

So thanks again everyone...

 

[[...]]

Thanks Valley and Hope, (and those that read but couldnt answer),

 

No fear on the suboxone... I did my C/T in clinic, by choice, was sposed to get 3day naloxone wafer taper, but the first 2mg wafer made me so high, Very strange, considering...

Anyways, so i refused anymore wafers... so they sent me home early, -not that i argued...

 

My specialist is private, so its money orientated, and partly that they look at my files and assume i should be on opiates, -it drives me nuts... so they r all sacked now, its just me, my GP and orthopeidics... (mostly)...

 

Its early days yet, and i have said it too many times before... -but i think im turning a big slow corner now, and had a 6 hr micro window today... -yay...

 

Thank you everyone... knowing you are here, not judging, makes a world of difference...

T.

That's great you had a brief window!  It's a sign of healing. Have you considered or do you have access to low dose naltrexone? I've found it has helped me out a lot but you have to find the right dose so if you try it, start really low. --V

 

hi Valley ( and hi Cantfly)

Are you still taking the LDN Valley? If so, what dose do you take? My doc prescribed it for me to see if it helped the burning pain. I started with .5 mg... Didn't feel much, tried 1 mg, might be helping mood and energy . 1.5 mg seemed to give me a headache and stomach pains. I'm not sure, could be still related  to the V. Anyway .... I'm off and on with it and not sure if to continue.

 

General question for folks .... Do you or have you ever gone through a period of feeling really irritable. I can hardly stand myself right now I feel so irritated. It's sort of a body sensation that translates into irritibility..... It's the burning and being stuck all over with  pins thing again ...

 

Love, MiYu 

[[He...]]

I've been reading but not posting much. I don't know anything about opiates or klonopin. Or naltrexone. And am not able to give any suggestions.

But I do offer all of you who are suffering, canfly, Hopefreegirl, bbmom  and anyone else, all my hopes and prayers for peace and healing, and strength and courage to get through these difficult times.  I believe that holding will help you all to get to a better place. I'm glad that you have come to this site so those who know can give you the support you need.Glad that you have decided to hold too.

 

As for me.....I need hugs.. my low back is killing me.  Taking Alleve, which helps somewhat, but mostly just accepting it and doing what I can to bear with it. Strange how it will go from bad to good and from better to worse from hour to hour. Everyday day changes  but it's never gone.. I never know what to expect.  Can't really plan on doing anything cause of this pAin. Lowback pain for me is almost the worst wdsx ever. Life is horrible lately. I know holding will make it better.....maybe even my last tiny cut was too soon?  Oh well...long hold now.

Heath :-[

 

 

MIYU, sorry I don't know anything about LDC or whatever it is that you asked about. I'm so sorry that your pins and needles and burning are still going on. I hooe they will disappear very soon. I hope you are still getting those windows! And I'm so glad you are still holding.that is the very best thing you can do.  (((Hugs)))

[[Al...]]

Heath,

 

Sorry to hear about the back pain. Don't forget to use heat/ cold alternately.

It will get better soon.

 

Miyu,

 

I get the pins and needles thing in fact Ihave had it now for the last 24-35 hours. I always get this on two instances. First when my sleep goes bad on me and it has for the past two nights. Second when I get anxious and since sleep makes me anxious,..well. I'm also anxious since I have to fly out to Mexico on Wednesday. That should normally be a good thing right, a Mexican Mayan vacation but no, I have to make into a anxiety!

 

Miyu, one thing I have noticed is that when I get those pins & needles for me it means I am resisting it and it makes it more intense and last longer. Try to just accept it and relax into it. If you can do this you might just fine that it ebbs away. I hope so.

 

Heath, here are your hugs,.  :hug:

 

Peace & Healing

 

ATU 🙏

[[Ca...]]

Heath, thanks for your well wishes, sorry about the back, im sure you know all the tricks, but im sending an express heat pack your way..

 

MiYu, hi also...

[[Va...]]

MiYu - I use 3mg of ldn. I started with 1.5mg. It seems to help with a lot of the sxs. My head is clearer, energy up slightly, pain is down too. I think it generally helps with mood. I've been able to work more and spent yesterday working from 8:00 to 6:00. Never thought I'd be able to do that any time soon so either the ldn is really helping or the taper rate I'm on is helping out a lot. Sorry for the pins and needles crap. I still get it off and on. Irritability is also definitely a withdrawal symptom. There have been days when I even get irritated with my cat for meowing constantly lol. I've learned telling her to shut up does nothing though. Hope these things pass soon for you.

 

Heath - I wish the back pain would subside for you.  It's the reason I got put on the stupid Valium. There are times when it seems to be more intense as I taper but lessens and then repeats. I'm finding a lot of other joint pain seems to be improving surprisingly and am left with the thought that the Valium was the culprit for the spread of pain from my back to all over my whole right side. Some day this will be behind us and so will all the horrid symptoms of withdrawal.  --V

[[Va...]]

Thanks everyone

Valley, ty, i will look into that, is that sometimes used for alcohol w/d?

I have a great Dr, so if i can justify a trial, no prob...

I have bedn trickling in a tiny amount of codeine without any escalation issues, infact even reducing it to nil on occasion without thought recently. Another good sign, i guess...

 

Lynn, yes.. tooo fast... lol..

On the bigger v doses, they were as needed and some days between doses..

I knew not of half life... ooops

So i dropped well into w/d, and knew not of waves... double oops...

Crazy days... but here we are, and feeling positive for the first time in a long while...

 

So thanks again everyone...

It is used for alcohol abuse and opiate overdose and abuse prevention. They use a lot higher doses though. The idea is that it supercharges endorphins and causes a strengthening of the immune system, regulation of hormones and other beneficial health effects. The nice thing about it is it's cheap and pretty much side effect free. No dependency is ever built so no withdrawal from it. I just thought I'd give it a shot after trying it last year. I started again a few weeks ago and feel it has made a positive difference.  --V